


The Living and The Dead

by Butterflyfish



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Vampire, Angst, Apocalypse, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon/Non canon, Canonical Character Death, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Menstrual Sex, Menstruation, Menstruation Kink, Minor Character Death, Not a lot of Menstruation sex, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Smut, Swearing, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Vampire Daryl, Vampire Daryl Dixon, Violence, Walkers (Walking Dead), Zombies, a little bit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-25
Updated: 2018-06-10
Packaged: 2018-07-26 18:11:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 65
Words: 167,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7584727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Butterflyfish/pseuds/Butterflyfish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Daryl is the last of his species, in a world that has just turned stranger and strnger since the day his brother turned him.</p><p>He's living as normal a life as you can on your own in the woods surrounded by Walkers... until Evie shows up, and threatens to bring all his instincts right back to the surface.</p><p>We start between Beth's disappearence and Joe and the 'Claimer's' appearance.</p><p>There will be canon non canon thoughout.</p><p>Work in Progress, of course, and other characters will arrive as and when.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, I have a couple of people who follow my work and to them I have to make a huge apology.
> 
> I busted my phone because I am SO clumsy and when the husband tried to fix it he broke it more. All my works for other WIPs are on there!! #sadface. 
> 
> So this is to keep me at peace and hopefully sate all our desires for more. I love you guys, you lift me with every 'read' and 'kudos' and comment, every single time.  
> I'm still here, Abra and Artemis are still here, they're just trapped in my phone for a bit :/
> 
> EDIT: I have big plans for the appearance of the Saviours, so please be aware this fic is going to keep going for a while :)

The night was dark, no moon had risen that evening. It was crisp, and cool, but he didn’t feel it. He stood, stock still in the slight breeze. His dark and lank hair whisping around his shoulders. He thought, finally, of all the things that had brought him here, to this point in time. To these woods. To this loneliness.

Merle had started it, his damned older brother had cursed him to this, convinced he shouldn’t suffer that fate alone, and now, Daryl was the one alone, suffering this life in solitude.

He sighed, but despite the cold air no vapour escaped him. yep, Goddamned Merle. He smiled a little. He missed his dumb-ass big brother every day. Despite all he had done to Daryl, what he had turned him into, he still missed him. Missed the others too, no matter what he said to Beth. He closed his eyes.

Beth.

He couldn’t dwell on that, not right now. There was the more pressing issue of whoever it was behind him, creeping. He’d felt the presence a while ago, smelled her scent on the breeze. He hoped she’d wander on her merry way, but she was wandering straight towards him.

He sighed again. Hell, What did he have to lose now anyway, he’d lost just about everything.

 

 ~~~~~~~

_Merle had got to him, just before the world turned. Turned in a different way._

_“Won’t hurt ya none” he’d said, the lyin’ sacka shit. ”Well, maybe jus’ a li’l pinch” He had given Daryl an open mouthed grin, his teeth sparklin’ in the low light of their shack. “World’ll be ours, Li’l brother. wimmin’ll fear ya, n want ya in equal measures. ya’ll be strong, n fast, n immortal” Daryl shrank away from Merle then._

_“Immortal?” he questioned, unsure he wanted that, but Merle’d shrugged,_

_“Well, pretty much. C’mon Darlina, what are ya, scaret? huh? ya li’l chicken shit girlie girl? C’mon boy, won’t hurt ya none”_

_Merle lied, more’n once. It did hurt, like a bitch, and now he was alone. They weren’t immortal. not much could kill ‘em, not walker bites, that was for sure, but Merle was dead._

_They weren’t immortal at all._

~~~~~~~

 

He turned his head slightly as the rustling of leaves drew within normal earshot. She was behind, slightly to the left, and she smelled like rain on a hot-ass day. Sweet, n refreshin’.

He heard her breath catch in her throat, and he span, lifting his crossbow to his eye in a split second. She emerged before him, a mass of Auburn hair and wide green eyes, startled like a deer in headlights. He could tell from the look on her face, she feared him.

But for none of the reasons he expected.

* * *

She turned to find him in front of her. Dark hair and dark blue eyes, pale skin glowing ethereal in the darkness. Her breath caught audibly. She didn’t expect him to be so beautiful.

The thought surprised her, and she fought to keep her face hard, her knife raised by her ear, Beautiful or not, he was a stranger, and she hadn’t met one she liked in a long time.

She tossed her head to get her god damned hair out of her eyes. It worked, for a second, before the damn curls fell back into place. He watched, not moving, his crossbow at his eye, hiding half his face. She wished she could see it all, as though she might make better judgement on him if she could see it all... in the dark...

_What a stupid thought._

She huffed, annoyed at her self and muttered

“Just out looking for food,” She gestured at the crossbow with her chin. “Don’t want no trouble” The stranger eyed her seriously for a moment before raising the weapon so it pointed at the sky. His face didn’t soften, he looked like the kind of guy who was always pissed. She nodded at him, “Thank you” She whispered, before making to head off on her way.

The breeze lifted her heavy hair and blew it around her face, She wiped at it impatiently and noticed the man with the navy eyes had closed them, his face now serene as he took a deep breath. Taken once again by the pure beauty of him she stopped and just watched his eyes open again as he exhaled. His gaze instantly fell on her eyes and she became a little uncomfortable under that stare.

She swallowed, still holding a fistful of her own hair.

“Ya gotta place?” He asked, and his voice was like gravel and silk all at once. She smiled softly, unsure if she actually had complete control of herself any more,

“No” She answered, gently, “I just have what you see.” She licked her dry cracked lips and looked at him a moment longer. There was something about him she couldn’t put her finger on. It had nothing to do with his unreal beauty, shining out under the dirt on his skin. Something in his eyes, something she could just sense pulling her in. Making her feel safe.

She unfurled her hand from her red waves and held it out to him. “Evie” She said with a smile, wondering exactly what she thought she was doing. He looked at her hand like dog shit, then turned his eyes to her face.

* * *

He was conflicted. Knowing that it was what he was making her so friendly and full of smiles, but not wanting to be lonely any more. It was false, but he needed it right now. He looked up from her hand, his face questioning.

“If you were gonna hurt me, you’d have done so by now” she said, pulling her pale hand away. Buried it in her hair again, a coy gesture he was certain wasn’t genuine. It was so hard to judge people properly when nine times out of ten some unknown force was making them lustful. He was built to draw people in, he worked hard to ensure he didn’t abuse that.

“Daryl” he managed, his voice caught in his chest as the wind threw her scent at him again. He drank it in greedily, and he felt his pulse race. He’d never experienced anything like it. It was as if she were the rain, and he a parched and bleached garden.

Saliva rushed into his mouth as his true colours threatened to show themselves to the pretty woman before him. Her eyes sparkled like a Disney cartoon, a caricature of love. He swallowed hard, and turned his face away from her, licking roughly at his extended canines, hoping she hadn’t seen.

“How many walkers ya killed?” He asked the darkness, voice quiet, though he knew it reached her ears just fine. It was made to. His voice would carry miles if he wanted it too.

He dared a look at her, and she was pulling a face.

“The dead?” she asked, and he nodded, making an odd noise in his throat. A grunt. “I don’t know. Lots.” She shrugged.

“How many People?” He asked then, and she pulled an altogether different face.

“People? what is this?” He shook his head gently at her

“Answer the question, it’s important” She shook her head.

“Do you have a place?” She wondered, hoping the questions were leading somewhere. Daryl fought hard not to roll his eyes. He needed her with him. Insolence now would get him nowhere.

“No, but safety in numbers, I’m better with ya than without. How many people have ya killed?” She shook her head, shrugging again.

“one” She breathed the word, like it pained her to say it out loud, and she closed her eyes. Daryl felt himself lean forward as if he might comfort her. He righted himself quickly, unsure where that feeling came from. He’d never felt that way before. Protective, sure, of his family, but that need to comfort was altogether unexpected.

“Why” he asked, unsure of himself now and where this was leading. She’d end up dead, drained of her life force, if he kept letting that intoxicating smell get to him. If the forces had their way. She opened her eyes and looked at him, held eye contact a heart beat longer than necessary, and there was no lust on her features now. Her face changed, became hard.

“Because she tried to kill my sister, and now they’re both dead, so why the fuck did I bother?” the question was rhetorical, she sighed heavily, crossed her arms so her knife poked out at a ridiculous angle.

“So what now?” She asked him. He glared at her, unsure what to do now.

"I'm lookin' for some'a my friends, my family. We had a place, a prison, not far from here. I reckon they can't'a gone far afta it was blown to shit" He lit up a cigarette, a habit more than a need now, there was nothing going in when he inhaled that shit, but he liked the smell. He noticed her greedy eyes all over the grey whisps of smoke he exhaled, and he offered the crumpled and ripped packet out to her. "Take one'n stop starin'" He gruffed at her as she looked longingly at the cigarettes he offered.

She did so, putting it between her lips and taking the flame he offered. She inhaled deeply and closed her eyes.

"Good GOD that's amazing" she said, and she opened her eyes they landed on his, a dark and intense green he could see perfectly despite the darkness.

Shit, he could see everything despite the darkness. The sheen on her auburn hair, the trickle of sweat gliding down her neck and into her cleavage beneath the tight vest she wore, the wear on her leather pack and leather boots. The smooth area's, from use, on her knife handle.

She blew another cloud of bluish grey smoke into the air and he could hear the quickening of her pulse, which brought with it a new wave of tht heady summer thunderstorm smell.

"C'mon" He grunted, annoyed at himself for getting side tracked by this creature. no one had got to him like this for a while, and did he really trust himself around someone who ould distract him so? "We gotta move"

* * *

He acted like he as annoyed at her, and all she did was bum a smoke from him. What had he said about their camp? blown up?  She snorted and stubbed the dog end into the ground with her well worn booted toe. She must've misheard him. people didn't go blowing up people anymore. That was the old world. She looked up at him, and smiled a little, hell, if he was goning to be annoyed she'd make as light of this shit as she could. There had to be balance. 

He grunted and stormed off, heading roughly north, and she watched a moment before following, an idea in her head that this was crazy and foolish but having no desire to be alone anymore.

She couldn't be alone anymore.


	2. Chapter 2

_He slammed the door behind him, like he always did. Drunk, high, n angry at the world as he was. He wasn't expectin' Merle to be home, but he knew it before the door even shuddered home into its frame._  
_He could smell somethin' outta the ordinary, too, like wet rusty metal._

_"Merle?!" He yelled from the door way, knowin' from the sound that his damned brother was usin' his room for humpin' again. Without a second thought he strode through the shack, and swung his bedroom door open as hard as he'd slammed the front door closed._

_He couldn't tell what he was lookin' at at first. Merle had a girl in there, but had he redecorated? Why the hell was everythin' red? He made to grab Merle by the shoulders n throw him out, but as he reached, Merle turned. His face was a picture. Wide scared eyes, face a red mess, blood, Daryl realised now, dripping from his chin and nose._

_"Merle?" He asked, unsure. He looked at the woman on the bed. She was sprawled at impossible angles, denim mini skirt bunched up around her waist, nothing else on, and covered in her own blood._

_"I din't mean ta do it" Merle had said, whined really, "I din't... I din't mean ta. Daryl?" Daryl looked across at Merle again, kneelin' as he had been between the whore's legs. She was dead. Still vaguely warm, but her eyes were blank and if that was her blood she was all but drained._

_"What the fuck Merle?" Daryl asked, shocked. He never thought his brother would kill a woman, he'd used girls before, shit they both had but this? "Merle she's dead" Merle had nodded slowly_

_"Uh huh, I know. Ya gotta help me boy, if anyone finds out I'll go away again n ya'll be on ya own. Ya gotta help me, I didn't mean for this to happen" Daryl rubbed a hand across his face, with no idea how to handle the situation._

_"People gonna miss her?" He asked, and then threw his hands in the air. What the hell was he asking? There was a dead woman on his bed covered in Merle's DNA. Merle shook his head slowly._

_"Nah, I picked her up down at Saffy's bar, ain't no one gonna miss that Ol' skank." Daryl put his hands in his hair. Hot angry tears, a bi product of the weed, squeezed out of his eyes_

_"Ya gonna get in so much trouble, Merle. What the fuck are we gonna do? What the fuck'm I gonna do without ya?" Merle stood up angrily then, the shock gone from his face now beginning to congeal jelly like with the blood._

_"Quit ya cryin', damn pussy whipped son ovva whore. I ain't goin' nowhere if ya pull ya shit together and ya fingers outta ya'lls ass." He looked down at the womans corpse as though he might spit on her. "C'mon, grab 'er arms, we'll chuck 'er in the truck n take 'er into the depths of the woods." Daryl, now completely sober, watched as Merle grabbed the woman's feet, and bile threatened to rise in his throat. "Don't you throw up on me! I din't raise no coward Daryl" Daryl swallowed it back and grabbed the woman's hands._

_"Ya can't barely even raise ya own damn erection" he retorted, in an effort not to think about what he was doing. Merle laughed heartily after a short pause, and the tension was gone. Just as if this were a normal Dixon brother pastime._

_They hefted the deadweight body on the truck bed, and as they both got in Merle turned to Daryl._

_"Got somethin' ta tell ya Daryl, I don't want ya ta freak on me, ok?" He started the truck up and crept slowly backwards into the road. He began to talk, and Daryl listened intently to his big brother, eyes wide and feelin' confused._

* * *

 

Daryl sat up suddenly. He hadn't been sleeping, he didn't as such, he'd just learned to switch off almost completely. What he'd been seeing wasn't a dream, but a memory captured in his now photographic mind.

They'd camped, if you could call it that, a safe distance from road in a copse of trees. A string of junk Daryl had collected on his travels around them for her safety. He never bothered on his own, he didn't really need to if he stayed alert. He looked over at Evie, curled in a protective ball around herself across from him on the other side of a meagre pile of embers he'd assured her would catch. She didn't talk much. She seemed to be just a mass of red hair on legs. But she continued to draw him in, none the less. She was a complete mystery to him. She neither ran from him, nor fell at his feet, fainting and squealing.

He chewed at his lip, wondering why his mind had fallen upon the time he'd found out that real monsters existed in the world, and that Merle was one of them. He narrowed his eyes and watched Evie breathing deeply in front of him.

She should have run, he thought to himself, looking away. As far and as fast as possible. Now what? He was stuck with her.

She began to stir as the sun rose, bathing them both in the weak morning light of an Autumn day. He wondered what the day would bring, if he'd get any closer to finding his family. Light crept around Evie's head, her hair now glimmering like a golden halo. She made a noise in the back of her throat which rang like bells in his ears. The breeze from last night and died down to a quiet stillness, he was thankful for that. Twice his fangs had descended as if with a will of their own, as the breeze assaulted his senses with her forbidden fruit of a scent. He'd smoked several cigarettes just to fill himself with something other than her. She'd had one more off him, and watching her bring the filtered tip to her cracked, raw lips was torture.

He needed distraction. Food. Maybe something to kill to get him lusting after different flesh. As soon as she woke up, they'd have to hunt.

* * *

Evie felt herself waking up and screwed her eyes tightly closed. When she was asleep she didn't have to worry about trying to survive. Finding food and killing the undead, hiding from other survivors so she wouldn't have to explain who she was and how she'd got to being alone

She groaned, and shifted position as if that might change the situation. It was no hope. She grunted in frustration and threw her eyes open, giving in to the inevitable. She caught the dark stranger from last night seemingly contemplating her with his navy eyes. She fought the intense urge to sit bolt upright and back away from him, but the feeling she should get away was fleeting, and she evened her breathing, which had sped up at the sight of his face, and took a moment to remember.  
His name was Daryl, and he was looking for his family.

"Finally" he grunted, tearing his eyes from her. She felt empty and hollow without him looking at her. She wanted to call him, grab him, and turn him back so she could swim in the depths of the seas that were his eyes.

She snorted, loudly, as she came to her senses. She shook her head gently, smiling, guessing it had just been a while since she'd seen a good looking guy. Swim in his what? She tried to remember when she'd become Shakespeare, and a barely withheld giggle fell from her mouth before she could snap it closed.

"Somethin' funny?" He asked, seeming genuinely intrigued, but she shook her head again, daring to look at him under her lashes. He tossed a bottle with barely a mouthful of water in at her. She sipped at it, straining to keep from necking it too quickly. "We'll go huntin'" he huffed, getting up and beginning to kick dirt over the embers which never did catch in the end.

Well, good morning to you too sunshine, she thought.

She busied herself picking dead leaves and dirt from her hair once she'd packed up her feeble belongings. She watched Daryl putting away the hubcaps and tin cans he'd strung around their sleeping space. He had explained the purpose of it last night, so they'd hear walkers before they got too close. His voice had been like linen, rough but pleasing. He'd lost that angry edge but now it seemed to be back again, and he scowled as he worked. She twirled her curls around her fingers as if to give her damned mane some sort of restraint. She'd considered chopping it all off when she lost her last hair elastic, but hadn't the nerve. She shoved it back over her forehead with a huff and looked at Daryl again.

"I have some tins" she said to him, and he went about his business without looking up. "Could save our energy for the more pressing issue of finding people" but he shook his head, still scowling and not looking at her.

"We'll save the tins for more desperate times. This morning we'll hunt" she stood, nodding slightly, wondering why he was always so moody and shooting a bright smile his way when he finally finished his task. Screw you. She thought to herself. You're not going to bring me down.

But her smile faltered when he stood there in a shaft of morning sunlight, giving her a half smile back. His teeth glistened bright white, and that feeling of doom lay lightly over her again, like a storm cloud, heavy with rain.

* * *

_Not falling apart in sunlight wasn't the first thing that struck him about his new life._

_He lay on top of the come-stained coverlet on his bed, just gazing with new eyes at the crumbling ceiling of the shack. His hand on his chest, his heartbeat strong and vibrant, pulsating his vision with its strength and steady pace._

_"Is this real?" He'd asked Merle in a daze "am I dreaming?" Merle had laughed softly._

_"Yeah, it's real li'l brother, it's awesome." Daryl sat up so quickly his head swam. "Take it easy" Merle mumbled at him. "Don't hurt yaself now" Daryl pulled a face and shook his head gently._

_"My heart's still beatin'" he mused. Merle just nodded_

_"Oh, uh huh. Y'aint dead, boy. Just different. It's not like in the movies, nothin' like it really." He stood up, stretched, and sat next to Daryl on the bed. "Ya heart is still beatin', ya lungs still breathe, ya tastebuds've gone to shit though. Ya c'n eat, sure, it keeps up appearances, but everythin' tastes a bit like... Nothin'. 'Cept blood. " he grinned manically as Daryl looked at him sincerely, his hands gripping the edge of the bed. "Oh n ya first taste is sweeter'n water on a hot ass day. Oooh boy ya got a lot to look forward to." Daryl was intrigued, and the idea of blood sliding down his throat made him feel both sick and excited at once. His mouth watered, and that was unexpected, too. He had a lot to get his head around, but Merle promised he'd be with him, every step of the way._

* * *

 

God damned piece'a shit Merle, Daryl thought as he picked a path very carefully through the knee length grass, trying to find some normal evidence of game. He knew exactly where some rabbits were hiding, underground and barely making a sound to human ears, but to happen on them by accident wasn't going to cut it with Mrs Observant next to him, who was hunting like a mediocre pro. So he searched for scat, footprints, and scratch marks. A difficult task in the grass. If only one of the bunnies would just run across their path....This was going to take a while unless they happened upon a clearing. He contemplated splitting them up so he could just dig down and grab the rodents, but he couldn't bare the thought of her being out of sight, of losing this feeling of wanting and resisting her. It kept him alive, he believed it kept him grounded.

He knew it was risky, being so attracted someone, especially when he remembered the first time since his change.


	3. Chapter 3

Evie puffed out a breath of air in a short sharp burst. As she did so Daryl looked at her sideways, apparently annoyed. She rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue out at his back.  
They were never going to find anything in the long grass. She couldn't see even a scrap of evidence that anything had been there. She contemplated splitting off, creeping around with Daryl in long grass wasn't getting them anywhere and she was starting to get really hungry, that and his temper seemed to be rubbing off on her. She suddenly felt very moody herself. No matter how long she thought about it, though, no matter the excuses, she couldn't seem to go.  
She tapped the blade of her knife against her thigh as they made painstakingly slow progress. Again Daryl turned and looked at her, face like thunder, eyes narrowed to slits, lank and greasy bangs surely obscuring his vision. She smiled at him,

"I still have canned potatoes" she said around that grin, knowing full well it might wind him up further. Sure enough He narrowed his eyes a little more at her.

"Ain't gone need 'em" he said quietly, nodding at something ahead of them. She squinted ahead, seeing nothing but metre after metre of long grass just waiting to dampen her legs ever more as the dew struggled to dry in the weak autumn sun.

"What?!" She asked, with an air of irritation. "There's nothing but grass, the only track in it is ours!" Daryl just smirked at her, infuriating her more.  
She sighed heavily. It was as if the tables had completely turned, he was smiling, she was monumentally pissed.

* * *

 

Her breath ran hot, her pulse raced and her skin flushed with colour as her blood surfaced. Daryl felt himself smiling as she got more and more irritated, enjoying the way she looked, smelled, the rushing of her pulse audible in his ears. He bit at his lip as his mouth watered.

He needed to eat, soon, losing control wasn't an option. Not this time.

_~~~~~~~_

_They were at a Titty bar in some backwards town they were passing through. Waitresses, whores, and needy drug addicted girls were both avoiding them and drawn to them in equal measure. It seemed to Daryl it was the bad girl's that hung around, the dirty ones, the ones who'd let ya ass fuck 'em bareback for a hit of whatever you were peddalin' that day._  
_It was 2pm and the place was half full. Despite the strength of the light outside the bar was still dingy, grim, with dark corners where couples were all but fuckin' out in the open._  
_A waitress, who called herself LouAnn (Daryl was sure as shit she was a big city girl who'd fallen foul of sex and drugs, and called herself LouAnn to fit in with the local yokels) was all over him, pushing her bare tits in his direction with every order she took. The bar had a no touchin' policy, n Daryl, Normally shy around women, was findin' it hard to resist. He was still new to the vampire thing, and his senses were as wide open as they could be. LouAnn smelled like the sunrise, all pink n orange n bright. Her eyes were the darkest and most sultry brown. He had no doubt it was the essence of danger around him n Merle that attracted her, but he couldn't ask, Merle was busy with two crack whores, n Daryl surprised himself by askin' her when she got off work._

~~~~~~~

The pull from Evie was even stronger, but now a few years in, he had an easier time resisting.  
She was frustrated, hungry and tired. He could tell with a simple sideways glance at her stern face and the heavier steps she was now taking. Stomping along like an elephant beside him as they neared the animal hole he'd spotted in the distance. The one her eyes couldn't yet see.

He was still smirking to himself when he sensed the walkers. They weren't close, but they were around. The rotten flesh smell assaulted his olfactory senses hard, and his ears picked up the dragging sound of their stumbling gait. His body shifted to high alert in a fraction of a second and Evie seemed to notice the change, as his hands and arms tensed up on his bow, her hand squeezed her knife handle, no longer tapping against her leg but held firm and stable.

She looked at him and cocked an eye brow. He put a finger to his lips and hushed her before she made a single sound. If she wasn't scared she'd be more irritated by that simple gesture, but there was no time to be worried about that.

He moved them on slowly and steadily, stepping lighter through the undergrowth. Evie followed suit, hardly daring to breathe as she strained to see or hear what he had. She'd picked up the change in him so quickly, he was pleased for that much. Despite everything he knew was conflicting inside her mind about him, she at least had the sense to trust his instinct.

* * *

 

Evie struggled with a shudder as Daryl stiffened. The atmosphere went from prickly to intense and he swung his crossbow up so fast all she saw was a blur of movement. She was confused, and she was suddenly scared. What had he seen or heard? He wasn't saying anything. People, walkers? It wasn't food, that much was certain.

She tried to loosen her grip on her knife and failed. She thought about the gun in her pack with just three bullets left. The one she'd vowed to use on herself if she ever got bitten. The one she'd vowed to use on anyone else if they needed it. That was all it was good for, her suicide pact, it was too noisy to use for anything else.

She looked at Daryl, all but floating along in the grass silently. She wondered how such a big guy could move so fluidly, and so fast, when she heard the moan to her left.  
There, behind a tree, a lurker. Not so much moving but just waiting for its feed to stumble across it.

She held her breath, having never got used to the smell, and a bolt appeared speared perfectly between its eyes. She turned to face Daryl, amazed at his aim, as he moved forward to retrieve his ammo, but she noticed then that they were surrounded by the beasts. Daryl stopped moving, and she felt herself stiffen in fear. She willed herself to move but she couldn't.

They'd walked right into the middle of a herd on the move. Panic rising she looked to Daryl for some sort of help, but he just gave her a tiny nod, and pulled a knife from his belt. The movement attracted the attention of the closest walkers, and they turned, groaning and reaching for him. He dodged the arms of the nearest and it stumbled, he stabbed a second through the eye and kicked at a third to keep it away while he retrieved his weapon. Evie watched, awestruck and still frozen, he moved in a blur of colour, so fast and so light that she could barely keep up.

She descended on the roamer he'd kicked to the side and stabbed it through the back of the head, her knife slid through with ease, a feeling she was sure would never feel right, and the walker tumbled like a stone to the floor. She swallowed back the urge to vomit, and turned to the next,  
as more and more walkers turned their attention to the pair. Moving as fast as she could, but not with Daryl's speed, she downed what she could as he put her to shame dancing and killing. She was out of breath, she was still hungry, and her empty stomach was trying to turn itself inside out as she became more and more covered in the blood and guts of their prey.

Thinking they were finally done a few minutes later, she folded her body forward and rested her palms on her thighs, spitting into the long grass and trying desperately not to throw up. She took a shuddering breath and looked up to find Daryl watching her, less than half a foot away and smirking a little. He was completely composed. She eyeballed him and spat onto the dirt again, wondering how he could move like that, and not be in a mess like she was.

She went to ask him exactly that, curious and furious at once, when his face changed, and something grabbed, pulling hard, at her hair. Her head flew back and down, and she yelped, as she looked into the face of the roamer who had pulled at her. Her neck was stretched, exposed, and the walker was already bearing its teeth, mouth dripping with jelly-like congealed blood. She fumbled uselessly at her waistband for the knife she'd actually dropped in shock.

Daryl appeared, and swung his arm between the walker and Evie's neck, and she watched, devastated, as the Roamer's teeth sank into Daryl's flesh instead of hers. She screamed as Daryl brought a bolt up into the side of the walkers head and it let him go, hitting the ground like a sack of shit. Letting go of her hair, mouth still hanging open. She reached for Daryl, a jumble of noises escaping her as she sobbed, but Daryl was gone.

She caught her breath and stood up straight, rubbing the back of her neck which hurt like a bitch. She span 360 degrees, green eyes wide and senseless noises still coming out of her with each breath.

Daryl was no where to be seen.

She stopped turning, senseless noises stopped coming out of her. She retrieved her knife from the floor and stood again. Daryl had been bitten, had he run off to die alone, like an animal? He shouldn't be alone. She turned again, looking behind her.

"Daryl?" She called in a stage whisper, unsure which way he had gone. She looked down at the walker which had nearly ended her life, wondered at how it had fallen and the direction Daryl had likely travelled in. She checked the grass, but it was no hope, walkers had been all around them and picking a particular track was beyond her capabilities. She sighed heavily, and just headed in the direction her instincts pulled in.


	4. Chapter 4

Daryl hoped he'd been fast enough that she hadn't seen the walker bite him.

He sat, not far away, keeping an ear out for her, hoping if she carried on she'd go the other way and he could catch up.

He looked down at the gaping hole in his arm, the wound slowly healing, the muscle regenerating, the veins re attaching. He wondered, not for the first time, how he could move so fast yet his body was so slow. He wondered if there was a finite number of bites he could contract before they started having an effect on him.  
He'd had a few already.

Out in the woods, out on runs, just out for a moment's peace. He'd always been alone before, he'd never been bitten with anyone but Merle in tow. He didn't have to hide from Merle.

Blood had stopped flowing from the wound, now if the skin would fuse he could catch back up to Evie, and batter off her questions with explanations of shock and fear. He needed to get back to her and keep her safe, but she didn't need to see this.

He sighed frustrated, with nothing he could do but wait for the process to finish.

He contemplated that need to keep her safe again. She was a stranger, a means to an end. Another lost soul just to keep loneliness and madness at bay. To help him find his family.  

But she was more than that, just a day in she was already more. She was the only red head he'd met whose hair shone like new copper. Like the sun, like sunrise. The only woman whose sweet breath could make him want to roll over in submission just to be breathed on forever.

He shook that thought away. He felt pathetic, and if he couldn't get complete control of himself...

He heard her call his name, closer now than the first time. He looked down at his arm, almost there. If only he didn't rip the sleeves from every shirt he owned.

"Down here" he called to her roughly, as she rounded the huge tree he lounged against.

If it could do so, his heart would have broken at the sight of her face.

* * *

 

Breathless she followed the sound of his voice. Did he sound broken? Hurt? She rounded the huge tree trunk, expecting the worst, and finding him on the floor, assumed that he was dying.

She collapsed beside him in an instant, put her hands either side of his face and looked him in the eyes. He didn't pull away, but his skin was warm to the touch, perhaps too warm.

"Oh," she managed, her mouth remaining in the O shape, her eyes worried and frantically searching him for damage.

He grabbed at her hands, gripped her wrists firmly and glared at her.

"Evie, enough" he grunted, tearing his eyes away from hers. "I'm ok" She was thankful he looked away, she felt hypnotised by him.

"You were bitten" she managed quiet but rushed, and tried to pull her hands from his wrists. She wanted to see his arm for herself, but he wouldn't let her go. He tried to hold her still, and he squeezed at her wrists. He looked at her again, and his lips parted in a sneer.

"You're hurting me" she said, his hands were like fire, molten handcuffs holding her still. She looked at his face again, and shrank her body away at the sight of him. He was baring his teeth, his eyes were hard and cold.

"Ya scared of me?" He asked her, and his voice was somehow like razor blades, assaulting her ears with sharp pain. But she shook her head, now sitting back on her haunches.

"No" she whispered, wondering at her own thoughts and feelings in that moment. Should she be? She wasn't, she was worried he might die, assuming the sneer of pain was some kind of coping mechanism, as if Daryl really were an animal who should be alone to die. Like a fox, or a wolf " _For_ you" she managed in that same quiet tone.

* * *

 

It was taking everything he could muster not to hiss at her, not to show her his gleaming white fangs before burying them into her wrist. Slicing into one of the arteries he could feel under his fingers, throbbing away and practically calling his name. He could almost see it happening.

He took a deep breath and held it, letting her arms go. She rubbed at her wrists, her hands flushing pink as the blood found its way back around her body. He hadn't realised just how tight he was holding her. She would be bruised by the afternoon.

He contemplated honesty as she searched his face for some explanation of what was going on here. Her dark emerald eyes worried and concerned, she still hunted for some mark or scar which she wouldn't find.

He let out the breath he held in a long sigh. He was hungrier now, the regeneration had zapped his energy and he needed to find blood, any blood, before he betrayed his own oath to himself and devoured Evie.

Of course, it wouldn't matter. No one would be looking for her in this world of the undead. No one would miss her, and none of his family, who he would find, even knew she existed.

He shook his head and put his hands to it, burying his fingers in his hair and curling them to fists. Assuming he was in pain Evie's hand reached out and touched his bicep, when he looked up her soft and delicate fingers fell away, though more like a leaf from a tree, than a rabbit darting from the fox.

"Well ya should be scared of me" he grunted at her, tearing his eyes away once more. "I'm no good for ya, I'm dangerous" she looked at him, eyebrows knitted together in a frown.

"I think maybe you have a fever and need some water" she said very carefully. He shook his head at her, becoming angry again.

"No, I weren't bit!" He thrust his arms at her sharply and she lost her balance, falling back on her ass. She scowled at him, his arms still out, both perfectly clean and free of even so much as a bruise. When he didn't offer to help her up she clambered back to her toes, then knelt in front of him and gently checked each arm.  
She took them in her soft hands and turned them over gently. She found nothing.

"But.." She frowned again, letting his arms drop. She didn't continue.

* * *

 

She couldn't continue.

I saw it with my own eyes, she thought, confused. She put her hands on her knees, looking at the floor. She still had a crick in her neck, Pain left over from the walker dragging her down. It really happened.

She looked at her hands, as if perhaps they too were figments of her imagination.

"So why did you run?" She asked quietly still looking at her hands resting on her knees. And why should I be scared of you? She didn't ask.

She'd had the feeling she should be, at least a little wary of him, but she wasn't. She couldn't force it. She ran a hand through her hair and looked up at him as it tangled in the curls. He hadn't answered her question, and now he was staring at her intently.

She stared back a moment, then narrowed her eyes and waved a hand at him dismissively

"You're very intense" she said casually. "I think you need to lighten up"  She stood up and looked down at him. Fed up with his brooding and dark attitude. "It was all very fast, maybe I was mistaken" she shrugged and strode away, back in the direction they had started in.

If he didn't want to talk, fine. She knew something had happened, but she couldn't take him being so tightly wound. Life was too short to go chasing for answers, so he wasn't bit, great, let's go and get some breakfast.

* * *

 

He listened to her getting farther away, cursing at himself. It was the perfect moment to say something, anything, and he'd blown it. He chewed at his lip a little, then swiftly stood and jogged to catch up with her. She turned to him slightly as he approached, a small smile threatening on her face.

"Hey" she said, facing front again. Her voice was tight, and he found himself smirking, despite everything they'd just been through.

Eventually they found food. The rabbit hole he'd spotted way in the distance was soon just a few feet away, and they watched it for a while, Daryl knew there were rabbits in there. It was just a waiting game.

Crouching in the undergrowth, close together and almost touching, Daryl could feel her body vibrating. It was putting her on edge to be so close, but he still didn't sense any fear.

She breathed slowly, calmly, her pulse wasn't raised, there was a sense of something around her, but he couldn't work it out.

"Why did you run?"  She asked again, a soft and delicate whisper, her breath pushing past him in a wave of that dewy scent, like dandelion seeds on a summer breeze. He breathed it in, long and deep breath. The smell grew within him, like a blooming flower.  
He opened his eyes and she was glaring him.

"Are you ok?" She queried, more sarcastic than concerned. He didn't answer straight away, just took a moment to look at her.

The sun was high, but they were huddled in the shadows together. Still her hair shone like it was lit from within.

"Why are you nervous?" He whispered, and her brows knitted closer together. She leaned forward and whispered even softer than he though possible directly into his ear

"Why are you answering my questions with questions?" A shiver coursed through him and he leaned away, not sure he could trust himself in such close proximity, her warm breath moving the hairs by his ear, the feeling on his skin like silk.

It was then they were interrupted by a rabbit finally poking its nose out of its burrow, and just seconds later he was striding towards it, glad to have food, even more thankful to be away from Evie to get himself together again, after being so very close to falling apart.

Another bunny went to bolt out of the darkness of the warren, and without thinking, trying in fact not to think, Daryl caught it in his bare hands and broke its neck.

"Woah" he heard close behind him, closer than expected. She'd crept up on him. "Great catch!" He turned with the limp rabbit in his hand and tossed it at her, she caught it and held it by its back legs, she looked a little cautious of it, squeamish, so his next suggestion was not going to go down well.

"Ya get more'a the goodness outta them if ya eat em raw" he called as she turned away, the thought was making his mouth water and he knew his pupils would be dilated. Maybe it was good she'd headed back to their hiding spot again. In the shade the subtle changes in him would be less noticeable.

Except the teeth. He wasn't sure how he'd hide those in such close quarters. Rick and the others were used to him liking his time alone, Evie seemed to want to be next to him, at all times.

She turned back to him, rabbit at arms length, face screwed up.

"Raw!?" He nodded, approaching her now, a Small smirk on his face.

"Yup. It's better, more energy. Just close your eyes and breath through your mouth" she eyeballed her breakfast suspiciously as Daryl sat on the ground and began cutting into his.

Watching her eat raw meat was more torturous than he thought possible. He found himself staring, then turning away as she sucked on her bloody fingers.

"It's better than I thought" she said sounding surprised as she slowly licked at a dribble of blood running down her palm. Daryl screwed his eyes firmly closed and tried not to register the mingled and delightful aroma of her mixed with blood.

He tried not to watch as she popped a kidney I'm her mouth and red juice ran down her chin.

"It's sticky" she said around a mouthful of offal, and he turned his back on her completely, his teeth extended, his heart speeding along, his erection straining against his jeans. He was embarrassed, scared, and desperately trying to think of anything else.

~~~~~~~

_Merle taught him about eating raw meat,_

_"Ain't as good as human, but it's good. A burger against a steak, ya know?" Daryl watched as Merle buried his knife into the soft belly of a squirrel._

_The smell was delicious, but nothing like the smell of human blood._

_"Here, try it. It's even better than it was when you were human, it'll really get ya goin'" tentatively Daryl dipped his large fingers into the animal and pulled out its heart._

_Suddenly everything came into sharp focus, the sounds sights and smells around him burst into life almost like they had on his first taste of human, and he knew then that this would be enough, he could survive on the raw meat of the woods, and he wouldn't have to hunt a human ever again._


	5. Chapter 5

_~~~~~~~_

_She whispered throatily that she got off at midnight, but actually had a break in twenty minutes, and left with a wink and a smile. He let his eyes follow her away, his pulse thundered along, and he worried everyone else in the vicinity could hear it. Merle clocked the look on his face and eyeballed him carefully around the blonde on his lap._   
_"Y'ok lil bro?" He queried, slapping the woman on the ass as he did so. Daryl nodded, tearing his eyes from the waitress LouAnn, he fiddled with a cigarette, tapping it on the table, and nodded again, looking a little smug._

~~~~~~~

  
Daryl shook himself to. Night was was coming on them quickly, and they'd moved from the forest to the road in the hope of finding somewhere better to stay. Evie was disheartened by the lack of houses. Daryl struggled not to say 'I told you so' having argued the cover of the woods as better for them both.

"We both nearly died" she'd huffed at him, sauntering off in the rough direction of the road. It was enough to quiet him, he couldn't have an episode like that again. He'd need to be much more careful around her.

No more raw rabbit either. The memory of her eating, the blood dripping down her pale skin in his minds eye, the juxtaposition of deep claret and pale peach.  
He cleared his throat, as if it might clear his head, aand she looked behind her at him, as though the noise was to get her attention.

"If I want you I'll whistle" he said, rougher than he meant to, and Evie scowled at him before turning away again. He breathed a quiet sigh, and rubbed at his mouth. He was so much better with women at the beginning of his transition.

He put his hand down from his face. He was an awkward mess before, and now he was struggling again. He just wanted his family back, to be around people he was completely comfortable with.

* * *

Evie kept half an eye on the trees to her left, hoping there'd be a break, that they'd find some 'wide place in the road' town where they could crash. She was beginning to forget what having four walls and a roof could be like. Safe, a home even just for a few hours. Sleeping in the dirt was getting old quickly, and despite the strings of junk Daryl made, it never felt safe. Four walls and a roof, just for a night, maybe two. Long enough to really refresh before they set off on whatever journey Daryl had planned.

It was good, having a target. She'd been alone for weeks and was struggling hard. She was constantly on edge, hungry, sleeping in abandoned cars and at one point in the branches of an old oak just to be out of roamer's reach. Alone was dangerous. Taking sleep shifts with someone was better. Though, she couldn't remember taking shift with Daryl. She felt her face frown as she walked, checking a gap in the trees for signs of buildings, in fact, she definitely hadn't spent a single waking hour in darkness. She stopped walking, deep in thought. Did he trust his stupid pieces of trash to keep them safe? He must sleep. Granted he looked monumentally tired but she'd figured that was just his face. Weather worn and stress related. No one could survive without sleep. She'd heard it could kill you quicker than going without food.  
She pushed her hair from her face and let out an exasperated sigh, confused and concerned. Daryl caught up to her and stopped beside her, looking for a reason why they were no longer walking.

"It's getting dark" she said as if he wouldn't have noticed, and he looked up at the stars just beginning to glimmer in the greeny blue sky you always seem to get just after the oranges and pinks of sunset have past.

"We'll find a place" he said quietly as if to himself, as though he'd read her mind. She opened her mouth to speak, apologise for being shitty, thank him, anything to get a conversation going, but for no reason she could see, he grabbed his crossbow, threw it to his face, and span on the spot so he was facing behind them.  
Then she heard a man chuckling, almost to himself. It was a dark sound, heavy and deep, and it put Daryl's hackles up. _Now_ she wanted to run, as far and as fast as possible, but Daryl stood firm and slowly she turned to face the very thing her whole body was telling her was dangerous.

* * *

 

Daryl knew he had two choices the instant he turned to find these men pointing their weapons at he and Evie. Kill them all, which was doable but would affect Evie in ways he dared not think about, or go with them.

Both were non choices really. He could tell these men were dangerous. The smell alone emanating from them was black, tar like, asphalt melting in the height of summer.

"I claim his jacket" one said as Evie slowly turned to them.

"Pfffft I claim the girl" another said excitedly as she came face to face with them. The hairs on his body all stood on end at the words, and the fear coming from Evie now was what he expected at her first sight of him, but which didn't come. At least now he knew she was capable of that fear.

"Hold up fellas" a guy with grey/white hair said. The only one not holding a weapon to their heads. Daryl eyeballed him, his crossbow pointed at this guy, the leader's, forehead.  
One of the men surrounding them shuffled his feet and made a noise I the back of throat.

"C'mon man, The red head?" Another began to answer.

"Red pussy's still pussy"

"Hold. On" the leader said again, eyes not moving from Daryl's. Evie was all but vibrating beside him, and it took a lot for him not to turn to her. "A bowman" their leader said "now, I respect that. See, a guy with a rifle, he coulda been anyone before, but a bowman's a bowman, through and through" he smiled and Daryl bristled. His voice was gravel and dirt and that was about where Daryl had decided he belonged. The man pointed at Daryl,

"Now what you got there, been looking for a weapon like that. Although," he chuckled "I'd prefer a little more ammo and a little less oblongata stains" he chuckled again and the guy with the compound bow, who had wanted Daryl's vest, who had too long greasy curls and eyes like mud, spoke very purposely to Evie.

"That means brains" there was a leer to his voice Daryl didn't care for. He then turned to Daryl who had stiffened beyond just being angry and focused. He was set to kick all their asses. "Get ya self in some trouble boy?" All the minions laughed. Daryl didn't move, he kept his eyes on their leader.

"Let's calm down" the grey haired head honcho said serenely. "You pull that trigger, ya girl's gonna be in a world of hurt, and the boys'll make ya watch before they put ya outta ya misery. That what you want" he cocked an eyebrow, and Daryl snuck a look back at Evie, all pale and fearful, her knife tight in her fist, her eyes gleaming and scared. She shot them on his for a second, and the grey haired leader continued talking.

"C'mon son, suicide is stupid." Daryl rubbed his chin on his shoulder, and Began to lower his weapon. He felt Evie relax a little beside him, and hoped it wasn't too soon. With his weapon down everyone else lowered theirs, and the leader smiled a terrifying smile. "Name's Joe" he said, and clapped Daryl on the shoulder.

* * *

 

If Daryl had told her that he'd felt her relax, Evie would have been more than a little Surprised. She didn't feel relaxed. Less on edge without a team of bows and rifles in her face, sure, but relaxed? She was still on her toes, like she might fly at any second.

"Daryl" he said after Joe introduced himself. "Girl's Evie" she grimaced, she could speak for herself. Joe nodded at her and The greasy prick with the bow and curly hair moved forward.

"The girl yours?" He asked Daryl and Evie rolled her eyes.

"No, I don't belong to anyone, he doesn't speak for me. I have my own voice. Thank you" Who wore that much denim all at once anyway? She could feel the waves of resentment coming off all of them, hear the cogs in their heads trying to calculate if there was enough to go round. She might not be much, a red mop on legs, but she'd not go down without a fight.

"Well, ain't you a feisty bitch" the greasy guy said sullenly, shrinking back into the crowd of his comrades. She smiled to herself, maybe these guys weren't so tough.

They moved on, now as a team of 8. Evie kept her eyes on the men around her, worried she'd put their backs up a little too much. Daryl elbowed her lightly as they walked,

"Ya keep ya head down, ya eyes open, n ya mouth shut from now on, y'hear? I know guys like this, ya'll just wind 'em up" she puffed out a breath and looked at Daryl, his dark blue eyes as narrow as ever, and shrugged. What did it matter?

"Good" she spat, and Daryl leant away from her. She eyeballed him as stern as she dare. "I'm not going to take any shit Daryl, not from them and not from you. I know we don't have to be with them, I know you could have done them all over. So why're we here?" Daryl studied her a moment, his sapphire eyes boring into hers so hard she had to fight to stand firm and stare right back. He was close enough for her to feel the heat that poured off him, and she could see the pulse in his neck. It was a fight not to reach out and touch him, let alone glare right back at him and stand her ground.

"Eyes open, mouth shut" he said quietly, and all she could do was nod at him. What did he care? They were strangers in a strange world who just happened to find each other on a cool night in Georgia, a rarity in itself. She was intrigued by him, his speed, his weird disappearance after their run in with walkers, his apparent ability to never sleep, but that was all. He was beautiful, whichever angle she tried he was completely astounding, but she still didn't know him. Not yet. The thought never crossed her mind that she wouldn't. Of course she wanted to.

He made her feel safe, and regardless of what happened after, he saved her life.

They walked on, no clue where they were going or if they could still find Daryl's family now that they had new, bad, company.


	6. Chapter 6

_~~~~~~~_

_"You take it easy, li'l brother." Merle's eyes were serious, his face deadpan. It was a rare sight, that light in his baby blues goin' out. "I know ya horny, hoo wee do I know it. But you go easy on that girl. Play ya cards right it's a free meal, get enough wrong, well, I can't promise I won't say I told ya so. Y'here me? You go lightly" Daryl nodded at Merle, one single affirmative dip of his head as he grabbed the truck keys and headed out to the Parkin' lot of the dive bar. Merle was already back to bein' a horn dog himself score Daryl'd even opened the door._

_~~~~~~~_

* * *

 

Evie was rudely awakened by Daryl's boot shucking gently into her ribs, and that wasn't even the worst of it. She was thinking the whole gang of denim clad greasers was a dream, but she awoke abruptly to find herself surrounded by men she barely recognised. It was still dark, and the stars were still clearly visible above her, until Daryl's head popped into view.

"Goin' huntin'" he whispered "c'mon" one of the greasers was snoring, a honking noise she was surprised hadn't bought walkers their way.

She sat up and rubbed at her face, wondering at Daryl's glow so early in the morning. The ethereal essence of him. She tried to say good morning, but all that came out was a barely audible grunt. She was not a morning person. Daryl looked at her sideways, and she managed a sneer, which was supposed to be a sarcastic smile, as she got up and followed him, ducking under the string of junk that these new guys also deemed enough to keep them safe.

"What're we gonna find in the dark?"  
She asked, stifling a yawn with the back of her hand. Daryl shot her another sideways glance before answering.

"Rabbits're nocturnal" he said, then put his finger to his lips and silently shushed her. She stood a little straighter, indignant, but kept quiet. They needed to eat, and he could hunt like nobody's business. She was also pleased to be away from the others, it was enough for her not to snap back at him for the gesture.

* * *

 

Daryl felt her bristling as he drew his finger away from his lips. All the hairs on his body stood on end as he awaited the backlash, but nothing came. She was out here with him because he didn't trust those pricks with her alone. She must have known that.

The thought in itself made him feel sick and set his teeth on edge, drooling for their blood despite knowing that it would taste as bad as the stink that surrounded them. He grimaced at the thought, as Evie snuck a glance at him.

He wondered, not for the first time, what she had meant when she said she knew he could have done all the members of the gang in. Had he been so careless that she knew something wasn't right with him? He thought he'd managed to stave off the queries over the walker bite, and he'd been careful turn away whenever the compelling feeling to show her exactly who she was surfaced.

But the dead were getting up again, it wasn't such a giant leap for an inquisitive mind to wonder about other monsters.  
No one else did, though. His people just let him be.

He was chewing his lip thoughtfully, mind going a hundred miles an hour, eyes everywhere following the faint track of a meal, when she spoke again, almost making him jump.

"What are your people like?" She whispered, and he stopped dead where he was.  
What were they like? What a question.

"They're safe. They're home." He said quietly. "There's 12 of us, or at least, there were. They're good people" Evie nodded to herself, watching as the sky began to lighten ahead of them, where behind them it was still almost black.

"Will they accept me?" She wondered as if to herself, and Daryl continued walking. She followed, not really expecting an answer.

"They'll have to" he said, matter of factly. "You and me come as a team now." He chewed at the inside of his cheek, wondering if he meant what he'd said. Did they? Could they? They were still strangers.

"There!" She said suddenly, as the rabbit they were following erupted from some undergrowth and bolted into the open. Daryl lined up to shoot, but as fast as he was, he wasn't quick enough to beat Len's arrow.

* * *

 

Evie was surprised, she didn't know they were being followed. Did Daryl? He'd been open enough about his group, so perhaps not.

"Claimed!" She heard behind her, and she span to see Len grinning like a Cheshire Cat, large, but leering more than with humour.

"That rabbit's ours" she said as he strode between them to claim his prize. "Hey!" She called, frustrated at being ignored "you hear me?"

"What d'ya think ya doin'?" Daryl asked, voice calm but his back well and truly up. "Been trackin' that damn rodent all Mornin'" Len collected his rabbit and swung it up by its ears.

"Rules'a the hunt ain't worth shit here boy" Evie watched Daryl, and the word boy really seemed to get him going. His eyes glistened in rage and the air between the three of them seemed to hiss with static energy.

On edge, she drew her knife and held it firm, she had a feeling something big was about to happen, and damned if she was going to die, or lose Daryl, over a stupid rabbit.

"Cottontail's mine" Len said with conviction. "Claimed 'im. Dint hear you do the same" Evie was confused, but didn't have time to ponder that as Daryl burst forward in a blur, grabbing Len by the jacket and throwing him hard enough against a tree that Evie heard either bark or bones cracking.

"If I didn't know better," Len didn't seem to know when to give in "I'd say it was a girl got ya riled up" he sneered at Evie "But ya got a piece of ass right there" Daryl's fist came back behind his ear and Evie darted forward to grab Daryl's arm. It was vibrating with energy, and she could feel the heat beneath his jacket.

"Stop!" She yelled, worried Daryl was about to make things worse. She yanked at him, but he was solid as a rock under her hands.

"Unless she ain't ya type" Len huskily continued "what? Huh? Wrong sex? Too old?" Daryl's fist flew forward and Evie was knocked back into her butt in the damp dewy grass.

With his mouth bloody, all but spitting teeth, Len was still grinning.

"I see" he said. "Littluns ya thing?" Daryl grunted and his arm came back again. Evie all but screamed his name and he appeared to come to his senses, slowly lowering his arm in stages. She stood and took his arm again, and this time he felt it, turning and looking at her like he hadn't realised she was there.

* * *

 

"Fellas, c'mon now" the leader, Joe, was back. His timing couldn't be worse.

Daryl was between two worlds right now, one where he could happily drain Len dry right here in the open, and another where Evie was all he saw, all that mattered.

She was watching him with wide eyes, still not scared, looking into him, like she was trying to get the measure of him through his eyes.

But Joe was demanding his attention, and he managed to tear his eyes away from the pull of Evie's at length.

"Why don't we get to the bottom of what the issue really is here" Daryl was stunned, he moved forward towards Joe about to speak. Len had half his face knocked off and Joe was calm as a cucumber.

"This is bullshit" he spat, turning away and grabbing Evie by the arm. He dragged her away from the others, back toward their pathetic camp. He was fully aware of how tight her held her bicep, but couldn't stop himself. "We're gettin' our stuff n we're leavin'" he growled through gritted teeth.  
Evie didn't make a sound, just tried to keep up so she wasn't dragged too roughly.

"Goin' it alone ain't an option, Dare" Joe called after them "c'mon partner we c'n sort this out"

* * *

 

They were back at camp, throwing their shit together in their packs, Evie double checking nothing had been taken. Her gun was there, bottle of water and a couple tins of food. Her spare clothes, extra underwear a screw driver and some rusty metal shaped into a point. She sighed at how depressing it was that all she owned was this, and how it fit snuggly on her back, then threw the pack over her shoulders.  
Daryl was winding up his string when Joe and Len reappeared.

"There's just a few simple rules to keep our band of men together" Joe said after he'd ducked under the ropes, "ain't gotta be this way"

"Well, we ain't stayin'" Daryl  
Shot back without looking up. Evie could feel the heat pouring off him beside her, wondered how he managed to run at such a temperature without going red or sweating. She looked at Joe, who was about to speak again.

"I think we've made it clear" she said, but Joe ignored her.

"Ya gonna leave, go it alone over a damned rabbit? That's suicide!" Daryl stopped fiddling, stood straight and looked Joe in the eye.

"Ain't alone. I got Evie." To her surprise Joe seemed to shrink under Daryl's stare. Daryl's voice had turned hypnotic, and he did seem to stand taller, straighter.

"Your loss" Joe said quietly, and Daryl huffed a short laugh at him.

"Yeah, we'll see" he turned and exited the camp, and Evie followed. When she chanced a look back, the gang were just watching them, shocked and quiet.

She had to jog to keep up with Daryl's purposeful stride. Breathless, with her pack banging at her shoulder blades, she strode along beside him.

"Now what?!" She cried as they left the gang behind in a rush.

"We carry on" he said without breaking pace.

"What if they come after us?" She was astounded he could be so stupid, as to punch one of those greasers and just leave.

"Don't you think this world is dangerous enough?!" He huffed a laugh, a humourless 'huh' she barely heard but could feel and see in the movement of his shoulders. "You think it's funny?"

She stopped trying to keep up, stood stock still and watch him take another step or two before he did the same. He turned to her slowly, and she waited with baited breath. Though he didn't look at her, she knew his eyes were sparkling, lit from within by whatever force made him so fast and so able, so light on his feet.

Slowly, painfully slowly, he looked up, and as he finally caught her in his gaze her breath caught audibly in her throat. His eyes were like fire.

"You have no idea" he said darkly, then turned and continued walking towards the rising sun.

She didn't follow immediately. For a moment she couldn't move at all.  
His eyes had literally been aflame.  
What the hell was going on?

She shook her head, shook herself off, and began to follow at her own pace, straight towards the east, directly into the sun.


	7. Chapter 7

_He lit his cigarette, feigning ignoring her as she coyly sauntered towards him._    

  _She was fully dressed now, her previously exposed fake breasts under a thin layer of material that may have well been designed with a child in mind._     

_He began to have doubts as she smiled at him. Fake tits, fake name, clothes leavin' nothin' to the imagination. This wasn't like him, n she weren't really his type. He looked at her, n she bit her lip, n god dammit type went right outta the window as he was led instead by his dick n his damned impulses._

_~~~~~~~_

They hadn't eaten in 24 hours, and it was startin' to show. Evie was moody and unyielding, and Daryl was beginning to see in greys, the colour draining from the world, a sure sign he was hungry. The hunter came out, and the greys he assumed helped him see better in the dark, when prey was likely to cross his path.

The scent of Evie was overpowering now, as well. The strength of it irritated him as it made it harder for him to resist just sinking his teeth into her neck, or even better, the femoral artery in her groin, right where her scent would be strongest.  His mouth watered, he swallowed it down and kept his eyes all around him for danger. He was sure that Joe and his band of men were following them, whether by luck or judgement he wasn't yet sure, but they were there, as were the faint whiffs of their tarry black odour on the light breeze. 

He didn't tell Evie. He couldn't. She was ignoring him, sulking in her own blackness of their predicament. She stomped, she didn't realise she was doing it, and neither would anyone else, but the animals knew, they could feel it, and she was half the reason they'd been so unlucky. the lack of food was half the reason she was stomping. All these halves, and still no one felt whole.

Again she'd offered her tins of food, potatoes and pasta. Food he could eat, but which wouldn't sustain him. How could he tell her to break open the cans, and then refuse to eat what she offered him? Food would be wasted. The cans were better left until he was satisfied with blood, and could at least pretend to enjoy the human food she gave him.

This was getting so damn complicated.

A rustling behind them stopped him in his tracks, and he listened hard as Evie continued to stomp away. The sound wasn't animal, it was almost purposeful, then he smelled the vile perfume, but it was too late, he'd already been outwitted.

* * *

 

Evie was completely unaware of what Daryl had noticed. She neither heard nor sensed the approaching greasers, who stealthuily stalked her from the shadows as she walked away from daryl, who was himself now distracted, away from safety.

She was lost in her own dark mind, worrying about food and shelter, angry at Daryl for getting them into this, angry at herself for blaming him, when the foul smelling, rough feeling hand grabbed her around the mouth. She tried to yell, and nothing but muffled noises escaped her. She was bound so quickly she barely registered what was happening, and she was clubbed over the head with something heavy, knocking her out cold.

Not before she saw Daryl, eyes again aflame, staring at her from a distance no more the 100 feet.

Why didn't he come?

* * *

The man in the bushes, Harley, came out, laughing, grinning a wide and gappy grin. His bayonet pointed at Daryl's head.  Daryl sneered and sped forward for him, teeth extended. He picked Harley up by the shoulders and threw him aside, heading towards the others, rubbing his hands on the thighs of his jeans. He didn't look back, he didn't need to. Harley would be fine.

It was Len he had his eyes on now. Tugging and pulling at Evie's pants as he was. But he strode slowly, purposefully. He needed Len to believe he was entirely and one hundred percent human.

Until the last second.

He struggled not to rush, not to speed forward and snap Len in two. He watched, almost broken in two himself, as Len stopped struggling with Evie, and began on his own zip fly, leering, drunk with lust. 

Another few steps. 

"Hey" he breathed, and Len, pecker in hand, turned without thinking first. Daryl grabbed him by the shoulders and Len's face became contorted with pain. 

"Where're the others?" Daryl asked, still serene and calm on the outside. Len shook his head.

"get ya filthy mitts off'a me boy" Daryl stretched his neck, rolling his head from one side to the other. He squeezed Len's shoulders a little more and a moan escapes Len's twisted mouth as he buckled an fell down to his knees.

"the rest of ya." Daryl said "where are they?" Len shook his head fast.

"I was jus' playin' they don't know we're here" 

"Rape ain't a game Len." Daryl said, his nostrils flaring at the sight of Len on his knees in the dirt. It was taking a lot of energy he barely had not to just rip his grease-ball head from his narrow shoulders and toss it like so much trash. The stink coming from him was overpowering in his fear, and Daryl growled at the abuse of his senses. 

So distracted, Daryl didn't notice Evie coming to. 

* * *

Her head was pounding. Her vision was blurry, she felt hungover and sick. She tried to raise a hand to her head but she could barely move. She felt broken. 

Her eyes fell closed again and she tried so har to open them. They wouldn't relent. She was cold, and something felt very wrong. She could hear voices, but couldn't place them. 

"We's jus' havin a li'l fun, dare, ain't gotta be like that" She screwed her eyes up as if she might be able to force them to open and focus but all it did was make her head hurt more. 

"Fun. The fuck kinda fun is this? She's out cold. Is that what ya into? Huh? Cold bodies? D'ya get 'em to take a cold shower n lay still while ya have at 'em with ya limp Dick?" Evie shook her head, wanting the noises to stop, they were Shooting right through her head.

"I ain't a necrophile, Daryl, it ain't like that man" she couldn't place the voice. It was whiny and scared, and it was speaking to Daryl.

"Daryl" she whispered, hoarse and quiet. He didn't reply, he hadn't heard. He couldn't hear. He was too involved with the whiny fucker she'd heard.

* * *

Daryl knew Harley had crept up on them, bayonet in hand. He grabbed Len by the forearms, still with his cock in his hand, and turned sneering to Harley.

Unable to use his weapon in shock, Harley stared at Daryl, at his fangs extended, dripping with the sap that would stop his victim's blood from clotting.

"The fuck are you?" Harley whispered, but Daryl just snarled back at him. 

"Need ya to take a message to Joe" Daryl took Len's forehead in his palm and wrenched his head back, exposing his neck. He gritted his teeth at the thought of Len's reeking blood sliding down his throat. He imagined it as black as Len's soul, but of course, it was red.

He slammed his face into Len's neck, fangs piercing the skin as Len screamed and blood squirted out in an arc. Daryl locked eyes with Harley, portraying everything he needed to with that look.

Harley turned on his heel and ran into the night, as Daryl drank from Len a life force he enjoyed more than he thought he would.

Even as Len's heart stopped, and the flow slowed, Daryl drank like he'd never drank before. 

* * *

Evie awoke properly a while later. She managed to sit herself up against a tree. Head still pounding she looked around her, unsure of exactly what happened. It was morning, almost, the sky was just starting to lighten to her left, and birds sung cautiously as if they knew it all change in a moment, and the sun might suddenly dip again.

What happened? They were just walking, and now...

Now her jeans were half way down her hips.

Her body tried to push back, to escape whatever danger did this to her, but she just smacked her back against the rough bark of the tree.

Did Daryl do this? she tried so hard to remember. Her hands flew to her pants as she lifted her butt and rearranged them. She took a deep breath to try and calm herself. Maybe she'd gone to pee and hit her head. It wouldn't be the weirdest thing to have ever happened to her.

With her jeans properly secured she took a look around. She couldn't remember setting up camp but, there were the strings of trash. Roamer alarm at the ready.

"Daryl?" She couldn't see him within the ropes. Maybe he'd left. Her head began to really throb but still nothing came to her. No sudden memory of why the Hell she was sitting here alone and half naked.

"Daryl!" She tried again, fear rising in her throat and making her voice squeak. She couldn't be alone, not again. Something brushed her arm and she squealed, turning to see it was just her hair. She rolled her eyes frustrated, and remembered being angry, but she didn't know if they had fought. she was starting to panic when his voice came floating towards her, all gravelly and dirty,

"Hey" She edged around the tree she sat against, still on her ass. He was outside the camp, outside of safety, walking to wards her in his creepy iridescent glow. He seemed brighter, somehow. She felt her face frown at him.

"What happened?" she asked him sharply, but he just stopped walking and cocked his head to one side at her like he didn't understand. "My Pants were undone, and someone is beating a drum in my head. What's going on?"

"I just popped out, Ya hit ya head" Evie stood, then wished she hadn't as her head swam, and Daryl ducked under their feeble protection.

"Out?" Where?" You shouldn't go out there alone, you shouldn't leave me alone" She bit her tongue, why shouldn't he? who was she to tell him?

"Hey" He said, his voice soothing, irritating her more "I just went to bury something in the woods. ok?" Evie grimaced, that really sounded like redneck slang for pooping.  She backed away from him as he got closer, not remembering what had happened or who had done what, it was unnerving. She didn't know if she could trust Daryl anymore.

"Why were my pants half down?" She asked sternly. "Did you try t..."

"No" he said sharply, cutting her off with his words and a look like daggers. "I would never... I ain't a rapist." Suddenly the word necrophile entered Evie's head, and she had no idea why. She shook it away as Daryl  
Shrugged.. "Maybe ya tried to pee. Y'were pretty out of it" Evie slowly shook her head. Out of what? She balled her hands into fists and gritted her teeth, approaching Daryl slowly and staring him in the eye. He looked taken aback, like he wanted to back away from her, but stood his ground. She pulled one of her balled fiats back and punched him on the jaw, if only because she was so frustrated with his non answers and questions. He didn't flinch, not in his far, but he grabbed her hand as she pulled it back again and held it firm.

"Don't do that" he said gently, gazing into her eyes "don't hit me. I protected you. I am protecting you" Evie tried to pull her hand from his grasp but couldn't. Her knuckles stung like she'd grazed them against a rock.

"Tell me what from" she asked softly, her energy zapped in that one punch. It was, after all it was the third morning she'd woken up hungry. He paused a moment, just staring at her with those deep blue eyes of his. The ones she wanted to swim in. Skies she wanted to get lost in.

"From everything." He answered eventually, as if it was obvious.

"By not telling me?" She asked, feeling calmer now. He let her hand go and she shook it out to get the blood flowing again. He nodded

"Uh huh". She chewed her lip, she was still annoyed, confused, but she trusted Daryl, she could trust Daryl.

"Ok. Can we get some food?" Daryl gave her a small smile and grabbed her pack, tossing it at her.

"Why don't ya open up One a ya tins? I admit defeat." 

_~~~~~~~_

_She pulled the cigarette from his lips and kissed him before he'd even exhaled. It was a hard kiss, desperate and needy, slimy with lip gloss which she left smeared half way across his face._

_Logical thinking was over. All that mattered now was him n this girl, n gettin' his dick wet as soon as possible. Her smell of sunsets, oranges and golds, grew as her lust did, as her pulse raised, and the little throb in her neck sent him over the edge.  He blacked out, completely._

_Either that or his mind had turned out the lights after he did it, in guilt, in shame, something in him just din't want to remember._

_~~~~~~~_


	8. Chapter 8

_Freya was hot, feverish, muttering jumbled, garbeled, nonsense, and Evie had no idea what to do. Tears coursed down her face as Freya made her promise to put gas in the car._

_"And don't stay out too late, and NO parking. It's not your car to fuck in" Evie nodded strongly_

_"I won't Freya. I love you"  She hadn't had to borrow Freya's car since she was 18, and Freya was in college, not using it herself anyway. 11 years, and a whole lifetime ago. Freya's big brown eyes seemed to focus suddenly on her baby sister._

_"You're so pretty. Don't forget that, inside and outside." Evie pinked, even if her big sister was losing her mind to the fever, it was a nice thing to say. She'd been bitten on the back of the neck, and there was nothing she could do to save her. "I'm dying Evie" Freya said solemnly. "I'm dying and it hurts so bad"_

~~~~~~~

Evie peeked around the tree she hid behind, hardly able to believe her eyes. A smile spread on her face and she breathed a sigh of relief.

"Don't count ya chickens" Daryl whispered behind her. She turned her head to look at him, and he was practically on her shoulder, tense and stiff. He didn't take his eyes off the small wooden building. "Ya ready?" He asked, and she nodded vehemently. She needed this, it was about time their luck changed.

"Hell yeah," She said darkly " let's go" she went to walk forward but Daryl put a hand on her shoulder, stopping her in her tracks.

"Stay close" he said, Evie frowned, but gave him a single nod. She gripped her knife and hunkered low, creeping forward now instead darting. Better safe than sorry, better safe than dead. What had she seen cross Daryl's face, and darken his eyes? Concern? She shook the thought away. His navy eyes were nothing but dark, narrow and blue. She kept reminding herself of that. They were _not_ skies, they were _not_ seas, and she wasn't going to let herself get lost in them again. She chided herself constantly for not demanding more of an explanation for her undressed state the other morning, and the moment had well and truly passed now. Perhaps it was nothing, but something niggled away at her telling her it was something, alright. A big something she just couldn't for the life of her remember.

Stupid Daryl and his stupid face.

"Wait up" Daryl called, huskily, behind her as she approached the door of this shack. She stopped as he barged past her. "Ain't ya never done this before?" He asked her, and she faltered.

"Not since" he looked back at her sharply, and she shrugged, "no" she said, then, deflated. Not since she'd been alone, not since Freya. Her dear big sister. She sighed and Daryl banged on the door heavily. She listened, hearing nothing come back and began to move forward again.

"Give it a minute" Daryl said roughly, so she stopped, dropping her hand from where it reached for the large brass door knob, and stood while they waited, hoping nothing would come. "How long ya been alone?" He asked when she was sure the silence would deafen her. She shrugged.

"A while" she answered simply, not wanting to talk about the past, approaching a window and looking in, shielding the reflections of outside with her hand. She felt Daryl huff and shift on his feet.

"Shouldn't be so close to the window" he said, visibly bristling, and she turned to him confused.

"There's nothing there." She said sounding sullen and hating herself for it. She was so terribly desperate to have cover that it was easy to fall into a whine. She put her hand to her head, and rubbed her temple with her eyes closed. "There's nothing coming" she said again. "What are we waiting for?" But Daryl stood, and gestured at her with his chin.

"Wait here" he said calmly, before disappearing around the side of the shack. Evie watched him go, what the hell? One minute she can't stray too far the next he leaves her standing. She shook her head to herself. He was a confusing creature. Odd and captivating all at once, with his sudden disappearances, and still that lack of sleep. She was twisting her auburn hair around her fingers and chewing at her lip when she heard him yelling her name. She turned on the spot and he appeared in front of her, looking haggard and out of breath.

"RUN"

* * *

He approached her from behind, her hair glowing a red halo around her head in the weak sunlight. He breathed her in, still full of Len's life force he could do so without worrying that his inner self, his true self, would show. She smelt like heaven, summer rain, a humidity lifting storm. He sensed her smile.

"Don't count ya chickens" he managed, holding his breath, holding in that scent. She turned to him, eyes huge and bright as she smiled. They were the greenest things he had ever seen, glowing, lit from within. He tore his eyes away, looking instead at the shack she had found. It was dark, quiet, and he thought perhaps it was empty. Still, when she headed to move forward he faltered, reaching out to her at lightning speed.

"Stay close" he managed, and she nodded. I've lost enough people by splitting up, he thought, Beth's big cornflower eyes lighting in his head for a millisecond. He blinked them away, he couldn't think about Beth, her perfume of sun and corn and youth. No. She was gone. Evie was here. Evie and her even stronger, sweeter, more enticing perfume, Evie who had turned from something he wanted to devour, to something he wanted to protect and keep Forever. If anything happened to this amazing and intriguing creature... He stopped that thought before it formed.

"Wait up" he called as Evie reached for the door. Was she crazy? "How long ya been alone?" He wondered aloud. She shrugged at him and muttered something unintelligible. He watched her approach the window after he knocked on the door. Her movements were graceful and elegant, beautifully at odds with the world around them. He told her not to get too close to the window, didn't want her being seen by creatures or, even worse, people, who could be hiding inside. He was pretty sure there weren't any, but he'd been wrong before. Hell, had he been very wrong before.

He motioned for her to stay put as a sound around the back finally caught his attention. He assumed it might be one or two of the undead freaks that seemed to be ruling the roost these days, he wondered how he hadn't heard them sooner, or smelled them for that matter. He'd been so off recently, as if Evie was just far too distracting for him. Was that so bad? He liked to act as human as possible.

Cornflower eyes flashed in his head again and he willed them away, not again. Ain't losin' no one else.

He rounded the shack as the smell and noise grew. He caught them all facing away, lurkers. No wonder he hadn't heard them, they were almost silent, just waiting for some poor soul to stumble across their path. At least 40 were in the shack's meagre garden alone, and he knew that whatever he could or could not do, it was too many. He took a step backward, thinking he'd find his original silent path, but stood on a large stick which snapped under his boot.

"Shit" He muttered to himself as the monsters all turned to look at him, beginning their undead shamble toward where he stood. "Fuck" he cursed again "EVIE!" He yelled, and Images of Beth again came to mind, as he yelled at her to escape through a window. Not this time, this time they were staying together, whatever the cost.  "RUN!" He yelled as he turned the corner of the shack again, and at first she didn't seem to know how to, she stood still for the lifetime it took to get to her side and grab her arm to move her forward.

As the beasts came from behind they full circled the hut. He'd seen in a split second a brick out building they could hole up in until the walkers got bored and moved on.

Would they move on? How long had they been lurking in the hunter's home from home garden? He had no time to contemplate as he dragged Evie around the little hut and towards the building. He was moving at his Vampire's pace, and he knew Evie would have questions. Questions could wait, though, they'd have to be quiet a while.

* * *

As they approached the smaller building at impossible velocity, Evie realised it was a toilet. The stupidest and most inane thoughts flew through her mind at almost matching speed.

What if it's locked. What if it's locked from the inside because someone died in there. It's not unreasonable to think so, Elvis died on the toilet. Maybe they got bitten and hid from their friends and family in there, couldn't finish the job and just locked themselves away.

She chanced a look behind her and Daryl seemed to shake her arm as though to stop her. Don't look, that shake said, Don't upset yourself. But she did look, and she saw a horde of 40 or more on their tail, though slower, so much slower, than them, they were relentless in coming, stumbling and rambling, but moving forward all the time.

They reached the outhouse, and Daryl threw himself into the door, which opened easily, and he stumbled in, crashing against the back wall. He bounced back out, grabbed Evie's arm and pulled her in with immeasurable force.

"Lock the door" He raced, and she looked, finding a simple bolt.

"That's not gonna hold" she replied, panic throwing her words at him with an edge of teenage sullenness. she berated herself, she was 30, not 13. Daryl looked at it and shrugged.

"It's all we got." He answered, as if that made it all ok. She put her back against the door and took in the room. A small and dirty toilet at the back, a sink on the right wall. There was one tiny window up high, and three solid brick walls in the building designed for one thing and one thing only. It wasn't what she envisioned when she prayed for four walls and a roof. There wasn't even really enough room for them both.

She pressed her back against the door, panting hard, and wondered how they would know when the walkers were gone. That was the point, right? To hole up just long enough for them to lose interest? Daryl appeared to be making himself comfortable. he put down the lid on the toilet and sat down, his hands dangling between his knees, his elbows resting on his legs. He wasn't even out of breath.

"How long until dark?" she asked him, and he looked up, his eyes narrower than ever. He put his finger to his lips and pursed them. Hushing her for the second time and raising her hackles with the gesture. She rolled her eyes and slid slowly down to the floor, her back firm against the door. She threw her head back and stared at the nicotine stained ceiling above her. They were committed to this now. There was no escape until the walkers lost interest.

* * *

Dark was drawing in when Daryl sat back down, having watched the roamers out the window for the last 45 minutes, standing on the toilet seat stock still and barely breathing. They'd ben holed up for hours, and hadn't spoken a word.

"What was her name" he said quietly as he got comfortable. Evie looked up, confused at the out of the blue question. Whose name? Was he delirious?

"What?" Daryl shrugged, his blue eyes piercing into her despite the darkness. His skin glowing with that celestial light despite the dimness in prison they occupied.

"Ya Sister, what was her name?"Evie knew what he was doing, or at least, trying to do.

"They're still out there" she said "You thought they'd be gone and now we're stuck in a damn toilet, surrounded." Daryl nodded, deflated, giving in.

"Yeah" he said, an edge to his voice, defensive and rough. "They'll go, eventually they'll just wander off." Evie looked at him a long moment before throwing her head back again and staring at the yellowing ceiling once more.

"Her name was Freya. she was a couple years older than me" She stopped and looked at him again. He was listening, actually interested in what she had to say. It confused her and she felt her eyes narrow to slits, just like his. "None of this matters" she said, quietly, and Daryl cocked his head to one side, dark blue eyes widening just a little.

"Course it does" he started, but Evie shrugged, cutting him off. It was over, gone.

"It doesn't help to reminisce" she spat, and looked back up to the ceiling. "It just holds you back. You've got to move on. This world isn't gonna wait for anyone, least of all those of us stuck in the past. You learn, you move on. that's all there is now" She looked back at him, and his unreal glow was almost lighting the room as it darkened rapidly around them. "All that we have to think about right now is getting out of here. I guess we're stuck until morning" She got up from the floor and approached him, not sure where her boldness had suddenly come from. She put her foot on the lid of the toilet between his legs and hoisted herself up to the window, it was lighter outside, and she could see the undead milling around, just waiting for dinner

Unbeknown to her, Daryl was thinking the same thing. Her femoral artery, there in her groin, was just centimetres from his nose, assaulting him with that undeniable aroma of cool wet rain with every throb of her pulse.


	9. Chapter 9

_Blood._  
_It was everywhere. All over the truck, seeping under the door to the dry and cracked asphalt of the carpark._

_~~~~~~~_

Daryl tore his eyes away from Evie's crotch and grabbed her hips with both hands. He lifted her from the lavatory lid and placed her, gently but firmly, on the floor in front of him. She eyed him carefully, suspiciously, before stepping back out of his reach. Her eyes didn't leave his but her voice wavered as she spoke.

"What was that?" He closed his eyes, leaning forward on to his knees, and took a deep breath before he looked at her again. He needed to be strong.

"I'm going out there" he said, and he watched the colour drain slowly from her face. She shook her head slowly, as though she was stunned.

"No" she said, quiet in the darkness, barely a whisper though he heard her perfectly. It broke his heart that she thought he was considering death over staying here with her.

"I can draw them away" she backed up to the door and braced herself against it, as though that might stop him. He'd laugh if the situation were any different. She stretched her arms, putting her hands flat on the walls either side of her.

"Have you lost your mind?" It was more an accusation than a question. Her whisper now harsh, trying to be angry and quiet all at once. Daryl stood, stepped forward so they were inches apart.

"Have you?" He accused right back, as if she had every idea what he was capable of. "It's the only way." He spat, wishing she knew how easy this could be, for him at least. "You've seen how fast I can be."

"Yeah, I've seen, I've felt it." She narrowed her eyes, he was trying to distract her from the point again, and he realised it wouldn't work "No" she said once more, her voice weak and pleading "I can't be alone again" Daryl watched as her eyes widened. "You'll die, and I'll be stuck in this god damned crapper until I die of Starvation and madness" her words were fierce, Daryl could tell she meant them, but she spoke softly, sadly.

"I'll be back" he said, a promise he was inclined to keep, the distance between them still only inches. "I'll draw them away and come back for you" but she shook her head sadly, and a single tear escaped her eye and slowly weaved its way down her face. She ignored it, Daryl couldn't, he wanted to wick it away, to hold her in his arms and promise her that he would, definitely, be back for her. How could he make her understand without divulging exactly how he could be so sure.

"No one comes back" She whispered, dropping her arms from their extended position, she seemed to shrink, fold in on herself, and Daryl couldn't help what came next.

* * *

She wasn't looking at him anymore, and he moved so fast she'd barely have been ready even if she was watching his every move.

His lips were on hers, and he held her face so gently, so softly, she could have cried. To her it felt like goodbye, and once the shock wore down she kissed him back hard, wanting him to know he had something to come back for.

His hands were tangled in her hair not a moment later, pulling her into him with a strength that belied his tender touch and she was drawn in easily, wanting to explore every inch of him so suddenly and so badly. The tension melted from her and logical thought was gone. Now the world consisted of her and Daryl and this strange power he had over her. She knew, deep down, that he had some innate ability to make any woman swoon to their knees, to want him this way, and she hadn't, not at first.

She also knew he expected her to be scared and now, finally, she was. What was this feeling? That was her fear, that now he was kissing her and she wanted him more than she had in the moments before their lips touched. She was scared of how someone could make her feel that way with a simple kiss. How she suddenly wanted to him to throw her on the floor and nip and bite and fuck like animals, to have his way with her. She'd welcome it. She was scaring herself, petrified by what now she would feel if he didn't come back, despite his promises and insistence.

She pulled away, inch by inch her body disconnected from his, until all that touched were their lips, and even they soon detached, dragged away from each other as if, with minds of their own, they didn't want to part.

Her hands went to his chest as he moved forward to her again, and he stopped dead. She panted, catching her breath from that insane moment.

"Don't" she managed through quickened breaths "Don't just kiss me and think it will all be ok" She chanced a look up at him, he wasn't breathless, he wasn't falling to pieces at a simple kiss, like she was. He was composed, like everything he did was on purpose. Like he wanted her to feel exactly the way she did.

"It ain't goodbye" he said to her, his gravel laden voice breaking as he spoke. "It's a promise I'll come back" she shook her head

"Now when you don't come back it'll just be worse" she jutted her chin a little at him and moved from the door. "Go. Just go. I'll work it out on my own like I always have."

"Lock the door behind me" he said, as he reached for the doorknob after unbolting the small latch she was still so sure wouldn't hold.  With tears coursing down her face she nodded. What else could she do?

* * *

He felt Evie pulling away, and slowly let her. He felt empty without her in his arms and moved forward just to touch her again, but when her hands found his chest he stopped at the look in her eyes. She was furious.

He gritted his teeth to keep from just grabbing her anyway, fought hard against the blood flow to his groin and willed his fangs to stay put in his upper jaw. It was a fight he was winning, until she looked up at him with those glassy eyes, her lashes thick and black making her look coy as she peeked out from beneath them. He had to look away, and as she moved from the door, deflated and spent, he seized the opportunity to head for it himself, and be away from the fragrance she didn't even know she exuded. It was stronger now in her fast paced breathing and heightened emotion.

Without meaning to, he imagined how it would feel to make love to her, how could the scent get better, stronger, than it already was, as it did in the throes of passion? Then she told him to go, to just go. snapping him from his unbidden daydream.

So he did, if only to prove to her he would be back, and berate himself for unclean thoughts of her, he left her crying in a toilet surrounded by remarkably able dead bodies.

"Like the prom date I never had" he thought aloud with a smile. He shook his head, dismissive but still grinning, before clapping his hands together and hollering, getting the attention of the walkers so he could begin to lure them away. He felt good, for the first time in a long time.

He had a plan in mind just to lead them as far and as fast as their shambling, crumbling, forms would go, losing one or two in the process wouldn't be a problem, and if he could resist being bitten all the while it would go a lot smoother, a lot quicker, and he could get back to Evie and continue the search for his family

He found some train tracks which seemed as good a lead as any, and led the decaying souls down them for a few miles. He was content, happy to be himself in the cold and the dark, speeding up and slowing down as he saw fit. Breathing without Evie's scent was somehow empowering, even though it left him feeling a little lost. But he was going to head back soon, before daybreak for sure, and he could race to her at a comfortable lightning speed.

Until he smelt Michonne and Carl.

Everyone's natural perfume was different. Even similar scents were distinguishable to him. The familiar aroma of strawberries and summer evenings was distinctly Michonne, and the overwhelming smell of fresh cut pine was definitely Carl. He scented the air again, nostrils flaring as he happened upon a candy wrapper. He checked behind him to be sure the dead were still coming before knocking the wrapper with his foot. The mixed scent assaulted him, it was still strong and fresh. Now he really was torn. Was he leading these deadheads right into the arms of his family? Could they have veered off the tracks at all? Why would they, when having a destination was all anyone wanted anymore. Was Rick with them? A million questions, at a hundred miles an hour, shot through his mind, and he had answers to simply none of them.

Now with the dead up his ass, Evie stuck in a 3ft square Toilet, and his family possibly just ahead of him, he no longer felt good and lifted. His mood darkened, as he contemplated who should be his first port of call. Get rid of the dead and go back for Evie, but then his family's trail would be that much colder, they'd be that much farther away. But if he chased his family now Evie might not hang around, she was so sure he was done for anyway. Speed would help him. If he could follow the trail of his friends fast, he would have a lead if he came back with Evie, and they could catch up that much quicker.

Now he just needed to know what to do with the 40 strong herd of walkers following him.

* * *

Evie stared at the back of the door where Daryl had been only moments before.

He'd gone. He had actually gone and left her. She buried her hands into the curls on top of her head and squeezed her eyes closed. He was dead, she was dead, and everything was screwed. She opened her eyes and looked at the door again. She might as well just walk out there yelling, arms open to invite all and sundry, walkers, animals, humans, to come and finish her off. Better dead than alone.

She threw herself at the door but rather than flinging it open she slid the little bolt across, what good it might do, and took a took a step back gulping hard. He had to come back, she had to at least give him a few hours before giving up on him. He was fast he was a hunter, He could look after himself, and so far, he'd looked after her.

Maybe she could try and work out what it was about him that was so different to anyone else she had ever met. He shone with some inner light, like the pictures of Jesus and the saints in her Sunday school picture books. That was laughable though, because he was also dirty and sultry and dark. Sultry. The word reverberated in her ears as though she had said it aloud. It described him perfectly, his eyes, his mood, that kiss... She shook her head sharply, pushing the thoughts away. she had a job to do here, she had to stay alive in the hope he would come back. If he came back and she were dead, it would have been a risk for nothing.

    
So she sat on the toilet seat, knife in hand watching the door with a stern glare on her face.

* * *

 Daryl was carefully leading walkers off the derelict train-tracks and into the surrounding tree cover when he caught a whiff of something else all too familiar. Thick and black like melted asphalt, the scent attacked his nose and his memories in a single blow

Joe.

He turned his head and saw the walkers were now off the track, and he'd done everything he could to keep them away from both Evie and his family. Not that they should be separate in his mind anymore. Evie was family now if she liked it or not.

He turned and headed back for the outhouse he'd left her in, travelling fast enough that the walkers didn't even notice him. He'd collect her, he thought as trees and bushes bent in the wake of his passing, and rush her back to the tracks. He was certain that Joe and his cronies were on Michonne and Carl's trail. Joe had vaguely mentioned a killer, killing one of his men, and that's who they had been after. Daryl could believe it, he'd have happily turned every one of them into the undead and let them roam a dark and troubled afterlife. He felt himself sneer and sped himself on a little faster.

 


	10. Chapter 10

_The noises she made were classic porn parody, and eventually he placed his hot and dry hand over her mouth to keep her quiet. She looked at him then, opened her chocolate eyes and they instantly grew wide and fearful._

_~~~~~~~_

Evie blinked away the sweat that was running into her eyes. Sitting, staring and worrying was more hard work than she'd imagined it could be. She took a deep breath, anxiety building in her chest making it hard to breathe regularly.

A noise outside made her stand up, ready to fight whatever horror may walk in, and when the door burst inward she flew forward, knife raised above her head and a yell on her lips. The intruder grabbed her knife wielding hand, but not before she'd slashed out. He put his free hand around her mouth. She stopped, unable to move, eyes wide and staring into the narrow dark blue eyes she'd come to know so well.

"Daryl" she tried to say, muffled by his hand which then slowly let her go. "Shit" her eyes lighted on his slashed wrist, the blood oozing out at quite a pace, and panic shot through her again. Daryl let her go completely and pulled the sleeve of his denim jacket down over his cut arm.

"I told ya I'd be back" he said with a small smirk. Evie ignored him, grabbing for his arm.

"Let me see that" she rushed, "shit you might need stitches. Why didn't you damn we'll announce yourself before you came flying in here?" He pulled his arm out of reach and shook his head

"I don't need stitches. We need to leave" Evie frowned

"You might, let me see. You could get infected" she grabbed for his arm and he pulled it out of reach again.

"Did you hear me? We have to go" he pronounced the last four words very purposefully, and Evie stopped trying to grab him. She looked him in the eye curiously. He was smiling, genuinely excited for the first time in the few days she'd known him. It was lovely, it lit him up even more, and she thought maybe it was catching as she felt her face change and a smile lift the corners of her mouth.

"Where?" She asked him, putting her knife back in her belt and reaching for her pack, ready to follow him wherever he went so long as it was out of this poor excuse for shelter. He looked her over, studied her, making her uncomfortable.

"Maybe we should get some rest" but Evie shook her head. Gross.

"I am not sleeping in a toilet" she sneered at the thought, looking Daryl up and down. "What happened out there?" Daryl shrugged at her, not sure how to explain how he managed to follow a cold trail without her asking questions.

"I... I found their trail. Well, Carl and Michonne anyway" Evie looked at him blankly.

"Are they your family?" He nodded once.

"Yeah"

"Then we should go now, while the trail is still at least lukewarm." She looked up at him, and knew something was wrong, there was more. She could feel it in her very bones and see it in the way he looked at her, apologetically.

"What?" She asked cautiously, taking a step back and expecting him to tell her she wouldn't be welcome with them.

Daryl sighed heavily, from his very boots, and looked away.  
"Joe's also trackin' 'em" his voice was deep and sorrowful, but Evie just shrugged at him.

"So we keep our distance and try to work something out." She looked up and her smile faltered.

* * *

 

Daryl realised that, of course, she didn't know what had happened.

"They're bad people Evie" he said as gravely as he could, but Evie rolled her eyes.

"You're so dramatic. So they stole our breakfast" she looked at him and reached for his arm, rubbing his bicep gently "you'll get over it" she said with mocking comfort in her voice, and Daryl felt a rage rise in him.

"No" he said, flatly, sharply backing out of her reach. "Ya don't know what they're capable of. Ya don't remember." Evie's face screwed up into a frown and she dropped her pack onto the floor.

"What does that mean?" Her voice was soft, worried, and Daryl cursed himself. He didn't want her to know, she'd be better off if she didn't. 

"They're just bad. We have to be careful. But we should go" he turned to the door, hoping to just get on their way and ignore this damned stupid and pointless exchange, wasting time and energy arguing was idiotic.

"No" Evie said behind him, and the word was so small but so final. He turned slowly and she was standing, her knife back in her hand, looking like she really meant business. "I can't go anywhere out there with someone I can't trust." She said gently "I want to trust you Daryl, I have a feeling I should, but I know you're not telling me something" Daryl leant back against the door as her eyebrows raised at him, a challenge he could do without.

She didn't lower her knife, but he could tell she wasn't about to use it on him.

"For your safety" he said and she finally lowered the knife to her side, exasperated. "Evie" she slowly shook her head at him, waved her free hand as though she was dismissing him. Waves of her heady scent flew from the tips of her fingers and Daryl Knew he wasn't going to Leave without her.

It wasn't just the aroma, she glowed, like an angel. The idea would have been laughable, to anyone else she was just as dull and plain as all the other unknown faces in the world, but he'd never seen a light like it, and he wanted to keep it and nurture it forever.

It dawned on him they might be soul mates, and if he wasn't a vampire, if the dead hadn't got up from their eternal slumber, he would have laughed at the idea. But the world wasn't the same as it had been, and he knew anything was possible.

"Go, Daryl. Get out of here. Your family need you, more than I do. I can't go if I can't trust you" Daryl stood a little straighter, the idea of leaving her behind putting a weight on his chest.

"I ain't goin' without ya. Ya can trust me" she cocked her head to  
One side and smiled a small smile.

"I want to" and Daryl's heart sped up "I can't" she said then, "not enough" Daryl Chewed on his tongue thinking about just how much he had kept back. How many lies he had told. If she lost faith in him she'd never have faith in Rick and the others. Faith.

Beth flashed in his mind again, sun and corn and youth, and he gritted his teeth. He'd lost enough. All she wanted to know was about that one night.

"Len" he said, not sure where to go from there. Evie sneered at his very name, but she wanted to know the truth, so he told her.

"He was gonna rape ya" he said matter of factly after giving her the outline of Harley distracting him so Len could make a start "Harley too I reckon."

"How" she asked quietly, not looking at him. He didn't answer right away and she slid down to the toilet seat behind her, sitting hunched over forwards with her hands dangling between her legs.

"How?" He asked, not sure what she meant.

"How did you kill him? If Harley was distracting you, how did you get there unharmed to kill Len and not get killed by Harley?" He shrugged at her, she sounded suspicious.

"Ya wanted the truth" she nodded

"So tell me the truth, Daryl"  He sighed and thought carefully about how to continue. He'd thrown Harley a hundred feet away with a single hand and rushed forward before Len could... Do what he was planning to do. He drained Len completely, until he shrivelled cold and dead under his fangs.

"I saw red" he said honestly. "And it was like, I had this sudden surge of power, wild dogs couldn't have stopped me" she looked up, light starting to come back into the world as the sun again rose on another day.

She was smiling sarcastically.

"How sweet" she said, sounding as though it wasn't sweet at all. "You were burying him in the woods that morning?" Daryl nodded and she shrugged at him, pursing her lips and looking stern "without a shovel?"  
_I used my bare hands, like a dog._

"I was gonna dig with a stick or somethin' but I was lucky, found a pre dug hole, was good enough for him. Maybe too good. I shoulda left him to rot" Evie nodded, huffing a short humourless laugh.

"Yeah. I agree" she sighed heavily and looked up at him again. "I guess I should thank you, for saving me from him. You should have told me." She eyed him seriously, again looking like she could see to his very core. Daryl turned his eyes away, he couldn't bear that feeling that she could see right into him. He felt, if she looked long enough, she'd see right through him, and realise he was just another one of the monsters. She shook her head, red curls bouncing every which way, and stood.

"I don't think you're a monster" she said, as though she'd read his mind "killing is just a part of this new world, I guess." She threw her pack over her shoulder. "C'mon, before the trail dies out"

* * *

 Evie was trying to keep her eyes and ears all around her, but something just kept niggling at her thoughts.

They'd been walking over an hour and Daryl hadn't once looked to see where he was. He'd only been gone a couple of hours that night, surely it wasn't much farther until he picked up where he left off.

The sun was lifting a mist all around them, too. Her legs disappeared below the knee into a damp cloud of smoky grey, so he'd have even less idea where he was. She looked at his back, ahead of her as he was, crossbow bouncing with each step he took. It was irritating her, how he was so quiet and so secretive, how he walked so damned upright and seemed to float like he walked on air instead of cold hard earth.

"What are we looking for?" She asked him, an accusatory tone to her question. Daryl stopped and turned back to face her. "A foot print, maybe, or"

"Candy wrapper" Daryl cut her off and she felt her face drop

"What?" She was astounded. He was placing all his hopes on a piece of trash. "What?" She said again when he didn't answer her, and she stormed towards him feeling rage like she'd never felt before. "A candy wrapper, which could have been moved by the wind, or a walker... A piece of trash is what we're laying our hopes on?" Daryl didn't falter, barely blinked or moved even though she was yelling in his face. It frustrated her more and she took a deep breath and let it out through her nose, nostrils flaring. _Then_ he turned his face to one side, closing his eyes like he couldn't stand her breathing on him.

She scratched her forehead, ran her hand over her hair and shook her head before pushing him in the chest with both hands.

"You dick!" She yelled, pushing him again "I can't run around after ghosts. A fucking candy bar?! What the hell is wrong with you?" She went to push him again and he caught her wrists, holding them inches from his chest. She flexed her fingers, her wrists aching under his palms.

"Ain't chasin' no ghosts. I know it sounds stupid, but I know my family. It was them." She tried to jerk her hands away but he wouldn't let her go. "You are a violent and unpredictable creature, Evie, but I need you to regain control of yourself." He let her go, and she scowled at him.

"A creature? That's rich coming from a redneck cockroach." She rubbed at her wrists and turned from him. "Violent and unpredictable, says he who killed a man and buried him in the woods" she heard Daryl take a step forward and she turned on him.

"Ain't no need" he said quietly, hands outstretched as if to ward her off "to get violent on me, I saved ya life, twice. I din't mean to upset ya." His voice was soft, hypnotic, but Evie didn't drop her sneer as his outstretched hands turned into pointing fingers. She pursed her lips and ran her tongue over her teeth.

"How can you be so sure?" She asked, still staring him down as if they were in some kind of stand off. She couldn't work out where her anger kept coming from, but she hadn't eaten in at least a day, and they run out of water hours ago. She waited, impatiently, for a reply which wouldn't have her smacking him, everything he did seemed to piss her off.

"I feel it" he took a step towards her, closing the gap to Mere centimetres, "I smell it" he added "you ever just sense when something was right or wrong and it turned out to be true?" He gently took her upper arms in his hands and held her, that soft touch that made her feel so emotional.

She looked him in the eyes, those dark blue eyes she knew she could trust. They sparkled in the sun and she lost the steely composure she was fighting to keep with him.

"Yes" she said, just as soft as his touch "ok. Ok." He studied her a moment and she narrowed her eyes at him. "Don't wait for me to change my mind" he nodded, just one single head dip, and turned away sharply

"C'mon, the railway's up here" and he began to move away. She shook her head as though to clear it.

She always felt so fuzzy after looking in his eyes. It was just another thing to add to the long list of oddities where Daryl was concerned.

She mulled that over as they walked in the rising sunlight, as their shadows disappeared and then started to lengthen again.

They found the tracks and followed them a way while she thought about all the things that had struck her about Daryl. His impossible speed, the fact that he didn't so much as flinch when she slashed his arm, that he felt so hot under her hands every time she touched him. That ethereal glow and those deep dark eyes. She was still so sure he was bitten by a walker, and oh how it felt to have his lips on hers.

She stopped walking, raising her fingers to her mouth, so soft, but so eager. He was turning towards her now, wondering, she guessed, why she had stopped. She smiled, and began to jog toward him, everything slowed down, she called his name still smiling, even as a stitch attacked her side. She faltered putting her hand on it, but she hadn't eaten in over 24 hours, she was unfit of course, but the pain grew, and grew to a burning bright hot pain, and Daryl was yelling and running towards her. She looked down, and an arrow was hanging from her torso.

She stopped running and fell to her knees, her hand came away from her side covered in her own hot blood, and then Daryl was lifting her, like she weighed nothing. She was sure it was a dream, because he ran with her and the bushes and grasses seemed to bend out of their way, and Daryl was glowing like a full moon. He began to growl like a dog and he had a mouth full of teeth like one, too, big long canines that poked out of his upper lip. Then things started to fade, and she knew she must be waking up. Knew that the dream would soon be over and she'd open her eyes in that cold dark outhouse, because Daryl didn't make it back, and she was doomed to die alone.

 


	11. Chapter 11

_"You have to do it, Evie, I'm too weak" Evie took Freya's face in her hands and shook her head, tears free flowing._  
_"I can't, I'm scared I don't wanna be alone" Freya smiled, but her eyes were already dimming._  
_"If there's truly an afterlife, I'll send you a special Angel, baby sister." She started coughing and blood spewed from her lips. "Please, it hurts, Evie"_

_~~~~~~~_

Daryl hadn't hurt so much in his life as when he saw that bolt appear in Evie's side. Never felt so angry and torn as when she looked, stunned, at her own blood coating her hand, on her knees, bleeding out.  
He had to make a choice in a short second. Chase the assholes who he could hear laughing and jeering, the assholes he could smell and knew from a mile away, avenge her.  
Or save her.

There was no choice, not really.

As the cowards laughed and cheered on their merry way he ran to her and scooped her up. Her pulse was racing and at the delicious smell of her blood his fangs extended all by themselves, he sneered and hissed and ran with her, paying his natural, animal, instincts no mind. She had to be saved.

With no idea where they might go he ran blindly into the afternoon, racing along the tracks that might, at least, lead somewhere.

He found an old rail freight car, it had a hand painted message in it but he wasn't interested. He kicked the side and waited for movement and sound from inside. When none came he placed Evie gently on the floor, and rooted in her pack for the tools he'd noticed. He pulled out an old and rusty screwdriver. The plastic handle chipped and sharp in places, and used it to jiggle the doors open. He dragged her in, and pulled the doors to behind them. It was dark, but sunlight peeked through old wear holes and bullet holes and with her natural glow, and his inhuman vision, he could see just fine for what he wanted to do.  
The trouble now was, could he do it? He'd never healed before, he'd seen Merle do it, several times, and though he mostly did well, there was that one time when it didn't work.

~~~~~~~

_"She's too far gone" he'd said, pulling his teeth back in with muscles humans didn't even know could be utilised. Merle looked back at Daryl, standing on the asphalt feeling sorry for himself. "I tol' ya to be careful Daryl!" He yelled, and Daryl flinched, looking at his shoes and the blood there. The blood every damned where_

_8 pints my ass, he had thought to himself._

_~~~~~~~_

He shook the thoughts away, checking Evie's pulse. It was there, but it was faint. He had just lucked out that she was blissfully unaware of what he was about to do to save her life.  
First he had to get the bolt out, and he knew blood was going to pulse out of her the moment he did. He didn't have time to waste preparing himself to do so. He held his breath as if that would make a difference, and grabbed the arrow near the wound.  
"I'm sorry, Evie, this is gonna sting like a bitch" he whispered, and gently tugged, not daring to think of what organs were where on the right side of her body. She grunted in her slumber, but that was all, as the bolt slid free and, as Daryl predicted, a wave of blood followed. He closed his eyes against the fragrance and took a deep breath through his mouth.

"Ok, that's the worst over" he said to her, looking at the bloody bolt. Except, now he had to undress her. He pulled her tshirt up to her bust, and gently unzipped her fly. He took another deep breath and edged her pants down a little. In his minds eye he dragged her pants and underwear down to her ankles, and his own too, but he willed it away. He didn't have to follow instinct.

The wound was small and only a little torn where he'd removed the arrow, which was good. It still oozed, thick red blood which positively called his name. He shook his head and rubbed at his eyes, trying to decide what to do next.

He noticed how thin she was, and knew that he'd have to hunt for her, alone, to make the most of his skills, but for now her belly would have to lay concave, her hip bones would have to remain too obvious. He ran his hand over the wound and it came away fresh with blood, it wasn't pulsing out anymore, but it still flowed. He bent his head, closing his eyes, and licked tentatively at the small ragged hole, to clean it. He sat back and opened his eyes, the whole world came into bright and startling existence. It was like being high. She tasted sweet and fresh, like citrus without the bitterness, and he had to fight the urge to lean down and drink from her. The wound was clean, he didn't need to taste anything else.

He took a deep breath, licking his lips. Her hair was shining like the sun, but soon the world was fading back to normal, the high wearing off. He sighed and rubbed the back of his hand across his forehead, an old habit, there was no sweat there. He blew air out through his mouth, wondering what best came next. She could drink from him if she were awake, but the state of her, the risk of her choking, it was not an option he could explore. He didn't want to wake her unnecessarily, rest was healing, everyone knew that.

So he'd have to decant, and that was the more difficult option of the two.

He pulled his denim jacket off, rolled up the sleeve of his shirt, extended his fangs and bit into his wrist. He cringed away from the smell and taste, foul to himself, an evolutionary strategy to keep him from getting high on himself.  
He held his wrist against the wound in Evie's side, and hoped it would work, hoped it would be enough. He tore the sleeves from his shirt and patched her up. The wound would hopefully heal now, but he needed to keep the farce up, some visual representation of 'medical help' would stop her losing her mind. Now, all he could do was wait.

* * *

Evie woke up slowly, first came sound. Heavy and harsh breathing which she didn't recognise as her own, the tap of branches and leaves on the roof in the breeze. She mumbled and screwed her eyes up. She'd rather be asleep, no need to run when you're sleeping. Nothing to be scared of.

She breathed through her nose and smells came to her. Autumn leaves that crunched underfoot, woolly jumpers and knitted scarves, cool winds and pumpkin pie. She felt herself smiling, good smells with great memories.

She gave in, slowly opening her eyes to find Daryl sitting next to her, watching her intently. But something was different. His glow was bright and obvious, his plaid shirt looked bright, clean, the Reds redder, the blacks... Well, blacker. She could see all the colours in his blue eyes, greens and golds, which studied her carefully and solemnly. She tried to sit up, remembering her dream, thinking he was dead, but she was tied around the waist, and panic set in.

"What?" She tried and her voice was hoarse.

"Easy." Daryl said, and his voice was like birdsong, bright and lovely. "Here, drink" he held bottle to her lips but she turned away from it.

"Untie me" she said sternly, and Daryl looked confused. She looked down at herself, realising she wasn't tied up, but more tied together. His bright and colourful shirt sleeves a wad of bandaging at her waist. It came flooding back, her dream that she was shot and Daryl turning into a dog. "It was a dream" she said, her own voice like tinkling glass "just a dream?" She looked again at Daryl who was shaking his head.

"Nah. Ya did get shot, with an arra. We're in a train car, ya've been sleepin'. Healin'." Evie frowned, so, what about his teeth...

"But... you were a _wolf_ " she smiled at the thought, "you had big teeth and... You... Carried me..." Her voice trailed off and she sat up, fast, fussing at the bandages and untying the knots Daryl had gently pulled around her. She stared, astounded, as the sleeves fell away revealing nothing but her skin, no mark or scar plagued her flesh. She rubbed at the area the arrow had been in with her hand, confused, scared, then looked at Daryl whose face was a picture of self loathing and gravity.

"What the fuck?" She asked him softly, but panic ridden "what the actual fucking fuck is going on?" Daryl moved towards her but she scuttled back away from him. "No. You tell me. You glow, like the moon, like you suck in light and reflect it, you can run like the wind, you survived a walker bite... And you had teeth like... Like a wolf. I get shot with a bolt and now, nothing? What are you, Daryl, what the fuck kind of freak are you?" She backed away a little more, scooting on her ass even though something in her was trying to pull her toward him. She equally wanted to rip his clothes off and rip his throat out. Her head span and she tried to steady herself, putting her hands on the floor, which she could feel buzzing under her fingertips.

She brought her hands to her face and saw that she, too, glowed like the moon. She looked around her again, and she could see the colours of the sun shafts poking through the bullet holes at the walls, she could smell the gun powder, long gone and dissipated with time, and that other smell, like fall, all around her. She couldn't get away from it.

"Am I still dreaming?" she asked, her voice shaking and her eyes wide. Daryl shook his head, still looking so lost and forlorn.

"Nah." he said softly, "But it'll go, eventually" Evie placed a hand on her side, just above her hip, where just hours before she was speared. She looked at Daryl, who looked so undeniably sad, it broke her heart. She chewed her lip, not sure she was in her right mind at all anymore.

"I can see the colour of the air" she said softly, dreamlike. "I can see the colour of my voice... I mean I can't, but I can" She shook her head. "It doesn't make sense. Are we even real?" She went to stand, but Daryl put a hand on her shoulder and strongly held her down.

"Don't, you were out cold for a while, take it easy. It'll wear off"

"What was it? Morphine? Mushrooms?" She eyed Daryl suspiciously and he glared back, shaking his head gently. She watched astounded as little waves of colour flew from the ends of his dirty hair. Then that autumnal smell hit her again, and it dawned on her exactly what it was. "It's you!" she said, excitedly. She got up from the floor and moved towards him slowly, holding her hands out to the sides like she was walking a tightrope. She grabbed his hands which wee held out in case she stumbled, and pulled herself into him, turning her head so her ear hit his chest.

* * *

"You smell like thanksgiving, and New England in Fall," Daryl watched her eyes widen as she looked at him again, face lit up with excitement. He'd been worried she'd turn on him, attack him, and to be fair she had, for a single split second she turned against him. But now she was experiencing the world as he knew it, and it pleased him that she was as excited as he had been when he was first turned.

"You smell like rain on a hot day" he said, losing himself in this moment, even if she did think she was high, it was nice to share these things with her. She smiled coyly at him.

"You smell good. So good" She buried her face into his chest again, holding on to his shirt in her fists, and inhaled deeply. She looked up at him and her face turned from blissful to petrified in a moment.

His fangs had extended, and his dick had hardened as she breathed him in, and in such close proximity it was a reaction he couldn't have helped. She was full of his blood, and until the power wore off, they would be connected, intrinsically. He took a step back, pushed her away as softly as he could, and she glared with wide eyes at his mouth. He retracted his fangs and stood looking away from her. She didn't yell, she didn't scream and run away. She just watched him carefully.

"It'll wear off" she said flatly, looking him over as he again dared to look at her. "I don't want it to wear off" She stepped back from him again. "I don't want this feeling to end, I feel so full of power, and passion... And everything is new and more beautiful. What did you do to  
Me?" Daryl looked at her carefully before he answered. He hadn't expected this reaction.

She wasn't scared, petrified and  
Screaming, running into the night. He'd let his fangs drop and she hadn't even mentioned it. His cock was still straining against his jeans and it was a fight not to just rip her clothes off and take advantage of the high she was on.

But highs were Followed by come Downs, And he reckoned hers might be a bad one. Did he want her to hit the floor like a tonne of bricks with the fact he was a Rapist vampire on her mind? No. He couldn't allow that.

"Evie, ya gonna drink some water N ya gonna go to sleep. Ya need rest." She cocked her head at him.

"You don't rest." She said, looking around her in wonder still. "You don't sleep, you don't die. Fuck if you were cold as ice and had no heartbeat I'd say you were a vampire but I felt it myself, your hot, and just as alive as me." Daryl put his hands to his head, torn clear in two.

Here she was, on the verge of knowing everything, and in an hour, maybe less, her heart and her kidneys would have cleaned out every ounce of him from her blood. They'd no longer be connected, perhaps she'd be scared.

"Go to sleep, Evie" he said, turning away from her, and walking to the back of the freight car. 

* * *

 She woke with a start in the cold blackness of the freight car. Daryl lying beside her, breathing steadily.

She looked at her arm, it didn't glow. She sat up and felt the bandages on her waist.

She struggled between her dream within a dream and reality for a few more moments before Daryl woke up. He sat up beside her and a cold shiver shook her body.

"You need to tell me what happened," she said "because I don't know what was real and what was induced by the pain of that bolt in my side" She smiled weakly and Daryl put a hand on her thigh, giving her a gentle squeeze.

"Ya sure were mumblin' a lot, thought fever might be settin' in"  
 

 


	12. Chapter 12

_Shoulda told 'er baby brother. Shoulda let it all out, now, when she find out, she ain't gonna trust ya no more. Then what? Alone again jus' like always._

They walked along the train tracks, Evie was asking him questions he answered without thinking. All the while Merle taunted in his head.

_Gon' be alone, li'l one, she'll go runnin', n then what ya gonna do? Shoulda tol' her, then ya'd be happy. I's'all I want for ya, happiness. It's why I turnt ya, why I made ya in my own image._

Daryl shook his head to clear Merle away, but he could hear him laughing, guffawing, at himself way back there.

"Did you have a brother or sister?" He looked at Evie beside him and smiled

"Yeah, big brother called Merle." She nodded sadly.

"Did you lose him?"

_Lose me? I got fuckin' eaten by dead head assholes after that asshole_ _Guv'ner left me to bleed out, n Darylina here shot me in the face._

"We were together for a long time after, found Rick's group, but he... He's gone now" Evie sighed.

"I'm sorry. I guess it's always the way. Ain't no point loving anyone these days. It won't last, and you just get hurt, left behind." Daryl turned to her sharply and grabbed her forearm, stopping her mid step.

_I agree, heh heh heh_

"Don't say that." He said sharply "ya wanna just feel Nothing for the rest of ya existence and then die alone?" Evie stared at him wide eyed, then looked at her feet and shook her head. Her huge auburn hair covering her face.

"No." She said to her boots "but, what's worse? Leaving or being left?" Daryl let her arm go and sighed.

"Evie, maybe we should change the subject" she looked at him a moment before shrugging.

"It's a valid question" Daryl Rolled his eyes and turned to Walk again.

"It's depressing." Evie caught him up and fell Into stride with him. He chewed his lip and looked at her out the corner of his eye. "Someone once told me I would be the last man standing." Evie looked up at him and he shrugged shaking his head "scared the damn shit outta me"

_True though. Ya gonna be all alone for the rest of forever if ya don't tell 'er what y'are. Maybe she'll let ya turn'er, then y'all can be together forever._

"No!" Evie stopped with her foot in mid air, looking on the ground as if she might step on a land mine.

"Er, no what?" She asked him, slowly putting her foot on the rail sleeper beneath her, looking at him like he was crazy.

"Ghosts" he said, continuing to walk "in my head, that's all. Maybe I need some food" it wasn't a lie, colour was starting to fade at the edges of his vision.

"Mmm" she contemplated. "I could eat." She looked around her, walking carefully on the tracks so she didn't tumble. "Should I be worried, about Joe and his cronies?" Daryl shook his head gently, looking ahead. The tracks were about to curve and he'd already decided they should stay on them.

"No. They think ya dead, that's enough for guys like that. They din't know I could save ya life. They don't care. One for one, eye for an eye. " he shrugged, still not looking at her, Merle's words still ringing in his head. He knew, really, they were his own deep thoughts in Merle's voice. He wondered why Merle, not any of the other hundred people who were gone, but he loved Merle the most, he missed Merle most, and Merle knew him like no one else ever had or will.

_Li'l old ' me? I reckon if ya get to know ya baby girl there, ya won't need me anymore._

* * *

 Evie swung her pack around to her front and began rummaging inside, sure there were some leftovers from Daryl's latest expedition. Just squirrel bits and some possum, but food was food.

Her hand glanced over the bolt she'd been adamant to keep hold of, and little tingles shot up her fingers like electricity. A flashback from her dream came to her, Daryl shining like the moon, with teeth like a wolf, and she shook it away, finding what she wanted.

"Think fast" she called to Daryl, throwing him one of the small hand wrapped packages of meat. He did think fast, catching it almost before she realised she had let It fly. She narrowed her eyes at him, there was definitely something about him she couldn't put her finger on, and her dreams hadn't helped. What with Freya promising her an angel, and his jacket with the wings. She rubbed at her face with her free hand, she needed to eat. She unwrapped the second package and found some bloody entrails and squirrel breast.

Ooh yum

She closed her eyes and held her breath, popping what she assumed was a liver in her mouth and swallowed it whole. It slid down like liquid. She opened her eyes and noticed Daryl gawking at her with a smile on his face. She cocked an eye brow at him and sucked the blood from her fingers. Daryl turned away and continued walking.

She laughed at herself, shaking her head and feeling foolish. She walked on, chucking the rest of her food back in the bag and swing it over her body again, no longer feeling hungry.

That kiss though, soft and wanting, making her feel like the only woman alive. She laughed to herself again, for all they knew she was.

"I feel better when there's walkers" she said, falling in stride with Daryl again. He turned to her still walking. He raised one eyebrow, his face confused.

"Ya do?" He grunted at her, and she nodded and shrugged at the same time. She put a hand near her head and moved it gently

"No time to think if you're fighting for your life" she said as she gestured. "Or the lives of others" Daryl grunted again, and she was unsure if it was approval, agreement, or a sarcastic laugh.

* * *

 They walked on a few more miles in silence when Evie spoke up again.

"What was your first time like?"

  
_Chocolate brown eyes and red lips. A girl who called him cowboy and rode him like a rodeo stag. A girl who had no idea what she was getting into_

"Excuse me?" He answered her, a lilt to his voice like he was trying to keep laughter at bay. He looked at Evie, whose cheeks had turned pink, and she was trying to hide behind her sunset hair.

"Oh god! No, your first walker kill, shit. This is what I mean about too much thinking." She shrugged peeking from around her curls "to me this is mid conversation, sorry." He shrugged, still smirking.

"Ya know, I'm not sure I remember there've been so many since then." He sounded wistful, even to his own ears. He shot a quick glance at Evie, but she just looked thoughtful. "Gettin' dark" he said, to try and change the subject. "Might be another one a those train cars we can hold up in. S'gonna be a cold one" he looked at the cloudless sky and Evie looked up too.

"All we talk about is food and shelter" she mused, "jeez we had no idea how lucky we were" Daryl snorted at that. He didn't feel lucky, he felt cursed his whole life.

He watched her, looking at the sky, hair still aglow despite the falling darkness. She reached out to him, and took his hand, and Beth flashed in his mind again. He closed his eyes and breathed Evie in, if only to clear his head of the nightmares he'd already been through.

* * *

 

"Fall" she said, almost to herself, as Daryl took a deep breath beside her "crunching leaves and harvest moons" she stopped herself. It was a dream Evie, she reprimanded. No one smells like fucking leaves except... She sniffed,

"Can you smell that?" She said loud enough for Daryl to hear, and his eyes shot open, and he sniffed the air purposefully. "Smells like roadworks" she continued, confused and shaken. Daryl shook his hand free of hers and turned on the spot, then began to creep off the tracks hunkered low and moving slowly. Caught up in the moment she followed, the smell got stronger as they moved toward it, and fear made her heart hammer in her chest.

Her breath came in sharp bursts as she struggled to keep up with Daryl who had begun to sprint.

"Wait!" She tried, but her voice was lost in her panic. She slowed a little as she heard something, very distant, but unmistakable.

"Shit I was thinkin' of turnin' in for the night, On New Years EVE!" she didn't wait to hear any more, a sudden burst of energy shot through her and she darted forward, ignoring every instinct telling her to turn on her heel and get out of there.

"You want blood, I get it" She stopped, hearing Daryl bartering with those men, but unable to see them. She shoved her own hands over her mouth to keep from yelling out and letting everyone know she was there.

"Y'already shot Evie, that not enough?" She heard Joe and his boys laughing.

"You don't get it son. That was for Len! But this guy right here, he killed Lou, different fight my friend. Eye for an eye, am I right?" Without thinking Evie got up and pushed her way through the bushes where she had hidden herself from view. she couldn't listen to this, these threats to Daryl and his family. She stepped slowly out of the shadows, shaking with fear and with anger. She held her gun in both hands, worried she might drop it.

"Well, looks like you failed on count one." She said, loudly and trembling. "You get a B for effort on that though." She felt all eyes turn on her as she stood in front of them, mouths fell open and only Joe seemed to keep composure.

"Well lookit that!" He exclaimed in wonder "the bitch lives!"

"Put the gun down Joe" she said calmer than she felt. He just laughed at her, making her angrier.

"Daryl says these are good people. It's a lie! A goddammed lie!" He looked around at his gawking men, not moving his gun from the head of the bearded, scared looking man he held on the floor.

Evie had time wonder if that was Carl or Rick. Had to be one of them. The beautiful woman must have been Michonne. She turned her head to look at Daryl when suddenly a shot rang out and Daryl's head flew back. He hit the ground, crumbling like a bag of sand split up the middle. Two of Joe's men rushed forward and she tried to ward them off, letting off her two last bullets into their faces as she rushed to Daryl's side.

She let the fight go on around her as she took in the bullet wound to his head, and noticed his light was fading fast.

"Tell me what I can do to help you" she said in a rush as another gunshot sounded. It seemed distant, inconsequential. She grabbed Daryl's face in her hands and looked at him closely. "Tell me how to make this better!" She yelled at him, knowing there must be some way, knowing that the wound in her side should have killed her.

"Feed" he said in a hoarse whisper, and she looked down at him thinking all was lost, and that he was losing his mind.

"Oh no" she managed, her face creasing up as she began to cry. She leaned forward and pressed her lips to his, honestly believing it was over.

* * *

 "Blood" he said, pain coursing through him as Evie leant back away from his face again. She looked at him, fear and sympathy all over her features. He squeezed his eyes shut, he could heal, but he needed to eat.

"I need..." He swallowed with difficulty and gasped, wheezing "Blood." Evie shook her head, and he wanted to grab her and shake her, but could barely breathe. He blew air out of his mouth in a huff, summoning what strength he could. He grabbed her upper arms and held her tightly. Her face changed as he dug his fingers into her skin through the leather bomber she wore.

"I need to drink from you" he said at length, staring into her eyes with all he could muster. His vision was paling to black and white and soon it would just be black. She looked confused, worried for him, so he bared his fangs and whispered

"An eye for an eye" and buried his teeth into her wrist. She tasted like heaven, and he knew he'd have to fight hard to stop before she bled out. He heard her cry out as he pierced her skin, but it was far away, a mumble in the distance. When his erection scraped against his zip fly he knew he should pull away. He chanced a look at Evie, whose face was a mix of pain and pleasure.

* * *

 Evie called out as Daryl bit into her. Her first thought was that he'd turned and now she would die too. Her second thought was, at least she wasn't alone. 

She tried to pull her arm from his mouth but he was too strong. Panic set in as he began to suck on her greedily, his eyes rolling to the back of his head. She turned to look behind her for help, just in time to see the bearded man who had been on the floor with a gun to his head split one of Joe's men from groin to sternum. She heaved a little, and turned back to Daryl, who finally released her arm. He looked exhausted and elated and she noticed his glow was returning. 

She also noticed the ragged gash from the bullet in his head was closing, slowly, skin drawing back together like magic. 

"Your turn" he said, sounding breathless, and she had no idea what he meant. He pulled his arm to his mouth with some effort and bit himself with those dog-like fangs she'd seen in her dream and held his arm to her.

I fainted, she thought, putting her mouth around the puncture wounds and sucking gently. He tasted like a crisp fall morning, light mist and turning leaves. Or I'm dead, she thought again. She sucked more eagerly as sexual impulses kicked in, and all she wanted to do was be full of him in every way possible. But he pushed her head away, and she looked around her with wonder at the colour and sounds and smells of the world.

"Enough" he said gently, now healed completely, as was her wrist, which she looked at with awe.

"How" she started, but Daryl shook his head firmly.

"We'll talk later. My family need me"

"But I" Evie tried to hold him down with her as he stood to leave her side. He looked at her, and pulled her hands off his arms very gently

"Evie, Now is not the time. We will talk, I promise. Keep the awe and wonderment to a minimum just while we get these guys sorted out, k?" She looked behind her at the bearded man, the beautiful black lady, and the boy she'd not noticed before. She could smell strawberries and pine, and oak. It was wonderful. She knew instantly that oak and pine were connected, father and son. Rick and Carl. She looked back at Daryl and nodded a single affirmative she'd picked up from him on their travels.

"I'll help you" she said, standing swiftly. "They're gonna be my family too"


	13. Chapter 13

Rick was covered in blood when they met formally for the first time, and she licked her lips as she looked at him, wondering if he'd taste like acorns, seeing as he smelled so much like oak. He didn't glow, which she found a disappointment, but he smelled safe, which was as odd a concept as she'd ever heard.

"She's been with me a while." Daryl said to Rick, and Evie thought he looked crazy and suspicious, half mad and paranoid too. She gave him a tight lipped smile.

"How many walkers you killed" Rick asked her grimly, threatening in his tone. Evie looked up at Daryl beside her, who nodded and said

"I asked her the questions, she's good" Rick looked at Daryl as if he didn't recognise him for a moment, but his face cleared and he nodded back at him.

"Ok. Alright. I'm Rick, in the car are my son, Carl, and Michonne, one of our group." He looked around him and turned again to Daryl "The bodies" he said, and Evie piped up again.

"Maybe me and Daryl can deal with them while you get some rest. Be morning soon" she said, looking at Daryl very purposefully.

"Thank you" Rick managed, still dazed, and turned without another word to the vehicle behind him which had flat tyres and footprints on the roof.

Evie turned to the dead that lay at their feet and huffed a sigh.

"Quite a night" she grabbed Joe's hands and began to drag him, thinking he'd be heavy, but she had a surge of power in her.

"Sure was." Daryl grabbed joes feet and they carried him a little way from the car, "listen," Daryl managed, dropping Joe's feet "they don't know. No one knows." Evie nodded, not saying anything. "Ya probably have a lot of questions." She laughed humourlessly.

"Yeah, you could say that." She looked down at Joe and chewed her lip. "What is it?" She asked him. "What are you?" It was all remarkably conversational. She took her knife from her belt and stabbed Joe in the temple to be sure. He smelt of death and tar and she wrinkled her nose.

"Vampire" Daryl said, as if he'd said his name or they were talking of the weather. She nodded slowly.

"But, the sun..." She stopped and gasped "you bit me! Am I..." Daryl took her arm firmly, stopping her in her tracks as they approached the next of Joe's men.

"It doesn't work like that. Ya still human. The blood we shared has connected us, like, I can feel ya, in my body, and you can feel me. We ain't telepathic or nothin' crazy" she laughed again, like that was the crazy part! "But..." He continued over her "I will always know if you need me. Same for you." He grabbed Billy by the feet and began to drag him away. Evie noticed he had no face, skull and brain were oozing out of the hole where his face should have been. There'd be no need to stab him in the head. No need to get too close to that awful putrid melting road smell.

"Are there others?" She was waiting for the shock, the fear, the disbelief to kick in, but it didn't, it never came. Maybe living with the walking dead had numbed her sense of what was real and what was fantasy. Daryl shook his head.

"Nah, I think I'm it. Used to feel others, you know? Now it's all kinda _blank_." Evie sighed.

"How long will this feeling last?" She asked him as he threw Billy on top of Joe like he was nothing but a rag. "I mean, this high feeling, this animal like sense of hearing and smell..." She looked at him, He practically shone now she had had so much of his blood. His skin was flush, too. Pinker than she'd seen it before. "How long will all I can think about be sex and blood swapping" she looked away from him, cheeks warming as she tried not to imagine him naked. Daryl was next to her in an instant and took her chin so he could look at her.

"How long d'ya want it to last?" He asked her very seriously. She opened her mouth and closed it again, not sure how to continue, not being able to think of anything but his mouth so close to hers. She took a breath, inhaling the scent of him and sighed it out again.

"Always" she whispered, leaning in as though to kiss him. He smiled and gently held her back.

"We have work to do" He said, his eyes narrow, and she nodded at him, feeling like she'd suddenly come to her senses.

* * *

 They sat together and watched the flames as Joe and his men burned. she picked at her fingernails and Daryl had his knees in the crooks of his elbows, hands held together. The sun was just thinking about rising in the distance. To Evie the flames were blue and gold, she'd never been so fascinated by fire in her life, and wondered if this was what arsonists saw.

"Who made you?" she asked him quietly, not wanting to disturb the peace she could feel now. Daryl didn't answer at first, just looked into the flames as she did. She glanced at him, and could see the reflection of the blues and golds in his eyes. she caught herself before she sighed audibly, though he was more beautiful now than she'd ever seen him.

"Merle" he said finally. Evie frowned.

"But Merle's _dead_ " Daryl nodded sadly. He let his legs lie flat and leaned back on his hands.

"Yeah. We ain't immortal. Nothin' you ever saw on the TV or read in a book is real, well most of it ain't" He sat up again, turning to her. "If we bleed out, we're done for, and if we're too sick to heal, like my head wound before, without blood we die" Evie nodded, drinking all the new information in. She liked when he talked. In her state of bliss, his blood coursing through her, he sounded like bird song and tinkling wind chimes. "What surprised me was that, alright, Merle bled out or whatever, but when he died he turned, like everyone else." Evie had no answer for that.

They sat in silence a while, just watching the flames lick and chase around the bodies which were rapidly depleting. Evie still had a thousand questions, but the silence was wonderful. Still the disbelief didn't kick in. She began to think it just wouldn't. When Daryl's hand reached out to hers she smiled, but didn't turn away from those flames. He squeezed, and she squeezed back, and a lightning bolt shiver went down her spine. She turned to Daryl and he was already staring at her. She took in his navy eyes, his nose, his lips, and her lips parted a touch in anticipation of what might happen next.

"Y'ain't like the others" He said quietly, and she smiled confused

"What do you mean?" He shrugged at her, looking confused himself, eyes creased, mouth turned up on one corner.

"I don't know. It's like, ya glow. No one else glows. N that smell, it's like rain, it come off ya in waves. Everyone has their scent but you... ya overwhelming" In her minds eye Evie saw her pouncing on him, kissing him passionately and the pair of them shedding clothes in seconds, but instead, in reality, she crawled forward towards him, inching slowly and carefully.

She took his face in her hands and kissed him gently, he began to return the favour, hungrily pushing her mouth open with his and slipping his tongue against hers.

but then he pulled back, pushed her firmly away.

"Ya should get some rest," He said, not looking at her "Rick'll wanna move n ya'll be dead on ya feet"

* * *

 Evie was surprised to wake up still buzzing. Michonne and Carl were huddled together in the back of the car, and she could smell their fear and exhaustion. Daryl and Rick were outside talking, they were hushed, whispering, but she heard every word with her newly, temporarily, sharper ears.

"I was with Beth. We got split up, n Evie found me, n we found those men together. I din't know what they were, at first. When Evie n me found out we left, had to kill one a them, n they tried to get us back by shootin' Evie." She heard Daryl take a deep and shaky breath. The whole debacle had clearly affected him quite deeply, he'd been right, she could feel his sorrow. She wondered who Beth was, Daryl hadn't mentioned specific individuals in the group

"Beth dead?" Rick asked him, completely matter of fact. Just another dead friend, no biggie.

"Nah, she's just... Gone" Daryl sounded so forlorn it was hard to listen too. She looked behind her and Michonne was giving her a dagger like stare, Carl curled in her arms and sleeping fitfully.

"I'm Evie" she said with a small smile. "You must be Michonne. Daryl's told me some about you."

"Shoulda killed the lot of 'em" Daryl was saying, and Evie tried to tune him out.

"I am honestly pleased to meet you Evie, you helped save our asses out there" Evie shrugged.

"Anyone would have done the same" Michonne smiled completely humourlessly, eyes wide and seeing things that Evie couldn't.

"I doubt that." She spat, and Carl stirred in her lap. Evie turned back to face the front of the car, she could still hear Daryl and Rick whispering.

"We're heading for Terminus" Rick was saying "seems as good a place as any" there was a pause. "Can we trust her?" Another pause, Evie imagined the exchanging knowing looks.

"I do" Daryl said quietly. "You should."

* * *

They edged into the trees as Terminus came into distant view. It'd been a long day of walking, not much talking, and though she felt the four of them were good together, Evie worried about her fit into this group. The power of Daryl's blood, it's magic, was wearing off and colour was slowly fading out of her vision. What crept in in its place was a nervous feeling, one of dark foreboding and dread.

"Y'ok?" Daryl Asked her as they approached the fences around Terminus. She looked at him and shook her head.

"Everything's coming back to normal" she said quietly. "But I can't shake the feeling somethings not right." Daryl rubbed her arm and nodded.

"I think that's pretty normal, ya should be scared, walking into the unknown" she shrugged, unsure. Daryl cocked an eyebrow at her so she elaborated on that single shoulder movement.

"Wasn't scared when I met you." She said, eyeing him narrowly. It was Daryl's turn to shrug, actually looking a little bashful.

"Maybe that's ok, too" she couldn't help the smile that spread on her face, feeling like a high schooler being flattered by her crush. Rick approached them looking stern.

"I'm Gonna need your guns. Keep hold of your crossbow, and Evie you keep your knife, but we'll bury the rest out here, just in case" Evie nodded, taking the small Smith & Wesson from her waistband.

"It's got no bullets left" she said sadly, but Rick just smiled at her

"We have bullets" he said, looking sidelong at Daryl as he took it gently from her. She frowned, he'd just made her feel 2 inches tall with three words and a glance. Daryl jutted his chin a little at Rick and handed his own gun over.

"C'mon" he said roughly to Rick. "We'll bury 'em over here" and led him away. Evie looked through the link fence and pondered what might await them. She wished she still had her superhuman sense of smell, it seemed to her like a pre warning to who she should and shouldn't trust. Then, life was never that simple. The simple truth was they'd go in and find out, but of course by then it might be too late. She sighed and turned away from Terminus as Rick told them what was going to happen next.

* * *

 

 

They scaled the fence and crept around to the back of the main building. The feeling of dread laying on Evie's chest got heavier the farther they went. They headed for a single door and she faltered, Daryl, taking up the rear almost bumped into her.

"What is it?" He hissed, and Evie stared at the door before them. It was plain and unassuming, just a door. She turned to Daryl.

"What do you think?" She asked him, and he sniffed at the air. His lip curled in a snarl and she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that this place was not what it seemed.

"We can't just stand here" he said, but Evie couldn't get her feet to lift from the floor. Her mind screamed at her to run, her heart told her this potential new family would need her. As Rick finally opened the door Daryl growled "Move" and Evie finally pushed forward, following Rick, Carl and Michonne into the unknown.

* * *

Kneeling, with his hands zip tied behind his back and his ankles zip tied together, Daryl held his breath. The large stainless steel sink in front of him was full of fresh, fragrant blood from the young boy at the end of the line. despite the situation, he was suddenly hungry.

His thoughts were not of Evie, left behind in the freight car, a mixture of fear and anger in him which was her emotion, forced into him from her blood. His thoughts were not that she was right, and they should have run.  
His mind was not stuck on the fact that an aluminium bat to the head would not knock him out, and that he would feel the slice to his throat and his death would be a slow, painful, process of bleeding out. If his family were dying anyway that was just fine, but he wasn't thinking of that.

No.

His mind was on keeping his teeth firmly where they were, in his mouth.

He'd seen Rick's splintered stake, and knew that as leader, Rick needed to win this one. He would, naturally, jump into action if anything was to go wrong, but he wanted to appear normal, human, and not stand out before he absolutely had to. With people such as these, he did not want to come across as special in any way, lest he be made a spectacle of, or his family were abused more because of it. They were going to get out of this. Rick made that clear with his biting words, letting this Gareth know he was going to kill him, cold, purposeful. Rick was not scared. Daryl only wished he could let Evie know how sure he was, because she was petrified.

* * *

 

"Hey" Evie heard Carl call amongst the cacophony of noise in the train car, "my dad will be back" she looked around her, everyone quieted as whatever shit storm that had started outside with that huge explosion continued.

"They all will" a woman said, Maggie, she thought. "And we need to be ready to fight when they let us out" Evie narrowed her eyes as Maggie got back to sheering a splinter of wood from the frame of their prison. She whipped off her belt, and took the lace from one of her boots, preparing to make some kind of stake, bashing the buckle off the belt with her booted foot, and tying it firmly to a long stick of wood already removed from the freight car. She didn't know about Rick, he seemed pretty out of it back on the tracks, but She knew that Daryl wouldn't leave them. He'd been through hell to find everyone and going back wouldn't be an option for him.

The train car was quiet now as everyone worked on their makeshift weaponry and she found herself wishing she could feel him better. There was something, but it was weak, and felt a little like hunger more than anything else.

When the door finally flew open she almost stabbed Rick in the face. They all looked like Hell, and now the door was open the noise was deafening. Screaming from people, moans from the dead, and a rumbling roar from the flames. She could even hear a group of walkers munching on some poor guy who was still alive and screaming. She looked for Daryl, and when her eyes fell on him she noticed how pale and dark he seemed, his light wasn't as bright.

"What happened in there?" She asked him, but he shook his head.

"No time" Rick said, reaching for Carl. "You ok?" He asked his son and Evie gave Daryl a small nod. "We're leaving" Rick said to everyone. "C'mon" They dodged walkers, people and bullets as they made a path to the fence line. It was utter chaos and nothing was thought out, but still she noticed everyone worked together as a well oiled machine. Even the other new guys. She was watching them when Daryl grabbed her arm and dragged her out of the path of a walker, and then buried a metal spike in its temple.

"Shit" she breathed.

"Eyes open, mouth shut, head in the game" He said, but Evie shook her head

"This is no game" she raised her eyebrows at him, they were now against the fence, and she could almost taste the freedom. With so many walkers inside, they'd surely be safe from parameter checkers and monsters alike. They could breathe. She stabbed her toe into the chain link and hefted herself up onto the fence when the links let go and she slipped. Her mind went completely blank as she watched her fingers slide down the mesh, getting cut and bleeding as they did so, making her hands slick and grip even harder to come by. Hands were suddenly on her and panic kicked in, they were everywhere, grabbing and pawing, from above and below.

"Woah" she heard above her and looked up into Tara's face. "I gotcha red, come on" Evie curled her fingers around Tara's wrist, and chanced a look behind her. Daryl had his hands on her, and with their help she scaled the fence, finally, and landed the other side with no more damage than her sliced fingers. She took a breath once everyone was over, and as she recovered from her ordeal she looked up to see Daryl's eyes on her.

As blood dripped from her fingers he watched and slowly licked his lips.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: use of the 'c' word

He heard her throat click as she swallowed dryly, but all that mattered was the bright red blood trickling slowly around her finger in a large and lazy spiral before dripping, in a tear drop, from the tip. Her scent of purity and freshness emanating with every splash to the ground. He licked his lips, eyeing her hands and ignoring everything else. In his mind's eye he ripped off her clothes and drank from her greedily while they fucked in view of everyone, sucking at the artery in her thigh, his nose pushed against her cunt. It was all, everything, _Until he saw chocolate eyes, heard a scream, red lips peeling back from each other on a face that wore a mask of pure horror, blood, everywhere. Her clothes and his saturated beyond recognition._

He snapped to, and looked Evie in the eye. His heart began to beat at a regular pace. She opened her mouth to speak, and he was at her side in an instant, hushing her as he checked out the people around them. They were busy having their own conversations.

"I felt it" she said, regardless of his shushing, big green eyes void of fear "you're hungry" he shook his head at her, not wanting her to delve any deeper. That hunger could mean her life, though after what he'd seen in the dark depths of Terminus' corridors, he wasn't sure he'd drink from a person ever again. She gestured with her hand, and though he gladly would have torn off her fingers in that moment, flashes of body parts in his mind made him grimace, and he took a deep breath through his mouth curling his hand around hers, enclosing it, hiding it.

"Not now" he growled, meaning to continue, but movement caught his attention. He looked beyond Evie, and his heart almost stopped again.  
Sure his eyes were deceiving him he blinked hard and looked again. But it was her, it was Carol.

* * *

 

Evie felt rather than saw Daryl move away. His warm hand was gone from hers and she was suddenly alone. She looked around her and Rick was looking into the distance with something akin to awe on his face. She looked behind her, and Daryl had another woman in his arms. She frowned as Rick rushed past her to ask this woman a question she couldn't quite make out, and then everyone, except the other new people, Tara, Abraham, Rosita and Eugene, were welcoming this woman back, and it all made sense, another of their family had found them. Evie's heart swelled, she wanted nothing for Daryl but this, to help him find his place back with his people and it was all coming together so well. She headed over herself, tentatively, as Carol told Rick there was something he needed to see.

Whilst walking silently along the tracks, leaving terminus aflame behind them, Evie wasn't sure what she thought they would find. The last thing she expected was a small baby. She wondered who could possibly have had a baby in these dangerous days as Rick and Carl rushed forward. She looked at Daryl, and asked him.

"Where's mom?" And he answered her with a single look. She nodded and looked back at the three playing happy families as the others in the group rejoiced at finding more of their family.

She suddenly felt very alone remembering her sister, the only person she had after the dead started getting up again. Her parents were long dead and her childhood caregivers just long gone. She chewed her lip a little but forced a smile when Daryl looked back to her.

"We're going to try and find somewhere to stay a while" he said "all of us," she felt her eyes grow wide

"This is everyone?" Daryl shook his head and looked at the cloud of white smoke billowing into the sky in the distance. It still looked fierce.

"No, there's one more, n I will find her, but for now..."

"Are you gonna tell me what happened in there?" She cut him off, grabbing his hand in both of hers. Her sliced fingers now wrapped in the torn off hem of her shirt, which she'd clumsily done whilst walking. She looked him in the eye and whispered softly "I know you need to eat" but Daryl pulled his hand from hers and skirted around her to Rick and the rest of his people, and that loneliness and confusion fell on her again.

* * *

 

She kept reminding him of what he really was. He looked over and she was standing alone, frowning at him. But what could he say or do with everyone around him? Yes he was hungry, but his family had just almost been eaten by cannibals, and weighing it up, having just found them again, he needed to be with them. She wouldn't understand, she was alone a long time when they met.

They started to walk back along the tracks in the hope of finding somewhere to stay, somewhere to rest. They'd lucked right out with the prison, even overrun as it had been, and it was doubtful that would happen again so far into this version of the world. Everything was taken and everyone had their own set of new rules to live by, even if they were crazy, they were their rules.

Evie was lagging behind and Daryl waited for her. She eyed him suspiciously as she approached him, and he wondered what he might have done to deserve a look like that.

"You make me hungry" he said quietly, and she looked up at him questioning. It was his way of explaining, but she didn't understand. He sighed and tried again. "You make me want to be completely myself, but I can't in front of my family. I'm sorry." She frowned at him, and he was about to say more when she stopped him.

"Don't apologise for what you are. It's not your fault. If they were real family, true friends, you wouldn't feel so bad about telling them" he was taken aback, of course they were real family. He gritted his teeth to keep from hissing at her like an angry cat and swallowed carefully.

"It's gone on too long." He said, hoping she'd drop the subject in such close proximity to them.

"If you don't eat soon, what's to stop you ripping them to pieces when your instincts get the better of you?" He span on her, sharply grabbed her arms in his big hands, completely enclosing each of her biceps and growled at her

"Never have I ever wanted to harm any of them. Never. They saved my life, each in their own way. Then you come along... Ya make me feel hungry Evie, ya bring out the beast in me" he dropped her arms and turned in the direction everyone else was headed and continued to walk along the tracks. No one had noticed, that was good. He instantly felt bad, but she was getting to him, and he was ravenous after all the blood in terminus, after bearing witness to the evil of those people, and hungry apparently meant moody.

He sighed to himself and turned back to her. She was standing where he'd left her, looking forlorn and out of place, rubbing the tops of her arms with her hands.

"C'mon" he called gently "we'll hunt, soon, OK?"

* * *

 

As if that made grabbing her and hurting her better, Evie thought as she jogged to catch up. As if that made it ok that he kept leaving her behind now he had his friends back. She'd been nothing but a burden, having to be saved several times, maybe he had a right to be mad at her.

Then you came along.

What did that mean? Perhaps he regretted her entrance into his life, perhaps she was just an extra pair of eyes and ears as he searched for his loved ones. She chewed the inside of her cheek as anxiety settled in her stomach. She had to stop telling herself that she didn't belong, that she was nothing but an inconvenience, she didn't need to prove herself to these people before she was left behind as excess baggage. Weight they couldn't afford to be carrying. She'd saved Daryl's life, too. She had to keep hold of that.

She was completely taken aback when Daryl purposefully bumped her shoulder. She looked up at him and he was smiling a little.

"Y'ok?" She nodded at him half-heartedly in reply, more confused than ever.

 _She looked down at Freya's lifeless body, completely at a loss. With no tools she couldn't waste time and energy digging with her bare hands._  
"I'm sorry" she whispered, kissing her sister's cheek softly, before turning and walking away, leaving Freya in a pool of her own blood, a bite wound behind her shoulder, a knife wound at the nape of her neck.  
She cried for days, until she felt used up and shrivelled. She should have buried her, she hoped that Freya understood.

She was brought to the here and now when Carol put a hand on her shoulder, and she jumped violently.

"Sorry" Carol whispered in the darkness that had suddenly fallen all around them.

They were making camp under the canopy of the trees when Evie had drifted off into her own thoughts.

"Everything ok?" Carol asked, and Evie smiled and nodded. Carol gave her a small smile back. "We all have our demons" she said "the trick is not to let them take over" Evie frowned, and Carol continued as though she'd been asked a question "oh I see it, in your eyes, and when you get quiet, I know. We've all been there." She looked around her at the others "some more and some less, but we have. Who was it?" Evie opened her mouth and snapped it closed again, and Carol's hand found her hair, stroked it from temple to tip "so pretty" she whispered, and Evie became a little uncomfortable.

"My sister" she said, leaning back so her butt was on her heels, successfully pulling away from Carol's touch on the only security blanket she had left. "Freya." Carol nodded, seeming satisfied with Evie's answer. She didn't dare to ask the question back, fearing what haunting stories she might hear. Carol seemed especially lost among these people, her own group, and Evie didn't want to look too far into why. She'd heard conversations around her, it was enough to assume that Carol had history.

* * *

 

"Can we have a minute?" Daryl asked Carol as he approached her and Evie on the ground at the edge of camp. It was good to finally see Evie trying to fit in, but with Carol's state of mind he did worry what might be being said. Something had happened with those young girls, he was sure.  
Carol left, and Evie stood to face him. She was so beautiful, but she looked a little apprehensive. Her hand buried itself into her big red curls and Daryl wanted to reach out and touch them, too. He raised his hand but hesitated, choosing instead to hitch his crossbow on his shoulder, even though it wasn't slipping.

"Maybe we c'n look for food. Everyone's settlin'" he looked around himself as if to prove the point, but Evie's eyes never left his face. Her stare was intense, and he couldn't hold it for long. "I cleared it with Rick, we c'n go for a bit" Evie smiled a little, but she was mocking. Daryl felt his eyes narrow to slits, but he took a breath and pause before reacting.

"Cause God forbid you do your own thing"

"Hey" his head snapped round to her, his voice was soft but angry "we jus' found each other again, so yeah I checked." He looked her up and down wondering if she'd been alone too long herself.

"How long were you alone before we met?" He asked her after they ducked out of camp and into the darkness of the trees. Evie shrugged, looking at her floor as if to mind her step.

"Dunno. A week? Maybe more. It's hard to tell without a real reference" Daryl made a noise like he disagreed,

"Ya sisters death not a real reference?" He regretted the words as soon as he said them, but didn't have a chance to apologise when Evie turned on him.

"Yeah, you're right, I always judge the time based on how many sleeps it's been since I killed someone." Daryl cringed inside as her high level of emotion threw her scent through the air at him.

"Evie..."

"No, Daryl. You don't get to tell me how to feel or to behave. I've known you a week. 1 week. I don't even really know you. You certainly don't know me. So don't 'Evie' me when I react how you weren't expecting when you say something cruel." Her fragrance flew through the air, assaulted him with its fresh coolness making his heart beat faster and harder in his chest.

Everything around him was in shades of Grey but she stood out, like a beacon, amongst the shadows. A bright stark white in the darkness. He couldn't look away, and he couldn't avoid the overwhelming urge to just grab her, so he did.

Moving with a speed even he had never seen he was on her in an instant, turning her back to face him where she had begun to walk away. He pulled her close by her upper arms and pressed himself against her, leaning down and kissing her hard. She struggled, flapped her arms to hit him, but didn't manage, and he couldn't force himself to pull away. She brought a knee up sharply into his groin and though it didn't hurt, he barely felt it, he was startled into recognition and pushed her a few steps back.

Breathing hard they stared at each other, he watched as she wiped at her mouth with the back of her hand, and though he knew he should, he felt no guilt.

"That wasn't very nice" she said primly, and he straightened, divided inside between his hunger and lust and his regret. Her breathing took longer to return to normal, and she stared at him the whole while expectantly. But she was a tease, even if she didn't know it, and he could hardly help how he behaved.

"You do this to me" he grunted, and he face was a picture of disbelief.

"Don't blame this on me" she answered, "don't make me your excuse for behaving like what you really are. You're a hunter, a hungry animal, a lust filled beast. I didn't do that to you. You did. By not being yourself you're bound to have outbursts." She put her fingers to her lips again, and he wanted to replace them with his own. He blinked hard, but everything was still pale and grim around her, everything was still cast into shadow by her glow.

"Nah" he said quietly, "ain't like that" she tilted her head to one side.

"So tell me how it is" he couldn't. He had no idea how to describe the torn up feeling he was having. Wanting so much to drain her and save her at once, wanting to protect her and rape her in one fell swoop. Wanting to be hers and have her be his but memories of LouAnn and the terrible mistakes he made holding him back.

Goddamned Merle had done this. Merle started this whole thing, and he was dead and gone and couldn't face up to the responsibilities he had as Daryl's elder, and now there was no one in the world, or at least that Daryl could feel, who could help him and teach him, because even Vampires turn into walkers. He was alone. Even with his family back he was on his own and had no one to look to for advice on whatever it was his brother had made him.

Evie was still expecting an answer, and was waiting patiently to hear it. Daryl shrugged and reached out a hand to her.

"Lemme see how those fingers're doin'" he whispered huskily, and though she huffed and rolled her eyes at his avoidance, she gladly unwrapped the makeshift bandage.


	15. Chapter 15

Evie watched Daryl gently wrap her fingers in the torn hem of her tshirt better than she had originally. He'd drank greedily, leaving her a little faint, but offered her his wrist.

"That chain link was old n filthy" he'd said, and that his blood would stop an infection.

Now she was as high as a kite, and she was loving every second of it.

Little sparks flew from Daryl's fingers every time they brushed hers, and she giggled with each little touch.

Daryl looked up from his work with just his eyes, a little smile toying with the corner of his mouth.

"Y'ok?" He asked, still smirking, and she nodded, still giggling.

"You don't see it?" She asked him, trying to be serious and failing miserably. She watched him narrow his eyes at her.

"See what?" He asked as if he was calmly talking to an over stimulated child. Her fingers were wrapped, now he was just holding her hand. The thought struck her as funny, and she collapsed giggling again. She brought her free hand up to cover her face and stifle the silliness.

"Nothing" she said, regaining control "it's nothing" she sighed, and dropped her hand again. She looked at Daryl, who had let her hand go now, and he shone like a full moon in the dead of night. He was beautiful, a bright contrast to the darkness around them both.

They were sitting at the base of an old oak about a mile from the camp where the others were settling for the night. There was a quarter moon but it lit barely a thing as it hung particularly high above the trees.

"If you're a harvest moon in fall, and I'm the rain, who is the sun?" She asked quietly, only faintly aware she'd spoken. Daryl huffed a sarcastic laugh

"'Kinda question is that?" She thought something crossed his face, some darkness, but it was fleeting and gone before she was sure she'd even seen it. She shrugged.

"I don't know" she said quietly, smiling to herself again "I'm fucking wasted" Daryl smiled at her a little, teeth, which she knew damned well he hadn't brushed in at least three days, gleamed at her. "Is it real, or am I hallucinating?" She asked, throwing herself back and lying flat on the ground, staring up at the sky between the leaves of the oak.

"Both" Daryl said, moving position and lying beside her

"y'experiencin a hyper-awareness. If ya blood were vampire blood, it'd be an in between experience."

She watched the moon appearing and disappearing behind a few leaves above her head a while.

She could smell the wind. She could hear a hum in the air and knew it was just energy, the energy of the earth, the moon, the stars, the trees. She could see the air. It wavered in front of her eyes.

"What was Terminus, Daryl?"

* * *

 

He sat up suddenly, hooked his elbows around his knees and huffed a deep breath. Terminus. The very name of the place had worn a gaping hole in the contact high he'd got from Evie in an instant.

"Ya really wanna know?" He asked her quietly, and she thought a moment before replying.

"Do you have a cigarette?" He reached for his pocket.

"Good call. Maybe light it after I tell you" she sat up and took the offered smoke.

"That bad" Daryl shrugged at her a little, not sure how to answer.

"Worse" he said. So much worse, he thought. He took a slow and uneven breath. He wondered what she would think of him when he told her that cannibals existed beyond the walkers, and beyond vampires.

He sighed again and caught her looking at him with great interest. He licked his lips, fiddled with the worn hem of his pants leg, anything to delay her judgement which would surely come. He watched her hands as she fiddled with the cigarette he had given her, twisting it in her hand like a baton.

He had been afraid and disgusted by humans doing what he, essentially, was made for.

"They were herdin' n slaughterin' people" he said, unable to look her in the eye. She gasped, but didn't say anything. "When they dragged us out, they put us on our knees n we're going to knock us out n slit our throats" that kid's fragrant blood... He swallowed and closed his eyes.

"Oh my god" Evie said in the silence that followed "why?" Daryl looked at Evie steadily, she'd stopped fiddling with her cigarette and was watching him carefully, like she expected him to burst into flames at any second.

"Food" he said quietly, still unable to believe how bad it made him feel. Evie was silent. Eyes wide and staring into the middle distance. "What bothers me" Daryl said slowly "is that, that's what I'm supposed to do. They were a human version of what I am" he snapped his mouth closed as Evie got up and moved. He was sure she would walk away, disgusted by the honest truth that he was a monster. He put his hands to his face letting his knees drop to the ground.

But she sat beside him, put her hands on him, and whispered

"They were diabolical people. You do not herd people up, you haven't killed a single person for food since I've known you. Len was a warning for Joe to stay away, he doesn't count"

"You don't know me, ya said yaself" he turned his face away from her, hating the fact that hot tears were welling in his eyes.

"I know enough." But Daryl shook his head. She didn't know anything, but nearly as much as she should. She stroked the back of his head gently, and he pulled away from her touch.

"That's what I am." He said again, almost to himself. Evie's hand was on his head again, and he couldn't be bothered to move away. He felt drained, despite his recent feed.

"Look at me Daryl" she said, fingers still toying with his hair. He didn't, not right away. He couldn't, he was ashamed of what he was.

* * *

 

"Daryl" she tried again, and slowly he turned his face to her. She was sad to see him crying. It didn't seem right. "You're a good person" she said when he was finally looking at her. She continued to run her hand through his hair, a comforting gesture. He stared at her blankly, eyes and cheeks damp from tears. She was still high on his blood, but she'd never thought so clearly in her whole life. "You are. You're kind and thoughtful and generous. I've learnt that in a week. Regardless of what you are or aren't, you're not a cannibal. You're not an animal."

"I've killed people" he said quietly, his eyes not meeting hers "I've drained people" she shook her head.

"We've all killed people. We all have our demons." She echoed Carol's words, realising they were true. "How you deal with it is what separates the good from the bad" Daryl still refused to look at her. She sat back, taking her hands and body away from him.   
She couldn't help him if he didn't want helping.

"I killed people who didn't deserve it" he said softly. "She just thought she was gonna get laid." He wiped at his face like he was frustrated.

Evie thought about Freya, and the girl she'd had to kill to save Freya long before she was bitten. Sarah. Freya had been so angry with her for murdering the woman when they could have snuck away one night without her. They'd buried her hurriedly as if they'd performed some evil, as if rushing to destroy the evidence of some crime.

"I didn't bury my sister" she said aloud, without meaning to. Daryl looked at her, face still wet, but finally focussing on something that wasn't his own mental anguish. Seeing an opportunity to get him back to being himself, Evie continued.

"It was just us and I had nothing to bury her with. She promised to send me an angel but I couldn't even bury her. I don't deserve you" she clapped her hands over her mouth and felt her skin flush from neck to brow. She hadn't thought of him as sent from Freya for a while. She'd obviously just bagged it up and kept it at the very far reaches of her consciousness.

Shit.

She was embarrassed, and couldn't even blame it on the drug that was his blood pumping through her body. Daryl's eyebrows had shot up into his hairline and she didn't want him to look at her like that but she couldn't tear her eyes away.

"Ya think that's what I am? Ya sister didn't send shit, she's dead" well that hurt. Daryl turned from her again and she felt the flush of pink in her face fade away.

"Nice" she said sarcastically. "I know you think you're no angel, but believe me without you I'd be long dead. She said in her dying moments she'd send me an angel to look out for me and a week later there you were. It was nice that I had something to hold on to to stop me just falling apart. Now you've fucked that up. So, thanks" she stood and Daryl stood, too. "How can you believe there is nothing after death. Look where we are and what we're doing." Daryl turned to her, looking stern.

"After you're gone there is nothing else. I've lost countless people. Not one of em have come and showed me a sign" That made Evie sad and angry at once. She called her hands into fists and looked at him squarely

"How can you say that?" She asked him "you lost everyone and now you're all back together." He just looked at her blankly, like what she said didn't mean a thing.

* * *

 

"If there's a hell," he said finally, "we're in it. If there's a heaven, it's gone" He watched in disbelief as Evie smiled at him.

"I'm not talking about God and heaven and hell. That's... That's long gone for me. Any belief I had has melted away. I'm talking about afterlife. You think this is it? This is not as bad as it will ever get. We're alive. Me and you and your family. They came back. You were there to be sure of it." Her voice was soft, growing more pleasant with each word. She'd sidled a little closer to him, and the smell was delicious.

"You still high?" He asked her, and she smiled a little more

"As a pink and fluffy cloud" she said.

"Maybe we should stay out here until it wears off" He didn't want anyone to think they'd been out taking drugs while they huddled together worried about what was to come the following day.

She nodded at him and sat back down in the damp grass beside the oak.

"You think it gets worse?" He asked, sitting beside her and looking up at the moon as she did.

"This can't be it" she said dreamily. "I mean... Things have been worse, haven't they? And you can't tell me that vampires and walking dead people haven't broadened your mind at least a little bit." Daryl sighed.

"There are people out there eatin' people, Evie. That's pretty low. That's almost as low as dirt." A noise behind him had him up on his feet and on guard in a split second. He bared his teeth without thinking and growled into the night. After a few moments silence he sat back down.

"Ok?" Evie asked him, now sitting up and watching him, worried.

"Yeah, musta been a fox or somethin'" she frowned at him, but didn't ask any more questions.

"You really know how to bring a person crashing down to reality" she said quietly. "I was high and happy and then.. You burst the bubble" he huffed a sharp breath through his nose.

"Gotta stay grounded. It's too dangerous not to. Gotta be aware, all the time" he looked behind him, still unsure about what he'd heard. He hadn't smelled anything out of the ordinary, but the footfall certainly didn't sound like an animal.

"Ok?" She asked again, and he nodded, not wanting to worry her unnecessary.

He tried to think about something else, and that angel thing popped into his head. Hadn't he thought she might be his soulmate? The one creature who didn't judge him in a split second. The one human he'd come across since being a vampire who neither ran scared or sidled up close and lustful. That was the usual reaction. Those that had some extra sense were often very worried by him, and women more often than not fell at his feet crazy and horny and wanting him because that was what his kind did to people. 

But Evie just accepted him. Approached him like a human being and acted like he was one, too.

"Do you really only believe what you can see around you?" She was asking him as his thoughts ran at warp speed through his head. He looked at her, she was smiling wistfully, and he couldn't help but smile back. The golden glow from her hair, like sunset, softened her features like a photo editors blur.

"Sometimes I don't even believe that" he answered, folding his arms across himself.

"I do" she said, lying back again and staring at the sky. "I believe in an afterlife and I don't know what it is but I believe there is something. One day I'll prove it to you" the idea of that made them both stop. One day she would be dead, and he would not. It was inevitable. Neither had voiced any feelings for the other, but both stopped short and stay quiet a while. Daryl had always known he would outlive everyone. Always. When Evie came along he just hadn't really thought about her leaving him behind. At first he wouldn't have cared but now... She'd saved his life, in more ways than one.

"Daryl" she said quietly from beside him after a minute or two, her voice shooting up into the air from where she still lie. "How do you change someone?"


	16. Chapter 16

An owl hooted in the distance, to Evie, in that moment of silence between them as they lay and stared at the sky, it was a lonesome sound. She waited for Daryl to reply, hoping he understood without having to say anything else. Perhaps she'd already said too much. She wasn't about to babble on about how she wanted to be with him forever, how she couldn't live without him and that it worked both ways. She wasn't sure she really wanted to be what he was, she just wanted to be with him. To understand him and provide some sort of support to him. Really he had no one, no one like him.

"No" he said suddenly, a shock of sound disturbing the serenity. His voice was hard but quiet. Rough, in that way he had. Evie didn't reply, she didn't know how to. So she stared at the sky waiting for the high to wear off, waiting for his scent of fall to fade back down to grease and leather.

Ten minutes later she couldn't see the air around her anymore. She rolled her head to the side so she could see Daryl, and though he still had a faint light, he wasn't glowing.

"I think I'm coming down" she said to him, and without a word he stood and began to walk back to camp. She scrambled up from her position and caught up with him, plucking leaves from her hair.

"I just don't want you to be alone" she said, as they approached the camp's feeble protection. Daryl didn't answer, he walked up to Glenn who was keeping watch with Maggie asleep by his side, her head on his lap, and spoke to him so quietly she couldn't hear. He turned to her eventually.

"I'm taking watch, you should sleep" she went to argue that she wasn't tired, but as she opened her mouth to speak a yawn wracked her body, so she went and took up position at the farthest corner, so as not to disturb anyone.

* * *

 

Daryl stood and watched the night around him. The trees were dark and his family were resting. He listened to their steadied breathing, listening out especially for Evie's to even out in her sleep, so he knew for sure she'd dropped off.

Evie.

He sighed heavily and lit a cigarette. What had that been about. He wasn't going to change her into this. He hated what he was for the most part, fitting in had been hard enough when he was human but now... He shook his head, taking a deep drag from his smoke and watching the grey blue ribbons as he exhaled.

She didn't want him to be alone. He was better alone. With nothing and no one watching him. No one depending on him or expecting anything of him, then he couldn't let anyone down. 

Hell, if it came to it he'd kill himself. Cut a hole in every artery and ensure the wounds stayed open until he bled to death. Then he'd see if Evie was right, maybe meet up wherever the dead end up.

He huffed a small laugh to himself, rubbing the cigarette out with his boot.

"Something funny?" He heard softly behind him, and turned to find Carol creeping up. He raised his eyebrows at her and shook his head.

"Nah. Can't sleep?" She smiled a humourless smile.

"Nope" she answered definitively. She sat down next to him on the slightly higher ground where he kept his vigil. "So who is Evie?" Daryl made that humourless huffing sound again, not knowing where to start on that one.

"She stumbled across my path not long after I lost Beth. We just... Found each other out there. Both alone, both needing something. Saved each other's asses a couple times and kinda stuck together, y'know?" Carol nodded.

"She's good" she said

"Yeah. She is" Daryl answered a little wistfully. He wished he hadn't finished his cigarette, he needed some form of distraction. Before he thought or said too much.

"She's pretty. Gorgeous hair" Carol mused.

"She is" he repeated, thoughtfully. Carol's personal scent, like clean linen, light and airy, got a little stronger and he looked at her beside him. She looked bitter. "Are you jealous?" He said, trying to lighten the mood. She looked at him smiling, and shoved at his arm.

"Get out" she laughed "no, I'm not jealous. I'm happy for you." He sighed at that, happy for what? He'd made a friend when he really needed one, that was all.

"What happened, Carol. Where are the girls? I know ya had em" He watched her face fall, and she looked away from him. When she smiled again it was very sorrowful.

"I did. They're gone, Daryl. It's better that they are, but... I don't wanna talk about that" he nodded at her, giving in and lighting up another cigarette. He watched her carefully as she looked out around them. She seemed OK, a little quiet, but ok.

A noise in the woods caught his attention and he got up quick, moving forward to check it out, but again there was nothing there. Carol questioned it, and he had to admit

"Heard somethin' earlier with Evie. It don't feel right. Mornin' can't come quick enough." Carol nodded and got up.

"I'm going to try and sleep again before it does. You alright alone?" He nodded, thinking about that. Thinking on it quite hard.

By the morning he'd decided firmly that there was only one way he'd change Evie, and that was if there were no other way to save her.

* * *

 

Evie looked at Daryl out the corner of her eye. They'd been walking again for a while. Bob and Sasha playing some game, Rick had confirmed with Daryl there were no tracks leading up to or away from their camp. Whatever they heard, apparently it wasn't people.

Daryl hadn't spoken to her all morning. They'd eaten squirrel for breakfast with a side of roasted pecans, and he'd not even looked at her as everyone around them chatted about what came next. She chewed her cheek hoping she hadn't screwed everything up.

The yell from deep in the woods broke her stupor, a cry of help in the distance. Carl was running forward, much to his dad's dismay, and without thinking Evie's feet were flying, and she ran at full pelt with the rest of the group to find a man cowering on a boulder, fearing for his life surrounded by walkers.

When the walkers were disposed of the man threw up on his own shoes. Evie felt her lip curl, and Rick turned to her and Daryl and told them to keep watch. They walked a few feet away, weapons drawn, as the priest had made a lot of nois, and could have drawn anything their way. Evie listened to them arguing, heard the priest say the word of God was all he needed. Daryl huffed and shuffled his feet uncomfortably at that, and Evie could tell what he thought. She smiled to herself. God's own son was a walker. She stifled a giggle with the back of her hand. She noticed Daryl giving her a funny look and shook her head at him.

"It's nothing" she said, having to look away to calm herself again. Everyone around her was always so serious, and everything had got far too deep between her and Daryl the night before. Perhaps it was childish to laugh, but she didn't really care. Life was far too short for serious, especially now.

The dead will inherit the earth, she thought. Good god the bible IS real.  
She had to force herself to keep a straight face again and Rick called them back.

As they headed for his church Gabriel chatted on like it was an ordinary day. Evie assumed he'd just been so terribly lonely and sheltered out here in the woods, but the others weren't taking to him at all, so she kept quiet. When they approached the church, Rick grabbed Gabriel and held him back, telling him the group would like to have a look around, Gabriel was put out by that, she could see it in his face, but Rick was right to be cautious. Any man could have donned a dog collar and call himself a man of God.

* * *

 

Despite seeming so eager to keep everyone together, Rick, Bob, Sasha, and Gabriel trooped off into town for supplies, Abraham decided to fix church bus they'd found, Glenn Maggie and Tara decided went in search of ammo or weapons, and Daryl decided he, Carol, and Evie would go in search of water. The priest had mentioned a stream, and he was keen to find it.

"C'mon, chuckles" he said, tossing an empty bottle at Evie and drawing her from a daydream. She caught it, much to her own surprise, and he led the way to the water.

"Chuckles?" Carol asked as they ambled their way down hill, staying in the road and out of the trees for the moment. Evie rolled her eyes.

"I just... me and Daryl were talking about afterlife and heaven and hell last night, then we found a priest... I got to thinking about Jesus being a walker and the dead inheriting the earth. It struck me as funny." She shrugged and Daryl huffed.

"That ain't funny" but Carol was smiling a little. She looked at the sky squinting in the sun.

"It's kinda funny" Daryl tried to hide his own smile. It was kind of funny. Maybe not funny haha.

"Under that bridge" he said, nodding at a dilapidated foot bridge in the distance.

"What happened to your hand?" Carol asked, looking down at Evie's hand. Evie shrugged, holding it up.

"Slipped on the fence at Terminus, cut my fingers a little."

"Can I see?" Daryl shot a look over at her, and she stammered a bit. The wounds would be healed, she should have unwrapped them.

"Oh, um, no it's fine" she shoved her Hand in the pocket of her jacket, carrying two empty bottles now in one hand. Carol frowned at the both of them, but with a shrug, as if he didn't know what was wrong with Evie either, and also thought she was acting odd, Daryl put Carol off saying anything else.

They continued walking quietly. Daryl knew that Evie wanted confirmation that they were OK, that she hadn't overstepped a mark. The truth was she asked, he said no, and they could go on as they were, but the reality was trickier. Was she upset? Would she want an explanation? It was easier not to talk about it at all. At least he thought so. He didn't want to be apart from her, or alone with her right now, as the subject was too big and hung heavy between them, at least in his mind.

They neared the bridge and Evie looked down the bank at the water.

"How do we know it's safe?" She wondered aloud, and Carol and Daryl answered almost simultaneously

"We don't." Daryl moved forward

"We just filter it, boil it, and hope for the best." Evie nodded thoughtfully, chewing her bottom lip.

"I'll keep watch" she turned and headed for the foot bridge, for a better view. Daryl wanted to call her back. Being out in the open was dangerous, but she looked confident enough.

He hoped she wasn't still brooding about the night before. Without asking he wouldn't know, but he wasn't about to start talking about their feelings. The feeling he was getting from her was a dark one, but she could be thinking about anything. Whole damn group felt dark right now.

As Evie reached the top and he was sure she was safe he turned to the task in hand. They'd have to get in, and the water would cover the tops of their shoes without a problem. The day was getting pretty warm, but wet feet didn't sound like much fun.

He and Carol removed their boots and socks and getting in the water was heaven, it instantly seemed to soothe the aches from walking miles in beaten up footwear. Evie should be down here doing this, he thought, she'd love it. Though he did want to talk to Carol, who was now stooped over all wrong collecting water, she was gonna hurt herself if she wasn't careful.

* * *

Evie watched Daryl approach Carol and show her how to bend for water without hurting herself. She turned away, thinking it would be best to keep watch for a threat. She chewed her tongue and pondered how, if this was a real relationship in another world, she might feel threatened by Carol. The woman Daryl would run to when they argued for comfort, a sympathetic shoulder, a quiet and listening ear. She smiled to herself. Pathetic. Feeling threatened would be ridiculous, because Daryl wasn't hers, and she wasn't his.

She huffed a sigh. Whatever relationship they had was threatened enough just walking the earth. People and walkers both. and vampires and god knew what all else. She shook her head as if to clear it. Monsters.

She went to turn back to Daryl and Carol when something lurched out from behind a bush beside her.

A walker with his mouth a hanging and gaping gash. Teeth visible through a hole in his cheek. Vomit and black blood stains down his shirt. She lifted her knife and backed away, wondering if the mumbling had caught the other's attention yet.

Deftly, she grabbed one of the arms that reached for her, pulling the walker both towards her and to left side, and stabbed it in the temple. It collapsed immediately, but the groaning didn't stop, and she turned sharply to see another closer than she anticipated. She raised her knife again but lost her balance and stumbled. Righting herself she saw a bolt appear through the walker woman's head, she turned to say thank you, but her feet tangled in the foot bridge's rickety crumbling wood slats, and she tumbled from it, heading for the water.

The splash was immense, and she was soaked through, soaking Daryl and Carol too, who were both at her side and lifting her up before she even knew what was happening.

She'd only fallen a couple of feet, and she was sure she would be fine.

"Are you ok?" Carol asked, and she nodded, wondering why people always asked that. She'd had the fright of her life and fallen knees first into a rocky bedded stream.

Her jeans were shredded at the knees and blood soaked the denim.

"I think I'm ok" she said, gently pulling away from their arms so as to check for herself properly. She was wet through, but the day had got warm and she knew she'd dry out. Her knees were badly scraped and appeared to be bleeding so much because the skin there was thin. She took a step forward, thinking that yes, she was fine, but Daryl's arm was around her waist before she realised she'd stumbled again and pain shot through her ankle, seemingly right into her head. She gritted her teeth against the pain, and clung to Daryl to keep from yelling.

"Oh" she managed as the pain ebbed away, looking at Carol and Daryl in turn "I think my ankle's twisted" she cursed to herself in her head. Months of traipsing through the Georgia woodland with and without her sister and she managed just fine.

"Let's hope that bus is ready" Daryl mumbled hitching Evie up by the waist and holding on to her hand over his shoulder.

"C'n Ya walk like this?" He asked and she nodded in reply.

"Sorry" she said quietly, apologising to Carol who was now carrying what she could of their water alone, "I didn't see the second one creeping up on me" Carol shook her head.

"Don't worry, it's not your fault." She rattled the four bottles together "we'll just take it easy"


	17. Chapter 17

Daryl tightened up his hold on Evie's waist, and kept eyeing her sideways. She was struggling to keep up with him and he'd already slowed down.

"Strugglin'?" He asked her, but she stoically shook her head, gritting her teeth

"I can manage" He was tempted to offer her a piggy back, but unlike Beth he knew Evie wouldn't go for it. She'd rather limp along slowly under her own steam.   
Beth. He sighed inwardly, wondering if she knew how much she'd done for him, wherever she was.

I'll find ya, Beth, I owe ya that much.

The feeling of Evie's too narrow waist under his hand was both a comfort and a worry, but the sweet smell of summer corn was a memory he couldn't shift. Cornflower blue eyes all innocence and naïveté.

He cleared his throat and hefted Evie up again though she wasn't lagging too badly now.

"We should check out this car" Carol said, rushing forward to an abandoned vehicle he hadn't noticed. He needed to stop zoning out like that.

Slowly he and Evie caught up, and he rested her against the car.

"Ok?" he checked, and she rolled her eyes at him as Carol's head popped up from the driver's side behind her.

"Battery's dead" she said, sounding miserable.

"We get to come back, Carol." Daryl said to her quietly. "You saved us all by yourself, you should hold on to that" Carol popped the boot lid of the car she'd found and her face lit up a little.

"Battery pack" she said, moving into the car again to pop the hood. "We should be dead. All of us" Daryl could see Evie listening with interest.

"Hey, we ain't dead" Daryl said to Carol as they came back around to Evie's side. "We all get to start over. All of us, together" Carol put the cars battery into battery pack and slammed the trunk with force.

"We should leave this here in case things at the church go south"she said bitterly. She picked up the four bottles of water with a grimace and Evie reached out her hand.

"I can carry one of those" she said, but Carol just gave her a sour look and began the walk back to church.

Daryl took Evie around the waist and she looked at him quizzically. He contemplated explaining, but decided against it within earshot.

"Long story" he said quietly, placing her arm over his shoulder again and taking most of her weight with ease. "We'll talk, but another time." He looked at her from the corner of his eye, even in pain, grimacing like she was, she still looked surreally beautiful. She looked right back at him, catching his eye, and asked quietly

"We're OK, right?" He thought about it, taking a few testing steps forward, and nodded.

"Yeah. We gotta be" she smiled

"We get to start over" he felt a smile toying with his own lips and nodded again.

"That's right" he said, facing front to avoid her big green eyes, to save himself from getting lost in her.

He tried to think of something else, but when all that came to him was Beth, he wondered why he even bothered. Why Beth was so much on his mind.

"C'mon" he huffed, feigning a struggle with her weight "what ya been eatin'?"

* * *

 

Evie laughed, threw her head back and laughed at the blue sky above them

"Cake!" She said smiling, dreaming that it was true. "Ben and Jerry's. Cookies." She sighed. She didn't care about any of those things, not really. Daryl was trying to steer her thoughts, and she'd fallen for it. She narrowed her eyes, concentrating on moving forward as smoothly as she could. Pain in her ankle pulsed through her whole body with her heartbeat.

"If I could get some strong painkillers, I'll be set by tomorrow" she said pointedly, checking Daryl out from the corner of her eye. Daryl's eyes narrowed.

"I can't heal a sprain" he answered, lifting her a little more, taking more of her weight and practically carrying her along. Evie chewed her tongue.

"Not quite what I was thinking" she said thoughtfully. She was thinking hard drugs. Something to kill the pain enough so that she could walk would stop her getting stiff. She was a liability now, it wasn't how she wanted to be seen. The new girl, can't even use her own two feet. When walkers come, throw her to them and run.

She shook the thoughts away and Daryl looked at her suspicious.

"Ain't got nothin' like that" she hummed an answer, trying to keep up and hopping a little faster beside him.

She was getting a worn out, but she could see the church, and it spurred her on. She really didn't want to be the person who depended on everyone else to help her out.

"Am I going too fast?" Daryl queried beside her, but she shook her head vehemently. The thought of Freya wetting herself at her situation wasn't helping. She'd always been the tough one, the able one. Now she was lame.   
She should be shot, like a racehorse. "Ya gotta be honest with me Evie. If ya want me to carry ya"

"No!" She cut him off sharply, taking a deep breath and lowing on. "No" she said more softly. "I survived on my own for weeks, let's just get there and see if we can get it wrapped up." Daryl quieted with a small nod. She didn't want to argue, she just wanted to get back.

The church was teeming with activity, Daryl offered Evie blood to heal her knee scrapes, at least, but she declined.

"Carol saw me fall." She shook her head "too risky" Daryl gave a humourless single laugh.

"She's got other stuff on her mind right now, she won't know" Evie shrugged.

"Still... Let's just get back, I'd like to sit down." He bit his wrist and offered it to her, and despite herself she sucked on the wound he'd made. He tasted so sweet and so perfect, it would have been easy to get carried away. The slick red warmth see me to float down her throat like silk. She was getting used to the almost immediate effect it had on her.

"Y'know, your blood always makes me a little... Crazy" she felt her head spin a little, and breathed in his amazing smell of changing leaves and cool crisp mornings.

"Watchin' ya drink it ain't no mean feat for me either, but ya gotta Kerb it, k?" He smiled a little and Evie wanted to just look at that smile forever. She nodded gently. Of course she could keep a lid on this feeling. She hadn't jumped his bones so far. She snickered to herself, and Daryl gave her a very warning look.

* * *

 

The church was a mass of activity. Outside, windows were being boarded and the place was generally being made more secure.

Rick and the others arrived from town shortly after Glenn, Maggie and Tara, and they celebrated the chance for a break from the elements by having a meal and wine together inside.

They were back together. That was the real victory. Evie tried her best to connect with the group, and she and Daryl joined in the toast, but when Abraham and Eugene had said their piece, Daryl felt Evie nudge him in the ribs gently, and she headed slowly for the door quietly. He gave her a minute, and snuck out too, realising in that same moment both Bob and Carol were missing.

"What?" He asked her, thankful for the cooler air the night had brought on. She looked at him with a small smile asking

"Walk with me a bit?" She was giddy from the wine he could feel it. No food and even less alcohol would do that person, he guessed.

"Probably not a good idea with that leg" he started with a smirk, but her eyes were narrow.

"Limp with me then" she said with a huff. He took her arm to steady her, but he noticed the limp wasn't as pronounced as before. Was that the wine, too, or was his blood to blame?

After a few feet She turned to him and whispered

"He's lying. I dunno if it's you, in me, but Eugene is lying." She seemed panicked by the notion. Waves of her scent flew around her and she vibrated with an energy he'd not felt before. Maybe wine and vampire blood were a bad combo. Instead of questioning that with her, though, he said simply

"I know" her eyes narrowed and she tilted her head to one side.

"Shouldn't we tell them?" She was getting louder, the wine again. He wondered idly if she was a lightweight before, too. Maybe just not a big drinker.

"Nah" he said eventually "it'll come to a head on its own. They're happy now, got somethin' to strive for" she nodded quickly, licked her lips and looked around her as if she was nervous. Her fragrance swelled again, like a building ocean wave before it crashes on the shore. He didn't like her in a mess like this, it worried him. She was flighty and edgy, like a drug addict looking for the next hit.

A noise behind her caught his attention, and his sharp eyes could see movement by the vehicle they'd left behind earlier. He turned to Evie, who was still looking jittery,

"Somehin's goin' on up there. Go back in." He said, and then he ran full pelt without waiting for an answer.

It was Carol. The smell of clean laundry hit him before he saw her clearly, and he slowed enough to make his approach look random, like he stumbled across her whilst out for a smoke.

"Hey! What're ya doin'?" She looked up sharply, having not heard him approach. Her whole demeanour screamed distress. She shut the trunk and shrugged at him.

"I don't know" she sounded torn, broken. He'd already tried to explain to her, they had this chance to start again. He couldn't work out if she was running from something she'd done, that part of herself, or from them, him, the group.

"Runnin'll just isolate ya, Carol. C'mon don't do this. You don't have to" she didn't answer, continued her fussing around the vehicle, he'd noticed water and food in the trunk she'd snuck out with her. "Carol, runnin' won't help. What are you thinkin'?" She went to get in the car, got as far as putting her fingers around the door handle, when a car came screaming out of nowhere, speeding off into the darkness. Without thinking, Daryl smashed the tail lights of the car Carol was hoping to make her escape in as tyres and brakes squealed in the distance.

"What are you doing! Hey stop!" Carol yelled as Daryl appeared to smash up the car.

"That car, it's like the one that took Beth. Get in!" He cried back in a rush, then something inside him got very scared and he literally felt Evie being dragged away without her consent. "Shit, Evie" he breathed, and yelled at Carol to get in the goddamned car again.

She did, and they raced into the night, Daryl was split between panic, Evie now taken by those who took Beth, and the joy of those people crossing his path again to hopefully lead him right to them, and Carol panicking as Daryl appeared to have lost his mind. She didn't even have time to put her seatbelt on before he drove off like a bat out of Hell.

* * *

 

Evie was dazed and a bit confused. One minute she was defying Daryl and following him at a much slower pace to see what was disturbing the peace, the next she was smashed into by a large vehicle which came out of nowhere and hit her in the hip.

She couldn't remember being moved, she must have passed out from the pain, and as she lay in the back of the vehicle she could just about see the dark trees whizzing by the window above and behind her.

She was giddy and light headed, but she was sure that was the wine. She hadn't had a drink in a long time, and she'd barely eaten more than a few mouthfuls of food in the last few days.   
Daryl's blood saved her, that much was obvious. His life giving healing blood.

She tried to scent the person driving, work out if it were one or two. So she could weigh up her options. Had she been hit on purpose or were they trying to do the right thing?

"Fuck" she heard from the front passenger seat "she's awake" that instantly ruled out option two, then.

She could smell rotten fruit, sweet and cloying, and also sweat and fear. She took a deep breath as she suddenly felt really pissed, monumentally angry and panicked. She remembered feeling Daryl's hunger, and wondered if it was his rage coursing though her now. He had said she would feel him, wherever and whenever.

The vehicle stopped sharply, and the passenger door opened, banging back on its own hinges under the power of it being thrown open. She held her breath, closed her eyes, hoping she could feign passing out.

She felt the door behind her head open, and the cloying smell of rotten fruit attacked her senses. She tried to remain still, but when nothing happened for a moment or two she opened her eyes a crack, just in time to see a large and chubby fist come aiming for her head. She turned in reflex, and felt the fist connect with her temple.

It didn't hurt much, not really, but she saw stars none the less. She closed her eyes again, hoping the man would think he'd knocked her unconscious. It seemed to work as they got moving again. His colleague, co-conspirator or partner, whatever, told him off,

"The fuck're you doing? She turns up with more than normal bruising dawn'll go mad. And if you've brain damaged that chick she's gonna be useless." She stored away the name. Dawn. That might be useful. But nothing else of any help came through.

She wondered how she might be useful to these people. The guy who punched her was wearing some kind of uniform, but it had been too dark to see what it was.

Her head started to bound an her vision wavered before her. She hadn't had much of Daryl's blood, clearly not enough to keep the consequences of getting punched in the head at bay. She took slow, quiet, deep breaths and waited and listened for any more information these men might give her.

But none came, and when they finally pulled over she was as petrified as she'd ever been in her life. In her mind she tried to connect with Daryl, but either his blood had run out of her system already, or it didn't travel as far as he thought. She could no longer feel him, it was like a void had opened inside. A Daryl shaped hole.

She was alone. Again.

The men came around and dragged her out of the back of the car, someone was waiting with a wheelchair, and she noticed she was at an Atlanta hospital.

They forced her into the chair and she was wheeled by a man in blue coveralls inside, and down the cold corridors.  There were fluorescent lights, they hummed so loudly that Evie wondered how anyone ever managed to sleep in hospital before.

They must have huge generators, she thought. She wondered how they kept them topped up with fuel, unless they used some natural energy source. None of that was important though, she told herself as she was wheeled into a private room.

"Get some rest" she was told, aggressively, and then left to her own devices. She heard the door lock behind her from the outside. she looked out of the barred window at the blackness of Atlanta all around her, hoping that Daryl would be on his way, trying to send some subliminal mind message of where she was.


	18. Chapter 18

He couldn't do anything right. LouAnn died because he couldn't control himself, Beth was gone because he couldn't protect her, and now Evie was in danger because he didn't see her into the church.

He pressed his foot into the accelerator harder and noticed Carol grip a little more firmly on the door handle beside her. Now he was putting her in danger, chasing his ghosts again.

He hit the steering wheel with the heel of his hand.

"This ain't happenin' to me again" he muttered under his breath

"They took Beth?" Carol questioned, and he nodded, not sure she'd see him in the darkness. The car in front was heading for Atlanta, and even he was worried by the notion. His last trip into the city had not been a great one. With Merle missing and Glenn taken by the Mexicans. He daren't even think of the CDC.

He bit his lip hard wanting to bring himself into the here and now. His damned near perfect memory kept making him screw things up.

"They did. Chased the car for a mile or so but I couldn't keep up" Of course he couldn't, he thought, no human could have. He hit the steering wheel again. This was fucked up.

"Calm down. They're stopping" he pulled the car up in the shadow of a building and they watched as the passenger door opened. Daryl reached for his own door handle but Carol stopped him with a hand on forearm.

"Walkers" she whispered, and he heard them approaching as the passenger got back into the vehicle with the white cross on the rear window.

"Goddammit" he breathed, releasing the handle and twisting the car's wiring together again.  
There was a definite click, then nothing. He looked over at Carol, whose face said everything he wasn't vocalising. He tried again, and nothing happened. He looked up, and the other vehicle, with Evie trapped inside, was gone.

"Fuck!" Again he battered the steering wheel of their stolen vehicle, not holding back this time, and his inhuman strength caused the steering wheel to buckle and snap under his fist. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Carol was clearly feeling more calm, and she eyed him carefully.

"I know a place we can hole up for the night. C'mon" she unwound her window just enough to stab a walker through the gap, then they got out, and headed into the city.

* * *

 

Evie didn't want to get in the bed. No matter how inviting it looked after weeks of sleeping on a mattress of dirt and leaves, she couldn't give in. It would be admitting she was stuck here and had accepted her fate, when she hadn't. She wasn't stuck, hopefully Daryl was on his way. He wouldn't leave her behind, he saved her life when he didn't have to.

She got to wondering how long Beth had been gone, he'd promised to find her, though he didn't seem to be trying too hard. That was a worry.

She chewed her lip. He'd come, they were connected. But busting out, or trying to, wasn't a bad plan either.

A knock at her door roused her from her thoughts. She turned from the window wondering who would bother to knock for their kidnapped victim. The door opened and the first thing Evie noticed was the smell. Corn in summer. And those big bright blue eyes.

Her heart skipped a couple of beats as the young girl with blonde waves hitched up in a ponytail gently entered her room. In her hands she held scrubs which Evie rightly guessed were for her to change into.

But what got to her most was how familiar the girl appeared to be, though she knew she'd never seen her before.

"Hi. I'm Beth" the girl said with a smile, despite her fading black eye, arm cast and the cut on her cheek. Evie's mouth threatened to drop open and she raised her hand to it, dumbfounded. The girl looked confused, but walked confidently to the bed.

"I'll just leave these here for you." She turned away, then turned back, her eyes sparkling like glass. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm sorry you ended up here" she turned primly again for the door, and Evie reached out a hand as if to grab her and stop her, though she was far too far away to reach.

"Beth" she managed in a whisper, knowing this was Daryl's Beth, without a shadow of a doubt. His blood still coursed through her, after all. Beth turned back, smiling but unsure. When Evie said nothing else she said

"I have to get back, since Noah got out They're makin' me do double the work"

"Daryl" Evie said in a rush, a ruse to get Beth not to leave before she knew he was still around. "He's coming for us, both of us" Beth's eyes widened briefly, but then returned to normal.

"No one gets out alive" her tone was harsh, dark. Evie shook her head slowly.

"Maggie, Glenn... They're all coming Beth. Everyone." Beth's eyes narrowed this time.

"Who are you?" This wasn't the ever hopeful 'good people still exist' Beth that everyone talked about. This girl was hard, no doubt her personality carved by all she had been through.

"Evie." She replied simply.

"I have to go" Beth said after a beat "you should get some rest"  
Shocked, and with nothing more to give, Evie watched Beth leave, locking the door after her. She'd given in, having been here just a couple of weeks she had shut down and accepted this defeat.

Evie wasn't going to let that happen. She wasn't weak to start with, and no one would be expecting her to have Vampire blood swimming through her veins.

Rather than turning in, she began looking for a way to get out.

* * *

 

Daryl knew exactly what the building was they were in, but he asked anyway. He needed Carol to talk. She had to get whatever was motivating this dark side of her out.

"Temporary housing" she said as he locked the door to a small room with bunk beds. "We didn't stay" Ed. the asshole that turned her into a mouse long before the end of the world. He couldn't dwell on that though.

"You get some sleep" she said, heading for the window, "I'll keep watch" he couldn't argue with her. The place was locked up tight but she wouldn't have it. He could tell she hadn't slept in days, he sat on the bottom bunk and watched her. Listened to what her body language and emotions were telling him. She was giving up. Her scent was weakened by her lack of self worth.

"You say we get to start over?" He nodded. He believed it, at least for everyone else if not for himself. He'd done too much, even before the world fell apart, he had too much of a good memory, to truly start again. But he hummed the affirmative. "Are you?" He could only answer that with the truth.

"I'm tryin'" he said solemnly. And boy was he.

"That what this thing with Evie is, you compensating?" He shrugged.

"No, maybe. I dunno" he didn't, not really. Evie was... Different to anyone else he had ever known. "She was there, I was there. Right place right time, I guess. I ain't compensatin' for nothin'. Ya can't do that. She n I... We help each other." He huffed a bit, he didn't want to let too much out. He wasn't even sure himself what the deal was with Evie. She was just there when he needed someone the most. "Why don't ya say what's really on ya mind?" He asked her quietly, and she turned from the window to look at him.

"I don't think we get to save people anymore" that he knew was untrue. They'd saved the bible basher, they'd saved each other, and he and Evie... Beth...

"Then why're ya here?" He asked by way of diverting his thoughts, knowing all to well how easy it was to get lost in his maze of a mind right now.

"I'm trying" she echoed him, and sat on the bottom bunk beside him. He fiddled with his hands, picked at his cuticles, and finally asked the question that was really on his mind.

"When we were out by the car, what if I didn't show up?" Evie would be safe, that was for sure. Though he didn't blame Carol for that, that was on him. Like everything else. Another poor soul to add to the list.

"I still don't know" she answered sadly. He believed her. She didn't know what she wanted or who she was anymore. The world had changed, she had changed, perhaps more so than anyone else.

In the morning they headed out again, following the trail of the car downtown. He wanted to get into a tall building, his expert vision would see clear from up high. Carol was certain they'd draw trouble. But he didn't trust her instincts with her current state of mind.

After finding walkers, men and women killed in their sleep, on the skywalk, then a big giant of a clue on a bridge in the distance, over the charred and empty remains of what was once a thriving city, he began to think things might be starting to look up. The sun was out, the day was warm, Carol had even smiled a time or two, running into the kid with the limp though, that just set everything out of whack again.

Carol's scent strengthened as she crawled back into the sky bridge, and he knew something was very wrong even before she called out to him.

But he was just a kid, an injured one at that, and what was this if not a chance to show how they could start over? No one needed to get hurt, not anymore.  
Carol was fuming wth him she wanted the boy dead.

"Without weapons we could die. Evie and Beth..." He tried to ignore her, using people, names, like that to get a rise out of him, wasn't going to work. "I don't want you to die!" She exclaimed. "I don't want Beth to die or Evie, or anyone at the church. But I can't stand and watch it happen either. That's why I left."

Maybe she wasn't 'trying' hard enough.

* * *

 

Evie woke up in the wheelchair they'd brought her into the hospital in. She went to hop up, but pain coursed up from her ankle as far as her thigh and she almost sat straight back down again.

"Shit" she muttered, righting herself on her good leg and turning to the door. She was useless, unarmed and one-legged.

She looked over the chair as if some knife or gun might suddenly appear within its metal corners and plastic folds of material. But she reached for it and pulled it a little closer, if she could fatigue the brake leaver it'd be something.

But she didn't have time, she heard the latch on the door click and it slowly opened towards her. She straightened, not entirely sure what to expect.

She was faced with a woman dressed like a cop, looking severe and monumentally pissed, and a guy in a lab coat. She narrowed her eyes at them both. The guy in the lab coat seemed small, somehow, nervous and jittery. She was more worried by him than the stern looking officer.

"I'm lieutenant Dawn Lerner and this is Doctor Steven Edwards. Do you remember your name?" The woman asked in a fast and harsh voice. Evie looked them both over again and felt her mouth smile.

"Yeah, I remember my name" she said, smirking. Dawn rolled her eyes and pulled out her gun, though she didn't aim it or put her finger ear the trigger, and the doctor's jitters seemed to get a little worse.

"Don't be cute." Dawn said straight faced "Do you know what we wasted bringing you in to save your life?" Evie laughed, she couldn't help it, a harsh and sarcastic noise escaped her

"Your men ran me over. Punched me in the head, and brought me here. Anything you've wasted is your own damned fault" the doctor was shaking his head, swiftly, as if to try and get Evie to stop talking.

"My officers put their lives on the line for you" Evie shrugged.

"I was fine, I am fine. So if you don't mind, I'll be heading to reception to sign myself out" she went to step forward, push past them, but Dawn held her back.

"And the limp?" She asked, looking into Evie's eyes "how is that doing?" She pulled her foot up and kicked Evie hard right in the ankle, she yelped and drew back in pain. "You're going to need pain relief," Dawn said over her "and pain relief is not free." Evie could only stand now by gripping onto the wheelchair for support. Tears sprang in her eyes and she felt her face get hot with the blinding pain now coursing through her.

"You bitch" she hissed, but Dawn just smiled.

"Put on your scrubs. Doctor Edwards will prescribe anything you need" and with that, she was gone.

As the pain ebbed slightly Evie hobbled over to the bed and sat down. She looks over the neatly laundered and folded clothes Beth had brought her.

"What is this place?" She asked the doctor without looking up.

"It's safe. It's... Enough. Scrub up" he said with a smile "I'll be back in a few minutes" he left and Evie looks again at the blue-grey Pyjama like clothes she'd been given. Beth had been wearing them, too. It was like a uniform, like prison coveralls. She shuddered, refusing to change, and hobbled back to the wheelchair to get to work on the brake lever.

"It won't work" she heard above her, and liked up into those big blue eyes again.

"Excuse me?" Beth's face was hard, serious.

"You'll kill one of them, then three will come down on you. Hard. You won't get out, none of us will. A word to the wise, though, they're nicer to you if they think you're weak." Evie straightened. She noticed she was at least four inches taller and quite a lot older than Beth, who clearly had lost the innocence and wide eyed wonder of the girl she'd been told about.

"They're coming for us Beth. Noah got out, right?" Evie had no idea who the hell Noah was, but it got a rise out of Beth, who raised an eyebrow.

"They're lookin' for Noah, and they'll make him pay for what he did. It's a lost cause, Evie. Ain't no one comin'. Ya better get used to that" Evie shook her head.

"Daryl, Rick, Carol, Maggie and Glenn, Michonne... They found each other, Beth, and they're coming for me and you." Beth huffed a sigh, looked like she was going to roll her eyes but Evie could tell her upbringing, her respect for her elders, stopped her doing so.

"They have Carol" Beth said "and she's pretty beat up" Evie shrank back from the small girl with cornflower blue eyes.

"No" she started in a whisper, but Beth had turned and walked away.

Evie tried to stop panicking and think logically. Beth didn't know her, she could be anyone. Maybe she was just learning how not to trust people. They were strangers in a strange place, and one of her family members had just turned up half dead.

She wished harder for Daryl to hurry, before Carol and Beth were both too far gone to be saved.


	19. Chapter 19

Turned out the kid weren't all bad, just like he thought. His scent was a give away, he found people who were bad inside smelled bad. This kid smelled like vanilla, which was ok.

He almost broke down when Carol was hit, and the men in uniform took her away just like they had Evie, just like they had Beth. His heart rate went through the roof and he had to fight every instinct not to just chase and grab the car, flipping it over with his ridiculous strength.

No. The kid had ideas, he knew those people, what they could do, and after all, Daryl was trying, people could be saved better with negotiation than brute strength. He could do both, if he had to. They headed back to the church, armed with a plan.

Daryl was surprised by what met them. Carnage he wished he hadn't missed. Though the way Michonne explained it, it was awful. Sasha wasn't coping with the loss of Bob, and the circumstances just made it worse.  
He was also disheartened by the news that Abraham had convinced Rick to let Glenn and Maggie go with him and his people to Washington. He was as sure as Evie had been that Eugene was lying, but he wanted them all to find out the truth together. Now they were men down, and they needed everyone they could use to get his three girls back.

"We make the church safe, then we'll go" Rick said. He seemed so sane. So, normal. But things changed when they got to Atlanta, and Rick's scent changed. Daryl had never noticed it do that before. From fresh cut oak a smell of rotten wood piles began emerge. Like someone chopped their firewood too early, when it was still green, and then left it in the rain. It was a musty and dark smell which Daryl didn't like at all. It turned out it suited Rick's state of mind just fine.

Daryl had to talk him down, he hadn't done that since the prison, and he was sure it wouldn't be the last time either. As second he could cope with that, had coped with it. Did a good job too, if he said so himself.

The cops were scared. After they'd cuffed them and talked to them it was obvious. Daryl hoped they weren't scared enough to do anything stupid, but that was a lost cause, too.

"Will this go, two for three?" Rick asked Daryl when they had a moment on their own. Daryl nodded

"It'll have to, they ain't got a choice. Ain't walkin' outta here without all a them" Rick nodded at him.

"Alright. Let's talk to Dawn."

* * *

 

Evie had the brake lever from the wheelchair tucked into her boot. Even with the news that her friends were here to negotiate her rescue, she didn't want to chance it.

It'd been hard going, Daryl's blood hadn't lasted, and her ankle was screaming almost as loudly as her biceps now too. She wondered if Beth believed her, and if Carol was ok.

The guy who had come tell her seemed sorry to see her go, Dawn hadn't been the one to tell her and the doctor had never come back. She was too tough for them, she was sure, and they were scared of her.

But two nights in this hole was enough to tell her it was a bad place. Beth was nothing like she imagined, and she couldn't believe everyone would be so wrong about her. This place had changed her, she hoped it wasn't for the worse.

There was a knock at her door, and As it swung in she saw Beth, holding onto the handles of a wheelchair with a very poorly looking Carol sitting in it. Behind them both was Dawn looking stern and sorrowful at once. Evie bet she was sad to see the back Beth, but couldn't wait for her to leave. Evie pursed her lips and Beth smiled.

"You were right" she said quietly in her small child voice. Evie nodded, but something didn't fit. She narrowed her eyes at Beth, whose baby blues were hard and distant. Dawn looked impatient

"Can we get on with it? We have patients to deal with" Evie stood from the bed and hobbled forward, trying not to have too much hope, lest it all be torn from her again, she daren't let down her walls.

She wasn't given any help heading out to the hallway to meet everyone. Dawn spoke firmly and quietly into her walkie, Beth pushed Carol, and she hobbled along behind, falling back, taking her time. She felt so damn useless. Her whole life now was in these people's hands. If this went wrong, she only had her twisted and broken brake lever, against heir guns.

She forced herself forward, a damning and dark cloud loitering over her mood, and Dawn stopped and turned back.

"Hurry up!" She forced herself forward, hopping lightly on the toes of one foot, wondering exactly how much she'd hold the group back if she did get out.   
She gritted her teeth. This place was making her feel so negative, already. No wonder Beth had changed.

Eventually they gathered amongst other people in cop uniforms she hadn't even met yet. The doctor was there, he didn't even look at her. Through a window in the door ahead of them she could see people gathered, but couldn't make them out.

"Lower your weapons" she heard, and her breath hitched as the door opened and her new friends came through. Rick, Sasha, Tyreese. Daryl. and a boy she didn't know. Beth's eyes widened when she saw them, and a smile spread on her face. She mouthed something, Noah, perhaps? Evie wasn't sure.

She had a moment, wondering where everyone else was, but she also noticed that Daryl was avoiding looking at them directly. Was he holding back, perhaps? Clinging on to some semblance of his human self. She hoped so, she wanted to be the one making him feel that way, like he wanted to rip people to shreds to save her. It was a ridiculous Mills and Boon idea, but she held on to it, anyway.

* * *

 

Daryl gritted his teeth, clenching his jaw. Unable to look at any of his family, in case he lost it completely. He just eyeballed Dawn, the bitch running the show, supposedly. She was wide eyed and worried. Wearing the look as though it was permanent. This woman was not a leader, that much was clear.

"One of yours for one of ours" Rick said, and roughly pushed his charge forward. A man in a white coat pushed Carol forward, and one exchange was done.

Still he held his breath. The air was thick and electric and he didn't trust that this would be smooth sailing. He chanced a glance at Evie, she looked cool, if a little hardened by whatever may have happened in that hospital.

He helped Carol out of the chair and held her tight, breathing her in and asking if she was ok. She nodded into his shoulder, not daring to speak. She gripped onto him firmly as though she really was weak enough to fall. He had done that to her. This was on him.

Evie and Beth moved forward together, Beth easily, Evie with painstaking care on her bad leg. Rick grabbed Beth and held her and hugged her. Daryl just watched her come as his free arm came out for Evie. She eyeballed him carefully before gently touching his bicep and smiling a little. She didn't come right to him like Carol did. Perhaps she thought Carol needed him more in that moment. It confused him, but he let it go. Everyone was back.

He felt something heavy over them all still, but they turned to leave, anyway, all together again.   
Then it came. The words that changed everything and sent that God-awful smell spiralling out of Rick's pores again.

"I'm gonna need Noah" slowly, incredulously, they all turned back to the team of pop up cops and doctors.

"That wasn't part of the deal" Rick hissed, and Daryl was suddenly very on edge. He put his hand to his hip where his gun sat, waiting.

"You gave us two for three. Beth was Noah's cover I need him"

"It's alright" Noah said, giving in, but Rick tried to stop him. "No, really, it's ok" Noah moved forward, handing himself over, and Beth told them to wait. She moved to Noah, kissed his cheek softly, then got very close to Dawn. Daryl clenched his jaw again, forcing his fangs to stay locked up, it was hard, not just ripping Beth from this woman's reach.

There was a gunshot.

That's all he could remember.

* * *

 

Beth's head flew back and Evie jumped as the shot echoed around the hallway despite the people there.

Beth fell backwards to the floor and a sound she'd never heard in her whole life, a sound she hoped never to hear again, came from Daryl. A wail of so much anguish.

Dawn was also down, and it took a moment for Evie to understand what had happened. She looked at Daryl who was barely holding onto his gun. It hung in his hand like he was about to drop it, but he didn't. She grabbed his arm, pulled at it, and he lowered the weapon, sobbing like a child.   
It was all so fast, and over so quickly, she had trouble believing it was real.

Beth lay on the floor in a pool of thick red blood, which was quickly spreading around her body.   
A woman spoke, Rick said... Something, but all Evie knew was the torment in Daryl. He was right. They were intricately connected, and though the visible effects of his blood had worn off, the emotional effects hung around, like a ghost. A dark shadow dancing in her mind.

She held we chest where her heart might burst out, beating as hard and fast as it was. She was incensed and shocked and tearful all at once. It could only be Daryl, she didn't even know Beth.

He was shrugging her off, pushing her forcibly away, and she stumbled back from him. She watched helpless as he picked Beth up, her hair was bloody, and matted, and hung from her head like pink cotton candy. She put her hand to her mouth, suddenly feeling sick.

Everyone had gone. The hall way was empty but for her and Daryl and Beth.

"Save her" she said suddenly, her voice wavering and thin. "Save her" she shouted then, Daryl's emotions too much for her to hold in. "Like I saved you Daryl, Save her!" Daryl shook his head, glaring at Evie like she'd asked him to pluck the sun from the sky for her, like it was a ridiculous ask. 

"Too late" he whispered.

He sobbed over her, hung his head a moment before rolling his shoulders, easy even with Beth in his arms, and raising it again.

"Get the door" he rasped at Evie without looking at her, and she stumble-dragged herself over to open it for them. For him.   
They walked towards the exit, silent except for his broken sobs.

Beth had a funeral. The priest spoke for her, read a passage from the bible, and scattered earth on her corpse.

Evie floated through it all like she'd left her body. Watched from above as she mourned the life of someone she didn't know, when her own sister didn't get so much as a hole to spend eternity in.

She felt empty, she thought about Freya, and all the people she'd not been able to see off into the light. She felt so infinitely sad, Daryl's emotions wearing in her until she was frayed. The whole group had worn thin, with Eugene's lies, and finding and losing Beth all in one day.

They were headed to Noah's hometown in the morning. She hoped to god there wold be good news.


	20. Chapter 20

Daryl wished for a bike. A car was all well and good but a bike gave him a freedom he'd never felt at any other time. But they were hunting for cars to get to Noah's supposedly walled in home, walking around Atlanta garages and hoping for a break.

Again he was with Evie, again they found themselves alone. Carol was in too much pain to car jack, if she wasn't she'd have been there too.

As it was, Evie kept throwing him sideways glances. He huffed and tutted under his breath, but she didn't get the hint. He was finding her scent cloying and unbearable. He needed to be away from this.

They stood outside a garage he and Carol had already been through, but for the life of him he couldn't remember if there were cars inside. That was new. He remembered everything. He'd been arguing with Carol about trying to start again, to come back from the chasm that they'd found themselves in after the prison. He'd been distracted, and wasn't it so damn typical that he'd feel his most human when he really could use a little photographic memory.

They headed inside, Evie worrying over him with her eyes, Daryl trying to remember if there was anything of use. They went down, into the depths of the underground parking, where the walkies might not work, but it didn't appear to bother them.

Evie's eyes, bright in the dimness, flicked over him again as they reached the lower levels, and he stopped walking.

"Stop" he said quietly, scanning the area with his sharp eyes. There was nothing here, though he didn't move right away. She sighed beside him, deep and heavy, coming up seemingly from her toes before the air escaped her. "What?" He growled at her, spinning to face her and catching her off guard. She gently shook her head, but her hands were in her hair. Daryl knew well enough by now that meant something was on her mind. He didn't want to talk, though, he wanted to work, keep his mind busy.   
He turned from her, roughly telling her

"Ain't nothin' here," and striding towards the ramp that would take them to the next level. He felt Evie drag herself from the spot and follow him, he was tempted to turn on her again, but reminded himself that none of this was her fault. Truth was this was all on him, no matter what Rick had said. But he couldn't dwell, there was work to be done and cars to find. He couldn't mope about something essentially out of their control.

The next few floors were also a bust, and by the fourth empty level Daryl had had enough. Enough of Evie pitying him so hard that the air was heavy with her fragrance, enough of never finding what they needed when they needed it. Enough of being no help to anyone.   
More than ever he'd had enough of being what he was if it wasn't going to be of any use.

He threw his meagre pack on the floor and tossed his head back, running his hands through his hair and balling them into fists at the crown. He didn't yell, though it would have been satisfying to scream bloody murder and hear it echoing back around this useless empty parking garage.

He turned to Evie, hands still in his hair and feeling like he'd gone completely insane

"I asked you to stop" he said quiet but firm, sounding much calmer than he felt. She looked at him, with those big sparkling green eyes, looking like she had no idea what he was on about. She turned away from him, muttered something about looking for a damn car.

He saw red, the colours of the world literally fell away apart from shades of red. It wasn't something he'd experienced before, and he had no idea what it meant.

* * *

 

Evie stomped on, trying her best to shake off the mood Daryl had somehow set on her. She couldn't. He told her again to stop, but she had no idea how to, and instead headed for another ramp, another floor.

"Let's just hurry the fuck up and find a damn car" she hissed under her breath. Stupid Daryl and his stupid mood swings, and his stupid blood that didn't seem to want to leave her system. Now she felt angry, and suddenly a rage bubbled inside her like she never knew she was capable of.

She turned to face him, only to find him less than a foot behind her now, and he too looked extremely pissed.

"Don't ignore me. I asked you to stop" he hissed bitterly, and she noticed his fangs were drawn, hanging low in his mouth. She knew she should be scared, but she felt what he did, and fear didn't come through hard enough to put the anger aside. He could kill her with one hand before she even thought about escaping him, but she stood firm.

"I'm not doing anything!" She spat at him. "It's all you!" Confusion crossed his face for a split second, then rage returned. She clenched and unclenched her fists by her sides. Daryl was breathing rapidly, and looked tightly wound, like a coiled spring waiting for a break in pressure, like a wildcat on seeing its prey.

But still fear wouldn't come, so she embraced the anger.

"You're rubbing off on me, from the inside" she tried to explain, but it looked like it was going in one ear and straight out of the other with him, as he eyed her carefully.

It wasn't until a little venom, syrupy and clear, dropped gently from one of his extended teeth that she realised just how far into his anger he had gone. She felt her eyes widen and on seeing her face change a smile crept its way around his mouth.

Lame, slow, and not half as cunning as Daryl, Evie knew she had to do something, anything, to keep herself alive, and to pull Daryl from this red mist stupor. She couldn't think as fast as him, and though she knew her life was in the balance, she couldn't shake the feeling of just being angry, fear was creeping in though. Seeping around the edges of her emotions, widening her eyes and quickening her pulse.

"You need to let it go" she hissed at him quietly "you need to let it out. It's just us."

"Just us" he said quietly, with a tone to his voice she didn't like. It was dark, deep, and his tongue slowly ran over one of his fangs. His head was angled slightly downward, and he looked up at her through his dark and greasy hair.

"You don't scare me" she said firmly, and his smile slowly widened a little. It was full of evil intent and fear grabbed her now in large and strong fists. She realised what was on his mind, though she had no idea why, and turned on the spot, running as fast as she could on her lame ankle away from him.

This isn't Daryl, her mind kept repeating, this is pent up stress and ptsd undead style. But still she ran as best she could, listening to him chuckle easily behind her. She turned her head to see if he'd followed and saw he was gone.

Shit.

She turned to face front again and he was there, in front of her. She tried to stop, but crashed into his chest, bouncing off and landing on her ass.

"Get up" he sneered at her "Don't make this easy" she sat and stared at him, and he was on her in seconds. His big strong hands held her upper arms and his fangs were just inches from her mouth. He growled at her,

"I should scare you" he grumbled, Evie could feel the words reverberating through his chest. She took a deep breath and stared him in the eyes. Small, blue, dark and deep. Oceans she once wanted to swim in now had her drowning.

"You don't" she mumbled, not believing it herself any more "This isn't you, Daryl, it's not" panic rose in her as venom dripped from his fangs again, hitting her shirt and seeping through to her skin.

He'd been consumed by the vampire in him. She could feel something else, too. Where his weight pressed on her his erection rubbed painfully against her thigh. An involuntary noise of fear escaped her lips and she struggle against his weight bearing down across her whole body. She remembered, far too late, the wheelchair brake lever in her boot.

"We can do this the easy way, or the hard way" Daryl was whispering huskily. He leant down to her ear and whispered even softer "I like the hard way, though, so ya kickin' n screamin' suits me jus' fine" she held her breath and turned her face away from his, closing her eyes and fighting his power over her uselessly again.

"This isn't you" she said again. she stopped struggling long enough to hear and feel him sniffing her hair. A long and never ending inhale through his nose as his head followed the curve of her neck back up to her ear again.

"I'mma enjoy this." He said, one hand now snaking between their bodies to his fly.   
She shook her head

"No" she whimpered, but he didn't stop, and her panic mixed with the anger she felt coming from him overspilled in her, bubbling out wherever it could.

* * *

 

Her scent was like nothing he'd smelled before, strong and potent he flared his nostrils to absorb every particle he could. Her hair looked like it had trapped the sun within its curls and waves. He wanted to run a hand through it.

"I'mma enjoy this" he breathed at her and she turned away from him. He liked that, her scent pulsating through the jugular in her neck. It sent his head reeling.

She turned to face him briefly as she struggled again, his hand going for his zipper. Her eyes were wide, and worried.

_Big brown eyes, full red lips._

His fly caught as he shook away the weird images in his head, a flash here and there of body parts.

He heard a scream, loud and deafening, that seemed to come from within his own head. He twitched, looked up, and the woman beneath him wasn't the one making the noise. Her eyes were closed, her mouth firm, her face contorted in fear.

He rolled his shoulders, about to start again on his zipper, but that flash of red lip, the smell of sunshine, attacked his senses again, and he thought about getting up in a bid to get away from it.

_Her name was LouAnn, except it weren't. Girl on the floor saved ya life. She smells like rain on a hot day. Ya killed ya own brother cause he was a walker._

"What the fuck's a walker?" He said aloud. The girl beneath him looked at him quizzically, her eyes open again. Big and green and lit from the inside somehow. They were beautiful even in their fear.

"Daryl?" She asked him. He shook his head slowly, teasingly.

"Nah." he watched the petite little thing slowly shake her head right back at him, disbelief all over her pretty little face.

_The smell of sunshine_.

He squeezed his eyes closed. What the fuck is that?

_The blood dripping, slow and thick, to the baked and cracked asphalt._

"Stop" barely aware he'd spoken he squeezed his eyes shut.

_Evie_ , something inside him confirmed, _the red head is called Evie._

* * *

 

Recognition crossed his face and he sat up suddenly. Evie watched him carefully, unsure if this was real, or a ploy. As he had become feral all that changed was his tone, his scent and his ethereal glow stayed the same. She could never be sure which part of him she was with ever again.

"Evie?" She backed away, using her good leg to scoot as far back as she could from him. All she knew for certain was that Daryl had been a master of disguise, hiding his true identity from his group for years. What she didn't know was if that was him, or the creature of the dark inside.

She tried to feel him, like she had before, but nothing came through, her fear was too big now.   
She tried to think straight, to think logically.

"Oh shit, Evie" he said gently, creeping forward on his hands and knees. Evie backed up again, still so unsure what to believe.

"You attacked me" she said, carefully standing, and bending to get the brake lever from her boot.

She didn't take her eyes from him, though he didn't move. He looked off into the distance, lost and confused. She felt bad for him, but she didn't know, she could never know who he was anymore.

"I..." He started, but didn't finish. Evie, feeling tearful, shook her head at him and clenched her jaw. She pointed her feeble weapon at him, the brake lever she'd spent an age trying to obtain, which now felt useless in her hand.

"You were going to kill me" she said, her voice shaking. 

"No" he replied, but his voice was full of disbelief, even he wasn't sure.

She stood on shaking legs, brandishing her stupid piece of metal at a vampire who had a crossbow.

A noise escaped her lips which she wasn't expecting, and her eyes welled with hot tears blurring her vision.

"I don't know who you are anymore" her voice broke at the end of the words, and she turned on her heel, dragging herself away as quickly as she could, and not looking back.

* * *

 

Daryl watched her a moment, trying to work out what had happened and why he'd been on top of her with his hands on his belt and his fangs extended.

He clenched his jaw, they'd soon snapped back when he realised. How long had that taken, how far had he gone?

He daren't think, daren't delve too far in case he found out something else about himself he didn't like.

He moved forward, slowly following Evie. If she didn't want to be with him right now, fine, but he wasn't about to leave her all on her own. He wasn't the only monster walking the world.

 

 


	21. Chapter 21

She picked up her pack as smoothly as she could on one leg as she past it, swinging it onto her back and carrying on on her way. She didn't know if Daryl was following, and right then she didn't care. He was a beast, how could she have been so stupid. He was a caged animal just waiting for someone not to flick the latch back on his prison. A monster, a wild creature who wanted nothing but to eat and to mate.  
She wiped frustratedly at her eyes.

No, she wouldn't believe it, it was shock, or something. They'd lost so much in such a short time. She knew better. That wasn't Daryl.

 _You're falling for him,_ Freya's voice whispered within her head. Evie let out a sharp puff of hot air

_Some Angel you sent me, sis._

She was on the top level of the car park, out in the open air and under a sun which was warm and bright. She sighed sadly and looked around her, her hand shielding her eyes.

In the corner there was a collection of long forgotten vehicles. The presence of crows behind them worried her, city vultures which loved a bit of dead meat more than anything else. What would she find back there, she wondered. But now was no time to dawdle and panic. She'd found what they came for, and if more than one would run she and Daryl could return to the group separately and they'd at least have two vehicles they could use.

She slowly crept forward, aware the area was very open, no shadows or pillars she could hide behind if danger came. She was also highly conspicuous with her limp.

Though she had her pack and her knife she still held the jagged piece of metal she'd taken from the hospital. Her token of her stay in hell.

There were three cars, she noticed, one a seven seater she really hoped would run. She couldn't get too excited. There were likely to be some surprises in store, even beyond what the crows were picking at behind the cars. She stood beside the first car, and shielded her eyes to peek into the windows.

"Evie" she heard Daryl rasp quietly somewhere behind her, but she did her best to ignore him, kicking the cars passenger door to see if the contorted body inside was dead, or undead.

Painfully slowly the head turned to look at her, all dead eyes and grey-green skin. The creature launched itself at the passenger window with surprising strength and speed, and she wondered if it might burst through and grab at her with its peeling rotten fingers. She shook the thought away, and opened the door from the front of the car, so she was behind the walker when it tried to escape. As it reached around the door frame she pushed the door closed with her hip and stabbed the walker easily through the top of the skull.  
She was pleased with herself, so far she hadn't even broken a sweat.

"Hey" she heard behind her again, Daryl. He was maybe back to his old self, he certainly hadn't tried to kill her yet, but how could she ever know? She still felt this weird impatient fury from him, so who knew. Who knew what was going on anymore.

Then he was beside her, and she stopped doing what she was doing but didn't look at him.

"What happened?" He asked her roughly, and she laughed sarcastically.

"You're asking me?" She said, incredulous. "If you don't know I sure as hell don't" she pulled the walker she just killed from the vehicle and unceremoniously shoved it on the floor. "I don't even know if _this_ is really you or if _that_ was" she wiped at her face with her sleeve, not wanting to cry but feeling so frustrated with him. The situation, life now, was complex enough, without vampiric mood swings. "There was enough shit trying to kill me before you came along" she mumbled.  
He didn't answer her, he just looked at her, and she felt herself looking back, wondering if it was a trick, if this whole thing from the start was some weird game to get close to her. Freya was right, she was starting to have feelings for him, and now?

"Evie" he tried with her, dragging her name out and elongating it. She took a step closer to him and really looked at him properly.  
It _was_ Daryl. She couldn't believe she hadn't seen it before. Something in his eyes had changed when he became that thing. Something she couldn't put her finger on but it was definite.

"You're back" she smiled at him despite herself. She didn't exactly have much choice, life was too short to hold a grudge. He nodded.

"I din't even know I was gone" he said quietly.  
Then, unexpectedly, and apropos of nothing, he threw his arms around her and squeezed her tightly.

"I din't know I was gone" he repeated against her ear, tickling it with his soft breath and rough facial hair.

* * *

 

He let her go and stood back arms length from her.

"I'm not good at this, Evie" he said "ain't nothin' like that happened before" he looked at his feet, too scared by what he might see in her eyes. Surely now she knew just what kind of monster he was. He still blamed Merle, blamed him hard for leaving him when he hadn't taught Daryl all the tricks, the quirks, and the rules of this vampire thing. He shook his head. "I don't even know what I did, back there" he chanced a quick look up at her, she seemed nonplussed. He wondered if she believed him, hoped she did.

"Nothing" she said, fast. "Nothing happened." She shrugged, he knew she was speaking far too quickly to be telling the truth. "It could have been bad, it wasn't. I know it wasn't you, no need to feel guilty, Daryl." She sighed and turned away from him, as if to take in the view of the burned and barren city. She turned back to him "Do you remember anything?"

He thought about that, as much as he didn't ever want to have that image in his head again, he went back in his mind. He chewed his lip, seeing himself getting more and more annoyed with Evie feeling sorry for him.

"Nah" he said, not wanting her to be the root cause of this. Not wanting Evie to know he'd been that pissed with her, especially when nothing was her fault. She didn't do this.

"Well, I do" she looked away from him again. "You were feeling really low, like, so depressed" she turned back and he raised an eyebrow at her "I felt it" she shrugged her shoulders at his questioning face. "Like you said, I felt every moment of your anguish" he narrowed his eyes at her. The blood, of course. They'd swapped so much he wondered if a scientific analysis would wonder who was who.

"Anyway" she said, pulling him from his thoughts. "Then you got really really angry. It was as if a red mist had descended, you know? Literally" he nodded at that. Yes. That was exactly what had happened.

"I think you kept everything locked inside too long" he jutted his chin at her

"What d'ya mean by that?" She shrugged again, shook her head.

"Just that... Sometimes it's good to just let it all out. Feel your feelings and move on" she widened her eyes at him, approaching him and touch his forearm. He shrugged his shoulders, shrugging her off.

"Feelings?" He let out a little puff of air. Evie rolled her eyes at him, heading slowly, lumpily, for the second of the three cars. Getting back to work.

"You can be as macho as you want, Daryl, but everyone has feelings."

He hadn't thought about feelings for a while. He watched Evie struggle around the car, it was obvious to him she wasn't a means to an end anymore, he'd found his people and she was still here. He liked that she knew what he was, but there was a risk with that too. Like down on the lower floors. He could be himself too much.

He didn't know how he felt, but he thought too much of her to risk her life like that again.

She stopped short, looking at the ground. All he could see was her head and shoulders the other side of the car from him until slowly her hand came up to her mouth and covered it like she might be sick.

"What?" He asked her, but she didn't answer. Her eyes were wide, taking over her whole face, and she began shaking her head and backing away from whatever she found. His heart sank into the region of his balls, and at first he couldn't work out why, then he realised her heart had sank, that damn blood swapping shit.

Sensing her need he leapt over the car, landing in front of her, behind the object.

It was a car seat for baby, he turned it to see inside, it was spattered with blood and small pink pieces of flesh. He looked up just as Evie turned and vomited onto the floor between her feet. He grimaced, but he could hardly blame her.

"Y'ok?" He asked her, and she nodded, bent double with her hands on her knees.

"Sorry" she mumbled. Not wanting her throwing up again Daryl took the car seat out of view. "You think, uh," Evie swallowed hard and went a funny shade of pink which clashed with her hair. "Do you think whatever did that is still out here?" Daryl nodded, shrugged and shook his head all at once.

"Could be" he replied, looking around and taking a deep breath through his nose. "Can't smell anything unusual." Evie smiled

"What is unusual these days?" She looked at her vomit and wrinkled her nose, Daryl found that undeniably cute. "Let's check out these cars, and get going. This place is starting to give me the creeps." She never ceased to amaze him. Starting to give her the creeps. Like he hadn't lost his mind and tried to rape her.

"The reason I stopped" he said as she looked into the windows of the next car, "there was... Uh, a girl. Long time ago" Evie looked at him openly, inviting him to tell her the story. He couldn't look at her though. He, too, looked in the Windows to distract himself. "Me n Merle were at a titty bar, 'S'what we did back then, moved around, bar to bar, he sold drugs." He explained. "This girl"

_Brown eyes, red lips,_

"She was a waitress, n I'd been a vampire for about a week, I was a baby. There was somethin' about her, a scent, a feelin'. She pawed over me, N I couldn't help myself." Evie tapped on the car's trunk,

"This is not a good story is it?" She asked, not looking at him. Daryl sighed and shook his head.

Something knocked back at Evie from inside the trunk. She looked at him then, astounded, not expecting anything to be in the trunk of a car, and he gave her a small nod, pulling his knife from his side.

"You open the lid" he whispered.  
She complied, and as the trunk opened he leapt in place and stabbed it through the temple, before the trunk lid was even all the way up.

* * *

 

Evie looked in at the creature, safe in the knowledge it was truly dead.

"Who would do this?" She wondered aloud at the point of keeping a walker in the boot of your car. The corpse had been bitten on the back of the neck, just like Freya. She sighed heavily. Today was just so full of symbolism. She slammed the boot shut, not wanting to be faced with it any more.

"Maybe they came to Atlanta looking for a cure" Daryl said quietly beside her. "I was there when the CDC was blown up, there ain't no cure that they knew of." She widened her eyes at him.

"You were here?" He gave her a shallow nod, and she shook her head disbelieving. "Wow." She looked around her.

"That's two out of three. You going to tell me the rest of your great story about the time you had sex with a waitress? It's not what girls want to hear about, but it's better than silence right now" Daryl smiled at her.

"It ain't a conquest story, I had a point" she firmed her mouth, despite having a thousand things to say. This was no time to be a feminist.

"We met in the car park and whatever this is in me took over. I was full of this insane lust. I just wanted to fuck" Evie rolled her eyes. This wasn't a conversation she wanted to be having, and even if she had to, he could have more tact. "So we did, the next thing I remember she was dead."

Evie stood next to the final car in the collection, wondering what the crows, who had refused to be scared off by them, were picking at on the other side of it. She crossed her arms and leaned against the door.

"So.. What's the point?" She asked, annoyed and wanting this over. She was jealous, and the idea of being jealous of someone Daryl had killed was ridiculous. Angry at herself she shrugged her shoulders at Daryl.

"Rememberin' LouAnn, saved your life. She just... Appeared in my head as I was tryin' to... Y'know what I was tryin'a do." Evie nodded at him,

"Yeah." She mumbled.

"I ain't slept with anyone since." He said. Evie chewed her lip, not sure how to answer. She went to push herself off the car, and her jeans got caught in the door handle. Panic took hold and she pulled hard, opening the car door and letting loose a creature from inside, which was on her in a heartbeat, shoving the door with incredible strength and reaching a hand through the gap.

Daryl was there before she even made sense of what had happened. He pulled Evie across the asphalt out of the monsters reach and slammed the car door back on its head.  
She looked up in time to see the head cave in, and she was almost sick again.

"Y'ok?" Daryl was next to her, worried. She nodded, stunned, and hummed her affirmative. She was breathing hard, and Daryl was looking over her, eyes wider than she'd ever seen them. She looked down at her self, and saw the road rash on her elbow and knee where Daryl had dragged her out of harm's way.

"Oh" she managed, not sure what else to say. She looked at the grit in the scrapes and began to ease them out with her nails. She looked up, and Daryl had turned his face away from hers. "Too much?" She asked with a lilt to her voice she didn't intend, and flicked a small stone from her elbow at him. He looked back and she watched him draw his teeth back into his upper jaw.

She hitched her breath. It was kind of sexy, and she could understand women throwing themselves at him.

"How can we be sure you won't lose it again?" She asked, standing. He followed her up and shrugged, heading for the car and removing the walker with the caved in head.

"We can't." He said. Evie pursed her lips.

"You've made a right mess of this one" she mused, looking in for anything of use. There was a water bottle and a cool bag on the back seat. She grabbed them, put the water in her pack and unzipped the cooler.

* * *

 

Daryl watched her carefully. She'd ignored his comment on purpose. Choosing not to acknowledge that he was dangerous. She unzipped the cooler and her face changed completely from nonchalance to confusion, then she turned to him.

"You won't believe this" she said, reaching in and pulling out what looked like an IV bag full of blood.


	22. Chapter 22

He grabbed the bag from her hands without thinking. She pulled a face at him and he did his best to apologise with his eyes. He stared at the bag of thick red liquid, remembering.

"Will it be any good?" Evie asked him, screwing her nose up at the bag in his hands, and the way he was looking at it with awe. He nodded

"Back in the beginning, Merle wanted to overturn a hospital. Weren't Grady" he added, not knowing why. "Said we could be the last people left, and that it'd keep us going." No matter what Merle hadn't manage to teach him, Daryl knew that his brother knew how to be a vampire. He trusted the idea that harvested blood would work. But then they'd found Shane, Lori, and the others, and Merle preferred the idea of a fresh meal.

"Why the hell would you carry blood around?" Evie wondered looking back at the car she'd retrieved it from. "Unless..." Daryl watched her get up and look at the walker he'd squished. She bent over it, interested, no longer looking like she might be sick.

"What?" He asked her, having every idea what she was going to say but asking anyway.

"Is there any way of knowing if he was a vampire?" Daryl nodded.

"Fangs" he said with a shrug. "But why one bag? More like they thought they could flush out the infection, or somethin'" she looked like she was mulling that over.

"It's not so far fetched, really." She straightened and looked out across the city, Daryl put the bag of blood in his pack and stood to follow. She was quiet, thoughtful. He thought perhaps they should get on with checking if the cars would start, but he didn't want to rush her. She needed a break as much as anyone else. So what if she didn't know Beth, it'd been a rough few days. Gently he sniffed the air around her, enjoying her scent and the moments of quiet. Watching how her hair glowed like it had captured every ray of sun that had ever glanced on the strands.

He still wished he knew why she was so different to everyone else. Of all the women he knew only LouAnn had come close, and even she was nowhere near as captivating. In fact before he let list consume him he realised just how not captivating she was.

Evie turned suddenly, not realising he was now so close behind her and she became a little unsteady on her feet. Daryl put his hands out to catch her, grabbing her around the middle and pulling her close in an effort to keep her upright. She leaned the top half of her body away from him, though they were touching from the waist down to the floor. She looked at him a long moment in silence, her big green eyes doing that thing of seeing right into his soul, before she took his hand behind her in her own and removed his arm from around her.

"I was thinking" she said, that pink colour rising in her cheeks again, "maybe we could go to a hospital." Daryl was convinced that the beast In him coming so close to the surface had scuppered any chance he may have had with Evie. In that simple awkward closeness she had chosen to move away, instead of moving in closer. "I mean..."

"No" he cut her off aggressively "we've been out here long 'nuff. Let's see if these cars start n get goin'"

* * *

Evie was taken completely by surprise to find Daryl just inches behind her when she turned. She lost her footing and he caught her so deftly, so elegantly, it was as if they were dancing. Her breath stuck in her throat a moment and she couldn't help but gaze into his beautiful blue eyes. He touched her so gently, still, just like before, that she wanted to cry, and she couldn't have that. She'd been sick in front of him as it was. So she gently plucked his hand from her back and moved away, before she embarrassed them both.

She'd been thinking about the hospital, about the IV bag of blood, and all the possibilities. They could have blood for Daryl, and blood for themselves if they needed it. If Virginia was a bust then they'd at least have something, and if not, what better gift for anyone injured in Noah's home?

But Daryl stopped it before she got started, tough and aggressive, in stark contrast to his touch, he cut her off, and steered her back to the job in hand.  
She supposed it was a good thing. Hospitals had not been great places so far to them.

She nodded at him and moved toward the third vehicle again, remembering the insatiable crows, and their bloodlust. She took a deep breath and held it, moving slowly around to the offside of the car, eyes half closed in fear of what she'd find.

"Evie" Daryl said behind her, but she barely heard him as she finally plucked up enough courage to see what the birds were so set upon picking at. Bickering and cawing noisily.  
From under the car a single leg, no more than rags and bones, protruded. She'd been told about Bob, what those animals from Terminus had done. Despite everything she expected, she just felt completely and overwhelmingly sad. Suddenly exhausted, she knew Daryl was behind her this time, and she turned, pressing her face into his leather clad chest and sighed heavily, watery. She felt Daryl stiffen against her weight on him, though he barely would have felt it. She squeezed her eyes shut.

"I'm so tired of this" she whispered against his solid form. She felt his arms move, his body soften against hers. A hand, perhaps just the pads of his fingers, ran through the hair against her back, then fell away.

"Me too" he whispered in that harsh way he had, "c'mon" he stepped back and she looked up at him. "Let's check these cars out and get back."

The seven seater started the second time Daryl tried it. Evie clapped her hands together, excited by the sudden change in their luck. After clearing out the mess she had made killing the lone walker inside with spare napkins she had found in one of the other vehicles they made their way back to the others, leaving the crows to feast on what was left of the single bodiless leg. She didn't look back. She pushed herself into the passenger seat and stretched her arms in front of her, finally things might be looking up.

They barely spoke all the way to the meeting point, Daryl chewed at his fingers thoughtfully as Evie watched the sky rush past them. Large and blue and never ending. The only words in that car were Rick's when he came over the radio to tell them to hurry, that everyone was there. When Daryl didn't reply Evie thought about doing it instead, but as she reached for the walkie Daryl caught her hand. He didn't say anything, but looked at her with his narrow eyes, and she sat back. Perhaps he was enjoying the quiet.

* * *

Daryl was thinking of a thousand things. His faster than light mind rolling over and over the same few images. Bath, bloody, dead, Dawn, her head thrown back from the power of his bullet, Carol, so weak and meek and not like the new woman he'd watched her become, waking up from his rage on top of Evie with no idea what he had planned to do.

They weren't good images to be having, but it's what his restless mind gave him. What it thrust upon him like an insatiable dog with a bone. He noticed his thumb was bloody and he stopped chewing once the rancid taste of himself hit his tongue like acid.

Beth. Dawn. Carol. Evie.

All the women he'd failed in just a day or two.

They got to the meeting pint and Rick laid out his plan. He, Michonne, Glenn, Tyreese and Noah would stake the place out. Maggie needed to stay away. Sasha needed to stay away. With Carol too hurt and the others too new, he asked Daryl very carefully to stay behind, too.

Beth. Dawn. Carol. Evie. Maggie. He'd failed Maggie too.

With a heavy sigh he agreed, and sat in the seven seater with Evie beside him and Carol laid out in the back, drifting in and out of consciousness, not wanting sleep to overtake her but too weak to stay awake.

"It's too quiet" Evie said when nothing had come back from Rick and his party. He heard himself grunt. A non committal sound he was aware he made all too often. "If it's ok, if it's good, wouldn't we know?" Daryl shrugged, not wanting her voice in his ears, just wanting the quiet, the solitude it promised, the cleansing qualities of silence were underrated.

"They'd know if it weren't pretty quickly" he said back to her, his hands dangling on the steering wheel. "N if it is, maybe he's gotta convince 'em to let us in." Evie nodded gently, thoughtfully, and looked behind her at Carol on the first row of rear seats.

"Is she ok?" Daryl looked in the rearview. He could smell Carol's soft linen scent, and he nodded, grunting again

"Asleep" he said roughly, feeling bad and wishing he could get out of this rut he'd found himself in, though he'd happily mope all day long, he couldn't, he shouldn't.

"You've got to stop beating yourself up" Evie said, every word ending sharply, each spoken as though there was a comma after it. Talking to him slowly like he was stupid. He brushed that away. No she wasn't. He needed to sort himself out, this emotional stupor was unlike him, and he didn't want to turn into whatever creature it was that attacked Evie again.

"Why?" He asked her, not wanting to hear the answer because he knew it already, because next time he might kill her, that was why.

"Because, it's gonna eat you up completely." She Reached for his right hand, still dangling limp on the steering wheel. "I don't want to lose you" she said, not looking at his face but at their hands "you need to take some time, feel it, process it, whatever, and come back from it." He blew a sharp puff of air through his nose.

"Ya think that's possible?" Evie smiled solemnly, gave his hand a squeeze an lifted her eyes finally to his. He noticed they were wet, and it crossed his mind she was pitying him again. He dragged his hand from under hers and folded his arms, looking away from her wet face and sad eyes.

"Don't you? Look how much you've overcome so far" she reached for him again, but he grunted a warning and she backed off. He chewed on his lip, wanting to snap, but he wouldn't, he couldn't, because she was right, completely and utterly right. How could she know him inside out so soon?

* * *

 

Evie didn't want to cry, but she felt so sad and so angry all at once. No doubt part of that was Daryl's influence. Why wasn't he listening? She folded her own arms under her chest and huffed a sharp sigh. If he wasn't going to listen, fine, she wasn't going to keep trying, but if he didn't let himself be sad and low, at least for a short time, she'd have to stay away from him. She didn't want to have to do that, but what choice did she have? Being drained by a lust driven vampire who was too macho to admit how he felt, and ended up being consumed by the beast within, wasn't how she wanted to die.

She looked out of the windscreen. The sky was still azure as far as she could see. Wide and endless. She frowned. When had it last rained?

"Carol, you there?" The radio crackled, and Evie and Daryl reached for it at once. Evie hit there first, surprisingly, and spoke into the walkie.

"She's sleeping, but we're here" there was a long pause before Rick came back to them.

"It's gone"

Evie put the walkie back in the dash and chanced a sideways look at Daryl. He appeared to be staring at his hands. When she turned to check on Carol she found she was wide awake, staring at the ceiling in the car.

Daryl threw himself back in the driver's seat and punched the steering wheel.


	23. Chapter 23

He had to get away. From Evie's sad eyes and Carol's pitiful state.

He threw the driver's door open and left it swinging noisily after it hit the full arc of its hinges. There was no hope, no help. It weren't enough that Eugene couldn't help, but now Noah's line was a dead end, too. He wanted more than this, there had to be more.

He stomped towards some trees in the distance, careful not to run, not to speed with everyone watching. He heard Abraham get out of another car and come up behind him.

"What's goin' on?" He yelled across the space between them, his voice grating on Daryl's sensitive ears. Daryl turned, and Abraham was not feet behind him.

"S'gone" he said sullenly. "Whole damn world's gone" Abraham looked a little taken aback, but he nodded firmly and went back to let people know.

Daryl took a deep breath, trying to control his rage, wishing he could run from himself as easily as he ran from everything else, and he heard Evie's footsteps, light and soft in the grass. He turned his face to the sky before turning to her.

"What?" He asked harshly, wanting to be left alone.

"It doesn't mean it's the end" she said softly, he shrugged his shoulders at her, and shook his head all at once.

"I know" she nodded primly.

"Right, then get back in the car. You can have a break down later, but right now Carol is asking after you and she has enough to be worrying about without you stomping off"

"Can't just leave it, can ya?" He said roughly, and Evie frowned at him. He sneered back and waved a hand at her. She didn't get it, none of 'em seemed to. The world was dying, and taking everyone with it.

"I don't know what she did for you. To You" Evie said as she turned away from him, "but whatever it was you need to get over it, soon, before you start dragging everyone else down with you." She headed back to the car and he paced a little more before following.

* * *

 

Evie slammed the passenger door and threw herself back in her seat.

"He's coming back" she said to Carol, much harsher than she intended. She was full of Daryl's self loathing and it was driving her nuts.

"Ok, no need to take this out on me" Evie turned in her seat.

"Sorry" she managed, though it didn't sound sincere, it sounded sarcastic and forced. Carol seemed to ignore the tone and gave Evie a small nod.

"Beth... I think she saved him, somehow. It'll take a lot of getting over" Evie chewed her tongue as she thought about that, turning back to look out of the windscreen.

"He needs to take a moment to process it, that's all" she watched him making his way back, elegant and purposeful in his stride. Never putting a foot wrong, barely having to look where he was headed.

"You've taken a shine to him" Carol said sleepily from behind her, and Evie fought not to turn and harshly tell Carol where to go with that. She just watched, chewing her tongue, before calmly asking

"Does it matter?" She heard Carol move behind her and turned her head to see her sitting up.

"Of course. He's like a brother to me. But he won't give his heart easily. " Evie snorted and faced front again.

"I think Beth won it"

"Beth doesn't have it. I think she got close, though. Give him time, Evie, so much has happened in such short time." Evie chewed her tongue again, as Daryl got in the car and pulled the door closed.

"Hey," he said to Carol over his shoulder, "Y'ok?" She nodded, a small smile on her lips.

"Getting there" Evie thought she was, she seemed a little brighter, but she could read on Daryl's face that he didn't believe a word of it.

"There'll be something" she said quietly, looking at her hands. "There's got to be." No one answered her for a long time, and she watched the trees in front of them, leaves waving gently in a soft breeze.

"What if there ain't?" Daryl said, talking almost to himself. Evie shrugged, about to speak, but Carol got there first.

"There will be" she said with conviction, and the conversation stopped.

* * *

 

They didn't hear from anyone for a while, and Daryl began to worry. He chewed his thumb, relishing in the rancid taste of his own blood now, and stared blankly out of the windscreen. Both girls were asleep, Carol deeply, Evie fitfully, tossing a little in her sleep, sharp movements coming suddenly and violently from her small body.  
He considered waking her from whatever nightmare wracked her brain, but they hadn't been sleeping well, and rest was rest. It was good to have time alone, without her eyes boring into him like laser beams. Without Carol's knowing looks and backhanded comments about him and Evie.

He thought about the next step, because Evie was right, OK, this was another setback, but it couldn't be the end. There had to be more out there. Rick certainly weren't gonna sit back on his laurels now, he'd be forming a plan or looking for one. Daryl wanted to be present, completely here and in the moment, when they found the good thing that was bound to be coming their way.

To do that he needed to get out of his own head, and that's where he was stuck. He looked at Evie, finally still and probably about to wake up, she was right. He was lost in his own place with his own demons, and he couldn't continue that way. Not since that moment he came to on top of her, with no idea what he had done or had planned.

He dropped his thumb from his teeth, bloody and foul, torn and ripped around the cuticles. Of course it began to heal in moments.

There were scars on his body he used to wish away. Those made before he was changed by Merle, but now he had come to terms with them, they were a part of who he was. But sometimes, he wished he could scar himself anew, to prove he could feel something, some hurt, some physical evidence of suffering. Sure a black eye would last a day, but scars told a story.

"Hey" Evie said, stirring and opening her eyes. "You ok?" He stared at his thumb a little longer before turning to her and nodding.

"Getting there" he said, and Evie gave him a small sleepy smile.

"I didn't mean to fall asleep" Daryl shook his head at her, hoping to make it clear that it didn't matter. They sat in quiet for a few moments more when the radio crackled at them, Daryl grabbed it an listened.

"Tyreese" they heard across the distance and Daryl replied

"Say again, Rick" there was more hissing and static and they both stared at the walkie in suspense.

"Tyreese," Rick said again "he's gone"  They looked at each other a long moment before Evie blurted out,

"Sasha" Daryl took a deep breath and nodded, already reaching for the door handle. It would be better coming from him, someone she'd known a long time.

As he left he noticed Evie put her hands over her face and lean forward in her seat. He was so sick of losing people.

They needed a break, and soon.

* * *

 They buried Tyreese, in a random spot beside a random road, where no one would ever visit and lay flowers, or sit and reminisce. Evie wondered at the pointlessness of this, when they could be looking for somewhere to sleep.

She chucked a shovel full of dirt on the mound forming, Father Gabriel spouting bible crap she was no longer interested in. She moved off, leaving Sasha to mourn in peace for a while.

The feeling of the whole group was a blackness that felt like it would never lift, a dark foreboding, as if they hadn't been through enough.

She stubbed her toe into the ground, and suddenly a cigarette, already lit and half smiled appeared under her nose.

"Take it" Daryl gruffed, and she did. She took a long drag on it, inhaling the smoke like it might be the last time. Hell it could be.

She folded one arm under her chest, holding the bicep of her smoking hand, and waited for Sasha to finish having her moment as patiently as she could.

She blew a last ribbon of grey vapour from pursed lips and flicked the cigarette end into the distance, as Sasha shakily hobbled away from the graveside, and without a word, every one moved on.  That well oiled machine at work. She felt like more of a part of it now, as she moved on with them, dragged her feet beside them, walked in sullen silence.

She'd passed her initiation. She was one of them now.

* * *

 

The cars had gradually died, ran out of fuel and eventually they were down to just one of three and they could no longer squeeze in together.

They walked for days. They didn't speak, they slept fitfully and lightly, and then carried on. Eating once a day meant they split up as little as possible and continued using their energy just to drive themselves forward.

Evie and Daryl were on their daily hunting trip, looking for food and water. She turned to him, her mouth open to speak after a week of silence. But she couldn't seem to form words, and her mouth snapped dryly closed again.

_This_ was hell. _This_ was where she finally thought perhaps it couldn't get worse. She'd been so sure, before, that something would come along, something would turn up and make their lives better, but nothing did. Maybe nothing would.

"What?" Daryl said roughly, his voice barely above a whisper. Evie looked at him and shrugged her shoulders and shook her head all at once. The new language they spoke, body language, was all she seemed able to muster. "Lift up ya feet, ya scarin' the animals" Evie smiled at him humourlessly,

"There are no animals" she said in a broken and cracked voice which sounded nothing like her own. She stopped and turned to him, his glow was almost nonexistent and his eyes were dark and brooding.

"I'm worried" she managed in a low voice, and Daryl frowned.

"We'll find something. Has to be more'n this" but Evie shook her head at him, smiling sadly.

"No. I'm worried about _you_ " Daryl's frown softened, he began walking again.

"Don't be." He grunted, crouching to a mark in the cracked soil beneath their feet.

It still hadn't rained. They'd come across long empty stretches of stream bed and not a drop of water flowed through them. Dried up frogs and newts and toads littered areas that should have been wetlands.

Evie guessed she should be worried about food and water, but Daryl also hadn't eaten, and Daryl was more dangerous than the rest of them.

Standing right next to him she couldn't feel him. That worried her the most, there'd be no warning, no preemptive feeling.

"I can't feel you" she said quietly to his back, and he turned, still crouching, to face her.

"Ya will. Ya body's just making the best use of its energy. We'll get there, Evie, we have to"

"And if we don't?"

"Stop" she did. She didn't think she could argue with him, even if she wanted to. She leaned against a tree next to him and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly and noisily.

"This could be somethin'" Daryl said, pointing roughly at the ground. She looked, half-heartedly, and saw the prints in the dust.

"Oh" she said, turning to crouch more closely. "Is that a paw? Oh god not wolves" she shook her head and Daryl smirked a little

"Nah, not wolves. Dogs" Evie would have rolled her eyes but it felt like too much effort.

"Same thing" she said, Daryl was shaking his head but didn't reply, they'd wasted enough of their reserves talking, it was time to just move on.

* * *

 A few hours later all they had was a possum and a couple of squirrels. Their food for the day. For 15 adults and a baby, who probably should have been eating mushed fruit an vegetables.

There was no sign of the dogs Daryl thought they were following. He turned to Evie and beckoned her with his head gesturing that they get back to their people, but he was surprised when she shook her head and crouched down on her haunches.

"I need, a minute" she said at length, and Daryl realised she was breathing hard. He knew she was exhausted, but everyone was, she didn't get to stop, they couldn't.

"Don't give in" he said, approaching her and reaching his free hand down to help her up. "Ya can't give in." She shook her head gently at him, and finally he got a faint whiff of her, almost a memory of a scent rather than the scent itself. Everyone was low on vitals, every one of his family's scents had been almost nonexistent.

"I'm not, I just need, a minute, maybe five" she rubbed her head and Daryl took a place next to her on the ground. She rested her head on his shoulder and he felt himself stiffen up at her touch.

He was hungry, famished, and her scent grew as she got close. He swallowed hard and turned his face away.

"Hold me" she whispered after a minute "I need to feel something, I'm going numb" Daryl turned his head back to her, frowning at the top of her head.

"Numb?" He asked her, concerned.

"Inside" she whispered, lowering herself to sitting next to him. He chewed at his lip, not knowing what to do. If he wrapped himself around her could he be sure he wouldn't give in to his core instincts? He hadn't eaten in days, he'd never been in this situation, he hadn't let himself.

"I need to feel something" she said again, and he couldn't stand the pain he heard in her voice.

So he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close and breathing in what he could of her. She buried her face into his neck, breathing softly by his ear, the hair that hung there moving with each exhale. It sent his skin into goosebumps, and he was at odds, to push her away, or pull her closer?

She made the decision for him, turning her face into his neck and kissing him softly.

She needed to feel something, she had said, she was going numb.


	24. Chapter 24

_Chocolate brown eyes_

Before Daryl could stop her, if he even had a mind to, Evie was in his lap. Her legs wrapped around him, her hands in the hair at the back of his head, her lips locked with his.

_Full red lips_

He had pulled her as close as he could, their groins touching, his hands tangled in her red curls, gripping, guiding, pulling her harder into him. But he was coming to his senses, they were hungry, tired, not thinking. Evie rolled her body against his, grinding against him.

He couldn't trust himself, that much was clear, and though he was calm now, he worried he might lose his mind again and tried to pull away. Evie followed him, keeping them connected, until Daryl lost his temper a little and gripped her hair painfully at the nape of her neck and gently pulling her head away.

"Stop" she looked at him breathlessly.

"You're hurting me" she managed. He let her hair go, unwrapping his hands from it at length. They stared at each other and he shook his head.

"I can't" he said to her carefully. She frowned at him, her face confused.

"Ever?" She wondered at him in a quiet and breathless whisper, and he shrugged at her lopsidedly.

"I don't trust myself with you, Evie." She looked down at the space between them, appearing to be contemplating their bodies. Daryl put his palms on her waist above her hips, and she put her hands over his.

"I think..." She looked up, her bottom lip caught between her teeth. Daryl narrowed his eyes at her, her cheeks were turning a light flush and her eyes sparkled. She went to speak again and he hushed her, knowing what was coming.

"Don't" he said, cutting her off as she took her breath to speak. "Please, not now" Evie shut her mouth with an audible snap. She looked at him incredulous for a moment then took his hands more tightly in her own and shoved them off her body, standing from him and turning back towards the group.

She hung her head as he watched, then straightened with a deep breath before moving on. He watched her, feeling like crap and lower than dirt. He wanted to tell her he felt the same, or as close as he ever had, but getting lost in themselves wasn't an option. Not now.

Beth flickered in his mind for the hundredth time just that day, and he got up to follow. His mood suddenly sour and low again. 

The group were being followed by the undead. A herd almost in its hundreds sauntered slowly behind them, and Daryl watched as Evie looked nervously behind her. He went to speak to her quietly, spout what Rick had before about getting them at a better time, but she quickened her pace, walking away from him. He could accept that, for now. He'd cut her off and knocked her back, at least in her eyes. In his he was just trying to do the right thing, they were unsettled, in turmoil, and it was no place... For that.

* * *

 

A week later and Evie and Daryl had barely spoken. He took himself off hunting on his own, though once he went with Carol and came back looking like he had been crying. His mood changed a little after that, and she wondered if he had finally managed to let go of all the pent up hurt he'd been carrying for too long alone.

They'd been really struggling for food and water. It was like all the animals had migrated, and taken the water with them. It was tough just to keep placing one foot in front of the other, but they did it, because the only other choice was inconceivable.

Eventually they found a place they could use to get rid of the herd gathering behind them, a bridge over a rocky river where they could coax the walkers close, then push them in to their deaths, or near as possible. They mostly expended little energy doing it, but Evie saw Sasha slowly losing her mind, and Michonne stepped in to calm her down. There was a fight, Abraham got his arm slashed, and Michonne almost put Sasha on her ass.

Evie watched it half interested. Yes these were her people now, and they'd kept each other going, but she didn't have the energy to feel anything. She was numb again. Daryl had knocked her back and feelings just felt like a waste of resources. No one wanted to hear them or feel them so why bother at all?

She heaved a sigh, sidestepping a grey and decayed walker with ease, who then fell to her silent death on the rocks beneath the bridge. She thought maybe this was what it felt like to be the living undead, numb, hungry, thirsty, but the thoughts were jumbled and she couldn't get them to make sense.

She ran the back of her hand over her dry lips, and looked around her for Daryl. He was no where to be seen. If she was thinking clearly she'd miss him, but she wasn't, and she didn't. As it was she was so dehydrated she wasn't even sweating anymore and she couldn't remember the last time she actually peed. The thought struck her as funny and she had to push it away in case she burst out laughing and couldn't stop, and everyone would think she was mad.

Perhaps she was.

They were settling up again for the night when their luck started to turn a little. A wide part of the road under cover of trees appeared and rick suggested they get some rest. Daryl plonked his ass next to her and she rested her head on his shoulder. Life was too short and morale too low for her to bother with a grudge anymore. She couldn't even remember why she'd been mad at him, she couldn't remember much of anything before the last few hours.

He let her do it, and she realised he didn't stiffen all his muscles at her touch, so that was something.

She heard growling, twigs snapping, and the whole group seemed to jump to high alert. A pack of dogs crept out of the trees in front of them, and before anyone could really register what was happening Sasha had shot them all dead. Evie wondered if they were the dogs whose prints she and Daryl had seen, but that felt like months ago, an it couldn't be. Unless the dogs were hunting them.

They ate greedily, in relative silence. Evie pretended she was eating beef, and it made it easier to stomach. She'd eaten squirrel rabbit and possum but somehow eating dog felt weird, wrong.

In the morning Daryl asked her to go get more firewood with him and to look for water. She replied with a shrug, heaving herself to standing and followed him into the trees where the dogs came from.

It was torture. Feeling so low, and so disheartened all the time, not being able to relieve yourself of that feeling because it was all around you. A black cloud, a threatening storm.

She looked. at the sky, squinting in the bright sunshine. If only.

She realised Daryl had been talking to her, and guiltily stopped him.

"Sorry" she said with a shrug, I missed all of what you said" he narrowed his eyes at her and started again.

* * *

 

"It's been like this before, long while ago, now. Maybe as bad, maybe not, but then we found the prison, and things were good again" Evie nodded at him and he wondered if she really had heard this time.

It was sickening, watching his whole family so low, and it didn't help that he was feeling shitty anyway.

"Hey" he said, catching her forlorn face in his hand "we'll get to Washington" she pulled her chin from his touch and looked at him. She looked tired and depleted. He dropped his hand to his to side and chewed on his tongue a little. They needed something, anything, to distract from his. She didn't say anything, just looked at him, into him, with big green glassy eyes. He wished he could read her mind. Had she forgiven him? Did she believe him? She shook her head sadly and turned away from him. Daryl wanted to reach out and touch her, but he daren't. That head shake said it all. She was giving up. Everyone was. He was failing again. Some superhuman he turned out to be.

He thought he'd gotten over losing Beth, Tyreese, the hell that Terminus turned out to be, pushing a cigarette stub hard into his hand, crying tears of the damned, only for that damned burn to heal before he even got back. No physical mark or scarring remained except the ones in his head, and that was just tough shit, because with his memory he weren't likely to forget.

They moved on in silence, collecting fallen branches as they went, until Evie spied the barn in the distance and dropped all the logs she had gathered to the floor. Daryl looked up as she ran forward, before dropping his own handful and giving chase.

"Evie" he called after her, and she stopped suddenly in front of the doors. "Don't run off like that" she turned to him then, and he saw the light in her eyes that had been missing the last two weeks. The glow from inside her lit with her excitement.

"It's just a barn" he said, but she was banging on the door before he had even finished.

"It's something" she said, turning to him again, and he couldn't deny her sweet face, almost glowing again. It was shelter, maybe. Nothing came, no growl or murmur from inside. "We should get the others" Daryl managed a nod. Evie narrowed her eyes at him "What is wrong with you?" She asked him, reading him like a book, knowing he couldn't believe this could possibly be the sanctuary she had made it in her head.

"It's just a barn" he said sullenly, unable to be as excited as she was, not really knowing why, but following anyway as she moved on, re gathering her firewood, light on her feet again as if a real weight had been lifted. He couldn't shake the feeling this wouldn't fly.

He looked at the sky, clouds were moving fast high above them, and he thought it actually might rain.   
But he wouldn't get his hopes up, the last time he felt hope he'd messed it all up.

Beth. Evie.

He moved to follow Evie again, who was waiting impatiently for him to catch up.

* * *

 

Evie was practically skipping back to the others. Daryl could be as sullen and miserable as he wanted, but she was sure, almost certain, that things were getting better.

They'd had a decent meal the night before. Firewood was just laying there for the picking, and now the barn. On top of everything else she was sure she felt rain coming.

She looked up, still squinting in the sunshine and noticed fast moving grey clouds above her.

Daryl was just dramatic, and moody and lost in his own damn head, and as far as she could care he could stay lost in his own head.

She stopped walking, looked back with her arms full of branches again and watched him looking at the clouds gathering above them.   
His face was stern and serious.

Maybe she was glad they hadn't slept together, maybe she was glad he couldn't bring himself to do it. He had demons, and she wasn't sure she wanted to coax them out anymore.

Eventually he caught up to her, and they marched together back to their family, finding them gathered in a tough circle around something.

Rick stormed up to them handing a piece of paper to Daryl.

"From a friend"

"What kind of friend leaves water but doesn't show their face?" She asked no one in particular. She watched as Eugene reached for a bottle, whisking the lid off, and Tara knocking it from his hand.

"We can't" Evie said to herself, looking at Daryl, and he nodded his agreement, moving forward no doubt to investigate further.

She watched him carefully, he put the note in his mouth as he used both hands to grab one of the gallon jugs. She wondered if he could taste anything on it, as well as he could smell. He screwed up the note and held the jug close to his face. He was, he was sniffing the 'friend' out. Evie tried hard not to smile, but as the thunder rolled above their heads, and rain began to fall, everyone was smiling, so she let herself do the same, turning her face up to the refreshing water.

She took a deep breath through her nose, scenting that familiar smell of rain on a hot summer day, is that what she smelled like to Daryl? She sniffed again, her red curls hanging straight with the weight of the rain, and caught Daryl's eye. He gave her a grin, a real true flash of teeth grin, and she felt her smile spread a little wider.

But as the rain got heavier, Daryl's face changed, he grabbed Rick and yelled over the thundering noise that there was a barn, and together they ran, as one, to sanctuary.

 


	25. Chapter 25

Daryl ensured everyone was in the barn before he entered himself and shut the doors. It was dark inside, but dry and warm. A couple of the group were trying to start a fire, and Daryl shook his head at them.

"Won't work, too wet" he said, gesturing at the logs they'd brought in with them.

Maggie and Carol had found a walker in a cupboard, but other than that it was clear, and for now it was safe.

He looked around him for Evie, finding her with her eye at the crack between the double doors, watching for danger, maybe just watching the rain. She was the type who would, he thought, spend hours just looking at the stars or watching rain chase patterns on windows. Maybe one day she would have time to do that again. He wanted to be with her when she did.

"Hey" he said, and she visibly jumped. There was a murmur behind them as Glenn finally got a fire lit using things from the cupboard walker's hideout. Evie was soaked to the bone, her red hair a darker shade hanging wet on her back and dripping on the floor. Rivers of water still ran down her face, carving clean patches in the grime. Daryl thought she looked beautiful, her clothes clinging to her like a second skin, her eyes wide and green and still glowing. Her scent magnified by every droplet.

"This was a good find" he said, and she smiled a little, took a look through the crack again and back at him.

"It's getting heavier." She said, worried, "that's no passing shower."

"Good" he replied. "Maybe the streams'll fill back up" he gestured to the fire in the back of the barn "Go'n get dry, I'll keep watch" she managed a small smile again, but he sensed something was wrong. He questioned her with a simple look, but she shook her head at him and moved away.

He put his eye to the crack between the doors just as a walker ambled past without giving him a single look. He watched it stroll lumpily by, holding his breath and hoping it wouldn't see him.

When Rick started talking crazy, calling themselves the walking dead, Daryl's first thought was, yes. He _was_ the walking dead, so to speak. Didn't everyone think of the vampire legends that way? Undead loveless assholes who just wanted to drink your blood.

But that wasn't him, and he said so. He wasn't going to be compared to the monsters that were out for flesh and nothing else. They weren't diseased, they weren't heartless and out just to feed. He wasn't. He looked at Evie who was eyeing him very carefully, what was she thinking? Maybe after he had attacked her....  
But that was weeks ago, and she'd been OK with him since, and didn't he prove how strong he could be when he rejected her advances?

How he could be so strong when he felt so weak he didn't know. It didn't matter how. He was. And those creatures roaming the earth weren't strong, they were weak, there was no compassion and no thought in them. They'd never think to stop themselves from eating loved ones and children and beautiful women with chocolate eyes and red lips and hair like spun silk in the sun.

He was getting angry, and he needed to calm down. He was mad at Rick for saying those things, and as everyone watched, as all eyes were on him, he walked away back to the double doors of the barn and looked out through the crack between them.

There were more walkers, and a huge pond of a puddle had formed outside, and worst of all the wind was trying to bend the trees.

_I'm not like you_ , he thought at the walkers roaming around, being spun on their feet by the wind.   
_I'm not like you_.

* * *

 

Evie watched as Daryl cursed that they were not walkers.

"Don't compare us to them, we ain't like them" he said quietly, but with a darkness and a vehemence she could happily relate to. No he wasn't. She had wondered, when they were walking in the relentless sun, harbouring insatiable hunger and thirst, if they might be. The thought had crossed her mind. And wasn't everyone the walking dead, really? Weren't they all born with a single definite outcome, that they would eventually die?  
Well, most of them.

She cast her eyes over Daryl's back again, his dirty angel wings, as he watched at the door.  
Rain was starting to come under, she noticed, a flash flood.

_We were all born to die_ , she thought again, _except him_.

Something was waved under her nose, bottled water, and she took it looking up at the person who gave it to her. Rick. Rain Water had beaded in his beard and not yet dried out. It was like dew on a spring day. She couldn't smell him any more, any of them, but she knew if she could that he would be oaky, a wise and aged scent.

She nodded at him with a small smile and he nodded back, though his eyes were wide and staring, as though he'd seen the future and didn't like it one bit. But what was seen could not be unseen and he had no choice but to drive them forward into it.

She drank, and shook the crazy thoughts away. The lack of normal civilisation was doing weird things to her mind.

Despite how much of a 'good find' the barn was, everyone was still despondent, even Daryl, and it was clear to Evie that no one believed in their dream of somewhere safe, a forever home, settling down and creating a life together. In the short time she'd known them three of their people had died, how much more had they seen and experienced before she showed up? How had she been so lucky to lose just her sister in all this mess?   
More people meant more to lose, but also more to fight for. More to live for.

That's why Rick's eyes had had that distant glassiness, he had so much to fight for, but the fight was draining from him. Yet he continued to do so.

Sleep was calling her with its soft lullaby voice and massaging gentle fingers across her tired muscles. She held out as long as she could, watching Daryl by the doors until eventually the blackness enveloped her and sleep won.

When she next awoke the room was pitch, but the storm was raging, thunder rolled and lightning flashed, lighting the barn in fits and starts like a strobe. It took a moment for her to see Daryl straining against the doors, trying to hold them shut as she noticed in the flashes the rotten fingers and reaching limbs through the crack in the large doors.

Daryl was holding them off as best he could but even his super human strength wasn't enough, and she jumped up at the same time that Maggie and Sasha did, and they darted forward to push against the dead with him.

They were so strong, considering they were dead, and Evie felt her boots slipping on the wet floor. But others woke up and came to help, and soon everyone was working together to hold the doors shut and the walkers out.

It felt like they were there for hours, slipping in the water, muscles aching with the stress of pushing back, splinters and nails pierced through their clothes and pushed against their skin, but all that mattered was staying safe, keeping the dead outside.

Eventually it was over, and wordlessly they peeled away and settled to sleep, until just Daryl and Evie were standing at the entrance.

She still leaned against the doors, breathing heavily, and rolled her head to look at Daryl. He was spying through the cracks again, his face firm and serious.she wanted to speak, to reach out to him, but there were no words, nothing she could say to properly convey what she was feeling.   
Without a word she went to lay down, pushing her heavy limbs from the doors, leaving him to watch alone.

* * *

 

In the morning, before the sun rose, Daryl went and lay beside Evie on the floor. He curled himself around her carefully, hoping she'd stay asleep.

But something he had done, some unknown touch or noise, had woken her, and she turned to him.

"Hi" she whispered sleepily, and he managed a small smile

"I din't mean to wake ya" he said, suddenly aware his arm was resting on her hip. He went to remove it, but her own hand shot out and held him still. He swallowed, unsure if he wanted to be leading her on by touching her intimately, but she rested her hand a little softer, relaxing, and closed her eyes again.

He almost wanted to hold his breath so as not to disturb her again, but her breathing soon became heavy and even once more as she slipped straight back into sleep.

He watched her a while. She was still, and so peaceful, and her hand never left his on her hip which jutted out more than perhaps it should.

He watched for about an hour, when she began to stir of her own accord as she woke up. He'd never noticed before, he'd tried so hard not to, but she slept with a small hint of a smile on her face. He wondered if it meant she was happiest asleep, the cruel cold and ugly world hidden from view.

That brought Beth to the forefront his mind again and he sighed frustrated. It seemed to him he couldn't just be with Evie, and think about Evie, without dead women ruining his train of thought.

That was unfair. It wasn't their fault.

He sighed sharply and Evie's eyes opened. She smiled, properly.

"I thought I dreamed you" she said, then her eyes widened and she covered her face with her hands "oh my god did I just say that out loud?" She peeked through her fingers at him, and he wondered if she was pinking under there. He hoped she was. She probably was. Her scent became a little stronger indicating her blood pumping hard right up under skin.

He tried not to smile, but failed miserably, and she turned on to her back so he couldn't see her face.

"I wanna take a look outside" he said quietly so not to disturb anyone else, hoping she'd offer to go with him. He didn't want to admit it to himself, but he wanted to watch the sunrise with her. Watch the oranges and golds in the sky shining off her hair, see if the colours truly match as they did in his mind.

He'd fought hard not to see her in that light, the warm glow of sunrise was bound to make her appear even more ethereal than the night or the day. He had been scared of what seeing that would do to him, but had decided he couldn't go through his life, what was left of it, what was left of hers, without seeing it. Without facing that fear.

He wasn't scared of much, or so it seemed, except himself.

* * *

 

Evie got up, stretched and adjusted herself, her crumpled shirt and screwed up jeans. She was dirty, still damp, and aching from lying on floors and grass for weeks, but waking up to Daryl's face in front of her had made it all just a little better.

She turned from him as she felt herself redden again, the thought of the stupid things her mouth had said before her brain caught up and clamped down on the words before they escaped.

She felt foolish, but he seemed unfazed, so she agreed to go out with him into the morning. It would be cold, she guessed, after the rains, and her jacket was dry and warm as she pulled it around her shoulders.

They left before anyone else was awake, and it felt illicit and naughty. A shiver chased up her spine and down again, excitement building in her gut, though she wasn't sure why. Daryl had made it clear that, at least for now, they couldn't get carried away with each other. There was just too much at stake. With time she understood, but after everything they'd been through together the rejection stung, hurting her pride as well as her heart. She'd thrown herself at him, thinking she'd read him so well, and that was just embarrassing.

But then he appeared before her just before dawn, and even put his hands in her. Talk about your mixed messages.

Carefully skirting a large puddle she looked up and around her, her face dropping suddenly as she took in the all new landscape.

Trees had come crashing down all around the barn, walkers were trapped beneath their branches and trunks, still reaching, still hoping for a meal.

"Oh" she said, stunned into speechlessness. She turned to Daryl who looked grim and serious, "it literally just missed us" she said, shocked. Daryl nodded, looking up and down the line of destroyed trees quietly. "Is this what you wanted to see?" She asked him, still looking at the walkers hit by the flying tree limbs. As she looked up, Daryl was smiling a half smile.

"No" he said, and gestured with his head towards an opening in the trees. "C'mon, I want you to see this"

* * *

 

"It's beautiful" Evie gasped looking out at the sun just creeping above the horizon. Daryl nodded, marvelling at how the warm orange and yellow hues bathed Evie in colour and light.

Her hair shone like nothing he'd ever seen, each and every curl now golden in the sun. She noticed him looking, and he turned to the sunrise before them.

"It really is" he said, trying not to smile. Her pale porcelain skin had appeared tanned and glowing, her green eyes bright and full of life and wonder.

He chanced another look at her, she's closed her eyes, and was smiling up at the sun as it warmed her face.

It was all he had hoped it would be.

When they headed back, far too soon but all too necessary, they passed Sasha and Maggie. They exchanged no words, barely exchanged looks, but Daryl Knew they were heading for the sunrise just as he had, but for altogether different reasons.

He could smell the disappointment and sorrow in them both, with Maggie's scent of magnolia coming in waves he knew she had a hidden agenda. It was written in the strength of that delicate fragrance.

Sasha normally smelled like orange oil, but in her despondency it was flat and weak.

Daryl hoped she'd come back smelling stronger, like she had when she was at the prison and she still had some fight left inside. 


	26. Chapter 26

They were sitting quietly, Evie and Daryl together in one corner, the others spread around the musty barn, contemplating a meal of left over dog, and dribbles of questionable water collected in the rain storm.

Evie felt Daryl shift uncomfortably beside her, and he looked up just before the door flew inward.  
Maggie and Sasha walked in flanking someone no one had laid eyes on before.

"Hey everyone, this is Aaron" Evie narrowed her eyes, noticing instantly that he was clean, shaved, his clothes were not torn or creased.

Daryl was up in an instant, also flanking the newcomer keeping an eye on him steadily.

Evie looked around her, realising that everyone was eyeing this Aaron suspiciously. It made her uncomfortable, and she wondered what would happen next. Aaron started babbling about a community, his home, he tried to show pictures, wanted to convince them to go with him.

She wasn't sure why, but Rick punched Aaron directly in the jaw and knocked him out. She gasped audibly as Rick started barking orders.

"Secure him, dump his pack" Daryl was straight on security, binding Aaron's legs together and his hands behind his back. Evie watched in stunned silence. "They can creep up on us," Rick was saying, "I want eyes in every direction." The look in his eyes from the night before was there again, and Evie knew he was being cautious, though he could have been more subtle about it.  
She didn't have time to ponder, though, Daryl was next to her, gesturing she get up and go outside with him. He looked grim, thoughtful, and like this was going to be no fun at all.

"What the hell" she asked Daryl quietly as they scoped the area outside. "Why did Rick do that?" Daryl jutted his chin towards a small outcropping of bushes

"There" he said just as quietly "c'mon" Evie looked at him, refusing to move. He hadn't even acknowledged her query. He turned back to her slightly, not looking at her directly. "He did what he did. He has his reasons" Evie held her arms out to her sides, palms up.

"And we just go along with that?" She said louder than she meant to. She was still stunned. "He punched a reasonable and disarmed man in the face, Daryl" she shook her head and approached him "you think that's right?" He looked at her then, all narrow and dark and serious.

"I never said that. He has his reasons, is what I said." Evie studied Daryl's face. She couldn't figure it out. Obviously he owed a lot to Rick, his life, she guessed, she couldn't tell if he was just blindly following Rick's orders or if he had his own reasons not to question Rick's actions. She felt herself frown.

"I trust you" she said quietly, though still frowning, "please don't give me any reason not to"

* * *

 

Daryl turned away from her after she mentioned trust. She was stupid to trust him, but he wouldn't tell her that. Not out loud in so many words.

He walked toward the out crop of brush and heard her following. She was still in a state of disbelief, but he couldn't explain to her how or why he agreed with Rick. He was a good leader, he'd kept them alive, and he may have been a little worse for wear right then, but he'd never let them down. But he didn't have the words to vocalise the thoughts, so he stayed quiet.

He knew there was nothing out here. There were no new smells, no new noises other than the groans of the dead half crushed but still focussing on food as they walked by.

The new guy, Aaron, smelled like fresh cut grass, and Daryl knew instantly he posed no real threat. However he seemed naive enough to be a different sort of dangerous, and it was enough to get Daryl out here looking for possible hostiles.

He put a finger to his lips, turning to Evie slightly, as they reached the bushes. She took her knife in her hand and he pulled back the branches.

But there was nothing. He already knew there was nothing, but he had to act like there could be lest his family catch him seemingly slacking.

"What do you think?" Evie asked him as she straightened back up from her offensive crouch. "You must have an opinion" he straightened too and looked at her. Her hair was lifted slightly by the breeze and she shoved it out of her way, wafting over him a wave of that scent he seemed to crave now. Her green eyes were narrow and questioning. It wasn't the first time she'd been unsure of Rick's intentions, and he was sure it wouldn't be the last. She'd also questioned his apparent inability to think for himself before.

"Aaron? I think he's probably harmless." She raised an eyebrow at him, his first instinct was that it was one hell of a sexy gesture, but she was deadly serious.

"Probably?" She countered, and he cleared his throat a little before answering, putting his imagination off for the time being.

"Yeah. He's... Naive. Ain't been through what we have. We would never approach someone, a group, so openly." He shrugged his shoulders "like when I saw you in the woods. Those questions were a set protocol. We let people in with us based on the answers given." She smiled at him a little, dipped her head until her red curls almost covered her face.

"I passed the test?" She asked him coyly, and his imagination rushed to show him all the things he'd do for the coquettish little minx that kept breaking through to him.

He was reminded of her sitting on his lap, of how she tasted when they kissed. It wasn't that he didn't want those things, it was that he couldn't have those things without consequences. He rolled his shoulders and looked away from her, unsure how to answer without falling apart.

"Just barely" he said, with a half smile of his own spreading involuntarily on his features.

* * *

 

Evie tried not to think too much. It was the only way she could follow through with Rick's ideas without having a complete break down and yelling her refusal to treat a man the way Aaron was being treated.

She hadn't been with the group long, but she noticed that Michonne and some others could work around Rick's instinct to attack and defend. They spoke quietly, calmly and directly, making their thoughts clear and working him back to logical thought. She admired that. She was just on the verge of losing her shit, all the time.

She looked at Aaron, tied against a wooden pillar and still trying to be convincing.

Though Rick eventually agreed to go, after all he had people, and children, to keep safe, she didn't believe he believed this man, nor was she comfortable with that far away look in his eyes. He had an agenda, that much was very clear to her.

She looked around at the others, each with their own thoughts running through their minds. Maggie obviously just wanting safety, Michonne needing the group off the road, Carol openly suspicious and on Rick's side the whole time. Noah, even newer than her, appeared excited, after his own home had fallen she could understand that.

Gabriel had been quiet. She guessed as a religious man this was far from what he expected his life to turn into. He was a coward and a threat to them all simply in his refusal to kill walkers. Of all people he needed to believe Aaron, but Evie wasn't sure he did.

She scrubbed her face with dirty hands and looked at Daryl beside her, also looking around the room, making plans in his head no doubt. The idea was to leave after dark, separated from Michonne, Glenn, Aaron and Rick, and she knew Daryl would be leading their group for the hopefully short time they were split up.

He caught her eye, and looked away without acknowledging her, Too caught up in his role as protector.

She wondered what her role was here. She'd saved no lives, caused nothing but anguish for Daryl. What did she add? Another mouth to feed, life to protect. She needed to step up, or step out.   
Maybe this Alexandria would provide an opportunity.

* * *

 

The moon had decorated the world in blues and blacks, elongating the shadows and hiding threats. Daryl and Evie were passing a cigarette back and forth between them, watching as their family bundled into vehicles for this trip into the unknown.

"We'll follow the RV" Rick was saying, and Daryl nodded as Evie passed the cigarette stub back to him. He looked at it before throwing it on the ground and stubbing it out. He took another look around him. Alexandria could be what they all needed. If everyone there was as naive as Aaron and Eric then perhaps they could make it theirs. Or perhaps it could be dangerous, Why exactly did Aaron think they needed their particular group, who had perhaps gone to far in the outside world to integrate again?

He chewed his lip and pushed off the side of the barn, approaching the RV behind Evie. She turned back to him and smiled. He could see she was hoping Alexandria could be the answer she'd been looking for.

He only wished he knew the question.

"This is why we told you to take 16" Eric said in a panic "we cleared 16, we told you this is dangerous!" They were being cut off by walkers in every direction, and the car behind them had just vanished amongst the dead.

"Hey, shut up" Daryl yelled, cutting Eric's babbling off. "Where can we go?" Eric looked at him like he was insane. Blue eyes wide, pale skin draining even more. His heart was racing, Daryl could all but feel it. Eric needed to calm down.

"Go? Aaron was in that car, we have to stop!" Daryl took a deep breath to calm himself.

"They'll be alright. There must be somewhere we can go" This Eric's fragrance was minty, and as he flapped his arms along with his jaw, becoming more irate, it went from minty fresh to burning Daryl's nostrils.

"They'll be ok, Glenn, Michonne and Rick know what they're doing" Maggie piped up, and he was so glad for her. He was on the verge of slapping Eric just to calm him down, and that probably would have hindered their entrance to this new community.

"The car was swallowed up" Evie said quietly beside him. She sounded deflated, not even shocked, or sad, or angry. Just, defeated. "It was there, then it just, it just disappeared" he touched her arm softly,

"They know what they're doing. We need to get to safety." Her wide eyes bored into him, but she nodded.

"Ok." She whispered, as if she didn't believe him.

"Hey!" He yelled at Eric again who wasn't paying attention anymore. Daryl clicked his fingers in front of his face "c'mon. Get us somewhere safe and we'll wait it out. We can ensure they get to us" Eric swallowed hard and nodded, finally, heading to the front of the vehicle to give Abraham directions. Daryl finally took a breath and looked around him.

"We'll find them" Evie said determinedly. He nodded

"Yeah. We will"

* * *

 

They pulled up at a building down an alley. Evie was unsure immediately. It was dark, quiet, and far from the road.

They all exited the vehicle, Eric tripping down the RV's steps and twisting his ankle beneath him. She and Maggie lifted him up while the others scoped out the building.

Evie watched, Eric heavy on her shoulder, as Daryl led the rest of her family into that building after a swift tap on the door revealed nothing. She thought of the shack she and Daryl had found, in a time that felt like years ago.

There had been nothing inside, but the walkers were around the back.

She looked at Maggie suddenly, eyes wide and worried.

"They'll be fine" Maggie said, but Evie shook her head.

"Do you have him? I need to check something" she didn't wait for an answer, she'd drawn her weapon and was edging around the side of the building when she heard Maggie calling after her, throwing her voice.

"Evie! What the hell are you doing? Get back here" but that day, a night in that damned crapper, was playing on her mind.

She crept around the side of the building, a narrow alleyway the light of the moon didn't quite reach. She kept her back to the building the rest of them were in, moving slowly, pressed firmly against the brick work so nothing could creep up behind her.

Taking sideways steps she tried not to hold her breath, edging carefully towards the back of the building. She couldn't hear anything from inside, and guessed the walls were too thick.

She wondered momentarily what she was trying to prove. If there were walkers she was one woman with few weapons, and she could get herself killed.

Or she could stop a walker from attacking her friends, and be a hero. She took a deep breath, her breathing not as steady as she wanted it to be, straining her ears to hear anything except her own blood rushing through her veins too fast.

Finally she came to the back of the building and stood a moment behind the corner, listening for moans, or shuffling feet. When nothing came she edged out slowly, only to come face to face with a lurker who hadn't heard her coming.

At least she knew she could be stealthy.

A gasp escaped as its head came up, it's face a gaping and bloody hole with milky white dead eyes looking at her. She pushed her knife up into the cavity where it's nose should have been as it reached for her, grabbing her jacket and holding tightly.

Suddenly sweating despite the cold she realised the walker was still alive and she pushed a little harder on the knife handle, her whole hand now inside the walkers face.

Finally she felt the tell tale squelch of the thing's brain and it began to fall down, it's knees buckling and taking her out with it.

They collapsed on the floor, the walker on top of her, her hand still gripping the knife wedged firmly in the creatures skull.

She grunted, it's hands still gripped tightly to her coat, as she tried to pull out the knife.

She heard something behind her, and she stopped moving, fear gripping her heart in ice cold hands. Again she wondered what the hell she was trying to prove.

"Red?" Tara's voice, she turned her head, and saw Tara and Rosita standing at an open door.

Rosita moved forward and pulled the walker from her, and grimaced at the blood covering Evie.

"To catch a walker, You don't have to 'become' the walker" Tara said, smiling and holding her hand down to help Evie up. "I got ya red"  Evie nodded.

"Thank you" she was still relying on others to keep her safe and it annoyed the hell out of her.

"What's this?" Daryl appeared on the door way, and Evie remembered her knife in the walker's head.

"My knife" she said stupidly, and went back to the dead head to get it. Tara and Rosita headed back inside.

"Tryin'a get yaself killed?" Daryl asked, still at the door. Evie felt so stupid and helpless. She wanted to keep everyone safe, but had fallen foul of her own bad judgement. How the hell had she survived on her own so long?

"Not on purpose" she huffed, putting her foot on the walkers shoulder so she could pull her knife a little harder.

Daryl was suddenly beside her. He reached inside the walker's face and pulled her knife out with ease.

"Here" he said quietly, and she took it from him without a word, just an annoyed sigh. "Y'alright?" He asked her, and she shrugged and nodded all at once. No. She wasn't, but he could do without knowing that just for now. She was covered in blood and gore, she was tired and embarrassed that yet again she had to be rescued.


	27. Chapter 27

Once Rick, Michonne, Glenn and Aaron had arrived safely, after Rick argued over what was what and what they were going to do, Daryl and Evie took watch at the front door.

He could see Evie was shattered. Still covered down her right side with walker internals she was barely still on her feet.

"Ya don't have to be out here. 'M fine. Get some rest" she shook her head but didn't reply. He realised she hadn't spoken since he'd walked out the building, having felt her anguish, to find her being helped off the ground by Tara. He chewed his lip a little, contemplating why she was being so quiet. He couldn't feel anything coming from her now. He looked at her a little confused. He could always feel every emotion running through her, had assumed he would until her death.

She wasn't dead.

She was concentrating very hard though, sternly looking out at the bushes where they'd parked the RV, her butt against the wall beside the door, legs bent and leaning slightly forward, as if she was ready for anything. She was trying to keep him out of her head, her blood.

"'S'a waste of energy, y'know" he said quietly. "I'll know before ya of anythin''s comin'" She snorted, and rolled her eyes. Daryl chewed his lip to keep from yelling at her. She was being stubborn and ridiculous. "Ya need ya rest" he said through gritted teeth, and at last she turned to him.

"You need to stop" she whispered harshly, turning away when she was done, getting back into her fighting position. He narrowed his eyes, pushing from the wall so he could stand in front of her, see her properly and maybe get her to listen, even if she didn't want to talk to him.

"Wanna tell me what's goin' on?" He tried, bending his knees a little so he could look her in the eye. She avoided his gaze, though, looking over his shoulder at the RV. "Evie" he said, and she turned her eyes to him.

"No" she said, looking away once more and sending his nostrils flaring.

He'd had enough of this.

"If ya gonna be out here, puttin' yaself at risk, I think ya owe me at least more'n five words. Afta everythin', I deserve that much."   
She looked at him again, letting her guard down he was hit with sudden anger and sadness at once

"I owe you?" She asked him, louder than necessary "you've been looking out for me of your own accord and now I owe you?" She stared at him, and Daryl struggled with the emotions flip flopping within him, and her scent throbbing over the air between them as her heart pumped angrily.

"Ya don't really give me much choice" Daryl strained to keep his eyes on hers, though now it was hard for him to hold the eye contact as she stared him down. "Ya run off n keep gettin' in trouble. What'm I gonna do, leave ya to die out here?" He watched her shoulders sag a little as she threw her head back. He thought perhaps she was going to give in and back down.

* * *

 

Evie ran her tongue along her teeth in her closed mouth, finishing in a disbelieving smile, shaking her head still facing the night sky.

"That's what you think? I'd die without you?" Daryl looked like he might argue, but the words had come out of his mouth, there was no point back pedalling now.   
"I'm a burden" she spat. "And I hate that. I'm trying to give myself some sort of purpose here." Daryl narrowed his eyes at her, and she let him speak. It would be interesting to hear him fluster for once.

"Ya've got purpose" was all he said, and she rolled her eyes at him. It wasn't enough. She didn't know what she wanted from him anymore but a throwaway answer clearly wasn't it.

" _You_ protect and feed everyone. _Maggie_ fixed up Eric for the journey to Alexandria. _Noah_ led you to me, Carol and Beth, _Rick_ is a leader, _Tara_ saved Glenn's life. What have I done? Nearly got killed a handful of times." Evie blinked back the tears that threatened. She wasn't sad, she was frustrated, she didn't want Daryl to think she was weak as she argued that she didn't want to be seen that way.  "You can't wrap me in cotton wool" she shoved her hands into her hair, pushing it back and out of her way. "So stop trying" she dropped her hands from her hair with a puff of air from her mouth, and dragged her eyes from his again, watching instead the bushes around the RV.

She noticed Daryl move next to her again, and he didn't speak for a long while. Not until the sky began to lighten a little around the edges.

* * *

 

He was thinking of all the people in the group, the things Evie had left out. Sasha was losing her mind, Carol was having some personal crisis, Eugene had lied and proven himself useless.

"Did ya forget that ya saved my life?" He was leaning against the building now, Evie crouched on her haunches low to the floor. She didn't reply, she didn't even look up. He sighed, not looking down at her. She'd saved his life in more ways than one. He couldn't believe she thought she had nothing to give the group. He'd gone over and over it in his head. How she didn't freak out when she found out what he was, how she found him in the woods when he needed someone the most, how she had helped him mourn and move on from Beth. She'd taught him about himself, and she had showed him so much compassion.

"It goes both ways." He said softly, pushing from the wall. "Ya think I save ya ass 'cause I think ya weak?" He crouched in front of her and shook his head gently. "Y're a part of me. Y're in my head n in my very bones. Ya pump through my veins." Finally she looked at him, and his heart fluttered the slightest bit. Her big green eyes had softened, they were glossy and shiny, and the sun, just creeping up beyond the bushes in front of them, paled in their light. "Evie" his voice came out rough, almost breaking, he swallowed hard, tempted to grab her hands in his, but he resisted. "I can't feel you inside like I do n do nothin'." She looked at him a long moment and he hoped she understood. He was awful with words. Always had been, and probably wouldn't get any better. He hoped she knew him well enough to know what he was trying to convey.

She reached forward and took his hands in hers, her hands were freezing cold. He looked at them and she squeezed gently.

"Look at me" she whispered. At length he raised his head, scared how she may continue, thinking perhaps he hadn't said enough, done enough, to prove anything to her. As their eyes met again she was smiling, and it relaxed him a little.

"Thank you" she said softly, dropping one of his hands to steady herself on his shoulder as she leant forward and kissed him on the temple.

He was grateful she hadn't tried anything else, he wasn't sure how much longer he could resist her advances, and her magnetic like pull on him, but at the same time he missed her lips, and craved the taste of her on him.

She stood, using his shoulder to push up.

"We should go get them up. Best get moving as soon as we can."

* * *

As Alexandria loomed in the near distance, Evie began to feel a little nervous. If Daryl was right these people's naïveté could be dangerous, but what if the group were deemed to dangerous to stay? They had to audition, interview, for their right to join a community of survivors, and it seemed wrong. Survivors in her view should stick together. She was allowed to stay on the basis of three simple questions. She'd never thought what would have happened if her answers were wrong.

What if their leader had that instinctual fear Daryl had spoken about and wouldn't allow him in? Her heart knew the answer to that. If Daryl was outcast they all would be, or Rick would go crazy and take over. His state of mind seemed to prove he was likely to.   
Maybe that wasn't so bad. Maybe the woman would just steer clear of him.

Maybe there was real democracy here.

But at the gates Rick's face changed, and from inside she could hear people talking, children laughing and even a dog barking. It sounded like the apocalypse hadn't reached Alexandria yet, to Evie's mind that wasn't a good thing, because it meant it was most likely on its way.

As the gate rolled back noisily she grasped Daryl's hand. He carried a possum in the other, 'lunch' he had said, which made her want to laugh, but she was scared if she started she wouldn't stop, that's how crazy this felt.

After handing over their guns and being shown to two houses to share, Rick was asked to start the 'audition' process. Evie and Daryl stood on the porch watching him go, again handing a cigarette back and forth between them. She hadn't dropped Daryl's hand the whole time, and he hadn't made any suggestion, verbally or in his body language, that she should. That was unusual, there was always an excuse for him to be away from her when she got too touchy feely.

"What do you think she'll ask?" She said, taking back the cigarette as he passed it to her. He shrugged a little, not commiting an answer. Evie chewed her lip and watched the street.

"This is so weird" she remarked, looking at the houses opposite. Everything was so clean and pretty, the smell that had overtaken the rest of the south hadn't made it this far, there was no decaying flesh scent, no distant burning. No metallic taste to the air, because it wasn't tainted with the blood of the millions of dead.

The grass lawns were short and trim, and the rose bushes in the gardens hadn't overgrown.

"It's weird" Daryl agreed, dropping her hand and leaning forward on the porch railing.

"What do you make of it?" She queried, meaning his supernatural senses. He must have some clue what this was, she thought, looking over the dirty wings on his back. He'd been unusually quiet, even for Daryl. His ethereal glow had faded in the days leading them here, and now he seemed dull, worn out, and depleted.

"The people here are scared of me" he said turning to her as someone past by. Evie watched and the woman raised a hand in hello, Evie smiled, but noticed as Daryl turned the woman's steps became hurried and she turned her face away.

"They ain't lookin me in the eye" Evie approached Daryl and put her hand on his back gently, wondering if he'd even feel it through his layers. She wondered if that bothered him. Surely people had had knee jerk reactions to him all his life, and definitely since he changed. He said so himself.

Maybe he thought the world had changed more than it really had, especially here, where the people seemed even more guarded, shielded from the horrors since almost the start.

* * *

 

Daryl wondered if she'd ask how it made him feel, that people were passing him by in fear, whispering behind their hands, making up their minds in an instant.

"Because of what you are?" She asked instead with her voice low. Daryl shook his head a little.

To be truthful he'd never made the best impression. His narrow eyes, his thin and grim mouth, his tendency to sit and listen without expression before flying off the handle seemingly unprovoked and appearing explosive and unpredictable.

In all honesty though, it bothered him now. If people were scared of him it could hinder their getting on in this community. He just needed to know what the plan was so he could handle this shit the best way. He wouldn't know that until he got some time with Rick.

If they could settle here, then maybe...

He cut his own thoughts dead as Rick appeared on the road, heading back to the house after his own interview. He looked to Evie after giving Daryl a nod.

"You next" he said roughly, and he watched her down the porch steps with Rick standing beside him, hands on his hips. "We get cleaned up, maybe have a look around. Ain't nothing pressing coming from Deanna. She's in charge but... She's as naive as everyone else." Daryl rolled his shoulders a little.

"I gotta possum to dress" he said gesturing to it.

"Yeah well," Rick said "we need to make an impression" Rick smiled and Daryl snorted at him, worried he'd already made the wrong one.

* * *

 

"What did you do before, Evie?" Evie looked at the small woman sitting before her with a huge smile on her face and shrugged.

"I don't, it doesn't matter" Deanna's face took on mock shock.

"Oh, yes it does. I believe you are still the person you were before" Evie snorted at that. She was nothing like the Evie she was before her home town fell foul to the undead. She blew a stray hair off her face and shrugged again.

"I could tell you anything, what's to say I'd be honest. Maybe I've looked around, seen what you're lacking, and want to stay so bad I make something up from that"

"I'm very good at reading people." Deanna said, still smiling, acting like they were old friends. "If you lied I'd know" that sent a bolt of ice through Evie's chest, and she had to physically hold her hand over herself to warm it back up. Surely the woman was bluffing, there's no way she'd know if a stranger was lying to her.

Daryl. It was like her heart beat his name, and she wondered if he'd felt her sudden pang of worry.

"My life started when Daryl and I met in the woods. That is what matters to me. My family, those two kids," she shook her head "what I did before that, it's insignificant" Deanna's face was pitying, and Evie hated that.

"Do you really believe that?" Deanna asked. Evie thought about that hard. She was sure alright. She did nothing for anyone, and meant nothing to anyone. She'd rather the whole sorry mess of her life before hadn't even happened. She nodded.

"Entirely. I was nothing until Daryl and I found each other in the woods"


	28. Chapter 28

"We're bein' followed" Daryl said very quietly to Evie beside him. He felt her stiffen, just a little, but he gave her a small shake of his head. Nothing smelled particularly bad here, "I don't think they're dangerous" he followed, lifting his 'bow high above the waist high grasses that they waded in. They'd come out to hunt, Daryl was craving raw meat and taking Evie with him was second nature now. there was no question she would stay behind, not even from herself.

Among those new people he didn't want to be seen eating an animal he had skinned and pulled apart on the porch, it didn't fit with Rick's idea of fitting in, so he'd eat outside if he needed to. He could cope with that. He'd already put one of the little runner kids on his ass yesterday, scaring the bejesus out of Evie when his fangs extended and he had to turn away. He hoped the Alexandrians wouldn't find more fault with him because he liked to be outside. He could eat human food, but it was so bland, it kept him alive, but it did nothing for him. It also didn't stave off the greys his vision fell into when he was truly hungry, and he'd decided the world was dark enough without seeing no colours, too.

He'd told Evie about his meeting with Rick and Carol, what Rick wanted from this place. Evie seemed nonplussed, but she didn't divulge how she really felt about Alexandria. Weird, was all he got from her. Strange and new.

Evie's scent wafted towards him as her pulse sped up. He put a hand on her arm and shook his head again. "They mean us no harm." he said, and her wide eyes didn't falter, but her heart didn't ease up either. He shouldn't have said anything. Now he was craving blood in the presence of the best blood he had ever tasted. He chewed his lip, hard, trying to focus, instead just getting the rotten and black taste of himself in his mouth.

He spied the person who had been following them and swung his bow to his eye. In an instant Evie was on high alert, seeming to pick up on his subtle changes in body language. Had they been together that long?

"Get out here" Daryl called, and Aaron slowly came out from behind a tree with his hands up and a rifle dangling from his shoulder. Daryl wondered if he had the presence of mind to put the safety on before he dropped it. "Ya followin' us?" Daryl asked, and Aaron fumbled his words nervously, his fresh cut grass smell mingling with Evie's summer rain and sending Daryl's senses in to overload.

"N...No, I'm out here hunting for rabbits." Aaron looked Daryl and Evie over "That is incredible. You can tell the difference between a walker and a human just by the sound of their movements?" He shook his head, aghast, and Daryl was almost spitting. He sneered at Aaron who just continued his little rant, irritating Daryl with his simple presence let alone his rambling. "Can you tell the difference between a good guy and a bad guy? Rick, doesn't seem too good at that." Daryl snorted

"ain't no difference no more" he said roughly, then asked again "why're ya followin' us?" He gestured at Evie as he said it. Aaron hadn't paid her any mind at all.

"Sorry, I wasn't aware that I was" Aaron swung up his rifle and Evie swung her hand gun up at arms length. Daryl was attacked with a feeling of fear and anger, and Evie all but vibrated next to him. He didn't realise how on edge she had been.

"Watch what you're doing" she hissed at Aaron, but Daryl put his hand on her arm with a little pressure until she lowered her weapon. She didn't look around though, and her face was steely grim, even though her true feelings were evident all through Daryl.

"Sorry" Aaron dropped the rifle again, raising his hands, palms out, sounding stunned. "You've seen a lot out here, huh?"

"A lotta bad people doin' a lotta bad shit" Daryl sneered. "What d'ya want?" He narrowed his eyes, all the fear he could feel was coming from Evie. Aaron was cautious, wary, but he was not frightened of Daryl. That put Daryl on edge a little.

"Can I join you?" Intrigued Daryl shrugged, much to Evie's dismay

"Keep up, n keep quiet"

 

* * *

 

When Aaron said he knew why Daryl came outside the walls of Alexandria, Evie's breath caught. She eyed Aaron carefully as he explained

"People are scared of you. They were scared of me and Eric, although for different reasons." Aaron chuckled, and Evie felt her eyes narrow. They were walking through shorter grass now, and though it still covered her boots it was easier going. She didn't need to watch where she stepped quite so much.

"Why d'ya think they're scared?" Daryl asked him, quiet and thoughtful. Evie began to wonder what the point of her being out here was. Aaron was here for Daryl, that much was clear. She thought maybe he had followed them, despite his insistence that he was out hunting bunnies. He seemed to have an agenda.

"Because they don't understand you, because they've been holed in some odd version of the old world where people like you were to be feared, given a wide berth" Evie snorted loudly and both Daryl and Aaron turned to her. She shrugged.

"Sorry, but that's ridiculous" But at least it wasn't the other. She didn't think that would have gone down well. With Daryl or herself. Daryl was on edge enough having her know what he was, what he'd done. Aaron nodded.

"Oh I know, it's complete crap. But they're a little closed off. Rick and your group came marching in looking like you'd seen hell."

"We have" Daryl spat suddenly. Aaron backtracked a little, fumbled over his words again getting Evie's back up as he did so.

"Evie isn't scared, and I'm not" Daryl shrugged his shoulders a little.

"Ya should be, both of ya" he said pointedly. Evie strained not to roll her eyes. She knew she should be, he didn't have to keep telling her. She was once, but she'd openly admit it talk almost being killed by him to force that feeling out.

Closed off. That was one way to put it. Small minded, bigoted, disliking Daryl because he was a greasy redneck was akin to racism. Evie rolled her eyes as she thought about that. There was no room for that in her life, then or now. She bristled and rolled her shoulders to calm down. They were naive, maybe her family could teach them that naïveté was dangerous now. That they had to buck up.

That Daryl was to be revered, not feared.

"Let them get to know you" Aaron was saying. "You should go to Deanna's party" Evie scoffed, quieter than before, and though she knew Daryl would have heard her, no one turned this time. The idea of Daryl in such close company was laughable. It shouldn't have been, and she regretted the small smile on her lips as Daryl put a hand behind him slightly and pointed vaguely in her direction. I feel you smilin' that single hand gesture said. I feel it and I don't like it one bit.

"I ain't got nothin' to prove" Daryl said aloud, and Evie was proud of him. Putting on airs and graces for these people would be foolish. They had to learn who the newcomers were and accept them or not, that was all there was to it.  __

* * *

 

"Rick's back there playing cop. I ain't pretendin' no shit for no one" Daryl turned to Evie and held an arm out to her. "C'mon" he said, gruffly, gesturing that she catch up. There was an air of smugness about her he could have done without. Yes, to a point he'd been pretending, but not so much as Evie was making out in her own mind. He narrowed his eyes at her as she caught up to them both, and she raised an eyebrow at him. He shoved her arm gently, and a smile spread on her face.

Yeah, a smugness he could definitely do without.

He was saved by the scent of the dead, and he stopped, hunkering down. A gesture Evie quickly matched. Aaron looked a little confused, and Evie didn't know why they were suddenly very alert, but Daryl's blood in her, their connection, pushed her that way and she let it.

It was just a single walker, ambling lopsidedly through the undergrowth. Daryl straightened and shot it with a bolt.

"Maybe we head back for the night" he looked at Evie, and her open honest face said she'd follow him anywhere. He avoided her eyes, hating how he could read her trust in him. She shouldn't trust him, the Alexandrians were well within their rights not to.

When the big black gelding, shining and beautiful, even in Daryl's vision of greys and whites, ran across their path he heard and felt Evie catch her breath.

"Oh," she said as it caught her off guard. Aaron, still with them, began to speak in hushed tones that Daryl much preferred to his normal speaking voice.

"Buttons" Daryl cocked an eyebrow at him and he explained "he ran past the walls, and one of the kids thought he looked like a buttons. I've been trying to catch him for months." Daryl watched the horse carefully. It was wary of them, and would bolt the second they moved if they weren't careful.

"Lemme" he grunted, taking the rope off Aaron, thinking he might be quick enough to tether the gelding. He pursed his lips and made kissy noises, but the horse showed them the whites of his eyes and Daryl thought maybe this would be a lost cause. The horse could sense exactly how dangerous Daryl could be. Animals always knew. But Aaron wanted to save it and be a hero, it was written all over his face. So full of hope, and now he had faith that Daryl could do this.

"Have you done this before?" Daryl shrugged at Aaron

"My group did. They hadn't been out here this long though" Daryl felt Evie move beside him, and he turned to her as she stood up and moved forward. "Evie!" He hissed, but she waved a hand at him dismissively. He tried to feel what she thought she was doing instead, but nothing came, and anxiety flowing through Aaron was overpowering the airwaves anyway.

Evie moved gently, like the breeze which ruffled the grasses she walked through.

"Hey beautiful. Oh you're a gorgeous boy" Daryl heard her whispering, but she wasn't looking at the horse. Her arms were out at her sides slightly, palms open and showing, and her head was turned away. Intrigued Daryl stood straight, and the horse eyeballed him and whinnied loudly, picking its front feet of the ground in a semi rearing gesture, before turning and pretending to eat again.

"Oh, you used to be somebody's huh? Look at you all shiny." Evie turned to Daryl and hushed him. Aaron was standing next to him completely agog.

"I've never got that close to him before. Is she a cowgirl or something?" Daryl shook his head. He had no idea how she was doing this.

She was less than a foot away when the horse took a fright and reared up on his hind legs and screamed, turning tail and running. She watched him, looking completely depleted. Daryl approached her, and he could feel the disappointment rolling off her in waves.

"Horse's gotta be half wild by now. Don't worry, we'll get him" Evie gave Daryl a noncommittal hum though her nose and turned away from him.

* * *

 

They stood together, Daryl and Evie, outside Deanna's house. She'd showered, and she smelled more like summer and freshness than ever. The smell of failure she had over that horse had been washed away. He couldn't understand why she was so downhearted, Was just a horse. Daryl licked his lips as Evie looked at the lit windows.

Beth would have loved this, his heart missed a beat as she was thrust upon his mind again. He couldn't figure out why that kept happening. Why Beth? Where had Merle gone, and the others, all the many others.

But she would have loved this. A party, electric lighting. Music. Her face would be beaming with radiant hope, perhaps she'd have dressed up, worn her hair down.

He sighed heavily and turned to Evie. She wasn't smiling, she wasn't beaming with all the possibilities this place could have. Her face was closed, drawn.

"I can't get used to it" she said quietly, still watching the black silhouettes at the windows. "It's so loud, and too bright." She turned to him, "I almost didn't recognise Rick tonight. I had to fight to stop myself drawing my knife on him." Daryl contemplated her a moment longer when he caught movement out of the corner of his eye.

"Daryl, Evie. Hey" Evie turned,

"Thought you'd be in there" she said, gesturing to the house, and Aaron laughed and shook his head.

"No, thanks to Eric's ankle I was given a free pass! Thank god" Daryl narrowed his eyes

"Ya wanted us to go"

"I can see you tried, that's half the battle. If you're not going in, do you want to drop in with us for Dinner?" Evie and Daryl looked at each other a moment, then back at Aaron. He smiled at them "come on, this is some serious pasta." Daryl took a deep breath, ready to decline the offer, he still needed meat, and pasta wouldn't cut it right now, but Evie tentatively stepped forward, and on impulse he followed her.


	29. Chapter 29

It had been an interesting night, but now everyone was back from their party, huddled together in their one house. Evie looked out at the dark street from the porch, the only light the orange glow from the cigarettes she and Daryl smoked as they stood side by side, leaning on the railing.

Aaron had invited Daryl to be Eric's replacement on his scouting missions, and Daryl had agreed on one condition.

"Evie comes too" Aaron didn't falter, just nodded and replied

"Of course" As if the suggestion that she wasn't invited was ludicrous. She wondered if Aaron, or anyone, had any idea just how connected she and Daryl were. No one questioned their closeness. No one battered an eye to the fact that they were always together. It was accepted without a word that where there was one, the other would be near by.

Apart from the meetings with Rick and Carol, that was just how it was with them. Even then Daryl had told her everything.

She wished she could explain it. She wondered if it was their blood flowing through each other's veins or something more divine than that, other worldly perhaps, which pulled them together like opposing magnets.

She cast her eyes over Daryl beside her, he didn't look around, just stared out to the street as she had, puffing on his cigarette before flicking it to the front lawn. Evie chewed her lip, working up the courage to ask him the question directly.

"What if I didn't want to go?" Daryl looked at her, finally, but he looked a little wounded.

"Ya don't wanna come?" Evie shook her head, and smiled with one side of her mouth.

"That's not what I said" she replied, trying not to sound too irritated. Daryl had a way of getting around her and not answering any more than vaguely. She needed that to stop. "What if I didn't want to" Daryl shrugged.

"But ya do. So ya will." He spoke very quietly, but his voice was crystal clear in the dark and still of the night. "I don't see the point of what ifs. Is what it is" Evie looked back out to the road, the smile gone from her mouth.

"Whole world is full of what ifs. What if we did catch that horse, what if we went to Deanna's instead of Aaron and Eric's place tonight" she paused and took a deep breath "what if you hadn't come to your senses that day out in the parking lot." Daryl turned back to the street as well and sighed a heavy burdened sigh.

"Ain't never gonna live that down am I?"

"It's not just about the past, either" she said, pointedly ignoring the comment. She didn't want to go down that route. "What if we go left instead of right?" Daryl rolled his eyes,

"Weren't ya the one who believed in fate, destiny? Ain't the path we take always gonna be the right one?" Evie narrowed her eyes, convinced she hadn't said quite that.

"I believe there's a set destination. How we get there is up to us." Daryl snorted gently.

"Actions have consequences. Ya can't worry about what came before, ya worry about what comes next" Evie understood that, but she also knew it was bullshit. It took Daryl weeks to get over Beth, and even now she wasn't convinced he had.

"You think about the past" she replied quietly. "A lot" Slowly Daryl turned to her. His glow was back, and it seemed to halo him in a dim light. Thanks to that she saw him completely perfectly even in the dark.

"I have the capacity to." He said roughly.

* * *

 

He watched as Evie's eyebrows shot up towards her hairline

"Excuse me?" He closed his eyes briefly against her aura which got brighter with her emotions.

"I din't mean that" he opened his eyes again. "I mean I can think about the past without it affectin' anythin' else I do." He stepped a little closer to her so he could whisper, and her scent got stronger as she watched him sidle up. "Because of what I am, I have a photographic memory. I can remember every detail without tryin'. N I never think what if, I think 'shit, this stuff happened' n I might go over n over it, I ain't gonna lie, but I ain't got much choice cause it never fades." He took a breath "not until I turn into whatever it was on that 'lot." He watched as Evie's face dropped a little.

"I didn't mean to bring that up." Her eyes were sad, and sorry. Daryl gave her a small shrug and looked away from her again.

"What ifs sometimes don't bear thinkin' about" He watched as a light came on in the house in front of them. Someone was having trouble sleeping. "Can't waste time thinkin' ya coulda died that day." He felt Evie shuffle her feet beside him, and he looked up just as her arm reached out to him.

"That's not what I think about" her hand lighted softly on his arm, and she looked at it there. "I don't care about me. I just can't bear the idea of leaving you behind." She turned then, her hand leaving his arm warm where her fingers had lingered. "Good night, Daryl" she said, and gently opened the door.

He watched the closed door for a long while, wondering at her initial queries. There was no question she'd be with him, and he wondered at that. Why was he so sure, was that the reasoning behind her babbling about ifs and buts?

He'd never felt so connected with anyone. There was a time he thought maybe, when it was him and Beth and she pulled him from a dark and dangerous place in his mind, but Evie was altogether different. Her pull was stronger, his need to protect and be with her was stronger.

He turned back to the street and contemplated lighting another cigarette, although he should have been pretending to sleep along with everyone else to keep up appearances. The light in the house across the way had gone off, but he could still clearly see a shadow at the window.

He and Evie were intricately connected, and he knew now he wouldn't even be able to feign sleep as he turned that over and over in his mind.

He headed across the porch and entered the house. He could at least try. Trying was half he battle.

* * *

 

Despite going to bed so late Evie was up at the crack of dawn. Light streamed in through the windows into her face, dim pink light that made the room seem warm. Noah was already heading for the door and Abraham was sitting up and rubbing his face. Today they would all be going to work, today they had to really prove themselves.

She couldn't See Daryl in the room, and thought he was probably up and about already.

She was sure he'd come in just behind her last night. People were waking up all around her, on the floor, the couch, and finally she noticed Daryl sitting on the window sill, casually watching out the window. He caught her eye and gave her a small nod, to which she got up and headed for the kitchen behind Maggie and Glenn.

They had a simple breakfast, the power had cut at some point after the party the night before, but Evie noticed that Daryl didn't feign eating much, there was clearly something on his mind. She narrowed her eyes at him, but he avoided her gaze. She chewed her tongue a little before standing up.

"Aaron's gonna be waiting for us, we should go" Glenn said he and Tara should be getting off too, and they all left together.

Evie noticed Noah and Reg heading towards them. She raised her hand, a smile on her mouth which had spread without her knowledge. This still felt weird, but it was kind of nice. She looked at Daryl, still brooding and silent next to her, and asked him outright what was going on.

"You're quiet, even for you." She stopped walking and he turned to her.

"Ya've given me a lot to think about" he said roughly. "N we're goin out there today to find new people, people who we need to be OK lettin in here, people I need to feel ok havin' round ya, them." He gestured to where Glenn, Tara, Noah and Eugene prepared to leave on their mission to get the power working, watched by Maggie, Deanna, and Reg.

Evie looked back at Daryl whose dark blue eyes bore into hers. She looked away quickly to keep from falling deeply into them and becoming a jittering mess.

"I gave you something to think about, huh?" She smiled a little to herself, wondering exactly what he'd been thinking about, but Daryl cut her off in her thoughts.

"Hey, we got work to do, we can think about our personal shit later." But he gave her a lopsided smirk which she stored away in her memory banks. It was becoming a rare commodity, his half smile, she didn't want to forget it.

* * *

 

They were out past the fields of long grass again when the beautiful gelding trotted out in front them. Daryl had smelled him a mile or two back, an unmistakable scent that threw him back to the farm, back to the beginning. Back to Sophia and Lori and Shane and all the others who couldn't be saved. It was as if the horse was following them, like maybe it wanted to be saved.   
It showed Daryl the whites of its eyes again, and he knew he wouldn't get near it. He turned to Evie, who was hunkered low and already looking like she might go forward.

"Wait" he whispered, and the horse whinnied as if it had heard. Aaron, for his part, was quietly watching, which Daryl thought made a nice change from his rambling all day long. Evie looked at Daryl and raised an eyebrow, he hadn't said why wait, but he could tell she understood.

"Walkers?" She asked quietly, and he nodded.

"Only a couple, no more'n five. Just wait." Aaron looked over at them both, concerned but quiet. Daryl gave him a nod that he hoped said 'it's ok, we're good' and Aaron turned away, watching the horse once more.

Suddenly the walkers appeared, surrounding buttons as though they'd wrangled him here on purpose. One approached from the rear and the horse kicked out hard knocking the walker on its ass, at which point buttons turned and fled.

"God dammit" Evie hissed, and the four upright walkers turned to the sound. Daryl gave her an exasperated look, she shrugged, pulling her knife from her belt as she stood to do her bit. Daryl and Aaron followed her wordlessly.

"I'm gonna get you that horse" she said calmly to Aaron as she stabbed a walker in the temple and let it crumble to the floor. "I'm gonna catch him, and ride him all the way home, you'll see." Daryl had to turn his face away from her as the innuendo smacked him like an open palm across the face.

Evie bent and stabbed the last remaining walker, the one Buttons had kicked to the ground and hadn't got back up.

"Oh my god, you guys are incredible" Evie turned to Aaron, her eyebrows knitted together and her face screwed up in confusion. Daryl felt a wariness coming from her and he could understand. Aaron was so Polite and far too casual.

"The way you handle the dead, still having a conversation. You show such little fear." Evie shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly but Daryl spoke for them both.

"We're scared, ya just get to a point when the fear sort of has to wait" act first think later, was what he meant. But putting it that way to Aaron wasn't going to do any of the family any favours. "Ya get used to that the more ya 'round the dead n the livin' alike" he added roughly. Aaron looked awe struck nonetheless, and spoke again.

"But the way you two work around each other. It's like ballet" Daryl snorted quietly, and began to head the direction they'd already been taking.

"Ya say the buildings are just over this hill?" He asked, desperate to change the subject to something other than he and Evie, even if Aaron's words did work in his favour, surely proving to Evie that she did belong with them.

* * *

 

An old folk song was playing itself On a loop in Evie's head as they crested the hill Aaron was sure would lead them to a small group of buildings and possibly people. Over the hills and far away.

_Oh Evie you are so lame_ her sister admonished in her head _You are such a loser_

Evie ignored the voice as well as she could, seeing now a small community of houses and businesses. Aaron was right, and he suddenly went up in her expectations.

She'd never seen anything so beautiful, it was quiet, clean, apparently devoid of walkers. She followed Daryl over the hill, struggling to keep her footing on the steep side of the mound they'd crested.

"Could be a group in one of these" Aaron said, fiddling with the equipment he used to listen in. "I never brought Eric because... Well..." he paused a long time, and Evie could see him struggling to find the right way to say it.

"He's not much of a fighter, huh?" She tried for him, and he looked at her gratefully.

"Right, and I don't know what I'd do if I ended up getting him hurt" Daryl butted in, and Evie felt a wave of irritation come off him.

"But it's different With us?" Aaron fumbled over his answer

"No, of course not, I mean, you're good at this." Daryl grunted quietly and Evie gave him a look she hoped conveyed a simple 'shut up'. He smirked at her, and she chewed her tongue to keep from pulling a fave back at him.

"Y'hear anything?" Daryl asked as the approached the little row of buildings. Aaron was listening intently and eventually e looked up and nodded fast.

"I do, I have something" Evie thought he looked surprised, but daren't speak as strained to hear. "People," he said quietly "voices"   
Daryl gave Evie a nod, and she reached out in her mind to feel him.

What she felt wasn't comforting.  
He was unsure, his eyes narrow as he watched Aaron for any more information.

Evie suddenly had a very bad feeling.


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys,  
> I know the last couple of chapters have been slow, this one kind of is too, but there's excitement to come in the next ep. :)

"They're in one of the buildings"  
Aaron was leading the way, fiddling with his kit and almost tripping over his own feet in his excitement. "They sound hungry, perhaps we can leave them some food or..."

"Nah. No tricks." Daryl huffed. "We listen n if they seem OK we'll meet 'em." Aaron looked aghast but Daryl shook his head firmly. "That water shit ya pulled just riled everyone up, trust me on this." Aaron looked at him a moment, both of them, and nodded, giving in begrudgingly.

"I'm not going to take both of you on" he said with a nervous laugh.

"We'll head into one'a these other buildin's" Daryl pointed roughly down the street "we'll listen in a while." Evie knew her heart was beating too fast, and willed it to slow down as Daryl brushed past her, nostrils flaring and taking a deep breath. She was so convinced that they weren't going to find anyone on their first trip out.

She closed her eyes and took a long slow breath as Daryl banged on the door now before them. She thought maybe Daryl could hear these people himself, perhaps even clearer than Aaron's weird listening device. She'd not know unless she could get him alone to ask, that was unlikely given Aaron hanging around.

Daryl held up a single finger as nothing came back to them from his knock on the door.

"There's one or two in there" he said quietly, talking to Evie, seeming to have forgotten Aaron was there. But he _was_ there, and Evie thought maybe he should get his hands dirty."You can hear them from here?" She asked Aaron, and he nodded.

"Not sure about having the walls between us" he said and Evie shrugged. 

"We'll find out won't we?" She looked at Daryl "ready when you are." She pulled her knife from her belt, leaving her gun, knowing she should Only take a shot if she had no other choice. Daryl looked back at Aaron.

"Ya ready?" Aaron nodded, he'd bagged up his equipment and was holding a machete in his hand. Evie wondered if she'd underestimated him. Daryl tried the door but it appeared to be stuck, so he brought his leg up and kicked it swiftly with the sole of his boot, bringing his foot down on the floor and swinging his bow up to his eye in a single movement. Evie couldn't deny watching him was like watching choreography. She'd never moved so delicately in her damn life.

Daryl moved his bow side to side, sweeping the room, it was nothing but a hallway with closed doors either side. He beckoned her and Aaron in, putting his ear to the nearest door.  He held up a single finger and Evie looked at Aaron

"Just one" she said, "let's check the other doors."

"How do you know how many?" Aaron asked quietly as she put her own ear to the next door.

"Practice" she answered him, then put her finger to her lips. The room was quiet. She tapped gently at it with her foot and something flew at the door from the other side, shaking it within its frame. Aaron darted back and Evie had almost jumped into his arms with fright.

But she put her ear back to the door gently. She listened to the moaning and groaning and the scratching of rotten nails and finger tips against the other side of the door. She looked at Aaron who was waiting to find out exactly what was going on.

"Just one" she whispered, then nodded towards the final door in the hallway. "Check over there." He did as she asked but shook his head at her after listening, there was nothing. Evie took him at his word and went back to Daryl.

"You open the door a crack, n stab that fucker in the head. I'll get the overactive one next door." Evie nodded, placing her hand on the door knob and taking a breath to steady herself.

It was still scary. Daryl was right about that. One wrong move, a slip, a caught piece of fabric or a sticking door could be the death of them.  
But it was also exhilarating, and perhaps that was scariest of all.

* * *

 

The first room was a dining room and after depositing the walker outside, Daryl, Evie and Aaron made use of it as their lookout post.

Aaron set up their equipment and listened in as best they could.

"One of them is sick" he whispered, though there was no way for those people to hear him. "They have a fever, the others are talking about getting medicine." Evie gave Daryl a look and he nodded at her.

"A fever?" He asked Aaron, his heart sinking a little "could they be bit?" But Aaron shook his head.

"Doesn't everyone know there's no cure for this by now? Maybe it's flu. We have a doctor." Evie held her hand up at Aaron.

"Wait a Second" she said quietly. "You're jumping the gun a little." Daryl could feel her nerves, a wariness Aaron didn't seem to share.

He was sure just a few weeks ago she would have rushed into the next building with Aaron and welcomed these people, with open arms and little else to protect themselves.

"We know nothing about these people." She concluded, lowering her hand to the table and rubbing at the shiny wood with her thumb. Aaron conceded, nodding his head and listening a while longer.

"There's at least four people. He said a little later, as the sun began to set and an orange glow set the room on fire around the edges of the pulled blinds. "Four people are talking together, plus the person who is sick. So five people." Daryl and Evie looked at each other across the table, both knowing that it didn't matter if there was one or ten, they'd be ok. But they couldn't put that to Aaron.

Daryl watched as Evie became unusually interested in the grain of the wood the table was made from, so he suggested they get some rest.

"We'll be OK for a couple hours. I'll take watch." He answered Aaron's quizzical expression. "Don't sound like they're goin' nowhere fast." Evie looked up and gave Aaron a nod of her head.

"There was a couch in the empty room. Maybe you go and set up and I'll be along in a bit to keep you company." As Aaron left Daryl turned to Evie quizzically.

"Y'aint tired?" He asked her, and she shrugged at him, but he could see there was more tot his than feeling wide awake.

"Just wanted to spend some time, just us." She said quietly "used to it just being us" she looked at him under her lashes, still rubbing at the shining table top with a restless hand. Daryl watched her a moment, chewing the inside of his lip. That look she gave him, up under her impossibly dark lashes, big shining green eyes. It was incredibly sexy, and he was convinced she didn't even know it, which made it more so. He cleared his throat and crossed his arms over his chest, and finally she looked up from the damn table at him.

"Sorry" she rolled her eyes and straightened in her chair, an air of irritation around her. "I know you don't like me talking that way." She held his eyes for a moment with hers, and he thought he would love to get lost in them for an eternity, or at least, for as long as they remained connected in this world.

"I don't mind it" he said eventually. "But we discussed this already, ya gettin' ya hopes up n I keep dashin' 'em. It's as hard on me as it is on you." He watched as Evie huffed a little bit, her scent shooting along the exhaled air towards him. He sighed his own puff of air and looked away from her.

"I can't help it" she said quietly, speaking again to the table "I'm sure _you_ understand being out of control" she looked up then, and Daryl was sure her eyes were accusatory. They bore into his. he almost felt it as a physical blow. Laser beams penetrating into his core.

"That's unfair" he said, and she laughed at him.

" _That's_ what's unfair?" She shook her head, eyes still tearing into his very soul. He chewed his cheek as she glared at him, he too looked at the table, tempted to punch it and smash it in two. He was incensed.

"Nah" he said, much calmer than he felt, looking up at her still staring at him with that accusatory look in her eyes. "Ya right. What's unfair is feelin' the exact same way as ya, but havin' to keep a damn lid on it. It's knowin' that if I so much as lose concentration 'round ya, for even a second, ya could end up as dead as Lou-Ann."

"I trust you" Evie cut in, but Daryl wasn't so much as stopping for breath.

"ya shouldn't trust me." Evie stood and slammed her palms flat on the table, knocking her chair over with a crash to the floor, stopping Daryl's words short.

"Maybe you should learn to trust yourself" she spat, staring at him for a long moment with glassy eyes before storming around the table to leave the room.

* * *

He was in front of her. She didn't have to look up to know it. Her heart beat fast in her chest and it seemed aware of his closeness. She didn't want to look at him, eyes brimming with angry hot tears, and she knew her face would be flushed. She also knew her blood being at the surface of her skin would be tempting to Daryl, proving him right and her wrong in his eyes. Again. Like he needed any more excuses. 

She kept her head down, carried on walking, hoping she'd get around him, kind of knowing, almost hoping, that she wouldn't.  
His hands were on her shoulders as she went to take another step.

"This ain't easy." He said, as though that made it ok. Evie closed her eyes, still not looking up. How could she look at him, when all he was going to do was hurt her again.

"For me, it's like walking through quicksand." She opened her eyes and shrugged her shoulders. "Like trying to breathe underwater." She sniffed dramatically and looked at him, hoping she was dry eyed. He looked torn, like he didn't know whether to throw her across the room or kiss her. "Sooner or later I will drown, then your heart will decide it wants me, and I'll be gone." She shrugged his hands from her arms and walked out of the dining room, fumbling along the wall until she found the room with the couches.

As she walked in Aaron shifted uncomfortably.

"Hey" he said, merely a voice in the darkness. She smiled half heartedly and sat on the opposite couch to the one he'd chosen to bed down on. "You ok?" He asked quietly, and Evie huffed a little half hearted laugh.

"No. We should get some sleep." Had he been listening, or had their voices been raised enough for him to hear? The house was old, walls thicker than the new builds they were using in Alexandria. Maybe he could just read her, like everyone else seemed so capable of.

She couldn't discuss her and Daryl with Aaron, not with Daryl so close. Hell, he could hear every word if she were half way across the country.

She sighed heavily and lay back on the flowery and overstuffed couch, throwing her arms behind her head so they hung over the arm rest.

In one breath he didn't want her, in the next he felt the same as she did. In a third he's hands on, and looking like he might just sweep her off her feet. She was confused and conflicted, and maybe life was difficult enough just surviving without destroying herself every damn day trying to get some feeling out of the cold hearted beast that Daryl was proving to be.

She wiped frustratedly at her face, catching Aaron looking at her as she did so.

"What?" She asked him harshly, instantly regretting her tone. She wasn't about too apologise though, she'd worn herself out as it was, and she was still so used to setting and rising with the sun, that the darkness made her eyelids heavy.

"For what it's worth, I think he needs to trust himself, too." Evie tried to stifle a yawn with the back of her hand before answering.

"Let's just get some sleep. Big day with new recruits tomorrow"

* * *

 

In the morning they made a plan. Evie and Daryl forgetting their personal issues as they went out into the unknown together. Knowing they needed to have each other's backs out there, that their trust in each other at least covered that much. Perhaps that was most important. Aaron appeared to trust them both, and that was important, too.

Daryl banged on the door with the bottom of his fist, and it shook in its frame from the sheer power. That wasn't a good start, showing these people so much strength may have had them on edge instantly. Reflecting back, Evie decided it had been the worst idea to let Daryl do the knocking, but hindsight was always such a wonderful thing.

There was a voice from inside, a rough and deep man's voice. A voice that was trying so hard to be brave, but it was full of fear. Another bad idea, these people were petrified and any move Evie and her people made would be vital to how this played out.

"This place's taken, now y'all go on back to where ya came from." Daryl looked at Evie and she scowled at him. As the female in the group did he really believe they'd listen to her? She licked her lips.

"We want to help you" she said, loud but gentle. "We have a place, a community with walls, and a doctor." She got a little closer to the door and could hear movement, a hushed exchange of voices.

"How do we know we can trust y'all?" The man asked, and Evie shrugged, knowing he'd barely see through the spy hole he was no doubt using.

"You can't" she said quietly "but we have pictures to show you, we have running water, food..." She stopped, hearing a woman's voice say quietly

"I don't like the looka that redneck."

Which made her feel so sad for Daryl. She looked at him and he shrugged his shoulders at her.

"Ain't nothin' I ain't heard before" he said, and that almost made it worse.

"Are ya willing to drop ya weapons?" Aaron moved forward, and Evie grabbed his arm before he could speak.

"No" she said, much too sharply. "No, we can't" softer now "but we are willing to let you keep yours. Please." Silence echoed back to her, heavy with atmosphere. She daren't breathe and ruin it.

Eventually there was the sound of a lock being pulled back, and the door opened. An inch, two, now ten.

Evie's breath caught as she got a look at these strangers for the first time, and she heard Aaron gasp behind her. No noise came from Daryl, but he put his hand on her back and steered her forward as the painfully skinny man and woman at the door stood aside.


	31. Chapter 31

They were starving. Their faces were drawn and thin, their skin papery and dry. Daryl gently guided a shocked Evie into the hallway which matched perfectly the one they'd gone into blind the day before.

The smell of rotting flesh was what he noticed next. Regardless of the homely and friendly enough fragrances coming from these people. Something in here was dead or dying. It was worse than the walkers, whose scent kind of faded with age. This smell was strong, and along side it, an undertone of fear and shame.

He sniffed at the air as inconspicuously as he could.  
Dying. Definitely not dead but absolutely well on its way to being.

"Please" Aaron said carefully. "We aren't here to hurt you. We want to help you." He reached into his pack and the woman who opened the door pulled a gun from the back of her pants aiming it at Aaron. Daryl and Evie instantly had weapons at the ready, but new people emerged, a second man and woman both with guns drawn. Aaron dropped the bag and kicked it gently over to the woman who had opened the door.

"I wanted to show you photographs of our community, so you can see what we're offering." The woman looked down at the bag and grimaced.

"Ya can't help us. Y'all should've left us alone." Daryl watched these people with narrow eyes and a sinking heart. They weren't going to accept their help, no matter what they said. Here they stood, all pointing weapons at each other in an odd circle, and still that rotting smell, It wasn't coming from any of these four.  
He wrinkled his nose a little and noticed Evie putting her gun away and her hands up. He glared at her hard, hoping to get her to rethink that, but she shook her head at him.

"We really want to try." She said gently. The smell of rotten flesh that had attacked Daryl as they first walked in suddenly grew strong and overbearing. A third man had emerged, the last of the five Aaron had said was here. He shuffled into view slowly, and instantly Daryl knew he had been bitten.

His face was whiter than seemed humanly possible, and sweat ran rivers down his thin and grimy face. It stuck his clothes to his frail body, and he leaned heavily against the wall for support.

"Oh shit" Daryl said quietly to himself.

He was concentrating so hard on that hideous fragrance that he didn't realise what was about to happen, couldn't have predicted it.

Suddenly, with a strength she certainly didn't seem capable of, the woman who had emerged into the hallway from nowhere grabbed Evie by her coat collar and shoved her firmly through a door as the second man moved forward and slammed it shut, using a key to lock the door in a quick burst of movement. Daryl grabbed the man by the shoulders and held him up off the floor against the wall next to the door.

"What the hell are ya doin'?" He asked aggressively, fighting to keep his fangs firmly in place as the second woman pointed her gun at his head.

"Insurance" the new woman said. "Put Steven down" Daryl felt his face sneer, and caught Aaron from the corner of his eye looking calm and collected despite this sudden change in circumstance.

The whole thing had gone to pot in a matter of seconds, and still that rotting smell assaulted Daryl's olfactory senses, making him want to gag.

* * *

Evie banged against the door, hard, and tried the knob in a fit of energy and nonsense. She'd heard it lock, why was she wasting her time?

Instead she put her back to the door and took a deep calming breath. She wouldn't be in here long. Daryl and Aaron weren't about to let that happen.

She reached out her hands and felt around in the darkness, she was in some sort of closet, maybe a cloakroom. She felt a coat hook, another, and stumbled over a pair of boots as she moved.

Then a groan floated quietly towards her and her heart stopped. Cold sweat stood out on her forehead and she fought against the burst of energy that had her banging on the door returning.

She backed up to the entrance again, hitting it with a cold hard slap. Her breathing was fast paced and she struggled to calm down. Another groan tumbled through the air and she realised it was no closer. This creature hadn't moved. It could be stuck, or so badly broken that it couldn't move.

Or maybe the freaks next door, keeping a bitten man alive and lying to him about a cure, had kept a dead person tied up in here, a closet, a mud room, as they lied to themselves that help would surely come.

Maybe this meant they were too far gone to help.

She didn't realise she'd drawn her knife until she went to push herself from the door, it was raised by her ear and ready for action. She was glad she had this second nature to defend herself now, since being with Daryl it had emerged from nowhere.

She eased herself slowly forward, and as the walker caught her scent the moans grew more excited.

Her eyes were beginning to adjust to the dimness, the only light that under the door she'd entered by, and she saw feet shuffling the other side. Vaguely she could hear the murmurs of people talking, but she was following the sound of the lone walker in this large closet, and she muted other noises as best she could.

It was ahead of her, slightly to the left. She edged carefully forward, her right hand on the wall with the coat hooks, her nose waiting to catch a whiff of death which may help lead her the right way.  
Another grunt came from her immediate left, and she turned that way, her hair swinging around her shoulder wildly, and then caught.

Shit. It wasn't the first time her curls had been a problem. She strained her eyes as the walker's frustrated, hungry movements had it wrapping its hand in her hair more thoroughly, more painfully, and she felt the rip as a chunk broke free of her scalp.  
She clenched her teeth to keep from yelling and winding the bastard up more than it already was.

Her eyes were adjusting painfully slowly, it now the walker was only arm's length away she could see it was a woman. She thought for a split second that this was originally a group of three couples, then reality shot back to her and she grabbed the hand in her hair with her left hand, reaching forward to stab the sucker.

But it's head moved and she cried out in frustration as she sliced its neck instead of burying her knife in the creature's head. She was covered in a waterfall of blood and black slime.

The hand in her hair twisted again and she couldn't help the yell of pain and anger that left her mouth.

She sneered and reached forward again, and the walker's other arm reached and flailed and pawed at her, eventually finding purchase and burying its nails into her flesh.

* * *

 

"Put Steven down and we might let the girl out." The woman pointing a gun at Aaron said. She hadn't looked at the pack by her feet again, wasn't slightly interested in what they had to offer. "Do you have medicine?" She asked Aaron, and he nodded enthusiastically

"Yes. Yes we have a doctor, an infirmary"

"What about now, some Advil or Tylenol for the fever" Daryl huffed a short laugh and shook his head.

"Ain't nothin' gonna bring that fever down, ain't nothin gonna save ya friend" he slowly lowered Steven to the floor and turned to the people now surrounding him.

"Let Evie go, n we'll leave. Ya don't want our help, n frankly Y'aint gonna get nowhere with no damn Tylenol. We'll save it for people who might actually have a chance." He went to grab the bag from the floor when they heard Evie's frustrated grunt from the closet. Daryl span and was at the door again in a second, faster than anyone could even observe, but he didn't care what they did or didn't think. They were dumb and they deserved to be confused at least after what they were doing to their poor friend. He was suffering, rotting from the inside, and they were letting it happen.

He banged on the door, and beside him he heard the unmistakable click of a handgun being cocked. He ignored it.

"Step away" one of the men said, and he didn't even care who was who anymore. "Get away from the damn door!" The male voice was heavy with panic and fear, and Daryl turned his head as Evie cried out again.

"What's in there?" He asked, but as a third cry came from the closet he couldn't wait for an answer. He bolstered the door with his shoulder, knocking it from its hinges and tearing part of the wall out, too. It crumbled and littered shards of plaster around his shoulders, but he paid it no mind, striding into the closet.

His eyes instantly adjusted to the dim light, and he saw Evie held by the tied walker, one hand in her hair, the other holding her forearm. She was struggling just to keep out of reach of the damn thing's teeth.

He darted forward, grabbed Evie's knife from her hand and stabbed the walker deftly in the temple. As the arms stopped waving and grabbing Evie fell back a little, and she looked square at Daryl as she lifted her right arm, showing him the deep scratches there. Now he smelled her fear, and saw the blood covering her face and chest, and an anger bubble in him he feared he would be unable to control.

Daryl's fangs descended of their own volition, and he grabbed Evie up in his arms with a roar as he carried her from the room. He bypassed the foolish people, who gaped at him angrily.

"Jenny?!" He heard someone scream as he placed Evie on her feet next to Aaron. He turned and saw two women and two men, the healthy ones, heading for the closet.

"She's dead. I did what ya couldn't do." He sighed, he knew this would be hard on them. "She was dead, and he will be too" he pointed at the sick man who smelled like he was already long gone.

"You!" One of the men stormed for Daryl with his gun raised in his shaking hands. "You did this!" He accused, shouting the house down. Daryl calmly shook his head as he heard Aaron gasp. He'd noticed Evie's scratches. God damn it.

"No" Daryl said much more evenly than he expected. "They are both already dead. Use ya head," the man with the gun raised it higher as his shaking arms threatened to drop it. His face screwed up with heavy emotions, then straightened again as he fought for control.

"I should kill you!" Daryl sighed and shook his head again.

"But ya won't" he said.

"I will!" A woman stormed towards him, and he was starting to get bored and frustrated. Evie needed his help. He didn't need this "You and ya friends! Ya just killed an innocent woman, she did nothing to you. To anyone! Why d'ya do that?" Tears coursed down the woman's face and Daryl felt deflated.

"We're gonna leave. Ya need to think about what ya waitin' for. Help that ain't comin'. A cure that don't exist."

"Y'all aint goin' anywhere" the woman spat, waving her weapon hazardously. "I'm gonna make sure none of ya hurt anyone else"

"Daryl?" He heard Aaron's concern behind him, and cursed his luck. There was no question Daryl could save Evie, but it had to be now, and these people were just holding him up.

* * *

Evie watched the exchange with less and less interest as sweat again stood out on her skin, and she began to shake with the growing fever inside her.  
This was it. She was scratched by a walker, rotten flesh still embedded in her skin. This was the end.

She welcomed the darkness as it enveloped her. It wasn't so bad, dying. It was warm and blurry and quiet. She'd never truly know if Daryl would have ever loved her, but that was ok. Now she could come back and watch over him.

It was all ok.


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings of steaminess ensue from here. Nothing too graphic in this chapter but the next one might be a big hot and heavy

It was like swimming.  
She could hear talking, but the words were difficult to make out. She thought, maybe, she'd leave her body soon. She hoped soon, she was so tired. She felt Daryl pick her up in his solid arms, her head rolling against his chest.

"Still breathin'" he grunted, and then it all went silent and black again.

*****

"Tie it off" Aaron, yelling. "What are you doing?!" She tried to open her eyes, and pain shot through her arm and up into her shoulder.

She didn't manage to see anything more than whisper of light. The noises faded, Daryl grunting with effort the last thing she heard.

*****

"Wake up" she heard a whisper. Freya. "For the love of God Evie, he'll suck you dry"

*****

Something was snuffling at her. Some fox or possum, maybe a raccoon. She groaned and tried to turn over but was held still. Her tongue felt too big for her mouth, and there was a horrid taste there. She didn't mind, she was used to animals sniffing around her in her sleep. They could get under the wires Daryl strung around them to keep them safe. The strings of junk she was sure wouldn't save them, but had actually managed to keep them alive this far.  
She tried to go back to sleep, but the sniffing and snuffling was relentless. She screwed her eyes up as something shot through her arm.

Pain. Like the creature snuffling had bitten her, or scratched her.

 _Scratched her_.

Her eyes flew open and she tried to sit upright, a gasping noise coming from her dry throat. A silent scream. A hand rested on her shoulder lightly, yet strong enough to hold her still. Panicked, she looked down and saw Daryl bent over her, his mouth at the deep and dark scratches in her arm.

She tried to speak, though no sound came from her lips, and Daryl looked up, eyes bright and glowing, fangs extended, her blood clinging desperately to the hairs around his mouth and chin.

"It's ok" he said calmly "y'ok." She watched him a long moment before throwing her head back to the hard ground beneath her, trying to remember and forget how she got here in equal measure.

She was dead. She died. The fever... She closed her eyes again against the light which penetrated through her lids despite her best efforts.  
"Why are _you_ drinking from _me_ , when I'm injured?" She asked quietly, remembering the ghost of a conversation she may or may not have had with her sister. Her throat scratched with every word. She stared at a canopy of tree branches above her head. Wondering how long she had been out.

"Suckin' out what I can" Daryl said calmly before his head went back to her arm.

"Aaron?" She asked next. Her acceptance of this never ceased to amaze her. When the dead got back up she was sure she was dreaming, but when Daryl revealed he was a vampire she just took him at his word.

Maybe the unreal reality they lived in now had numbed her.  
Daryl hadn't, though. Pain coursed up to her shoulder again and she sucked in a sharp breath.

"Sorry" Daryl whispered without stopping "Aaron's resting. We had a, uh, busy Mornin'" Evie rolled her head to one side and saw Aaron asleep a few feet away. She wondered if he would now have his own questions about this, about Daryl. He'd certainly have a few about people.

"Those people?"

"Ya need to relax, Evie." Daryl cut her off, sitting back on his haunches and biting into his own wrist. He grimaced as she watched him, and he held his arm out for her.

A sudden hunger burned inside her and she sat up fast, covering the teeth marks with her mouth, sucking greedily at Daryl's skin. She thought she should be ashamed of being so keen, but Daryl's blood was a drug she hoped she'd never have to give up.

As the colours of the world burst into life around her, as Daryl became this rainbow haloed spectre in front of her eyes, he gently pushed her away.

"Enough," he said softly "ya gettin' greedy." Evie shot him a lazy smile.

"But you taste like Heaven. No, you taste like God Himself." Daryl snorted softly and threw her a half smile, her weird Vampire high rubbing off, she guessed. "What about him?" She asked, nodding carefully in Aaron's direction, "those people, doesn't everyone expect me to die?" Daryl watched her narrow eyed before answering.

She wiped a hand across her mouth and giggled to herself. She could feel her own blood pulsing through her veins. She took a deep breath, scenting Daryl and Aaron in one. Crushed autumnal leaves and fresh mown grass were juxtaposed in her nose. Odd smells that shouldn't go together mixing beautifully.

She looked at Daryl and watched him glowing. He was beautiful, even though his remarkably coloured eyes scowled at her. Greens and golds interlaced with the blues and blacks. She could see every colour, even though she lay far beneath him.

* * *

 

"I can, sort of, adjust his memory" Daryl said at length, fighting to find the right words. "I can take what he saw, create blanks, n fill 'em in...change it a little. I ain't done it before but it seems to be workin'." Evie screwed her face up quizzically

"How can you tell?" Daryl shrugged a little.

"Hard to explain, I put him to sleep. He'll probably be out 'til Mornin'." Merle had given him very few lessons in vampiric living. Luckily, Daryl thought, memory adjustment was one of them. He just had to ensure what he gave Aaron was believable. Difficult, when the lessons from Merle had been given in short bursts between bouts of drinking, drugs and women.

"And those people?" She asked about them again and Daryl chewed his lip.

"Don't gotta worry 'bout them no more" he said, hoping to finalise the subject. Her big green eyes, now glowing ethereal, narrowed as she studied him. She nodded gently.

"Ok" she agreed, quiet and firm, though he wasn't sure whether she was accepting they were dead and that was that, or just accepting his last word on the matter.

He watched her taking in the new bright world around her, though she didn't seem as intoxicated as normal, his blood in her must be having the same effect as always, but like any drug, it just heightened her initial mood.  
The wonderment was gone. In its place, Evie looked thoughtful and wary.

"I thought I was dead" she remarked quietly, picking up and sniffing at a fallen leaf. The words and the actions didn't go together, and Daryl had to take a moment to register the two separately. He rolled his shoulders a little, uncomfortably.

"Not while I'm around. Y'aint gotta worry 'bout that" she snorted gently.

"There'll come a day..."

"Not for a while" he snapped, cringing as he did so, but she shrugged without looking at him, continuing to observe the world around her like it was new but, actually, not all that interesting.

She put her ear to a tree, which made him want to smile, though he held his face firm as it sat. She had more to say. Whether she would say it or not remained to be seen but he could feel her questions under the surface of everything else he felt from her. Under the nonchalance, under the fear he was yet to understand.

"Have you ever adjusted my mind?" He shook his head though she wasn't looking in his direction. She knew, though. She didn't need to look.

"First time." He said quietly, unsure of where her thoughts were leading. She stepped slowly, carefully, around the tree she'd been listening to, disappearing from sight and making his heart hammer against his ribs. He tried not to think of her as his, but it was difficult after everything. After this feeling that had grown from nothing. A feeling he didn't think he had a name for. Something he'd never felt before.

She appeared again, still slow and careful in her movements.

"What about the group?" She queried, looking up into the tree canopy and smiling as the sun warmed her skin between the speckled shadow of the leaves. She closed her eyes and Daryl watched her chest rise and fall as she breathed in deep the scent of the sunlight. Warm and comforting as he knew it to be.

"No" he said "I don't wanna, I haven't needed to. I wanna be as human as possible. Bein' this" Evie turned to him and began to step towards him "it sucks. Hard. I hate every moment knowin' I'm gonna outlive everyone'a my family n friends" he shrugged as she approached him, laying her ever comforting soft hand on his arm. "Knowin' I'mm'a outlive you." He shook his head and tried to turn away from her, from those big green eyes which threatened to tear down his walls. But her hand found his cheek, and she stroked it gently. Her hand was soft as feathers and Daryl let his eyes drift closed, pushing his face into her hand like a needy cat.

"It doesn't have to be that way" she whispered dreamily, and Daryl's eyes snapped open. He grabbed her hand in his and hissed at her.

"It can only be that way." He growled throatily and watched her eyes widen a little. She wouldn't change his mind. She deserved to live a full human life. Changing her would be selfish.

"I'm not scared" she whispered with a smile, and it just enraged him more.

"I know" he conceded, her calmness washing over him in that irritating way her emotions tended to. "N I can't seem to make ya see sense, but I can make this decision." She cocked an eyebrow at him, and he regretted his choice of words.

"You think Merle was selfish?" She asked, a teasing lilt to her voice brought on by the volume of his blood flowing through her. He sighed a heavy breath and shook his head slightly.

* * *

 

"That was different" Evie huffed annoyed.

"All I know right now is that a while ago I was sure I was dying, and for whatever reason you can't let that happen." She shrugged her shoulders. "But what if I get that close again and you're not there?" He shrugged right back, shook his head.

"Ain't happenin'" he said, but she was becoming incensed.

"You don't know that. You can't know that" her hands found her hair as she grew more frustrated. She glanced over Daryl's shoulder at Aaron's sleeping form. "At risk of outing yourself you saved me." She let her hands drop, her heart was hammering, her breath coming in short sharp bursts. Daryl was moving towards her.

"That's got to mean more than just... Just..." She looked at him, glowing, colourful, beautiful, and now his dirt streaked face was inches from hers. "More..." She managed, finding herself watching his mouth and losing her train of thought, her words entirely.

His lips landed on hers, soft and unexpected. She almost fell for it, but sense caught up and she shoved him away from her, before he could push her away. She wiped at her mouth.

"Don't do that." She eyeballed him narrowly. "It is cruel and unfair" she tossed her hair away from her face and looked away from his eyes, which had narrowed to slits. His breathing was heavy and almost laboured, and when she reached out to feel his emotion, all she got was an intense need. "You can't kiss me, and expect me to fall for it every time. You'll distance yourself again. I can't keep going on like this." she put her hands to her head and screwed her eyes closed, not wanting to look at him. His blood was making any emotion she felt heightened, and looking at him looking at her in the dark way he was almost floored her again.

"Don't you get it?" He asked roughly, his voice thick and close to her again. Without opening her eyes she knew he was just inches from her, having moved in his fast and silent way.

She shook her head.

"No. I don't." She opened her eyes and looked at him. "You need to make it a fuck of a lot clearer, cause right now I don't know if you want me or you're just trying to shut me up." Tears welled unhindered in her eyes, and it made her angry that she could get so overwhelmed by him. This asshole who couldn't decide what the hell he wanted from one minute to the next. Who refused to trust himself enough to just give in to the feelings she knew without a shadow of a doubt were there, behind his beautiful narrow eyes, in his handsome and stubborn head.

Slowly, seemingly unbidden, his hand raised and wound itself gently in her curls. He looked her in the eye and took a deep breath. Evie breathed in his scent while she still could. Crisp frosty mornings and warm woollen jumpers.

"Don't cry" he whispered, untangling his hand and chasing a tear with his finger down her cheek. He cupped her chin and gently pulled her forward as she parted her lips, expectantly.  
His hand moved again, now in the hair at the back of her head as their lips met once more. He pulled her in to him, their mouths melting together as he kissed her passionately yet softly.

She tried to pull back, and after a moment he let her. He put his forehead against hers, his eyes closed, his mouth open as he appeared to fight for breath. She watched him cautiously as she herself stood breathless.

"You must know how I feel" he said eventually, and his hand firmed up in her hair. Finally his eyes opened and she gently shook her head.

"I need to hear it, Daryl" he swallowed, visibly struggling. Evie stood firm, though. She didn't want to be trapped in the cycle of falling for him and being knocked back time and again as he denied to feel what she was so sure he must.

"I love you" his voice cracked, his eyes brightened, and his teeth descended "I'm falling in love with you."

* * *

 

The words did something to him, freed some burden, and suddenly he felt able to do this without breaking her. They had an effect on Evie, too, and she threw her arms around him, thrusting her mouth on to his and her hands into his hair. Pulling and tugging him closer to her.

Her scent grew powerful, and though he was scared, petrified, of what might or might not happen, he let himself get lost in her. He let his hands find her waist, her hips, he slowly ran his hands over her body, not realising they'd stopped kissing, and they both breathed heavily, watching his hands.

He licked his lips, mindful of his fangs, and ran his hands up her torso, gently running his thumbs across her breasts. Her breath caught audibly, and he looked at her face again, a smile spreading on his own face as he saw and smelled her pulse in her neck.

He leaned forward and gently kissed her where her blood throbbed, and she gasped, partially in fear. He brought his lips to her ear and whispered

"Trust me" as gently as he could. She pressed her body in to his, pushed her breasts into his hands now trapped between her and his own chest. He grazed his teeth against her neck teasingly, and smiled as her breath caught again. He inhaled her as deeply and fully as he could, wondering if she'd smell as good at her other pulse points.

A growl escaped him, low and rumbling, as her body pressed against his a little more.

 


	33. Chapter 33

Something scraped against her neck and she knew it was his teeth, which she'd watched escape from his gums with an audible swoosh.

Everything rushed back to her in a second, how she was nearly raped and killed by the very man she was now wrapped around. Her breathing stopped, a final gasp escaping her and she felt his head turn into her a little more.

"Trust me" he said, quiet and rough and deep. He must have sensed her fear. The soft breath of his words tickled her ear and she felt she could, always knew she could, but the thought that he was finally letting go and trusting himself had her writhing her body against his. Apparently there was something incredibly sexy about a man in control telling her he loved her.

His mouth was on hers again, his tongue forcing her lips apart and diving almost completely inside her. He lifted her up into his arms and her legs wrapped around him of their own volition as he held her easily, cupping her ass.  
She pulled her head from his, suddenly worried. They couldn't do this here, in the open, with Aaron asleep just a few feet away.  
He seemed to read her mind, though, and smiled darkly, his fangs shining like beacons, and pulled her in again.

"It's safe" he whispered into her hair, inhaling audibly. "Ya safe with me." She was still unsure. He placed her back on her feet gently.

This wasn't how she imagined this would happen, but his hands were at her waist again, pulling at her buttons and deftly revealing her faded, worn underwear. He pulled her close, lifting her off her feet once more and backing her firmly into a wide oak. His mouth was open as he drank her in with his eyes.

She noticed the venom beading on the needle point of his canines and it was too much, so much like before when Daryl had lost his mind. His groin pressed against her inner thigh and she felt his eagerness there, and there was no more room for logical thought as she realised that while she was stuck in her own head he had moved at his lightning speed and somehow, some way, removed her jeans completely from one leg.

Now she was pushing her back into the tree, her legs in the air, a cold draft attacking the dampness between them.

His hand stroked at her damp panties, and stupidly she thought how unkempt she would be, but he didn't seem to mind as he moved again, and pulled her underwear aside with his warm and wanting hand. He wound the soft curls at her mound in his fingers still managing to hold her aloft in one single hand. A grumble vibrated against the flesh of her neck and she pushed herself towards him as an odd noise escaped her closed mouth.

She could swear he was smiling as he moved his head away, still toying with her pubic hair. She grunted, frustrated, nothing in her now but an animal need, all fear and confusion gone.

Painfully slowly he ran a single finger down the opening where she wanted him most. It lingered a moment before coming slowly back up. She fought the urge to kick him in frustration, and tell him just to plunge into her depths, the kick would barely be felt anyway, and instead she screwed her eyes closed and bit down hard on her bottom lip.

Daryl hefted her up with both hands on the back of her thighs, her knees over his shoulders. At the same time a sudden warm wetness came upon her, and she tried desperately to look down at him suckling her clit, underwear still pulled to one side.

It had been a long time since a man had been near her, and Daryl seemed to know exactly what he was doing. She threw her head back, head butting the tree but not feeling it, unable to bear his dark, beautiful, eyes which watched her watching him. A shiver coursed up and back down her spine, but before she could give in, let loose, he stopped and carefully lowered her body again.  
He kissed her, sloppy and warm and wet, reeking of her own scent which she was smelling clearly for the first time, tasting herself on his tongue. She tasted good, fresh and sweet, and mixed with his autumnal fragrance it was bliss.

She reached for him, still fully clothed, and found his belt. She tugged at it blindly, managing on the first go to unhook the buckle. In some fit of need he pushed her hands away and attended to the zip fly himself, and removed his pants without breaking fully away from her mouth.

Gently she ran a hand over his erection, which stood firm and solid as a rock. He hadn't been wearing underwear, and the thought made her want to laugh. She held it together, just barely, if she still knew one thing in her lust crazed head it was that half naked men didn't like to be laughed at.  
She pawed at him blindly, refusing to remove her lips from his, his body was warm and unyielding, she grabbed him in her hand, gently squeezing. He broke away and hissed gently at her.

Already precum was glistening sticky at the tip. He groaned and began to move against her hand, before grabbing her thighs and lifting her again, sitting her over him. For a split second she worried about his loss of control, but she needn't have, he seemed very much in control of everything.

The rough bark of the tree scraped her ass as he gently and slowly lowered her on to him, and with a quick shuffle he slid easily between her legs. The fullness, the feeling of being at one with Daryl, and the high she was still on from his blood, rendered her blind and deaf. All there was was this as he moved inside her, he buried his face in her hair and his body quivered. She held onto his shoulders, her nails finding purchase in his flesh which reddened and began to bleed before healing and then breaking and bleeding again. He said something she didn't quite hear but as he thrust hard into her again the tell tale shake of her legs started, and she drowned out everything with her own noise.

"Can I?" he said again, and she screwed her eyes closed not really registering what he meant, whispering a breathless yes into his ear.

She barely felt the bite, a small scratch compared to the chafing of her ass onto the rough tree. She felt the draw though, as he sucked greedily at the place her neck met her shoulder.

It made it better. It was like flying. She came hard and bit into him, drawing blood with her own blunt human teeth.

Later she'd wonder just how hard she had bitten to do that, but in that moment, as the blood beaded and wept into her mouth her orgasm seemed to change direction, and it was an experience like nothing she'd ever known. The quivering eruption seemed to last hours more than seconds and she knew it was the blood doing it. He sucked again at her shoulder and she heard and felt him grumble deep in his belly as his own orgasm came.

They stopped moving, stopped crying out, all there was was their harsh and heavy breathing, which they listened to as it slowed.

Eventually Daryl unwound Evie's legs from him and placed her on the ground softly. Worried she would fall on her weakened legs, she held awkwardly onto the tree behind her. She stood, half naked and vulnerable, feeling his seed slip down her inner thigh.

His neck had healed, and she put a hand to hers noticing that she, too, was no longer bleeding from an open wound. Daryl had righted his clothes and pulled a rag from his pocket, which she gratefully accepted without a word. She wiped at her thigh wondering silently if vampires and humans could transfer disease or have children.

She hoped not. Protection hadn't exactly been the first thing on her mind, or even the last.

She watched him turn his back to her, as though to give her some privacy in wiping him away. All it did was make her feel so alone. The idea made her heart flutter and she willed silently for him to turn back to her. Instead he walked away, without a word. She reached out to him with her mind, trying to feel him through their mixed blood inside her, and got anger and regret pouring back to her.

She dressed quickly then, the colours of the world once new and exciting fading back to the dull existence they used to have for her as she gave in to a feeling of emptiness and loss.

* * *

 

Daryl watched as Evie moved gingerly around their small camp, finding her pack and taking out the box of smokes they'd been sharing.

With shaking hands she took one to her lips and tried to light it. It took several attempts. Her heavenly glow was beginning to fade. She'd shone so hard when they were, together, that he could barely look at her. Now the light seemed to be slowly getting sucked back inside her.

She placed the lighter in the cigarette carton and placed that on top of her pack. An invitation she may or may not have meant,

'Come, Daryl, sit and smoke with me in the afterglow of our furious fuck.'

She didn't look at him. Seemed, in fact, determined not to.  
Still unstable, she smoked in a thoughtful silence, right hand cupping her left elbow, flicking mindlessly at the filter tip with her thumb. He reached out with his mind, tried to feel something. Sadness. Loneliness. A tinge of her own uncertainty.

There was no fear, and no anger, he expected a strong reaction, he didn't get it. She can't have known. His blood was keeping her on the outskirts of pain.

He turned away, unable to watch anymore, unable to look upon the damage he'd done that she couldn't see. The bruises on her neck, the angry purple clouds littered across the backs of her thighs, which though now covered, he knew were there. The angry red welt on her shoulder.

He sighed quietly, wishing he'd stuck with his own goddamned rules and regulations.

_"Sh'ain't dead, baby brother, there's that at least"_

Shut up Merle. This is all your fault anyway.

_"N ya didn't think'a wha's'er name the whole time"_

Shut up Merle.

 _"She c'n feel ya, Daryl. All she feels comin' from ya is regret. She_ _don't know why, s'far as she knows, ya fucked her n regrettin' it as soon's it_ _over. Only tellin' ya what Y'already know, baby bro. These's your words in my voice. Ya gotta know that. I been dead for months, man, What the Fuck?"_

Shut. Up.

As the ghosts in his head finally fell silent Daryl continued to check their string defence system. He knew there was nothing wrong with it, but he wanted to keep busy as long as Evie was awake. He dared not own up to what he had done, because he was a coward. With his blood flowing through her veins at least a little longer, she'd soon heal, and then he wouldn't have to. Wouldn't have to explain how falling in love with someone meant that they'd get hurt and broken. He'd tried to explain before he realised what he was feeling. Now he was dumbfounded and unable to piece it all together.

He bit his lip, instantly drawing blood, and tasted his bitter self on his tongue. She didn't deserve to be left in the dark, and she didn't deserve to be hurt just because he couldn't control his instincts to grab and shove and _oh God_ it took so much just to pull his head from her cunt and not rip out the heavenly smelling artery that ran up through her thigh, pulsating right next to his head.

His fangs descended at the memory and he pulled them back with a hiss. Never again. He should have stuck to that the first time. Never again.

* * *

 

Evie cast a careful look in Daryl's direction. He'd busied himself with the stupid defence strings around their small camp. Aaron lay next to her, asleep and breathing softly.

She listened to the rhythmic in and out of his breath a while as she thought about what had just happened.

Daryl had confessed his feelings, and they'd had sex. Fine. That was fair and normal. But then? He handed her a rag! He might as well have thrown a hundred dollars carelessly at her feet before disappearing forever for how that had made her feel. Standing there half naked, feeling dirty and used.

Now she just felt angry, outraged. And how dare he make her feel that way? She narrowed her eyes at his back and threw violent swear words at him in her head. God, what an asshole.

And to think she'd let her guard down so quickly, so eagerly, for him. She scrubbed at her face, pleased to find it dry under her hands. She wondered if it had all been a lie. His actions and feelings, the confession of emotion. He was a creature designed to pull her in and make her blind to the truth, but somehow she didn't quite believe that was what had happened. But then, could that be her own mind protecting her.

Maybe he was suffering that post coital depression that men got sometimes. Only harder, because he was not a man.

She shoved her hands in her hair and growled quietly, confused and frustrated with it all. Thinking too much. She needed to stop. Daryl had proven himself to be nothing but protective, he was just doing that weird man thing of feeling sad after sex. Maybe it wasn't as good for him as for her. Maybe she shouldn't have bit him. Who knew vampire sex etiquette?

She sighed to herself. It was all too crazy and she needed to get some rest.

She stretched and scratched at her neck, drawing her hand away with a sharp intake of breath. It was sore, really sore. That had never happened when he bit her before.

Though, the last time he actually bit her he was dying, weakened by a bullet. Every other time he had fed she was already bleeding. She frowned, trying to remember, but Daryl's blood had stopped working, no doubt used up during the blissful act against the tree. The act that now had her thinking in circles and feeling sore.

She looked over at him again and caught his eyes boring into her. Her face warmed and she looked away quickly. What the hell? Now she felt she couldn't even look him in the eye? She took a deep breath and got up, deciding that sex was overrated and feeling this shit about it afterwards was stupid.

She turned back to Daryl, opened her mouth to speak, but then the sound of hooves had them both turning south, and Buttons appeared shining, beautiful, and petrified.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to make the sex in this real. As much as it will be smutty, isn't it always just a little awkward? So that's why it ends this way, at least their first time.   
> Hope I didn't disappoint too much.


	34. Chapter 34

The horse was panic stricken, and as it saw them it whinnied and bucked, before rearing up and pummelling its front hooves in the air. Daryl noticed that its eyes almost took over its whole face, and it's nostrils flared, screaming out breath more like a dragon than a damn horse.

His front hooves landed again, rocking the ground beneath them all, and the horse turned a 360 before snorting, tossing its mane, and running full pelt north again. Daryl looked around, Evie's mouth was open slightly, stunned by what they had witnessed. She went to speak, ask what the hell, Daryl guessed, but he cut her off, knowing exactly what had wound the horse up. He could sense it, smell it.

"Walkers" he whispered, rushing to Evie's side and grabbing her arm. She tensed, still caught up in their personal situation, but they didn't have time for that. Daryl was careful not to squeeze too hard, not wanting to bruise her and damage the tatters of their relationship further. He could feel her anger at the whole thing vibrating through her arm. "There must be a lotta them" he continued before she could argue or rip her arm away. As if on cue the first groans, distant, quiet, but as ever unrelenting, reached his ears. Evie showed no signs of hearing them, hopefully they would have enough time to get away.

"I'll wake Aaron" she said, and Daryl suddenly remembered the sleeping Alexandrian for the first time in over an hour.

"No" he said, cursing their luck. "He won't wake up. Not until mornin'" Evie's eyes widened, and Daryl had to look away. The accusation was written all over her face. This was his fault, how were they going to keep themselves out of trouble with Aaron asleep?

"We need to _move_ " she hissed, as if he didn't know. She was looking to him for the answer, and he said the first thing that came to mind.

"Run, Evie." She frowned at him, he dropped her arm and nodded in Aaron's direction. "I can deal with him. You need to run as fast and as far as you can." Her eyes remained narrow, uncertain, and he wanted to shake her and push her to get her started.

"Where?" He didn't know, he didn't care. She needed to go, the walkers were descending on them and he could tell already there were too many for them to take on.

"I'll find you, I'll follow you, please Evie, just go." She looked hurt, and still unsure. But she nodded firmly and turned on her heel, running in the direction that Buttons had fled. He watched her a while, until she was a speck in the distance. She didn't look back, she didn't hesitate once she got going. For once she did as he asked, He couldn't figure out if that made him feel good or not. He was pleased she had the strength to go it alone, like she had been so long ago, but she'd not even felt like she was scared, worried, sorry to leave him.

He couldn't dwell on that though, he had to get Aaron out of danger. He turned south, where Buttons had emerged, and where he could now just see the 100 deep herd of walkers in the distance, ambling and shuffling their way. With Aaron in his arms he'd be unable to fight back, he had to hope he was fast enough and that Aaron wouldn't hinder him too much.

* * *

 

Evie slowed her pace a little, holding her side where a stitch was a burning needle point, right where she'd been arrowed in a life she could barely remember, it seemed so long ago. The night Daryl had saved her life, again.

She decided she needed to give up the smokes as she shuffled her pack on her back. It too was causing her pain, banging and crashing against her as she ran, the strap biting into her shoulder where the welt was still singing from Daryl's bite.

She chanced a look behind her, and there was nothing but the expanse of field she'd run through. She stopped moving, bending at the waist to catch her breath. Where was Daryl? He'd promised to be right behind her. He'd kept his promises so far. She couldn't help but wonder if the shift in their relationship now would change that. Change him. She huffed a breath, _stop being ridiculous_ , and straightened. He said he'd find her, and she didn't doubt it, but where to go now? She scanned the area around her, seeing nothing but flat field leading to covered woodland.

 _God dammit Daryl_. She had no idea what to do. She couldn't spend too long thinking about it, either. A walker, separate to those which had been on Buttons' tail, emerged from the trees in the distance. She rolled her eyes and went to turn, to run in a new direction, but she saw a clear hoof print heading off to the east. She stamped into the ground next to it as best she could, leaving her own print, and chased Buttons down, hoping she'd find him and shelter. Hoping Daryl would keep his word and come for her.  
  
Eventually she came upon a fenced field, with a wooden post and rail not four feet high. Beyond, having jumped in in his fit of fear, was buttons, happily munching at the long grasses on a steep slope inside. She narrowed her eyes. Was the whole place fenced in, was anything else fenced in there, too? Once she was in, getting out in a hurry could be a problem for her.

Not knowing where else she could go, she grabbed her knife and carved a large D, an A and an E in the wood, hoping she had either run a straight line or that Daryl would take the same route. She sheathed her knife and sighed. There was a lot of hoping going on recently. She put her hands on the top rail and climbed carefully over, trying not to think how Daryl would manage that with a sleeping Aaron, or even how Daryl would get this far. She tried not to think about the lack of shelter, the fact that she was pretty lost, or that Buttons could still be flighty enough to bolt.

She didn't look at him, not directly. She knew she should appear as Non threatening as possible, and hell, You didn't grow up in South Georgia without learning a thing or two about horses. She edged towards him as she moved across the field, careful of her footing, trying to keep half an eye out for danger without emanating such fear towards the gelding. Sweat ran in her eyes and she blinked it away, trying not to make any sudden movements.  
He'd stopped grazing, and was looking at her curiously.

"Hey buddy" she whispered out to him, scanning around her without moving her head. She didn't have a rope, she'd be lucky if she got any where near him like this. As she edged a little closer she noticed something over the edge of the mound she'd almost crested. A building. She gasped at the sight of it, and Buttons flinched away from her, shuffling his feet and snorting softly before getting back to his snack.  
Stables. A grin spread on her mouth and she could hardly believe what she was seeing. Buttons had led her to a stable.

Knowing it could be full of walkers, or it could be empty, and also knowing it could be harbouring people or even dead horses, Evie began to edge towards it. Wishing she wasn't falling on hope, again, but hoping anyway. Everything left her mind but that building, and the possibilities it held. Screw Daryl and his intimacy issues, this was Shelter and She had found it, on her own. She was awesome! She ignored Buttons now, who paid her no mind anyway, and descended the side of the slope.

* * *

 

Daryl carried Aaron over his shoulder like a fireman. With one hand free to use his knife, and if he had to put Aaron down it worked out he could shrug him off quite quickly and easily. He had to carry Aaron's pack, which was bulky, cumbersome, but he was strong and it wasn't too bad once he got going.

He fought off the walkers he could, first and foremost. There was no point leading 100 walkers to just follow them, or stumble across any other hapless survivor out here. He took down half with ease, stabbing and slashing, kicking and punching. At one point he ripped a head from a pair of shoulders and used the tattered remains of the skull to beat another asshole to death. But they started backing him towards their camp and he knew he'd have to grab Aaron and go, so he did.  
He ran as fast as his legs could carry him. Trees seemed to gracefully bow out of his way, waving him past with barely dressed branches.

He came upon a clearing, and something about it slowed him to an easy jog. The ground was flat, open, and once upon a time well kept. He took a look around him, Aaron hanging over his shoulder like a rag doll. He tossed his hair from his eyes and caught sight of the footprint Evie had left him, and as he approached it her scent hit his nostrils like a blow. He breathed her in, lost for a moment in a snatched memory of the scent coursing through her femoral artery as he...

He cut the thought off. Now wasn't the time to reminisce about sex. He felt his face sneer. Damn act of lust and sin was more trouble than it was worth, it seemed. Evie was out there, and no matter how well she left tracks for Daryl, she was alone, and Aaron needed somewhere safe to sleep off Daryl's memory adjustment until morning.

She was following Buttons. Daryl smiled to himself. That horse meant so damn much to her, and he vaguely wondered why as he headed off in the direction the prints led.

He leapt over the fence with their initials on, easily even with Aaron a deadweight over his shoulder, Evie's fragrance of rain and summer pouring off where she'd touched the fence and left her mark for him. He didn't stop to breathe her in this time, it was getting late, the sun starting its descent to sunset, and there was no time to get caught up with memories and fantasies. He dashed up the steep incline to the top, smelling both the horse and Evie clearly. Aaron stirred on his shoulder but didn't wake. He spied the barn and headed for it automatically, Evie's fragrance firm in his head the whole way, assuring him that this was the right direction.

There was a walker discarded haphazardously on the ground outside, surrounded by strands of hay. Daryl looked at it as he passed. She had stabbed it in the temple, and it seemed that as it crumbled it had taken part of her tshirt with it. The strip of faded red fabric almost stopped him in his tracks, but the only blood here was the thick, black, ooziness from the walker which stained the stray hay, and he convinced himself Evie was ok. He'd know if she wasn't, he was sure of that.

* * *

 

Inside the stables were perfect. Evie could hardly believe her luck. There was a small tack room full of horse bits and saddles, and stalls for four horses. She walked through in front of each half open stall door, reading the name plaques one by one.

Apollo, Zeus, Maximilian, Nimbus.

She wondered who Buttons really was. Which Stable could possibly be his home. She wasn't simple enough to think this was all coincidence. Buttons had run here for a reason, Buttons had wanted to be somewhere safe.

She walked back to the front of the line of stalls and chewed her lip. There was a stack of hay bales behind her, not too far from the large double doors she'd entered, and Buttons was bound to be hungry. She grabbed a bale in both hands, the string keeping it together biting into her fingers as she lifted it awkwardly and headed for the doors. She heard a creak behind her, but didn't think much of it, old buildings did that, especially wood structures, and winter was coming on so fast the stables were bound to be settling into the new damp and cold weather.

She kicked the door open a little wider with a leather booted it and groaned as she lifted the hay bale a little higher in her hands. But her voice echoed back to her, a matching grunt from behind, and she span, dropping the bale of hay and trying to draw her knife, which caught in its sheath at her hip. She cursed aloud and tugged again as the walker neared. He had a horse rake in his hand and Evie surmised, even in her panic, that this guy had been a horse person before he was bitten. He'd come out of the stable marked as 'Nimbus'.

The bite was clear, obvious. Half his checked shirt was missing on his torso and a large bite mark, bloody and oozing, was visible there. Evie tugged again at her knife and it came free just as horse boy reached for her, and she dodged his hands too slowly as his free hand clawed for her shirt. There was no Daryl here to save her life this time, she'd have to be more careful. She jerked away and her shirt ripped right across, leaving her in a baby tee with her belly exposed.

"God _dammit_ ," she whispered, bringing her knife up and stepping backwards out of the door. She stumbled into the hay bale and began to fall, and horse boy walker fell on top of her. She stabbed him quickly in the temple as they tumbled together, and he stopped moving, spraying herself with blood as she pulled the knife back.

She'd decided she'd need a new knife pouch, this wasn't the first time her knife had caught and nearly killed her. She hefted the walker off and heard a nickering behind her.

Buttons.

She straightened herself out and looked at him. He'd notice the hay and was clearly wondering if it was safe to walk to the unknown human in his need for food. He eyed her carefully with one eye, the other invisible to Evie as he stood side on. Evie took a breath and grabbed the bale again, clicking her tongue at Buttons as she moved back inside the stable building.

She lost faith that he would follow her in pretty quickly. She stood with her hands on her hips, eyes going over the name plaques again, reading them with her lips moving, but not taking anything in, without realising, and without sound. So she was surprised to hear the soft exhale behind her, warm breath moving her hair slightly. She took a long slow stride forwards and turned carefully to find him behind her. He was still tense, jittery, and she was surprised he'd stepped passed the walker she had put down without freaking out and bolting. Maybe he wasn't so flighty as they all expected.

He tossed his head and glared at her, straight on now, and panic rose in her belly, the thought that he might rush her crossed her mind and she stepped aside out of his way. But he didn't rush her. He slowly walked into the stable building, sniffing the air as he did so, looking for the hay. He nickered softly, stamping a foot impatiently. 

"Apollo?" Evie asked him, as if he might turn around and answer. "Zeus?" Buttons tossed his head again, looking like he was nodding. "Maximilian, maybe?" He stared at her blankly, and she pointed out the hay to him. He snorted and she moved her arm back, still cautious.

"Nimbus?" He turned his head and looked at her again, and she couldn't help her smile. "That's you, isn't it?" He looked at the hay and walked over to it, his hooves clip clopping on the stone floor. "Nimbus. Dark cloud" Evie said in awe as Buttons, or Nimbus, began to pull at the single hay bale, ignoring her completely, feeling safer now he was home and eating.


	35. Chapter 35

He stepped into the stable over the dead walker and took a cautious look around.

Evie wasn't here, that much he knew instantly. Hay littered the floor and the stable doors all stood open. Four in all. Each was clean and had fresh straw down, like someone had tidied them all up just before or after the world went crazy and the horses all trampled away. He narrowed his eyes, scenting the room. She'd been here, that much was obvious, as had that horse she and Aaron seemed hell bent on capturing.

After a quick sweep which was barely needed, Daryl placed Aaron on the floor in the stall marked as belonging to a horse called Apollo, and left him there on the fresh straw, locking the bolt on the door to keep Aaron safe inside from any danger which might come out of nowhere.

He needed to find Evie, and Aaron would be fine until morning.  
At least he hoped so. He still wasn't sure of his mind alteration. Wouldn't be, in fact, until Aaron woke up. If Aaron woke up. The last thing they needed was to head back with another body.

He pushed those thoughts away and headed out onto the field again, eyes and ears everywhere, Evie's safety his only real concern.

He reached out with his mind to feel for her, cautious that she could be hurt and angry with him. He wondered if she'd yet found or felt the marks he'd left on her body in his mindlessness. The damage he'd created as he fought not to rip her to shreds in the throes of lust. Maybe his blood had already wiped them out.  
What came back from her knocked him back. She was happy, elated, full of the joys of Spring. He felt it as if the emotion was his rather than an echo of hers, and he knew she must be close.

It was then she came galloping towards him from the trees on the other side of the fence, her hair a flame billowing behind her. He watched, awe struck, as Buttons charged for the wooden barrier between them as if he might burst through it, but jumping at the last moment and clearing it with ease. He was tacked up in a saddle and bridle and Evie had the reigns like a pro.

He couldn't help the grin that spread on his features as they ran a little closer, the joy in Evie's heart growing stronger as they neared, but the horse noticed him suddenly, and skidded to a halt several meters away from Daryl.  
Evie spoke to the horse softly, patted its neck and squeeze her heels into his sides, but the horse took a step back instead of forwards. Daryl watched the frown on Evie's face as she spoke again to the horse and tried to egg him towards the barn, and the horse walked a small circle and snorted. Daryl was about to give up, go inside, when the horse whinnied and tossed its mane, glaring at Daryl with the whites of its eyes showing. Daryl darted forward knowing Buttons had decided he really wasn't going anywhere near the creature, the monster, in front of him, and reared up sharply, beating the air with his hooves and tossing Evie off his back.

Daryl caught her as she fell through the air, and she knocked them both down, but her fall was cushioned by his body, and he curled around her protectively as they tumbled, rolling through the grass until he was on top of her. He looked up, and Buttons was gone.

He felt Evie trying to push him away, and they shared a moment of eye contact before he let her, rolling off and on to his back.

"Y'ok?" He asked her and she didn't answer, she got up, moving like she couldn't wait to be away from him, and cursed under her breath.

"Shit" she looked down at Daryl and her eyes were narrowed and accusing.

"Damn horse is flighty" Daryl got up, dusting off his legs and ass, and now he could feel waves of anger and a disjointed forlornness coming from Evie's very core. She crossed her arms over her chest and stared at him.

"It's not the horse that's the problem" she said quietly. She looked him up and down and Daryl could have sworn she was sneering at him. "Where's Aaron?" She asked suddenly, her eyes widening and arms unfolding, worry flickering behind her eyes.

"He's safe." Daryl answered, "in the stable." Evie gave a stiff nod and turned that way, walking fast and wooden. Daryl watched her a moment before following. She was pissed, it was clear even without the noise in his head. The way she moved, rigidly, as she rushed away from him, her hair swinging behind her, her fists clenched by her sides.

* * *

 

Evie didn't like the effect Daryl had on her. That single stolen second of looking up into his eyes as he lie on top of her, his face close enough to hers that his shaggy hair gently caressed her cheek. That one second of eye contact longer than necessary and she was thrown out of her senses, close enough to kiss, she had thought. But then he rolled away, like he always did.

She clenched and unclenched her fists as she stomped towards the barn. Now Buttons was gone, again, and if Daryl kept showing up and scaring the poor horse they'd never get it back to Alexandria. Every time she thought she was getting somewhere Daryl messed it up, and she wasn't even sure she was still thinking about Buttons.

She stormed into the stable block and stopped just inside, not knowing what she planned to do, where she planned to go. She was stuck with Daryl and Aaron, and if Aaron ever woke up she'd suggest they go straight back to Alexandria. They weren't going to find anything out here, anyone still living was scared stupid, literally.

She huffed a sigh, suddenly feeling depleted, and gently pushed her unruly hair away from her face with a slightly shaking hand.

She had almost died, again.

She was about to move forward, check Aaron really was ok despite her shaking legs, when she felt Daryl behind her, his bulk creating a darkness in the doorway. She closed her eyes against the overwhelming feeling of disappointment which came off him in waves. She willed him to stop but voiced nothing, instead moving forward away from him, wanting to check on Aaron.

He was sound asleep, breathing softly. She wondered what, if anything, he would remember when he woke up. Would he ask questions? Would he wonder how they got here to the stables? She was interested to see if he would, if he'd wake with a sore head or some other symptom. She wanted to know if this had ever happened to her, and by watching Aaron she could know.

She didn't entirely trust that Daryl had never used this magic on her.  
_You're insane_ Freya hissed inside her head. _Daryl thinks the whole world of you._ Evie almost rolled her eyes.  
Feels like it. She thought, hoping to shut Freya up by looking for something else to occupy her. She unlatched the bolt to the stable Aaron was in and quietly sat beside him on the hay, looking him over for signs of distress.

"He's fine" Daryl said from the open stable gate. "He's fine now n he'll be fine later, too" Evie clenched her teeth together.

"Stay outta my head" she hissed at him, and as she looked up he looked physically hurt. She was being unfair, she knew how hard it was to ignore Daryl's emotions, but she was hurt, and he wasn't exactly making it any easier. She turned away from him, unable to bear the emotion on his face.

"You don't know he'll be fine" she said softly, looking Aaron over again as she spoke as though he wasn't there. "You hope, but you don't know." She imagined Daryl shrugging his shoulders, twitching his head a little. He didn't reply though, there was no need for him to confirm what she already knew. Daryl had no idea if anything he did was going to work. He was flying from the seat of his pants like the rest of them. She chewed her lip, unsure what was going to happen next.

"We should rest" Daryl said, as though he read her mind. It wouldn't have surprised her if he had. "Ain't too late, but we've all had a long day." She turned to look at him again, and he was stepping into the stable. He turned and looked the door behind him, pulling the top half of the gate to, as well. He sat himself the other side of Aaron, so his body rested between them as they faced each other. Evie tucked her hair behind her ears and huffed a small sigh. Silence span out, and she felt Daryl's eyes keep flicking over her.

Unable to take much more of his regret, Evie eventually lie down to sleep.

* * *

 

Daryl lie down and stared at the pitted and yellowed roof above them. Cracks in the wood made daylight visible and he watched dust float lazily in the shafts. He tried to switch off, sleep would never come but he could use the down time, but he found he couldn't. So he counted the dust particles, guessed how long until nightfall, listened to Aaron and Evie's breathing.

Evie couldn't sleep either. He could tell by the sound of her breaths. She felt confused, and as if she wanted to say something, but didn't know how. It was hard to feel that and not ask what was up with her, but she wanted him out of her head. He didn't want to upset her anymore than he already had.

It was an hour or so of to-ing and fro-Ing in her head before she spoke, and though Daryl thought he'd be relieved when she finally voiced whatever was distracting her, he wasn't ready for her question.

"What did I do to upset you?" She whispered in the dying light. He couldn't answer straight away, he was so unsure what she meant by that. He frowned and went to answer when she spoke again, not sitting up, seemingly asking the room rather than him directly. He imagined her face pinking as she decided he would never answer. A smile threatened to form on his lips but he pulled it short, it hardly seemed appropriate.

"Did I do something wrong?" She asked, almost to herself. Daryl sighed gently.

 _"Tol' ya li'l brother. I tol' ya. She can't feel nothin' but regret from ya."_ Merle had been right. He hated when Merle was right.

"Evie..." He said, moving to sit up, or at least turn on his side and face her, you did nothing wrong, he wanted to say. It was me. Always me.

"Don't" she answered, still just as quiet "I don't think I want to hear the answer. Forget I said anything" defeated. That was how she sounded. It tore at Daryl's conscience.

"Evie." He whispered, "listen, what happened... It shouldn't've..."

"No, I guess not" she cut him off curtly, Stopped him before he could finish. It shouldn't have happened that way, he wanted to say. I never meant to hurt you, upset you.

But he didn't get the chance. He heard Evie sigh and turn from her back to her side, facing away. As far as she was concerned, the conversation was done. He scowled at the roof above them, anger bubbling in his chest. If he stayed quiet now...

 _"If ya stay quiet 's over, bro."_  
Merle was right. Again.

"Evie" she didn't answer. He clenched his jaw and got up, walking over to her, standing between her and Aaron's body. He clenched his fists, she didn't move.

"I trusted myself" he said quietly. "I did what ya said, n I let go. It was foolish a me to think I could." He watched her a moment, and though her breathing spoke volumes, she was awake, listening, she didn't move. Daryl chewed gently on his lip, turned to leave, turned back to her again. "But if I could do it again, I would. It was a moment a weakness I'll never live down, at least for me, but... I meant what I said Evie. Every word. I can't take back the pain, I wish I could, I can't." He nodded to himself, almost satisfied with having his say, even though it didn't come out quite how he'd hoped.

He turned to walk away, even took a step, when he heard the rustle of straw beneath Evie's hips as she turned to face him.

"But after," she said, her voice a dry whisper in the still of the evening. Flat, the vibrations soaked up by the nest all around them. "You were so disappointed." She sniffed, Daryl imagined her wiping frustratedly at her eyes and nose. "The look on your face... I didn't ask for you to throw me against the tree, I didn't ask you to do that. Yet I'm the one facing the fallout. I thought you were just... Sad... But then it kept getting worse. Even when I left I could feel it, like you were staring daggers right into me. Like you were so incredibly disgusted that I could feel it even miles away." She stopped to take a deep breath, and Daryl waited patiently, knowing she wasn't finished. He was disheartened at how her inhale wavered.

"I thought" she let out a humourless little chuckle "I thought if I could concentrate on buttons, grab him and catch him like I swore I would, that it'd be better. But he got away. You turned up all miserable and full of downers, and he got away."

Without turning Daryl answered her. He'd grown a little angrier with every word she said, he wasn't disappointed with her, how could she possibly think that?

"Ain't symbolic" he said carefully, measured, "it's just'a damn horse." He felt, literally felt Evie roll her eyes in the darkness, and he gritted his teeth.

"I can't talk to you. I'm done." She said harshly, and Daryl span to face her in a short fast movement.

"We Ain't done, I ain't done." He felt his nails, as short as they were, biting into his palms as he clenched his fists.

"I am."

"I know what ya tryin'a do, Evie."

* * *

 

She was taken aback by that. She wasn't trying to do anything. She was exhausted trying to figure him out, that was all.

"I want to go to sleep" she said, more curtly than she meant to.

"Ya tryin'a turn me into that beast from the carpark, so you can go on thinkin' I ain't nothin' but an animal." She went to speak, but he cut her off. She noticed his hands fisted at his sides and was suddenly scared. "Ya wanna feel better about this whole thing?" He asked, but she couldn't answer, and felt she wasn't supposed to.

She hadn't thought of him getting angry, the Daryl in the car park she knew wasn't him. "Then let me tell ya why I was disappointed." He finished more softly. "Please." He added, elongating the word so he sounded like he was begging, but his voice was harsh.

Evie couldn't take her eyes from his clenched fists. The glow there, his ethereal light, was brighter than anywhere else. He was waiting for permission, and Evie nodded gently, still watching his hands.

Rather than speaking he reached forward, and she flinched away from him, he huffed impatiently and grabbed her anyway. He took her arm gently, but she couldn't help the speed with which her heart hammered in her chest.

"Calm down" he told her, and she swallowed hard, willing herself not to be so stupid. She told Daryl to trust himself, and he was trying so hard to do just that. He lifted the ragged hem of her tshirt, all that was left after her walker run in, and seemed to study her torso carefully. He shook his head, seemingly confused. "Take off ya pants" he demanded, roughly. Evie leaned away from him.

"Excuse me?" She asked incredulous. She watched Daryl's eyebrows raise,

"Shut up, Evie" he said quietly, but she noticed his face almost break into a smirk. Almost. She narrowed her eyes at him, but did as he asked. He had a point, he always had a damn point.

"Look" he said, nodding at her now bare legs. She felt ridiculously self conscious, sitting half naked as he looked her over. She was thankful he wasn't leering, or creepy.

She looked at her thighs, not sure what she'd find, and gasped as the blue and purple bruises jumped out at her. Under Daryl's glow they stood out in stark contrast to her pale legs.

"I was disappointed in myself" Daryl spoke as she poked and prodded at her legs. They didn't hurt, not even a little. "Ya can't feel nothin' cause'a my blood, but I did that. Jesus Evie, I could'a killed ya" his voice was sad, sorry. Evie stopped poking and looked up at him. He didn't meet her eyes, was transfixed by her legs.

She didn't expect herself to launch her body at him, she didn't know she was going to throw her arms around his neck and squeeze him as tight as she could.

"You didn't" she whispered directly into his ear, her hand finding the back of his head "you didn't, Daryl"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry I've not posted for ages! I've been so busy. I hope this chapter was worth at least some of the wait.   
> Thanks for reading x


	36. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning of minor character death. I hope no one gets too upset.

Daryl closed his eyes at the sound of her voice, her breath tickling his ear. His arms snaked around her and hugged her tightly, but flashes of the bruising he'd left on her neck and thighs assaulted him, and he pushed her away. Holding her at arm's length he looked at her very seriously.

"Don't matter" he whispered "I could'a." Her face fell, her bright eyes dulled and her smile dropped completely from her face. He shook his head gently, wanting to sate the disheartened feeling he was getting from her. He cupped her face gently.

"Maybe we wait for the bruises to go down." He dropped a hand from her face and used the other to move her head gently up and to one side. Fat purple and blue fingerprints circled her delicate neck. His fingerprints. It made him so angry at himself. Evie pulled her head from his hand.

"Will you lie down with me?" She asked quietly. Her skin went a little pink and she smiled embarrassed. "I just, I wanna be held." She said by way of explanation. Daryl understood, he'd felt the same a hundred times but never had the balls to own up to it. It was another thing to add to the long list of reasons he admired Evie so much.

* * *

 

Evie felt stupid. She'd never asked a guy to just hold her in her whole life, but she needed it, and Daryl wasn't willing to make her feel present in any other way. He gave her his half smile. It wasn't mocking, so that was something.

She still felt a great deal of sorrow, even if he had explained his feelings of regret away, showing her the bruises he'd made. They might never share the experience again, and the realisation left her feeling empty. She was still sitting in just her drawers and a tshirt, but she was no longer worried about her almost nakedness. She just wanted to feel like she was there, still alive, still breathing. As pathetic as that would have felt in the time before, now with the world falling apart around them, it felt like all that mattered.

She took his hand and led him back to where he had lay on his own, dipping briefly to grab her jeans on the way.

She wasn't going to put them on, but the straw was scratchy and rough so she did. Daryl watched her dressing, making her giggle.

"Never known a man want to watch me get dressed" she said with a smile. Daryl mumbled something ridiculous, which had her giggling even more under her breath.

"I like watchin' everythin' you do."

* * *

 

In the morning Evie woke how she always did, fitfully, wanting to stave off the morning as long as she could. She screwed her eyes closed and groaned as the relentless light penetrated anyway. Daryl's arm lay heavy on her waist, and as she turned onto her back in the hope that might make the sun go away, it rolled onto her bare stomach. Her shirt had ridden up in her sleep. It was warm, hot even, to have his hand there. She marvelled at his heat as she slowly opened her eyes.

"You run so warm" she croaked, her throat dry from their night's bed of straw. She remembered Aaron, and lay listening to his breathing as she watched dust try and settle from her movement. It swirled in the air despite the lack of breeze. A small white feather appeared and she watched it with interest, thinking about Angels and Freya. It was a wonderful and quiet calm. She thought she could have happily lay there for hours.  
When the hoof steps came, tentative and hesitant, she finally sat up.

"Buttons" she whispered, though Daryl would have already known, smelling and hearing him long before Evie would have. He put a finger to his lips, and slowly, quietly got up and crept to the stall door, gently pushing the top gate open slightly.

There was a little huff of air as Buttons noticed, and startled, but he didn't run, not this time. Evie grew tentatively hopeful, but Daryl turned to her looking distraught. Then she felt it, the mass ball of weight that lay on Daryl's chest. She raised an eyebrow as Daryl shook his head dejectedly.

"He's lame" he said very carefully and quietly. "'S'been bit." Evie stood suddenly and waded through the straw carpet to the gate, Daryl tried to catch her around the waist as she ran forward, but his hands slipped as she evaded him with a scowl.

"No!" she managed breathlessly, grabbing the door frame and peeking around it.

Buttons stood with his left rear hoof held up, and he tossed his head when he saw Evie. His eye rove around in its socket, and despondency gripped Evie in cold vicelike hands. He was in pain, and though she knew the virus that brought humans back to some semblance of life wouldn't get him, if he didn't get wrapped up an infection definitely would. She shook her head and looked at Daryl behind her.

"He needs a vet" she said in a rush "antibiotics." Daryl just looked at her sadly, not moving, not speaking. She knew he was feeling her hopelessness, and the fact he wasn't trying to calm her, sate her, or assure her just made her feel worse. She shook her head, disbelieving, "no" she said again, "Daryl we have to help him" she put a hand on her chest wanting to hold herself together "please... "

* * *

 

Daryl had nothing to say, there was only one thing he could think to do and that was a shot to the brain. He could hear Aaron stirring, that was a turn up, but Evie's sense of loss was so strong he didn't really care. She had a lot riding on the survival of that horse, including some ridiculous idea that it was a metaphor for their relationship.

"Evie" he said gently, and she was already shaking her head at him, hot angry tears on her cheeks.

"Hey" Aaron was up. "Woah, what's happening?" Great, that was all he needed. He took a deep steadying breath.

"Evie" he said a little stronger than before "even if we had a vet we'd need ta get him back safely. It ain't possible. The best thing, the kindest and most humane thing" he paused and she seemed to crumble in front of him, falling to her knees dejected. Aaron had got up and gone to the stable door. He peeked through, and let out a sad 'oh'. He'd missed everything, hadn't learned how much the horse meant to Evie, but catching it had meant a lot to him, too.

"I don't suppose there's a vet?" Evie asked, and Aaron slowly shook his head.

"No. Nothing like that."

"You tried" Daryl said, making them both jump as if they forgot he was there "ain't that half the battle? We'll get horses, we'll get everythin' we need, jus' maybe not today." Aaron took a moment before nodding firmly

"You're right, of course you're right. What do we do now? We can't leave him like that."

* * *

 

Evie and Aaron huddled at the far corner of the stable block, quietly forlorn and trying not to listen.

Wimps, Evie thought, both of us. She didn't want to cry. She'd not meant to put so much faith for everything into a horse, a feral and skittish one at that, but she had. She buried her head in Aaron's chest and he held her gently, as Daryl crept forward, now with his crossbow at his eye. She knew it was the best for buttons, and she'd have happily taken the same fate if the tables were turned and she was bitten, but she couldn't watch, and she couldn't listen. She felt Daryl's sense of sadness, but it was minor in comparison to hers. She had a feeling he felt worse for her than for the horse, and that just made her sad.

If Buttons was a symbol, their lives were about to take a dark and terrible turn.

She waited for the metallic ping of Daryl letting a bolt go, her one request that it wasn't a bullet. Hearing the gun would have finished her. She didn't hear Buttons take a fall, but Daryl darted out and was gone a long minute.

On returning he didn't look as broken as she expected,

"C'mon" He said roughly, his voice tight "we should go."

As they left they passed a large shapeless lump on the floor, covered by old and worn out blankets. Daryl's hand found the small of Evie's back as she slowed, and he guided her carefully past the pile of fabric.

"He came to ya for help" he breathed, "he came to find ya, n we gave him the gift a freedom."

"He could have had a good life with us" Evie remarked sadly, and Daryl's hand firmed up on her back as he himself stiffened.

"Ya can't tame the wild." To Evie's ears his voice was hard, like his word would be the final one on the matter "He was beautiful n free, how he should always a'been. Now, he always will be."

* * *

 

Aaron didn't ask how he came to be in the stable. He didn't remark at Evie's lack of symptoms, or the fact she was still alive. He didn't question that he was asleep for almost 24 hours, or ask about the people they thought they could help, who turned out to be monsters of a different kind.

Whether he thought about it, Evie couldn't tell. He spoke little, which seemed unusual, but they barely knew him to judge on that score.   
She chewed on her lower lip as they walked quietly through long grasses, Daryl's comments about Buttons also weighing heavy on her mind. The horse was free, as he should have always been.  
Was he really talking about the horse?

She didn't have time to ponder. Daryl had suddenly hunkered down low, and without thinking she and Aaron followed. Suddenly on high alert, the conversations from the stable left her head altogether. She had her knife in her hand, simply on instinct. She couldn't remember pulling it from its sheath.

Daryl looked back at her and Aaron, a warning look, be quiet, be still. They waited what felt like an age and eventually a man appeared before them, some way in the distance.

A bright contrast to a muggy grey sky in a red poncho he waded the tall grass slowly, rubbing wild leeks on his bare skin.

Evie frowned.

Aaron wondered aloud what the man was doing, and Daryl told him, Mozzies don't like the leek.   
But Evie was still frowning. She hadn't had any of Daryl's blood for a while, but she still felt a dark foreboding. She was contemplating that for a while when Daryl whistled at her, and she realised she was still crouching where Daryl and Aaron had got up to follow the man. Daryl questioned her with his eyes, no doubt feeling something from her, but she shook her head at him. He would know better than she if there was a problem, he would guide them out of danger if he could.

So she trusted his instinct.

* * *

 

Daryl was getting assaulted on both sides with feelings that were not his own. He had been given no clue that he would feel Aaron's emotions after the adjustment, and if he had he may have chosen another path instead.

Confusion, mounting hesitation, fear and sadness all tinged with Aaron's personal scent. He was glad he could tell the feelings from each of his comrades apart, but he was happiest just feeling himself and Evie.

God damn Merle and his lacklustre teaching style.

" _Don' blame me, baby brother, I was as in the dark as you. My sire got hisself stabbed on a bender n bled out in the street"_   
Daryl remembered, Merle had told him how he felt every ounce of the man's pain, an effect brought on by the vampirism to ensure foundlings would save their elders.

He hated that word, foundling. It made him sound like a damn orphan.

Still, it was that evolutionary adaptation that had brought Merle to him, too, when LouAnn lay bleeding in the truck. Another rule. Makers were to look after their foundlings.

Foundling

He really did despise that word.

They were fast losing the man in the poncho, now a speck in the distance though still standing out against the grey and green world around him. A slash of colour, an assault on the landscape.

Daryl didn't want to get too close too soon, though, for fear of scaring the man away. They'd been too hasty with the first group they found, and now they'd lost Buttons, morale was diminishing fast. He wanted to ensure it was safe before hopes raised too high. He wasn't in the headspace to feel so many lows from all angles at once again yet. He was pretty sure Evie and Aaron wouldn't cope either.

Buttons had stared him square in the eye before he died. Stood there, shiny and black and beautiful, but with a quiver running all through his muscles he didn't seem to be able to control, and even planted all four feet on the ground. He glared at Daryl with still, shiny, black eyes, for the first time they didn't roll around in his head in panic. It knew, he was sure, the damned horse really had come looking for help. Probably looking for Evie.

It didn't make a noise, just gracefully collapsed onto one side into the hay Evie had brought in the night before. Maybe even that was on purpose.

He sighed heavily and tried to clear the images from his mind, what use that would do.   
He was thankful for the distraction a sudden scent in the air gave him.

Charred earth.

It was long gone, a long dead fire. Hours easily, maybe more. Either way... He turned sharply left to follow the smell, lead by his nose into the trees that seemed to relentlessly follow them wherever they walked.

"Daryl?" Evie's voice was quiet, tentative, as though she was stepping on eggshells, lost in his own mind it was a far away sound.

He stopped in front of a patch of burnt ground. Blackened, now cold, though he picked up the scents that were here. Soup. A man whose personal perfume was strong coffee on a winter morning. Another, maybe more than one, whose scent was spoiled milk. He had to try and tune it out because it made him want to puke. Good and bad mixed all around him and it almost defeated him. Bad guys were not as few and far between as one would hope. Just miles from where Evie... Where she....

He couldn't think it.

" _Where she almos' died, bro."_

And here was more foul example of human kind's demise.

It made him uneasy.

He turned instead to thinking about just going back to Alexandria empty handed, taking a break, respite. God knows they needed it, from Rick right down to Judith.

Pause, breathe, continue.

"Daryl!?" More urgent now, a voice that wouldn't take kindly to being ignored.

He turned to Aaron and Evie, now both in his left. Both inexplicably still, looking at the burnt out patch on the ground.

"What does it mean?" She asked him "are we being followed?" Daryl shook his head. He didn't think so, this reeked of happenstance, there was nothing pre planned here.

"We'll go a little more, if we don't see somethin' soon we'll head back" Daryl looked at Aaron for confirmation, and Aaron nodded his agreement.

"Yeah, I agree. Things are getting decidedly odd out here" he hitched his gun on his shoulder and frowned, but Daryl moved them forward before Aaron could ask questions. Daryl was in no mood to explain Aaron's blank spots. Even with them he was right.

The world was just getting stranger and stranger.


	37. Chapter 37

"Did the walker do that?" Aaron asked Evie as they made their way back to the open fields of long grass. His voice seemed too loud in the quiet stillness all around them. Too still, Evie thought, far too still. She hesitated only a moment before answering, and she saw Daryl's back stiffen considerably in front of them.

"What's that?" She asked, stalling. She knew he meant the marks around her neck, the ones Daryl had been so worried about. She couldn't even feel them.

"your neck" Evie shook her head.

"No. When we killed the walker the people went mad, the woman with a gun on you grabbed me. You don't remember?" She watched as Daryl scratched his eyebrow, frustrated. He didn't want this conversation to be happening. Aaron shook his head.

"No. Shock I guess." He concluded, thoughtfully. They walked on in silence, Aaron's face was a picture of confusion and deep thought, like he was trying so hard to remember.

"Ya ever do this the other way 'round?" Evie watched as Daryl turned to Aaron, letting him catch up. She listened vaguely as she took up the rear by herself.

"What do you mean?"

"Ever have to kick anyone out?" Aaron took a deep breath and Evie turned a slow 360 to keep her eyes all around them.

"We made a mistake once." He shook his head and looked quite disgusted at himself "I can't let that happen again." Evie thought that was good, a nice bit of armour for them to have. He was careful, he didn't just bring in anyone, he thought the family were a good group to have on side.

It wasn't much, One man's idea of what was right, but it was something. Aaron didn't cower from Daryl like the rest did, though. He didn't watch him with suspicious eyes and stiff body language.

Still. It was something.

They'd lost the guy in the red poncho. Daryl appeared pretty pissed about that. Evie could feel him thinking he'd failed, the stink of it rolling off him and making her anxious, but she didn't believe that, she couldn't. They'd tried, and maybe it was time to head back, now. Rest up and try again another time.

They spotted the chain link fence in the distance together, and Aaron called it, Daryl and Evie already hunkered down low to minimise the risk of being seen by any potential watch.

"Sometimes we lose people" Aaron said carefully, now very quiet. "But this, this could be something." They crept up slowly, Daryl noted it was full of goods trucks which may still be full of cans.

"Might go down better than more new people" Evie mused, but it felt... Too easy. There were no walkers in the warehouse yard, no damage to the fences. Strings of cans rustled and clanged gently in the evening breeze, sending a cold shiver through her.  
But Daryl agreed, she watched him sniff the air, though he tried to do it inconspicuously, and grimace at whatever scent he caught, but he agreed anyway. She wondered what he was trying to prove, but it couldn't be so bad if he led them straight into it, surely.

* * *

Rotten milk. That was what Daryl could smell, and his stomach churned at the fragrance, but he couldn't say no. If it was that bad he would sort it, he'd have to. But he wanted things to go as expected for Aaron right now, he was already suspicious, even if he didn't know why. Daryl couldn't have that, not now. Alexandria was what his family needed. Respite, breathing space, and he couldn't get them kicked out because he was a freak. He couldn't be the one to make that happen.

So he smelled the sour milk smell of the air and planned a way in anyway, despite the heavily loaded looks from Evie. Part of him also wanted to chase after the poncho man, and if this went to shit it would be on Aaron's head anyway.

The feeling he got from Evie was complete dread. Her light, her glow, had paled, and her eyes were large and worried. He turned to her, very carefully, and whispered.

"Hey, ya wanna sit this one out we'll understand" but she scowled at him and shook her head. She didn't read between the lines like he expected.

"You wanna do this, we do it together." And in spite of himself, or maybe because of it, he nodded, once, and between them they got the gate open, and walked into Hell.

The smell got worse. The putrid foulness of off milk mixed with the sour sweet smell of rotting flesh, and instantly he knew what was in the trucks. He knew. Evie all but vibrated beside him with nerves, picking up on his feelings, while Aaron darted forward excitedly to pull a licence plate off a trailer. He shoved it in his bag as Daryl studied the shutters. He shoved Evie back a little, and she whimpered as he reached for a latch, sending the tin cans on strings around them into a frenzy.

"Here" he said to Aaron, and turned to Evie now behind him. "I give ya the nod n ya run, y'hear?" He whispered. She nodded almost as imperceptibly as he often did. But it weren't enough for him. He turned to her and spoke with more assertiveness.

"Go now, Evie. Get outta the gate. Now" she looked at him with big deer in headlights eyes, but she snapped to suddenly and jumped from the platform and headed for the gate.

* * *

 

She was cold to the core with fear. Daryl knew it was a bad situation but he jumped right into it because he always had to prove a point.

She reached the link fence and the steel was ice beneath her fingers, she could barely keep hold of it, and opted to wrap her sleeves around her hands.

She shut the gate. She knew she would regret it, but she shut it anyway, saving herself because she was a coward. Even though Daryl had told her to go, it felt wrong and yellow, and despite knowing she was gutless, her guts were churning. She'd chickened out once already on the trip. She huffed a frustrated sigh, peering through the chain link with narrow eyes, unable to see much in the dark. Even Daryl's glow was barely visible behind the trucks.  
Her heart pounded slowly in her chest.

Thud.

"They're all locked up" she heard Daryl's voice.

Thud.

"Here" Aaron. She still couldn't see.

Thud.

The shutters rattled up and suddenly her slow thudding heart was thundering along like a herd of galloping horses. Her breath felt snatched away from her as she watched, almost helpless.  
Walkers descended upon Daryl and Aaron suddenly, and she could feel Daryl's surprise.

"Shit" she hissed, as walkers blocked her view. "Shit, shit, shit"

* * *

 

"Holy shit!" Daryl grabbed Aaron and dragged him out of the way, launching them both from the loading platform in a single leap as Walkers reached and lurched for them from the back of the trucks, which had all opened at once. They musta been linked, Daryl's mind told him. Musta been, how'd I miss that?

"Evie! Ya stay put!" he could feel her fear, her confusion, fight or flight pulling levers and switching switches in her head. Hear her heart thudding even as walkers seemed to crowd them.

He got separated from Aaron, and found himself between trucks, grabbing what he could find to ward off the dead. He shuffled back and hit the heavy industrial sized rusty chain with his foot, without thinking he grabbed it and swung it at the walkers whose attention he'd somehow grabbed.

 _Don't do anythin' stupid_ He thought in Evie's direction, and suddenly he found Aaron again, and they stood back to back wondering what the fuck they were going to do. Then he saw it. He had seen it before but it was just scenery.

"The car!" He yelled over the deafening noise of the dead. "Reckon ya can make it?"

* * *

 Evie jumped back from the fence as a walker slammed into it and reached its rotting fingers for her. She grimaced, only seconds before her cold hands, frozen fingers, were wrapped around the mesh. She cried out, she'd lost Aaron and Daryl and she didn't know what to do.

Frustrated, angry, she pulled her knife and stabbed the walker at the fence through the eye. It froze, stock still, for a good five seconds before sliding down the fence. She had time to register the W etched onto its forehead. She stabbed another which was drawn by her movement, and thought perhaps she could do this, one by one, draw them to the fence and take them out. She was crying, she was yelling, and she hoped Daryl wasn't feeling what she was feeling, she felt numb, and bitter and cowardly.

She stabbed another walker, through the forehead this time, how many was that? How many left?

"Excuse me." Her heart skidded to a sudden halt at the low southern drawl, and she turned with her knife up. A man stood behind her with a large stick in his hands and a small pack on his back. "Can I help you?" She wasn't in the habit of just trusting anyone, but the guy didn't make her feel nervous, in fact he exuded calm.

It didn't stop her being wary.

"Why?" She asked him, eyes narrow, knife still up. He raised his hands in a gesture of calm and peace, but she wouldn't be so easily sated.

"Because you're screaming ya mouth off out here on ya own and ya gonna draw more of the dead. What's happened? Can I help you?" Evie eyed him suspiciously. She wished she'd had some of Daryl's blood so she could scent the guy out, but all she had was her instinct, and her instinct was to throw him to the walkers and save Daryl.

God not even Aaron, just Daryl. She was disgusted at herself.

"My friends" she said eventually, they were in there, and the walkers got out, and now I can't see them." Her voice got more panicked with every word, the last more of a gulp and a sob than proper English.

"Ok, ok I see. Let's see if we can't find 'em then." The man was kind, she could feel it now. It rolled off him and you didn't have to be superhuman to know. She gave him a nod, and he told her what was going to go down.

* * *

"Coffee" Daryl said, almost to himself. Aaron gave him a look and Daryl shook his head. They were trapped. Daryl knew he could get out but... Returning with a body, or just with _out_ Aaron, was not an option for his family right then.

"I'll go" Daryl said. "Ain't no one gonna miss me. I'll draw em off n ya c'n get out" Aaron was stunned, touched, and offended. Daryl felt it all in a rush but he didn't need to, every feeling was written on the man's face.

"No. You have family, you have Evie. If we go, we go together" Daryl nodded, not correcting that Evie wasn't his to have.

"A'ight. Let me finish my cigarette first." He took a drag, filling his senses with the acrid smoke, still smelling coffee and wondering what that was about. A good smell in a bad place. It didn't sit right. It didn't sit right at all.

With the cigarette down to the filter he gave Aaron a nod

"K?" He asked, and Aaron nodded back.

"Yeah, I'm ready." He didn't sound ready, but he felt ready at least. Daryl counted them down, and they threw open the doors. Daryl saw Evie's face and rushed her, noticing instantly the warehouse yard was half as full as it had been. He grabbed Evie and looked her over, quick enough she barely noticed the inspection.

"Let's go!" She yelled, grabbing his hand and running to the gate, which they made it through, just, all four intact.Coffee was there, too. A man who smelled like coffee couldn't be bad, and Daryl thanked him.

"Thank you" he said graciously, and suddenly realised Evie still had his hand, he squeezed it, asking her if she was ok, as Aaron told the new guy about Alexandria. It was the least they could do.

"I'm ok" Evie muttered, sounding a little watery.

"Ya frozen." Daryl noted, and she managed a shrug, dropping his hand and pulling her sleeves over her fingers.

"You watch what I just did, you would be too."

"Oh" he'd introduced himself as Morgan, "that's very kind but I'm just on my way somewhere else, I wonder if you could help me." He pulled out a map and Daryl took it.

"Ya gonna wanna come with us" Daryl said. He showed the map to Evie, and she saw Abraham's print in the Atlantic Ocean.

"I am?" Morgan asked, as the map got passed to Aaron. Evie nodded.

"Yeah, I think we might have what you're looking for." She wondered how long Morgan had been following them, and knew from his face that Daryl was too.

"We were just about to head home. Think maybe we should take a short break though" Aaron was saying, his voice wobbling "I don't think I can trust my legs to hold me up too much longer"

***

They made camp a few miles away, not wanting to be in too close proximity to anyone who could set such a trap. Evie and Daryl sat awake, listening to the wind in the trees. They'd decided a fire was too risky, too obvious, and Morgan and Aaron had been asleep in minutes anyway.

A shiver wracked Evie's body, Daryl went to take her hand, maybe. She wasn't sure what his hand was doing, but as it moved, raised up to touch, caress, hold, or just linger, she shook her head at him.

"Please don't" She whispered, and without a word he dropped his hand back to his own thigh. Sure, it would be warm, but she really didn't want him raising false hopes in her that they could be anything more than good friends. One day, when she didn't feel her heart rate race when they sat so close, then maybe they could touch. Maybe.

"You knew what it was." She said softly, meaning to accuse but not managing too. "And you went in anyway" Daryl stayed quiet for a long moment, before finally nodding his head and shrugging his shoulders.

"I had to see." Evie turned to him, the ground beneath her butt crunching as she did so.

"You didn't. You could have said you didn't want to see it. Why did you send me away?" Daryl shrugged again, making an odd noise in the back of his throat. Evie looked at him a long moment as if he might say something else, but nothing came. She folded her hands across her knees and stared into the middle distance. Not seeing, or trying not to. Trying not to think but wanting the awkward subject changed.

"All 'ad dub'yas" Daryl whispered, miming writing a W on his own forehead. Evie nodded, humming her agreement.

"Like the walker you told me about in the woods, outside Alexandria." Daryl shuffled his feet uncomfortably.

"Those trucks were lined with mattresses. Someone din't want those things to hear, or be heard." Evie lay her head on her folded arms and looked beside her at Daryl. "Those cans on strings outside, like Pavlov's dogs" Evie narrowed her eyes and Daryl explained "The walkers learn to ignore it. The noise means nothin'."

"You think it was laid for any reason?" She chewed her lip. "Aaron lost his bag his the scuffle"

"That's a lotta walkers, a huge risk to take, just to keep people out." Daryl said thoughtfully "maybe they're tryin' a draw people in." Evie frowned in the darkness.

"In to what?" But Daryl shrugged. She could see his mind working, feel it in the very bones of her, but he didn't reply, nothing but the throw away movement of his shoulders. Nothing but a glare into the distance with his narrow dark blue eyes, thoughtful. Evie could feel him bristling, something had got his back up, but he was working very hard to keep it to himself, going as far as to shield himself.

She didn't know how she knew, but everything coming from his was fuzzy around the edges, incomplete.

She did think to question him, was going to, in fact, when he turned to her.

"We're 50 miles from home. Lotta walkin' to do tomorra, ya best get some sleep." There was a feeling of shut down from him, and rather than wind him up further she said goodnight and slinked away from him.

The heavy weight on her chest was her own. She lay down feeling cold and vulnerable without being able to feel him, and she wondered why he'd shut her out, if he even knew he was doing it. The questions would have to wait until morning. She fell asleep almost as soon as she closed her eyes.


	38. Chapter 38

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, the next couple of chapters, will deal with something that some might be uncomfortable with. Periods/menstruation.
> 
> I've never understood why the Vamp! Genre in general doesn't deal with this as a rule. Er, HI Yeah, Vamps are gonna be all over that. I also hate how it's a bit of a taboo for some people. Girls who were assigned female organs at birth are gonna have them, people!  
> Also... Period sex is uhm super hot. 
> 
> Yeah.

The morning dawned grey and cool. Before even the birds began chirping, Daryl sat still and quiet, watching the small group wake up around him. Evie, who seemed to struggle so hard with waking up, screwing her face up, fidgeting, and huffing. Morgan awoke slowly, still lying down when he opened his eyes. Aaron opening his eyes and sitting bolt upright. It was interesting, how they were all different, but all woke up with the sun, at roughly the same time.

Evie's eyes flickered slowly open and Daryl turned his face away, not wanting to be caught watching her wake up. The grey dawn light was growing brighter, and he knew they had a lot of ground to cover. An awful lot. Alone with Evie it would have taken no time at all, but with four of them, it could take two days. He sighed quietly, two days of having to avoid the scent Evie was giving off, pouring from her skin, her pores. 

He knew he'd cut his emotions from her the previous night, was sure she knew too, even though she didn't know why. How could he tell her that? No one in their right mind would... He cut the thought off. She'd find out, soon enough. His issue now was that while shielding his own mind, he'd not be able to feel her.

He made a mental note to check in regularly. 

Morgan was sitting up, his stick across his lap, looking stuck in the midst of sleep. He eyed Daryl carefully.

"Did you sleep at all?" He asked suspiciously, and Daryl just shrugged. He may have been in the right place at the right time the previous night, but Daryl could have handled it. He owed this man nothing. 

"Don't worry 'bout me. We gotta move, soon." Morgan nodded thoughtfully.

"How far?" Daryl shrugged as if he didn't know, as if he had no idea that it was exactly 52.72 miles. 

"50 miles" Aaron said, running his fingers through his hair. Morgan nodded again.

"That's two days on foot" he said, getting up swiftly, effortlessly. "We should maybe try and find a vehicle, even for half the journey." Daryl scowled thoughtfully, watching Evie stretch from the corner of his eye. She looked lithe, lean, as she raised her hands high above her head and pushed out her chest, her tee, with the big rip already making it short, riding up a little and exposing her flat torso. A quiver ran through Daryl and he had to switch off, tune out from her. 

"That means taking the road" she said cautiously. "I don't know if I'm comfortable with that, out here we can hide." Daryl frowned deeper. What was she so scared of? He looked her way again, red hair gleaming even in the low level light, she was fussing in her pack, and pulled out a clean tee. 

Daryl looked away as she grabbed her ripped tshirt's hem. He was having a hard time with her already, and the worst hadn't even started. He was thankful it would likely soon be over. He sighed and scrubbed at his face with his hands. It never bothered him with other girls, before, it never attacked his senses within the group, living in close quarters on the run for 9 months after the farm, it never got to him like this. Evie was different. 

Evie was glaring at him.

* * *

"What do you think?" She asked again, reorganising her clean tshirt around the collar. Daryl was being a little off. She couldn't put her finger on it, but she definitely felt like he'd drawn a thick curtain across his mind, she could barely feel him. A bottle of water appeared under her nose and she took it with a soft  "Thanks" as Daryl frowned and rubbed his forehead with his thumb. 

"I dunno. It's an idea. Maybe we keep it in mind." He stretched his neck and looked at the sky. "Maybe we stay on foot a while. See what we see."

"We could find something" Aaron piped up. Evie frowned a little, hadn't they already? Morgan was quite the find. 

Still, they needed to get moving. Anything to keep her mind off why Daryl was being closed would be welcome. Wearing herself out thinking about it was no use. She watched him as she screwed the lid back on the water bottle, handing it back to Aaron. He was contemplative, planning, she had nothing to worry about. At least not in that moment as he constructed their backward journey in his head. His glow was still present, above the grime that sweat had left on his skin, in his hair, he shone, an ever present light in the dark world. 

She smirked at herself, stupid, she thought. Ever present pain in the ass, more like. She covered her mouth before a giggle could escape her, and hid in her hair from the others' eyes. They'd had a tough few days, if they caught her laughing now they'd think she was mad. 

Daryl had a small smile on his face too. A tight lipped smirk as though he was trying to keep something back. Had he felt her humour? She pursed her lips at him and he caught her eye, the smile dropping instantly from his face. Like he was caught peeking. She chewed her lip, definitely an ever present pain in the ass.

She stood and stretched again, a yawn chased by a shiver taking over her as she felt the cold and damp around her. A funny little noise escaped her at the top end of her stretch, and though Aaron and Morgan took no notice, Daryl's eyes flicked over her, and she was sure she felt something from him. 

It was gone before she got a handle on it. 

The group shared a small rationed breakfast, cold due to not starting a fire, but still with enough energy to keep them going, before setting off. 

***

"I came across some men, well, to be honest, they came across me, night before last." They'd walked an hour in silence, making slow progress in the grass and undergrowth. Morgan had looked like he wanted to speak several times before he actually did. "They had W's carved in their heads like those walkers you found." He concluded softly. 

"Bad people?" Evie asked him, and Morgan nodded. 

"Yeah, they were bad. Said they were free, and were _freeing_ the people they killed. They wanted to _free_ me but I wouldn't let them." He gripped his stick a little tighter, Evie noticed, as if he was angry. She went to ask if he had killed them, but a pain gripped her belly in a tight fist and whisked the words away. 

"Y'ok?" Daryl had turned to her so sharply she almost walked right into him. She nodded as the pain subsided, eyeing him carefully, trying to feel him, getting nothing. She was sure she'd felt a glimmer of something as they almost crashed together.

"Fine" she answered him "not sure that cold soggy pasta is agreeing with me"

"That pasta was not soggy" Aaron said behind her, "I'll have you know it was cooked perfectly al dente until it was left overnight" Evie rolled her eyes with a smile, but didn't reply. 

* * *

It was happening. Daryl felt it as Evie drew in a sharp, soft breath, she hadn't realised he had heard it. Hell, no one else would have noticed. But he was tuned in. 

They were very slowly chewing up miles, about 3 an hour, which was awful. At that rate they'd be out there for 17 hours if they walked without rest stops. But being in a car, as great an idea as that was, would mean close quarters with Evie. He couldn't, his trust in himself diminished the minute he saw the bruises he'd made on her pale flesh, the very moment he'd let her down from the tree he'd thrown her against, cracking her head against the bark like he didn't care. The Stables were different, she wasn't expecting anything, just wanted company while she slept, and that was fair enough.

Now, with her scent stronger than he'd ever experienced, so much so he could almost taste it, he didn't think he could just hold her as she slept, he certainly wouldn't be able to thrust her against a tree without breaking it, and her, in half.

The worst was that she was completely oblivious to what was happening, both inside herself and in him beside her.  

He felt pathetic. What was happening was completely and unutterably natural, and sure, it hadn't happened for some time, the girl had been half starved when they met. Didn't stress, emotion and nutrition all play a part? He was sure they did, though he wasn't exactly an expert.

Merle laughed heartily in his head, and Daryl had to clamp his mouth tightly shut to keep from emitting a low growl. 

_Back off Merle, Y'ain't no damn help even when ya were here._ He thought, 

_Me? No one helped me, ain't no one help li'l Ol' Merle none, but Merle knows things, now. See, ya got two choices. Ya c'n close off, or ya c'n go. Heh, n I know Y'aint gonna leave 'er._ Merle was right, and Daryl huffed a sigh. He weren't going anywhere. Ever. Not without Evie, not now. He couldn't, it pained him to even consider it. 

He'd have to put up with it. Maybe he could just not breathe, not stand downwind.

He huffed a frustrated sigh and rubbed at the back of his neck. She was suspicious as it was. This wasn't going to go down well.  
But what else could he possibly do? Tell her to stay away herself, explain in no uncertain terms that the scent of her bleeding was driving him to distraction? He knew that would go down like a tonne of shit. This was his problem, not hers.

He swept his eyes over the group, striding along in front of him. On top of everything they were stuck in the wilderness, two days from home.

He had a decision to make, and every option could could cost more than he was willing to give.

* * *

"Let's try it out on the road" Daryl said darkly. Evie whipped her head around to him. She least expected this so early, but she was thankful it was at least still light. The dark hid all sorts of horrors in its black shadows, and her confidence was splintered into shards after the first group they came across on this trip.

The people who shut her in with a walker they thought they could save.

Daryl had narrowed his eyes at her, an unspoken question written All over his face.

"We'll be OK." He said to her. He reached out as if to take her arm, but faltered and turned away from her instead.

Evie ran her eyes over the wings on the back of his vest, wondering what had happened to the Angel Freya had sent her. The one who bent all the rules for her, the one who told her he loved her.

Maybe he'd be back. When whatever demons were toying with his mind grew tired, he be back.

"We're making such slow progress" Daryl added, as if to explain his decision. "Morgan's right, maybe we find a car," he shrugged with one shoulder, tucking his thumb in the strap of his crossbow. "Never know 'less ya try." He had a point, didn't he always? Morgan nodded, and they turned away from the protection of the trees. Evie took a deep breath before following, worried but still trusting, her instincts telling her that Daryl was simply protecting her.

In her mind, Freya was nodding vigorously.

***

The roads were empty, dusty, dry, and steep.

But most essentially, empty.

Evie gripped her knife in one hand tightly, fisted the strap of her pack in the other. Her eyes darted restlessly back to the trees. It was too quiet, and she couldn't shake the feeling of eyes on them. She looked over her shoulder again, and Aaron caught he eye.

"Are you ok? You seem so nervous. It's unlike you" Evie frowned a little

"You don't know me"

"I know well enough to know you're not easily scared." A little knot tightened in Evie's gut and she rubbed her stomach absently.

"What did you put in that pasta?" She asked, keen to change the subject. She couldn't explain why she was so nervous, she hadn't felt that way since before she and Daryl found each other. When she was last alone. She chewed her lip and looked at Daryl's back before her.

"There was nothing wrong with my pasta" Aaron replied with an air of bitterness she dismissed. No. Perhaps there wasn't.

She started to wonder if her sudden paranoia and Daryl's emotional absence were connected. If the knot in her stomach had something to do with his influence.

She was about to jog up the little hill they were climbing to catch up with him, approach him and ask him some questions, but he stopped walking, Morgan beside him stopped too, at the crest of the road. Aaron darted forward to see what they could see, and just before Evie reached them she felt a little tug of something from Daryl.

Hope, intrigue and caution all rolled as one, enveloped in a hint of the scent of Fall.

Then it was gone, like a light had switched off. It was so fleeting she wondered if she had felt if at all.

"We should check it out" Daryl said quietly as Evie lay her eyes on a few small brick buildings and a couple of abandoned cars. Morgan gave a little nod and was putting one foot in front of the other before anyone could say any more.

* * *

BE GONE

The words were scratched into the paintwork on the door of the first building. Big fat letters, curving downward as though written in a rush. He reached out his hand and touched the letters lightly with the pads of his fingers. They were cold. Old. Nothing came from them at all, and whoever wrote them would be long gone.

Or not.

He tried to scent the air, daring to breathe for the first time in ten minutes, but only got a nose-full of cooling summer rain, sizzling droplets on pavement, refreshing and thirst quenching.

"What do you feel?" Evie was next to him, he should have never let his guard down. What did he feel? _There_ was a loaded question. He felt like ripping her from behind him and crashing her into the door, he felt like he wanted to rip open her torso and expose her blood lined uterus, before eating it in a frenzy. He felt hungry, and horny and murderous. He felt that if he never scented her like this again it would be too soon. He felt his erection threatening against his fly, he felt ashamed.

_Chocolate locks and blood red lips._

_It was like the scene from Carrie, the scene from the Shining, blood... everywhere_

"It's old." he said, turning his face away from her, hiding his teeth which slid unbidden from his jaw. "Whoever wrote this shit ain't here." He cleared his throat and looked around him as Aaron and Morgan also returned from a general check of the area.

"Similar things are written on the other doors" Morgan mused. "Away with you, Find Your Own Space." 

"Next door just says leave" Evie added in a breath of scent so refreshing that Daryl couldn't help but close his eyes to picture it. Big bright flowers and lawns, re-hydrated and energised after a long hot summer. 

He opened his eyes again, looking at Evie. 

"What about the cars?" he asked, bumping Evie with his shoulder "Got one'a those smokes?" Anything to fill his senses with something that wasn't her. Morgan and Aaron shook their heads.

"We didn't get that far. Thought maybe we could check these out first." Daryl took the pack of cigarettes from Evie and popped one in his mouth, offering her the packet. She took one, too and put the rest back in her pack. He nodded at Aaron, who was so keen to please and be well thought of. He was desperate to find something, even though they had Morgan. 

Perhaps he felt guilty after the previous night. It was his idea to stop following the poncho guy. Daryl couldn't be sure, Aaron's emotional tie to him had been begun to break. Daryl was thankful for that, it was a struggle just to cope with Evie and himself right then. 

Daryl banged on the door behind him hard and leaned against it, lighting his cigarette and offering the flame to Evie. He held his breath as she bent forward for it, holding her red curls back with one hand. She looked up at him as the cigarette tip touched the flame, and he had to tear his eyes away. 

* * *

When nothing came back to them from the first building, and the initial hammering Daryl gave the door, Evie knew they would be going in, she ditched her cig, and pulled her knife from her belt. She frowned as it caught, and Daryl noticed. He raised an eyebrow at her and she shook her head.

"Sheath is wearing." She whispered, pulling the knife up high to her ear, taking her place opposite him. Daryl brought his foot up and kicked the door with an almighty whack, and it whipped open crashing into the wall with a shake and a clatter. 

The smell battered her senses before anything else. The rotten flesh smell she thought she would get used to over time, putrid, sweet and liquid. It furred up her throat as she pulled her tshirt up over her nose and mouth.

"Good God," Aaron said, disgusted, behind her, but Daryl seemed unfazed, and walked in to the darkness of the building with his crossbow up to his eye. Morgan pulled a grimace but followed, too, without hesitation. They left Evie to take up the rear. 

She didn't expect to see what she saw as the door pulled closed behind them and Daryl's torch light, which he held in his mouth, to pick out what it did. 

She didn't expect to ever see Daryl in pieces at the sight of a walker. 


	39. Chapter 39

For a split second, one minuscule moment in time shorter than a blink, she was sure it was her.

She almost said her name.

Daryl stood in the centre of what looked like a large dining room, shoulders shaking as he looked straight at the walker strung up to the ceiling.

Long blond hair and dirty blue jeans. Brown boots wading in the air.

Pale arms in short yellow sleeves reaching.

Daryl had let his crossbow drop to his side and he held it without care. For a long moment Evie couldn't force herself to move, the whimpers coming from Daryl were unbearable. He'd let whatever guard he had put in place down, and she was battered with his feelings. A distinct sense of loss, a heavy burden of sadness. They attacked her like blows.

And still his shoulders shook, still the quiet whimpers. His torch fell from his mouth and rolled on the floor, landing in such a way to spotlight the horror before them all.

"It's not" Evie managed before her voice broke. "It's not her" she rushed forward, and put her hand on Daryl's bicep but he shrugged her off, just staring at the dead blond who reached for his flesh, as she tore up his heart.

Both Aaron and Morgan went to move towards the walker, but Evie shot a look and an arm at them over Daryl's shoulder.

"Don't!" Share managed, a cry trapped in her throat. It got so she didn't know if she was hearing Daryl or feeling him, everything was so messed up.

"It's not Beth. It can't be" she said to him quietly, reaching again for him and managing to put a hand on his shoulder. His face was a mass of redness and tears, and she just wanted to hold him, wondered if he'd let her. "We buried her, she didn't turn into that" she managed to wrap her arms around him. "She's safe," she whispered carefully into his ear "and she's warm, it can't be her." Suddenly an anger gripped Evie, and she panicked. Daryl pulled from her embrace almost knocking her on her ass. He grabbed the knife still in Evie's hand and threw it hard at the familiar looking creature hanging from the beam across the ceiling.

The throw was true, and the knife buried itself in the walker's forehead. Instantly the low groans and wavering limbs quieted, and the walker just swung slowly back and forth.

Daryl was breathing hard, he rubbed at his face with sleeve, and sniffed.

"I'm gonna cut her down" he said roughly,

"Daryl." Evie started, but he cut her short.

"I'ma cutter down!" he said more harshly, and she had no choice but to stand back and let him do what he would. He grabbed a nearby chair and stood on it, using his own knife to attack the rope that held the walker up.

"She weren't that weak willed" he said when the walker slumped to the floor with a wet thud. Evie nodded a quiet,

"I know." Coming from her. She turned to Aaron and Morgan behind them, both looking stunned but empathetic. "Thank you" she said to them quietly, Morgan dipped his head, Aaron shook his gently, unsure of what was happening or why. He didn't ask questions, but she guessed at some point she'd have to explain.

Daryl had shut her out again. She couldn't feel a thing from him, and as he handed her back her knife she eyed him carefully.

"Ok?" She asked, and he nodded and shrugged all at once, not replying with words.

Evie huffed a sigh and swiped at her own face, scared tears over spilling her lower lids. She was worn out, stress and emotion overload zapping her energy. Daryl's face was set into a scowl and she didn't know how to move them all on from that insane and surreal moment.

* * *

 

He felt her fear and her panic. When he broke down, when the carefully placed walls of protection were burst open by that damned walker, he was entirely torn.

Seeing a walker that was so familiar, that looked so much like... Her... Scared him more than anything ever had, but as his curtain fell down and he sensed Evie, in all her premenstrual deliciousness, he had gone dizzy. The feelings of hunger, fear, heartbreak and lust were at complete odds and he couldn't move. He could do nothing but watch the walker reach for him and whimper like a puppy.

He knew it wasn't her, they buried her, she was shot in the damned head, but it made him realise, it could be Carol, Rick, Evie.

Anyone he loved. All of them. He was going to be left alone in a world of walking corpses that used to be his family.

That was when he got angry, and wrenched Evie's knife from her to end it. The feelings, the emotion, the tears, all finished with a single throw.

He looked the walker over as everyone stood in awkward silence. He got down on his haunches and carefully unstrapped the creatures belt.

He stood and tossed the knife sheath to Evie, who caught it with a stunned 'oh!'

"Thanks" she said, regaining composure. "Now what? Do you wanna rest or should we keep going?" It was a stupid question.

"We keep goin'" he said, as though it was obvious. "Check each place out one by one n then the cars."

"Looks like a warehouse. Furniture." Morgan said, breaking the silence once and for all. Daryl was grateful for that, grateful for him. He picked up his torch and swung it around. Morgan was right.

"Won't be much for us here" Evie said muffled, her tshirt back over her face now she could take in the awful smell again. Daryl nodded shallowly. He could cope with the smell, didn't have to breathe too often if he didn't want to.

But that walker. That was something else entirely.

"People were here, the writin' on the doors din't happen by itself. Might be some thing'" he shrugged his shoulders and hoisted his bow a little more comfortably on his shoulder, stepping gently, carefully, over the body on the floor.

* * *

 

"Maybe she gave in cause there was nothing left" Aaron said, moving further into the building. Evie looked over at him and shrugged.

"Look. I'm sorry about what happened." Morgan held his stick free hand up to stop her.

"We've all lost people. We all dread the day we see something that reminds us of that." Evie nodded gratefully.

"Yeah. I guess. C'mon we shouldn't leave him alone"

***

Evie found herself faced with a closed door with a small gold sign on it. 'Kitchen' it read. Her mind thought staff room, store cupboards, water coolers, cutlery and crockery. She took a steadying breath. She hated doing this on her own. Despised it, but Daryl would need time, and the quicker they got out of here the better.

Her gut twisted for the third time that morning, this wouldn't do. If she was fighting a walker and a cramp debilitated her she'd be done for, and with Daryl shutting her out she'd probably not be able to rely on his coming to her rescue. Aaron and his pasta had a lot to damn well answer for. Although she did start to wonder if it was some stress induced IBS.

She breathed through it, and banged on the door as it passed, straining her ears for any sound behind it.

There was nothing, not a groan, a scratching, the creak of a floorboard, nothing. She didn't trust it, and waited quietly, hoping to hear something. At least then she would know what she was dealing with. It would be nice to be in a position to know what was going on for once. At least today, after...

Just after.

She held her breath, but silence echoed back to her hard, so she reached slowly for the door handle.

She pushed the door, expecting it to swing open, and jumped back into a fighting stance before she realised the door hadn't moved, not an inch. She frowned and tried again. It was like something was pushing back against her,

"What the hell?" She punched the door, shoved it with her body, but it wasn't shifting. She stood back, ready to call out for help, when she felt the release in her lower abdomen.

Everything suddenly fell into place, every look, every ounce of tension, every drawing of that thick curtain across Daryl's mind.

Now? She thought. Not on the horse, not running through the wilderness. Not in the last six months.

Now.

She had to deal with it. She needed to approach Daryl about it. She wracked her brain, trying to remember if she had anything with her.

She felt wet, and sticky, and uncomfortable, and she needed to get away and get... Sorted.

* * *

 

Daryl was creeping through a basement full of wooden furniture stacked together in dangerously towering piles. Chairs precariously balanced on chairs, upside down on tables.

Then he smelled it. Evie's bleeding had started, and the scent didn't so much as flow down to him, but attacked him in a gale force blast. He bared his teeth and inhaled deeply, while fighting the very reaction which was already taking place. He was moving back towards the stairs which had led him down there before he even realised what he was doing.

He had to physically stop himself, holding onto the doorframe and bracing himself.

But then he heard her calling out, and how could he leave her needing him? He tried to pull his fangs back, and with effort he managed, but it was hard going. He took a deep Steadying breath, and exhaled slowly, before taking the creaking old steps three at a time.

_Mmmmhmm she smell good don' she? Take it easy bro. Don't go killin' her now._

Daryl gritted his teeth against Merle's voice in his head, he wasn't stupid. He'd learnt his lesson. He learnt the hard way, which just made it sink in all the more.

"Daryl?" Her voice was closer now, and he span on his heel to follow the sound.

"I can't get this door open" she said with an apologetic look. Daryl held his breath and looked at the door, wondering why Aaron and Morgan hadn't come when she called. They were all together in this. All of them.

He pushed it gently and it gave a little, only to snap back in to place.

"Something's against the door" he said, and watched as Evie screwed her face up.

"How? Unless there's another way in and out." Evie chewed her lip and Daryl was tempted to scent her.

He withheld, barely. He wondered what the room was worth, if it would yield anything of interest.

"It's a kitchen," Evie said in a rush, answering the question he hadn't said out loud. "There could be food, water." Intrigue was getting the better of him, what would be stacked against the door? How did whoever had blocked it get out? Did whoever had blocked it get out?

"A'ight" he said, his voice strange to his own ears as he tried to speak without air.

It was getting difficult just to be around her, he could sense the blood, he realised, he knew it was there in the same way he just knew his own name. His mouth watered and his skin tingled. He bit his lip hard to fill his mouth with the acrid taste of himself. He braced his shoulder against the door and looked at Evie.

"Get ready" he said, just in case. She nodded and pulled her knife up, and he shoved with all his might, his feet slipping on the floor before the load began to give and the door finally opened. He held it there a moment, listening for any evidence of walkers or people. His lip had already healed and he bit it again as Evie leaned forward, far too close to him.

He shoved the door again and finally it stayed open.

He felt Evie's hand on him and the images in his head turned dark and bloody. She put her hand directly in his pants pocket and removed his torch, shining it into the dark kitchen.

Then she was gagging, hard, and Daryl could do nothing but breathe in whatever smell was attacking her.

* * *

 

Evie coughed and spluttered, dragging her tshirt up to cover her nose. She thought she'd got used to the smell in the building but as Daryl shoved the door and it finally stayed put the smell got stronger, more cloying. It didn't so much coat her throat as line her lungs and breathing got difficult as it got stronger.

She didn't even think what she was doing as she grabbed for Daryl's torch until her hand was in his pocket, and she willed her unsteady hand not to graze anything she shouldn't be touching. She'd suddenly forgotten about her period. That particular natural phenomenon just wasn't important right then.

"Walkers" Daryl rasped in a weird voice, like he had a mouthful of food or water. She looked at him and then shine the light behind the open door.

A huge pile of the dead, each fully put down, was stacked behind the door. Evie frowned and pulled her tshirt from her nose and mouth, she turned to Daryl, who was also frowning hard at it.

"Why?" She asked, and he turned to her. Something in his eyes sent her heartrate racing. She shook her head at him, understanding dawning in her mind. He looked like he was struggling to hold it together, and without thinking twice she tossed his torch at him and fled from the kitchen doorway back to the walker that looked like Beth, back to the entrance and out of the door.

It wasn't quite the look he had in the parking lot, there was that.  
She stood breathing hard with her back against the outer wall of the building. The sudden brightness of day, even with the heavy cloud cover, made her squint, but she didn't care that she couldn't see clearly.

_After all this time you think he's gonna eat you? What's wrong with you, Evie?_

Freya sounded exasperated.  But his eyes had been dark, darker than normal, and wanting. The leering smirk she'd seen in the multi storey garage wasn't there, but still.

_You've just proved him right again Evie._

She stood up, having caught her breath, and went to enter the building again, feeling a little ashamed of herself thanks to Freya's words.

The door flew inward, almost dragging her with it as her fingers brushed the handle. She let out a startled sound and crashed into Daryl's solid chest. This was too familiar. She went to step back from him but he gently took her upper arms and held her still.

"Evie"

"I know" she looked up into his face "I know what's going on. That's why I ran" he wasn't breathing, she noticed, and she hated that he had to hold his breath around her. Why should he have to do that?

"This is... I can't stop it" he'd taken two large steps and they were suddenly outside again. He nodded gently, finally taking his hot hands off her.

"I know" his voice was different, changed by the lack of air. She slumped a little, shook her head and shrugged.

"I don't know how to make it better." She whispered. Daryl shrugged right back at her, shoving his hands deep into his pockets, looking at the ground between his feet.

"I c'n shut ya out, ain't no problem."

"I don't want to be shut out!" Daryl's eyes shot to hers then, and she realised she had yelled.

Aaron and Morgan came from the building in a rush as she did so, looking between Evie and Daryl as an awkward silence fell over them.

"We'll take the other buildings. Ya check the cars for us, Evie. Best have someone out here on watch, anyway." She nodded, not knowing what else she could do. Four other buildings. It would be dark when they finally finished. She chewed her lip and Daryl called her

"Hey. We'll get some decent rest n we'll go on in the morning" it was like he read her mind. How did he do that if she were shut out?

But they were gone, and she couldn't ask.

She got to thinking about those walkers, and wondering if there was another way into that kitchen. She couldn't sit and worry about Daryl's frame of mind.

She looked around, ensuring the guys had gone, and slipped around to the back of the building.

There wasn't anything of note outside, but there was an open window. It could explain how the person who stacked up the dead got out. She wondered if it was the Beth look alike. Everyone had succumbed, and she'd finally given up. It made Evie feel very sad, and she shook the thoughts away, grabbing onto the open window frame and hoisting herself up.

She crouched for a moment, squinting into the darkness of the room. The kitchen, what a stroke of luck. The smell didn't seem to penetrate this far, and she could breathe. Intrigue was poking her relentlessly, and she dropped down into the dark room.

Ignoring the bodies she rummaged quickly through two cupboards, finding a few cans and shoving them quickly in her pack without reading the labels. She also found some jerky, and she ripped a packet open, stuffing a stick in her mouth and sucking on it. In the dead fridge was a six pack of water bottles, and she shoved them under her arm, still sucking the salt from the jerky hanging from her mouth.

She turned around, wondering if this was all there was. She put the water bottles on the small countertop and placed her pack next to them, rummaging deep inside for fresh underwear and possibly some kind of sanitation device. Didn't she always have a tampon rolling around down there in the bottom of her bag, just in case Mother Nature decided to show up again?

She pulled out handfuls of stuff she'd accumulated, rusty screwdriver, the arrow that should have killed her, her torn tshirt.

She huffed a small laugh when she found her fresh panties were black, and grimaced at the only tampon she found, it was fluffy, ragged, and she wasn't sure it was entirely safe. She chewed her lip, contemplating it, then whipped off her boots, jeans and underwear. She grabbed one of the bottles from the six pack and poured it into her cupped hand, dousing herself with the lukewarm water in a poor effort to be clean.

She dried off with her torn tee and checked her bag again for something less fluffy and unsanitary than she had already found.

A towel, all wrapped in its own disposable wrapping. It would do.  
She grimaced, though, she was hoping to plug herself up somehow as if it might help between her an Daryl. She shook her head with a smile and redressed. If someone, anyone, had told her to plug herself up a year ago she'd have probably socked them one, right in the kisser.

Her underwear was only lightly soiled. She left them on the floor of the kitchen and turned to the window, chucking her bag out first, and balancing herself with the water bottles so they wouldn't drop and break.


	40. Chapter 40

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning of sexy times.

By the time Aaron, Morgan and Daryl were done it was getting dark. Evie was sitting leaning against a car's rear wheel with a tatty homemade poncho wrapped in her arms.

"Anything?" She asked quietly, but the men shook their heads in unison.

"The cars?" Aaron asked hopefully. Evie smiled.

"Both have fuel. I found some water, pain medication, and this delightfully dirty poncho." She caught Daryl trying not to look at her. "I was thinking we could take both cars. We might even get them back to Alexandria and then... We'll have a couple extra vehicles." She could hear Aaron agreeing with her but her eyes were drawn to Daryl, who was turned slightly away but looking at her sideways, eyes narrower than anything, he was cautious and suspicious. "I think we should get some rest. Move on either after dark or early in the morning" Evie said, trying to ignore Daryl's face. He nodded. She was glad. He'd had a tough time, and he needed to chill out a while, even if he didn't sleep.

***

"What're ya doin?" Daryl asked her as Aaron and Morgan traipsed into one of the less stinky buildings they'd cleared. Evie turned to him with her arms folded. He hadn't got closer than 6 feet to her, and she wasn't going to let him keep avoiding the elephant in the room.

"I think I'm getting rid of _them_ so _we_ can talk." She shrugged, keeping her arms folded. "your reaction to that walker"

"I knew it weren't her" he cut her off abruptly. "I ain't about to think someone dug her up and hung her here, miles from where we put her to rest."

"Daryl!" Evie dropped her arms to admonish him, shocked. How could he talk about her that way? "Is this coldness a coping mechanism or are you really a monster?" She shook her head, cringed internally at her choice of phrasing, and noticed how he leaned back from her. She narrowed her eyes, and though it was dark she knew he could see. "You don't have to hide from me, Daryl. You can be yourself with me" He needed to deal with this, and there was one way she knew how to clear the air. She took a step forward and he took a step back.

* * *

 

"I do. Right now I do" he said cautiously, taking a small step back as she moved forward. Now the blood was present this was harder. "I looked up at her, it, hangin' there n I knew it was gonna happen to all of ya. Everyone..." He paused, not knowing what the point of this was. He was struggling so hard to keep composure, while something deep inside him was telling him they were alone, do it, blame walkers. "What is this? all I wanna do is rip ya in two right now." He tried to shake that deep down voice away. He didn't want her to die, he'd be lost without her. "D'ya understand how hard it is for me to jus' stand here with ya? Talk with ya?" He put his hands in his hair and looked away from her shining skin, her glowing curls. He took a breath, finally, and let it out slowly.

"You won't" she said softly, quietly.

"I wanna. Bad." He answered sullenly. Did he? She was making him hungry just standing there. Everything inside him was at odds. Nurture, protect, eat, kill.

"You won't" she said more forcefully, and he realised she was right behind him, had moved up to him silently and taken him by surprise. He went to move away again but her hand shot out and grabbed him. By closing himself off he hadn't expected any of this, couldn't feel her, and he stopped dead, staring at her hand on him. He took another shaking breath, and her scent was strong, almost demanding.

"I might." He managed, the words thick in his throat. He chanced a glance at her face, and she was smiling beautifully at him, dazzling, her eyes all sparkling and bright in the dark. She shook her head, still smiling, and his skin tingled as her fragrance was flung at him from her bouncing curls. "'M afraid" he managed, looking at her, wanting her, dead or alive he wanted her, and she felt it, he could tell.

"I'm not." She said, moving her hand down his arm, wrapping her fingers around his. He looked at their hands, carefully looked up into her face again, and she tugged him gently back towards the abandoned cars.

* * *

 

Daryl's eyes were dark and bore into her, as if they could see right to her soul. He knelt between her legs in the back of the car. Evie licked her lips slowly, suddenly feeling very dry. Daryl's eyes fell to her mouth and he mirrored the gesture, she caught a glimpse of his fangs as he did so.

"Ya sure ya wanna do this?" He asked her quietly, his rough voice somehow hypnotic. She nodded slowly and shallowly, swallowing hard. She exhaled gently and nodded again, more positively, looking Daryl in the eye.

"I think we need to prove once and for all that you can trust yourself, Daryl" He inhaled deeply and a smile grew on his face. She supposed she should have been scared, but death was something she had to face every single day. It would come some time, and if that day was the , what better way to go?

"Ya smell so good" Daryl said throatily, leaning forward and putting his hand in her hair, while his nose found her neck. She strained not to giggle as his scenting pulled cold air past her neck, and sent tingles through her body. Daryl reacted to the subtle shiver by firming his hand in her hair and gently brushing his lips at her neck.  
His free hand ran down her body, and up under her tshirt, finding her breast and running his thumb over the nipple. Evie pushed her body into his hand, and he gently nipped at her flesh. This was what she envisioned, this was how the first time was supposed to be. She hummed gently as his fingers tweaked and pinched over her bra, her hands found his face and she pulled his mouth to hers, kissing him long and deep. He pulled away, leaving her open mouthed, his fangs glittering in the rapidly growing darkness.

She ran her hands over Daryl's chest and down to his thighs as he leaned over her, venom swelling and dripping from his extended canines. He reached for the hem of Evie's tshirt and pulled it over her head, flinging it into the front seat and finding her mouth again as his hands wound their way into her hair.

Evie was lost in him, his teeth scraping and nipping as her hands fumbled with his belt and buttons. She wasn't expecting him to suddenly stop, both more than half naked, the windows steamed to opaque, the warmth between them causing sweat to stand out on her skin. He was positioned further down her body now, face to face with her belly button, which he had already nibbled around.

"Daryl?" She asked him, he was breathing heavily through his open mouth. His fangs all but drooling on her bare skin.

* * *

 

He had to stop himself. As the pictures in his head got darker and more somber, as he neared her crotch, now only covered by the thin black stretch of fabric that was her panties. As her thighs automatically drew apart in expectation, her hands threatening to push his head lower.

Images of her prone body all but drained, eyes dull, mouth open, the car filled with blood seeping, oozing through the cracks at the doors. Bloody fingerprints all over her body, cold and unmoving.

  
The scent was all consuming, and he needed a moment to regain his composure.

"Daryl?" Frustrated, not panicked, she asked him a whole bunch of questions just in her tone. What are you doing, why have you stopped, is this ok?

"Need a sec" he breathed, venom dripping in its own expectation of what came next. He'd already decided he'd not drink from... There, couldn't trust himself to bite at her thighs and groin, not yet. Not tonight. He looked up at her, their eyes meeting over her barely covered skin. She smiled, so sweetly, and whispered.

"Do it, I trust you." So darkly, so at odds with her sweet smile and prettily flushed cheeks.

He threw caution to the wind as she thrust against him, desperate and needy, and he pulled her underwear off as fast as his superhuman body would let him. He breathed her in, closing his eyes and enjoying the moment. He didn't smell copper, there was no metallic tinge to this, it was pure, fresh. He opened his eyes and flew forward, all but burying his face inside her.

It was as close to heaven as he thought he'd ever get. The noises that came from her just added to the sensation, and he voiced his own string of grunts and moans as he greedily lapped at the blood that had collected in her pussy. Forcing himself not to picture anything, not to want anything, more than what was there at that moment. Her and him, alive and in ecstasy.

She was clean far too quickly, he pulled away and kissed her inner thigh before looking upon his work, she glistened, shone. He looked up at her and she was watching him, eyes half closed. He crawled up her body slowly and pushed his face against hers, knowing he was slick with her blood, not caring. He forced her mouth open, made her taste herself on his tongue. She moaned into his mouth, and pushed at his shoulders.

* * *

 

He leaned back from her, and she tried to catch her breath. He was smothered in her blood, like he'd been eating raw meat. She giggled, because in a way he had.  
She hadn't come, but she'd been so close when he stopped and just breathed on her. The fucking tease.

He smiled as she laughed gently, his fangs twinkling.

God he was sexy.

She licked her lips, and his mouth was on hers again, his erection rubbing against her, until she threw her legs a little wider and thrust at him, and his cock slid inside easily. She must have been bleeding more than she thought.  
She grunted into his mouth and he pulled away, much to her dismay. Kissing him, tasting herself on his tongue, felt like all that mattered. Gently he moved inside her, and she wriggled as if to make him go faster. He smiled at her darkly and shook his head.

"We do this my way" he whispered, and Evie threw her head back, frustrated but loving it.

* * *

 

He saw the opportunity, and buried his fangs into the crevice where her neck met her shoulder, and she gasped, shocked. He sucked on her hard, and she melted into it, thrusting her hand into his hair and moaning through her nose.

Colour burst into his world, which was already brighter than the Average human's. Scents got stronger, and his need became more urgent as she squeezed herself around him, heels digging into his ass as she began to move with him. Her free hand moved from his arm to his shoulder, and her nails bit into his skin as she called out.

His own orgasm wasn't far behind, he pulled away from her neck and lay his forehead against hers. She was slick with sweat, though it felt cool on his skin. He gritted his teeth to keep from roaring into her ear as his balls twitched almost painfully, and he filled her with his come.

But he wasn't finished, there was more. He wanted to carry on into the night, feed on her free blood until morning. He began to edge down her body but her foot came up and landed flat on her chest.

"No more" she said dreamily "I can't, I'm spent" He looked up at her face and balked as he saw the blood there. He pulled out and threw himself back from her against the opposite rear door.

"Evie" he managed, heart beating too fast, fangs suddenly, painfully, shooting back into his upper jaw. He'd done it again, was all he could think, he'd hurt her. Evie was moving towards him, hands around him suddenly.

"It's ok," she whispered, squeezing him gently "Daryl it's ok, I'm not hurt." She pulled away and he got a better look at her blood caked face. She popped a finger in her mouth and then ran it down her cheek, drawing a line through the mess there. "See?" She said with a smile.

But his heart wouldn't slow, and he daren't breathe as he watched her, everything falling slowly back into place. He dove for her, and hugged her as tight as he trusted himself too.

"For a second, I thought"

"No, I know" Evie cut him off mid sentence "I'm ok, Daryl. I'm ok."

***

She fell asleep not ten minutes later, her head in his lap. She'd just about managed to clean her face up, with an already damp tshirt she pulled from her bag. Daryl toyed with her hair, watching the sky out of the window. After a grey and miserable day, now there wasn't a cloud to be seen.

They should have left, headed back to Alexandria, but it was so peaceful where they were, and sitting there, stroking her head, was all he wanted to do. He could almost forget the world had gone to hell. That he'd made and lost so many friends.

Almost, but not quite.

He wished he could forget. He wished especially that he could forget the Beth like walker they'd found, dangling from the ceiling, and the way the horse had looked at him before he died. The look in Evie's eyes when she was so sure she was going to die.

Those things, if he had a choice, those things would be the ones he wanted gone.

But there was no choice, Everything stayed with him. Every kill, every loss.

He knew that perhaps he had loved Beth. Not like he loved Evie, it wasn't the same, but she had done so much for him. A simple argument ended with a hug, flipping the bird to the burning cabin, helping him to believe that maybe good people existed. He had loved her, his first real feeling of what love could be and now she was gone.

That wasn't going to happen with Evie, he would never let that happen. He sighed, a gentle breath that didn't steam up the now clearing windows. He would let her sleep a while, and they would leave before sunrise. He would get Evie back to Alexandria in one piece. He would not take her eyes off her for a moment, or leave her cold without his emotion spilling into her own mind from his, not ever again. Evie would live to see the end of this, to see the end of forever, by his side. No man or woman would hurt her, no one would creep in and change her like they had Beth, because he was too stupid and too self consumed to stop it happening.

Beth had perhaps lost a little of herself in that hospital.

Evie must never have that opportunity.


	41. Chapter 41

The cars didn't make it quite as far as they hoped they would. About four miles from Alexandria the first coughed and spluttered and stalled, and despite their best combined efforts, it wouldn't restart. The four of them got into the second car, Aaron and Morgan at the back, Evie and Daryl up front, and managed precisely two more miles before the vehicle overheated and started steaming.

"Shoulda checked the fluids" Daryl admonished as he backed away from the burning steam when he opened the hood.

"There's nothing we can do?" Aaron asked, and Daryl shook his head.

"Nah, Engine'll be screwed. We'll have to walk. Only two miles or so." He looked at Evie, an unspoken question, and she nodded at him. She'd be fine, she was always fine.

He'd been excessively protective since they started moving, overly attentive. It was unnerving. When Aaron had laid on the horn of the car behind them Daryl had all but shoved her into the footwell out of the sight of danger.

"I can walk two miles" she huffed in response to his look. "C'mon."  They were out in the open, on the road. It didn't worry her like it had before. Now that she could feel Daryl, she felt safe again, and now he was being so present she knew she had nothing to be scared of.

"There are so few walkers" she marvelled half an hour later, having walked a mile and seen none. She narrowed her eyes and looked at Aaron. "Is it always like this?" Aaron shrugged and nodded at the same time.

"I guess we're very lucky, new development in the middle of nowhere, there were few here to start with." Evie frowned and Daryl answered for her.

"They migrate. Don't think ya safe, it's false. Ya people need to learn how to deal with 'em before they come." His voice was dark, and though it was awful to think about, it was true. Silence fell among the group at Daryl's words. There was no answer and no argument to be had.

***

When Alexandria's gate and fences loomed large before them, Daryl stopped, his hand firm and steadying on Evie's chest so she had no choice but to stop as well.

"Are you ok?" She asked him, and he shook his head gently, turning back towards the gates.

"Tension." He said, bristling a little. He close his eyes and Evie knew he was listening, then He was on the move again, walking faster than anyone could keep up with.

"Daryl!" Evie called after him "what's going on?" He turned to her, to Aaron and Morgan too.

"Ya can't hear Shoutin'?" They all listened hard, then took to their feet once more, rushing forward at a jog to the sound of screams from within the walls.

The smell hit Evie like a tonne of bricks. Copper, metal, making her reel, she looked to Daryl who had raised his upper lip in a sneer.

"Rick." Deanna's voice "Do it" Evie pulled a face and went to rush forward, but Daryl's hand was on her arm, holding her back, again.

A gunshot rang out and Evie jumped hard. More screams followed, and they finally reached the group, practically the whole town sat together in a rough circle watching Rick shoot their doctor in the face as Abraham held him.

Evie was stunned into complete silence at the sight, Daryl's hand still on her. Aaron balked as if he might be able to do something, and Morgan, Morgan was the only one to find his voice.

"Rick?" He asked gently, and Rick looked up as though he had no idea they were there, watching him. He was covered in blood, human and walker, and the look in his eyes sent Evie's heart racing.

* * *

 

"Rick has his reasons" Evie was glaring at Daryl over a steaming cup of coffee, sitting on the couch in the house she and Daryl had been told was theirs, to share with Glenn, Maggie and Tara.

Daryl went to speak again but Evie shook her head at him, cutting him off when he'd barely opened his mouth.

"He shot a man in the face." She said, emphasising every other word with a quick pause. Daryl nodded, not knowing what he could say. He'd said it. Rick had his reasons, Rick was taking charge.

"We missed halfa the night, we dunno what went down." He hoped that would end it. It had all been explained to her, what did she want? "I'mma work on the bike" he said, grabbing his vest and heading for the door. Evie stood up, as if to follow.

"I was going to come for a smoke, anyway." She said by way of explanation.

* * *

 

"People died, Evie." Daryl handed her back the pack of cigarettes and she looked at them a long moment before taking them. She shrugged, sitting down on the steps as he took them down off the porch to the bike.

"People always die." She answered him moodily. "Even before the world went to crap people were dying. It's not a reason." She lit the Morley, and sucked on it hard. Daryl pulled a rag out of his pocket and a wrench from a bag strapped to the bike. Evie watched him as he avoided talking about it.

"Noah, Glenn, Tara. Important people Evie, that's the difference." Evie scoffed, almost choking on cigarette smoke.

"No one life is more important than anyone else." Daryl turned to her, still resting on his haunches.

"Noah got me to you, Carol n Beth. Tara got Glenn back to us, back to Maggie. I don't know what ya think, but that makes 'em pretty important to me." Daryl turned away from her and she followed his eyes, seeing Rick approaching. In her mind, from what she had been told, Rick had gone bat shit and turned on the man already, he had offered to kill him already.

In truth she didn't know what to think. She just wanted to be safe, for her family to be safe.

Rick wasn't stupid, he wouldn't put them in danger for no reason, and the Alexandrian's were pretty naive.

"So," Daryl asked Rick, jolting Evie from her thoughts "he okay with it?" Rick nodded

"It was pretty much his idea. He gets it." Morgan. They'd stuck him in one of the unfinished houses and locked the door. Evie could understand that.

"It's got a bed n a bath, but it's still a cage, you know?" Evie puffed on her cigarette trying to look like she wasn't listening.

"He gets it." Rick said "He told me what happened out there with the trucks." Evie didn't want to think about that.

"He tell you about those guys he met? The Dub'yas?"

"Like that walker we saw, yeah." Evie blew smoke from her mouth and nodded

"We saw some, too. Walkers with Ws I mean" Rick nodded at her

"We need more watch points. And I'm gonna tell Deanna we don't need to go looking for people anymore." Evie and Daryl shared a look, Rick put his hands on his hips and narrowed his eyes. "You two feel different about it?" Daryl dipped his head and they replied in unison

"Yeah,"

"Well," Rick wasn't about to back down. Evie could understand his nerves about strangers. "People out there, they gotta take care of themselves, just like us." Rick paused and pointed towards the 'cell' "I'm gonna get him out. Shouldn't leave him in there any longer than we have to." Well, there was some compassion, at least.

She watched Rick walk away and turned her attention back to Daryl who was cleaning the bike's plug.

"Deanna will agree with him" she said, slightly worried. Daryl rolled his shoulders, screwing the plug back in to place

"I'll talk to him. " he said "but it looks like right now we got the day off." He turned to her and smiled, but she couldn't return it. A man had been slashed from ear to ear, another shot in the face, Noah had died while Glenn watched helpless. Noah who led Daryl and Rick, Tyreese and Sasha back to her and Carol and Beth at the hospital. Noah who carried so much guilt for Beth and Tyreese.

"I never got to thank him" she said quietly, almost to herself. Daryl put his wrench away and turned to her.

"He knew" he said, just as softly. "He was one of us, and he knew how thankful we all were for him." Evie stabbed her cigarette out on the porch floor.

"Still, I think I'm gonna go and see Tara. She woke up, so that's something." Daryl nodded shallowly,

"That's somethin'" he echoed.

Evie headed for the infirmary, passing Rick and Morgan on the way, sharing a good morning with Morgan as Rick talked to him quietly. He sounded grave. It suited the whole feeling of Alexandria, which was quiet and sorrowful. These people had lost more since her family had shown up than before, and that worried Evie.

She pushed open the infirmary door and Tara was up, standing on her own two feet with Rosita holding her hands to help.  
She turned her head as the door opened, as Evie gasped in delight at seeing her doing so well.

"Red!" Tara called, "how'd it go outside?"

* * *

 

It was later in the day when Rick called a town meeting, everyone gathered in his living room like some kind of somber party.

He and Morgan had carried Pete's body east and stumbled across the quarry from Hell.

Daryl sat on the window ledge and watched nonchalantly out the window. Rick had come to him first, explained the situation with the family.

"Needs more'n just us" Daryl had told him "maybe this is the excuse to get the whole town on side." Evie was concerned though,

"How many are there?" She'd asked him tentatively. Rick's face had gone dark, and Daryl knew what that meant. His scent had changed, too, become deeper and stronger.

"Thousands, tens of thousands" Evie's scent had changed slightly then, and her breathing caught in her throat as she gasped quietly.

"We c'n do it" Daryl tried to assure her, show her he wasn't scared. "We will do it." He could tell she wasn't convinced.

So he sat on the window ledge, listening again to Rick's plan, awaiting the inevitable protests from the residents, as Evie stood worried beside him. She distracted him with her fear, and no matter how much he tried to reassure her, it wasn't working.

"Ya'll be with me" he said when Rick fingered him out to lead the walkers with his bike. "Ya come with me, ya'll be safe. I'll keep ya safe." She frowned at him, and to his astonishment shook her head.

"I should stay back with Carol."

"No" his voice was far too harsh, too sharp. He took a moment and tried again. "I need ya where I c'n see ya" she shrugged her shoulders at him, Carter was arguing with Rick.

"I need to be where I am safe, Daryl. I'm not putting us both at risk by needlessly being out there, just clinging to you on that bike." Daryl had to clench his teeth to keep from getting too angry, in here, surrounded by people who were already wary of him. He was getting frustrated though,

"We need everyone we c'n get." He hissed quietly. "I can't leave ya behind." He couldn't find the words, couldn't voice what he really wanted to say. Evie shrugged at him with a small smile

"Then make sure you come back."

* * *

A dry run was planned for the next day, so a quiet day was to be had, a day of mourning and reflection.

Evie noticed Daryl was off with her, angry that she wouldn't fall into line and do as she was told, but she stood her ground. Firmly.

"If it all goes to shit and the herd come home, I'd rather be here, protecting the place so you have something to come home to" she said as they left Rick's house, standing in the street smoking cigarettes. Daryl had shaken his head at her, narrowed his eyes and gritted his teeth, but she could feel what he felt, and he wasn't impressed.

"I'd rather"

"I know." She cut him off, not needing to keep hearing it. "I can look after myself Daryl, I did for weeks, months. I appreciate that you think you know what's best for me, but I'm not a child. I'll be safer in here than I will ever be out there." She threw her cigarette to the ground and touched his arm gently "isn't that what you want?" He grunted and shrugged her off, annoyed. He was starting to irritate her but she was desperate not to let it show.

She smiled at him, and it just frustrated him more.

"Yeah" he managed "yeah I just want ya safe. I c'n keep ya safest." Evie shrugged her shoulders and dropped her hand from his arm, just as Rick came out of the house and asked Daryl to join him finishing showing Morgan around.

"I don't want to be a distraction" she said gently. "I'll see you tonight" she left him with Rick, going into their own house.

* * *

 

"I worked it out" Daryl said as Evie stepped out of the shower. He gave her the fright of her life and he forced himself not to smile when she physically jumped as he spoke.

"Jesus Christ, Daryl." He looked her over quickly, still slightly damp. Soaking wet hair straightened with the weight of the water and hanging down to her ass rather than curls bouncing around her elbows. The towel she was wrapped in barely covered her, but he had more to think about than her wet body, hidden from him by nothing than a scrap of cotton.

She was still bleeding.

He cleared his throat.

"Ya don't trust Rick." He pulled his eyes from her body and looked at her face. Her eyes were narrow, accusing, almost threatening him to look her up and down again.

"He shot a man in the face" she said, echoing her earlier words. Daryl nodded, but Evie apparently wasn't finished. "He took that man's body away from his kids, they've got nowhere to mourn him, no closure." She ran her hands through her wet hair, and her towel slipped a little. Daryl looked away.

"He was on the verge of shootin' someone else this afternoon." He chanced a look back at Evie, the swell of her breasts now just visible above the towel, and he licked his lips. "Carter, the guy with all the concerns back at the meetin'. He was plannin' to kill Rick. He was serious, too." He watched Evie walk up and sit next to him on the bed. She lay her head on his shoulder and he held his breath so as not to lose sight of what they were talking about.

"Everyone's on edge" she whispered. "It's not that I don't trust Rick, I do. But these people aren't ready, they're scared. Scared of Rick, worried by his actions. Scared of all of us and I'm scared they'll get us killed."

"Ain't gonna happen" Daryl huffed "y'ain't dyin' on my watch." Evie smiled at him, lifting her head from his shoulder and turning to a chest of drawers to rummage for clothes.

"Me and Maggie are making dinner, we want to eat together before you all go out there." She turned to him and he darted his eyes away, a small trickle of blood had escaped her and was running slowly down the inside of her leg. He'd watched it with interest as she bent over to her task of finding an outfit, towel already barely covering her ass riding up a little as she did so. "D'you wanna eat, before we, er, eat?" She held her free arm out to him, the other laden with jeans and a long sleeve tshirt.

The offer was too much for Daryl to refuse, and he dived for her at lightning speed, bypassing her offered arm and burying his face in her neck.

She groaned as he sucked on her, and he had to pull away quickly as his dick hardened painfully against his jeans. Sex and blood would always be one with him, he couldn't help the reaction his body had but it still made him feel awkward and clumsy.

"That's one of the reasons I really shouldn't go" she said, eying him seriously. "How can you be so blind to that? Sitting with you, clinging desperately to you, on the damn bike sounds like heaven but, shit Daryl, we'll have tens of thousands of walkers behind us. The last time we sat that close you had to stop and compose yourself. We won't have time for that."

So she thought he couldn't control himself when his family was in danger, when there was a very real threat of others dying and not just her. He clenched his jaw as he thought about that. She thought he was weak. Some lovesick puppy who could only think of sex and blood. He shook his head.

"Ain't n animal, Evie" he said standing and walking for the door "I have control. Shit I did this for years before ya showed up and got in my head."

* * *

 

The door slammed behind him and she listened to his boots on the stairs as he stomped down them.

She didn't think he was weak, she didn't mean that. She knew without a shadow of a doubt that she was. She knew what she looked like, wrapped in a towel and bending over the chest of drawers.

She knew that a single drop of blood had been working its way down her leg before she offered him a quick feed before dinner. She sat on the bed and huffed to herself. She was the problem, not him.

Although it felt pretty good to have his teeth on her, his erection pressing against her hip.

Sitting on the bike, vibrating as their engines do, wasn't going to help.

She went into the ensuite to clean up and marvelled at the very idea of it. Two years she was shitting in holes in the ground and here she was in an ensuite, looking at three different types of toothpaste and actual toilet tissue. Tissue!

She'd been wiping with leaves, paper and cloth and here they had tissue. She marvelled at the feel of it with her fingers and smiled to herself.

No wonder the family were so taken in by this place, it was like the world hadn't ended.

 


	42. Chapter 42

Daryl stood, leaning against the wall, and listened to Evie waking up. The deep and heavy breathing becoming less settled as she struggled to keep the morning at bay. She turned over once, twice, then rolled onto her back and huffed exasperated, giving in to the fact that morning was here, and she had to face another day of the Hell the world had become.

Today was dry run day, though everyone was making a much larger thing of it than it deserved. What with Maggie and Evie making everyone dinner, nice as it was. Giving Carol the night off, all sitting together like thanks giving.

Abraham drinking far too much, just like he had the night before, and the night before that.

Sasha just quiet, not contemplative quiet, just... quiet, blank, white noise.

They were both suffering, hard. As much as they'd all been through, Abraham and Sasha were taking it worst, Sasha with a handful of poignant deaths in a few days, and Abraham's whole reason to keep moving, just keep going day by day, flushed with a few words from Eugene.

But they were in dangerous states, and if Abraham had a roaring hangover on D-day, it could all go south extremely quickly.

"Hey" Evie turned again, now facing him.

"Hey" he replied quietly, still thinking on the problems people in the group were having. "Ya talk to Abraham n Sasha lately?" Evie sat up, the duvet pooling around her waist, the thin straps of her pj top slipping down her shoulders. Daryl bit his tongue.

"Not Sasha. Though, Michonne and Rosita said they had to chase her down outside the walls the other day. Abraham..." She laughed a little nervously "Abraham has talked at me. Loudly. About Pete's face after he was shot. Damn guy was laughing about it." She looked up at Daryl, bed hair draped sexily across one eye, he bit his tongue a little harder. "It was bad enough seeing it, I don't wanna live through it again, ya know?" Daryl nodded and hummed a reply, he'd have to keep an eye on them both, closely.

* * *

 

Evie had been on the road, covered in sweat and grime and blood, for months. She had woken up with leaves in her hair and mud soaking through to her ass. She had been covered in guts and thought little of it.

Here, now, waking up in a bed, clean, wearing actual pyjamas instead of the clothes she'd worn for a week, she felt uncomfortable. Daryl trying not to leer wasn't helping. She pushed the covers off and and kicked them to the end of the bed.

"Glenn seem...Twitchy...to ya?" Daryl was asking. She stretched and got out of bed, her back to him.

"No more than expected, he was almost killed by that little twerp." Daryl huffed a little laugh at her choice of words, He took a breath and Evie knew without a doubt that he had something important to say, she could almost smell it on him, a tension in the room, a darkness in his eyes as she turned to him.

"Maggie's pregnant" he said very quietly, and Evie jolted as if she'd been hit by an actual blow.

"WHAT?!" Daryl shushed her. She stared at him wide eyed. Pregnant. Maggie and Glenn. "How do you know?" She whispered, and Daryl shrugged. Same way he knew anything, he could feel it, smell it, shit he could probably hear it in there, cells multiplying.

"It's just, the smell, the feeling between them, 's'different" He chewed his lip as Evie opened a drawer and shuffled through for socks and underwear. She decided to change the subject. Exciting as this news was, it wasn't there's to talk about yet.

"I can't get used to this" she sighed, holding up a bra two sizes too small. "It's... Too easy" she turned to Daryl as he pushed from the wall and sat on the edge of the bed.

"Ain't all it seems" he said with a tone she was unsure of. "Jus' wait, ain't nothin' this easy no more" Evie felt her face screw up at his words, a question unspoken on her face. Daryl shrugged, stood. "I'mm'a be off soon. Ya comin' down?" Evie nodded, watching him leave, wondering at what he had said, like he knew something was coming, could feel something she didn't. Maybe he was just being dramatic, but it was unlike him to make too much of something that didn't deserve it. She dressed quickly, and jogged after him, Entering the kitchen to the smells of powdered eggs, toast and strong coffee.

***

No one could have predicted the coming of the wolves, though the disbanding of the herd was almost inevitable. That's what Evie kept thinking. 

  
Evie was standing in the kitchen of Rick's house, keeping Carol company as she made a casserole for dinner. Carol was different. As much as everyone knew her susie homemaker personality was an act, she was different. It was affecting her in a way no one else but Evie and Daryl seemed to notice. She'd made friends, and when she spoke of 'these people are weak' there was a look in her eyes, a sadness. She didn't want to lose them, and she thought there was a real possibility she might. The world was how it used to be for her, all except Ed and Sophia. Evie was pretty sure she was enjoying it more than she thought she would, being Carol from before. Not carrying a gun everywhere, not having to be a hero.

Daryl had told Evie about two little girls, and though Carol hadn't said much to him, she didn't need to. Not only was he rather extra sensory, Carol was his big sister, his best friend. He'd die for her as soon as he would for anyone else, sooner, and he knew her like he knew the back of his hand, like he knew his own name. Intricately, deeply.

"It's so noisy" Evie noted, glaring out of the kitchen window at Mrs Niedermeyer puffing on a cigarette on her front lawn.  
Evie shook her head, with a smile. "Someone finally talked sense into Shelly, she's smoking outside the house!" Carol smiled triumphantly, setting her timer for 45 minutes and approaching the window.

"Yeah, well, I try." She turned to Evie and then back again, and they watched as a man ran into view, slicing Shelly Niedermeyer almost in two. Carol gasped and backed from the window, bending a little at the waist as though she'd been punched in the gut, and Evie already had her knife in her hand. They ran for the door, and Carl was dashing down the stairs with a rifle in his hands.

"They're coming from all over!" He said in a panic, but Carol was on to him in an instant.

"You have to stay and keep Judith safe" she said, following Evie out the door and into the billowing smoke.

"What the Hell?" Evie asked, pulling her tshirt over her nose so as not to breathe the fumes.  
She lost Carol, in a fit of panic she'd headed for the walls where Maggie had taken Deanna, hearing Daryl's parting words in her head  
_Keep an eye on 'er, cause she won't. She'll try n look after everyone else._

Maggie and Deanna had already gone, and Evie came instead face to face with a stranger, covered from head to toe in black, only his eyes and forehead visible. A nasty scar, ragged and bumpy, spelling out W on his head. Her heart sped up, and he pulled down his bandanna to smile at her.

Why hadn't she taken a gun? They'd said they could have their guns now!

Instead she ran, turning on her heel and heading back towards home, towards more people.

She jumped over a dead body and landed in a crouch, turning and grabbing the weapon laying inches from the dead woman's hand.

Machete, score.

She was faster than the wolf, and he jumped the body as she turned and raised the machete in the air.  
He landed on it with a crunch, his weight bending her arm until she gave in and dropped him, she didn't know what she'd got, where she stabbed, there was a deafening noise she didn't understand which had started seconds before, and now this lump of a man was lying on her, squirming, blood bubbling out of his mouth. She reached for her small knife, and buried it in his temple.

It wasn't like the dead, it wasn't spongy like them.

The knife crunched, caught, and she couldn't get it out, but he stopped squirming, he pressed more weight into her, dead weight.

She tried to heave him off, and when she managed it Morgan was there. He'd pulled the dead man off.

"Ya didn't have to do that" he said seriously, and Evie shook her head,

"Thanks, no time to talk morals, we've got people dying all over the place. An eye for an eye." She went to run off, get help, be helpful, and Morgan called after her,

"Ain't no use in the whole world being blind"

What was the noise? She put he hands over her ears, spying Maggie and Deanna finally, but outside the gate. Spencer was running up to them, and they headed towards the noise.

* * *

 

Daryl grabbed the radio hooked to his shoulder, the noise of the horn screaming through his head.

"Hey, Rick, what's going on out there?"

"Half the herd broke off, they're heading for home" the radio hiss static "I'm gonna take the RV, get back there. You should keep going" Daryl was torn, completely in two. Half the pack, half. Nigh on 15 thousand strong. He looked at Abraham and Sasha, yelling over his engine

"Is that 20?" Abraham nodded. "Aight, the herd's split cause'a that noise," Sasha's face screwed up, and he shrugged as best he could. They couldn't hear it.

"Somethin's goin' on back home. Try n keep up" he sped off, Sasha saying something over the radio he barely heard.

Alexandria was in danger, and he could feel fear rippling through him that wasn't just his own. If the herd got home... He daren't think about it.

He ducked around a couple of walkers which he weren't entirely sure had broken off from the herd, when shots were fired. He turned to see what was going on when he almost dropped the bike, there was a car behind him, the inhabitants still shooting. He dropped the bike a gear and sped out of the way of danger. He hadn't seen Sasha or Abraham.

He slowed down, heading into the trees, when he smelled the acrid foulness that was his own blood, bitter, like pith. He looked at his hand and saw the blood running down through his sleeve.

Shit.

He pulled off his glove as blood began to pool uncomfortably inside, this was all he needed. With the herd on its way, Sasha and Abraham lost somewhere out there, and the feeling of overwhelming sorrow and fear he was getting in his gut, no doubt from Evie, an injury was one thing he really didn't want.

It was just a graze, he hadn't even felt it. A ricocheted bullet. It would heal on its own but it was inconvenient to say the least.

He grabbed his radio, calling for his comrades, bug nothing came back, and he was pretty sure he had been followed. He could smell people, but he couldn't tell if they were good or bad. His mind was racing too much to make sense of the new scents, he guessed. He was too worried about everything going on around him. He took a breath, and was surprised when it shook in his lungs.

Instinct told him something was very wrong, and he didn't have a chance to work out what it was when two women emerged in front of him with their hands raised in surrender.

It didn't feel like surrender. The brunette was fierce, and told him she earned what she took, and her eyes flicked behind him for a fraction of a second, and he knew there was someone there. Could smell it suddenly. A mixed smell of dirt and gravel and fresh cool water. A good smell mixed with a similar foul one. The way someone might smell of they were on the verge of changing, good to bad, bad to good. But still unsure.

He felt the crack on the back of his head, knew it would render any normal human person unconscious. He fell down, still unwilling to show who he really was. Evie would hate this.

He was bound roughly, resisting only by pushing his not inconsiderable weight into the ground beneath him. He feigned sleep, he listened as they spoke two women and a man, D, Sherry and Tina, apparently.

He felt sick to his stomach at the idea of what was going on at home while he played this game, pretending to be helpless as he worked these people out. Sure they tried to knock him unconscious, thought they had, but they didn't try to kill him, and there was no talk of it, either.

He hoped it was worth it.

* * *

 

Michonne had arrived back with a couple of Alexandrians that Evie hadn't had the chance to get to know. She'd been with Glenn, but they split up.

Evie watched Maggie's face very carefully as Michonne explained that Nicholas had gone with Glenn, it wasn't pretty. A shadow of worry, her eyes glassine over a little. Evie squeezed Maggie's upper arm. 

"Hey, you ok?" Maggie nodded.

"He'll send a sign, that's what he said. He'll come back." Her voice, her face, was firm, and Evie could believe it, too. Glenn would never leave Maggie, not if he could help it. The pair were made each other.  
She turned away, ready to help clean up after the wolves attack, but there was a scream, a bellow, from outside.

Rick.

"Open the gate!!" She heard again, and people were moving around her.

Then she felt the pull of Daryl. She'd never felt it like this before, They'd never been separated by such distance. He was alone, she knew, he was hurt, and though he wasn't in imminent danger he was worried. It was a physical pull.

He'd told her about Foundlings and their Makers having a strong bond, but had they really shared enough blood to have something similar? Or was this some greater force, some divine intervention.

Were they made for each other the way she knew without a doubt Glenn and Maggie were? Soul mates?

Rick rushed in through the gate and explained what happened, what was happening, and Evie had no time to worry about her relationship. Daryl would be OK, Glenn would be OK.

The worry now was those within the walls as the herd approached unhindered.

Rick gathered the town together, explained the best way to handle the situation, quiet, dark. But the Alexandrians were looking at Rick like he had done this to them, as if it were all his fault.

When Aaron stepped up and told them he had found his bag, that it came in with the wolves, Evie could have kicked herself. She knew he had dropped it, she even said to Daryl. She clenched her fists and gritted her teeth. So the intruders, at least, were partly her fault. If she'd made herself heard, if she'd mentioned it again. She sighed through her nose. If, buts, and maybes. Daryl had been right, they didn't bear thinking about.

The town dispersed, mumbling and chattering amongst themselves. Rick took Morgan to one side.

"They'll be back" Maggie said, touching her arm the way Evie had touched hers before, reassuring. She must have mistook Evie's pensiveness. Evie nodded firmly.

"Yeah. They will. We'll be fine."

No one could have predicted the coming of the wolves, though the disbanding of the herd was almost inevitable.

Perhaps she was wrong about that.


	43. Chapter 43

Daryl was beginning to think his play with these people wasn't worth it. He'd tried to tell them he wasn't who they thought he was, told them he had somewhere to be, but they weren't listening. They had an agenda, and he was part of their plan. He began to think someone had treated them awful badly to do what they were doing, hoping to use him as bait to get away.

The pull from Alexandria was getting stronger, and he needed to get back.

Then there was something else, his senses picked up on the minute sound of Tina's eyes fluttering. He heard her breath catch for just a second, and he knew the time was now. She was going down, natural instincts, his senses sharpening to take advantage of the unconscious body which was about to be in front of him, told him so. As the blond collapsed he grabbed the bag in front of him and made a mad dash for it. It was clumsy and stupid, but he still didn't want to use any of his extra speed or strength with these people if he didn't need to. He hated being what he was, the fewer people who knew about that, the better.

He cursed his luck as a walker started descending on him from behind, nothing much left of it but bone and moss, he shot it with his crossbow, which he all but ripped from the group's large cumbersome pack. How much shit did these people need just to run?

But medicine fell out too, insulin, and it made him feel really shitty.  
Torn between just running, finding Abraham and Sasha and leaving all this shit behind, and returning the Meds, he stared at the boxed kit and chewed his lip.

"Goddammit" he whispered to himself, knowing he wasn't going to leave them in the lurch.

He grabbed the pack and began to return to the people who had kidnapped him, hit him, and bound him. He was getting angry, and no matter what he told Rick, these people weren't coming home.

"Drop the gun." He gruffed roughly at 'D' who had turned on him with the weapon ready to fire "Drop it, give it to me" he aimed his crossbow with one hand and took the gun with the other. Now these people were scared. It poured off them like water vapour, steam. He still felt shitty, but damn it, it was the principal. "I got somewhere to be, hurry up." He said harshly "what ya got for the duffel" they looked at him blankly. "I know ya'll need it, but ya put me through too much shit jus' to give it back. What ya got?" The pull from home was turning to an intense need, and it weren't just Evie any more. He glared at the man, D, and gestured with his chin.

"What was ya carvin'?" D looked stunned.

"It's just, my grandfather taught me"

"Don't care, hand it over."he thrust his hand out. "It's the principal" he said in a rush. Why was he doing this? He wasn't even sure, they had to pay for holding him up, now they were holding him up even more, flapping their gums and taking their time.

He pocketed the small wooden soldier the guy had been whittling, not even looking at it twice, and kicked the duffel towards them.

"Good luck, ya gonna need it" he spat, turning to leave as the roar of an engine stopped him in his tracks.

Ah crap.

He couldn't in all consciousness leave these people to die.

* * *

 

Evie had found herself with Jessie in what was fast becoming Alexandria's large cemetery.

"I was sorry, about your husband" Evie said, feeling awkward as she shovelled dirt on a woman she had never known. She was tempted to hide in her hair, but it was pulled back in a hair tie she'd found, and she couldn't. Jessie pulled her sleeves up above her elbows and puffed a breath of air.

"Why?" Evie shrugged, standing up, back already aching from the work.

"Regardless of what he did, he was your kids' dad." She shook her head gently "they didn't deserve what happened, even if Pete did" Jessie watched her a moment longer, face frowning, before continuing to dig yet another grave. Evie caught her eye again, and they gave each other a shallow nod. Evie didn't know Pete, or the kids, but she'd heard how Ron had taken it, how Sam was suffering.

"Hey, no, not here, not them" Rick appeared from behind the trees which offered a little privacy to that area of the town. Evie rubbed the back of her wrist across her forehead and it came away wet.

"Can't leave 'em out here, Rick," she said.

"People don't like seeing this" Jessie backed her up "we can't leave them to smell, attract disease." Rick nodded, hands on his hips like he meant business.

"Not them." He said darkly, gesturing to the pile of dead intruders

"So, what?" Jessie asked. "What do you want us to do?" Evie stuck her shovel in the ground so it wouldn't fall and stood up straight

"If we had a tarp, a blanket even?" Rick nodded

"Alright. We'll get rid of them, burn them, after. The dead're drawing enough as it is without lighting the world up too." Evie nodded, leaving to find something to cover the wolves with. She headed for the house, thinking maybe she had an old tarp in her old kit from on the road.

She could still feel the pull of Daryl in her chest, like they were connected with an invisible thread, and every move he made she felt. He wasn't any closer, he wasn't in any more danger than he had been, so far, but the feeling was there. Like... Like he was subconsciously calling her name.

She smiled to herself, here she was being some kind of romantic poet again. She was probably just worried about him, and herself and her family. Something in her head hoping he was thinking about her as she stay here, lying in wait for whatever may happen next with the dead clawing at the walls.

She heard some shouting, a commotion at the fences, but paid it no mind. She had to get those dead bodies covered, Jessie was right. Why had none of them thought about disease? They had more than enough with one epidemic going on.

She finally found her tarp, someone had been 'tidying' and it was in a cupboard. She didn't think too much of it, grabbed it and went to leave the house.  
That's when the cracking noise ricocheted around town, when the grumbling and groaning got a little louder. She had taken the porch steps, two at a time, and turned to face the gate when the watch tower began to fall.

* * *

 

20 miles.

Daryl kicked a bunch of dead burnt up leaves out of his path in a huff. 20 miles, on foot, trying to find Abe and Sasha on the way. 

It was doable, but it was a pain in the ass.

20 miles, and when he got the other two it would be slow going. He stamped on the head of a walker, melted to the ground like the napalmed assholes in Atlanta. Around the hospital. The time his world all fell apart and everything changed. Again.

He was not in a good mood, thinking about Atlanta not helping, and he could feel anger bubbling and boiling over inside him. The pull from Alexandria got more urgent with every minute and he could swear that that was what had made him so blind, and offer help to people who didn't want it, but took advantage because of it. Assholes, all of them.

He turned around, wondering whether to go back the way he had come, or to continue through the burned trees. Would there still be people lying in wait for escapees? Nah. That ship'd long sailed. He turned again, catching something out the corner of a very keen eye.

He rushed forward and pulled back the tree branches to find a tanker. He smiled to himself and uncovered it fully. This was what those assholes were after, this was Patty. Fuck 'em. This was his now.

He hopped in and eyed the controls carefully before starting her up, and edging her out between blackened and singed trees.

* * *

 

Evie had turned to run back up the porch steps when something grabbed her from behind and dragged her forwards instead. She turned her head a little and saw Michonne's profile.

"What?" She gasped, barely running on her own feet as Michonne pushed an pulled at her.

"Walkers got in, Deanna's hurt. We gotta get somewhere inside" Evie didn't say she that she was on her own doorstep when Michonne had led her away, she daren't.

"Hurt?" She managed instead, not sure if Michonne meant bitten, and then Jesse was flying out of her front door, beckoning them all in.

"I have Judith, come on."

***

Evie peered through the curtains at the window as walkers milled around on the street outside. She'd never seen so many. Sure, hundreds at a time, that was, yeah she'd seen that. This? This was something else altogether.

She went to pull the curtain back and Rick's hand shot out and grabbed her wrist.

"We stay quiet, we stay still." Evie frowned

"They're not gonna just leave on their own" she whispered.

They'd put Deanna upstairs and checked her over. It was a cut, she'd landed on some tools when the weight of the dead knocked her down. For a moment the air in the room turned light and easy to breathe, until Michonne double checked and found the bite on Deanna's waist.

"Daryl's on his way" Evie said to no one in particular, and no one questioned her, she wasn't sure they'd even heard, but she could feel him getting closer.

We could have done with you yesterday, she thought bitterly, still peering through the nets at the Windows. Aloud she said

"I hope everyone got to safety in time"

"Not everyone" Rick said, making Evie feel two inches tall with his tone, let alone his words. Of course they hadn't. Deanna was bitten on an area they couldn't chop off.

Noise from the garage had them all turning on their heel and running, and walkers began to pile into the house.

***

Evie held tight to Sam's hand, he held her in a death grip, but she didn't mind. She would have hated to be a kid right then. Real live nightmares walking the earth, killing your family and friends, turning your little life upside down.

"Ok?" She asked him, and he shook his head, petrified. "Me and mom have got you, Sam, and Ron is right there with Carl. If you can be really quiet we'll be fine" it had been a struggle to get him into a bloodied sheet, he cried and squirmed. Evie thought Jessie's idea of telling him to pretend to be someone who isn't afraid was stupid, though she kept quiet. This wasn't pretend and Sam knew that. She wasn't a mom, though, so what did she know?

The rest was a blur. Until the pond burst into flame and the dead got drawn to it there was just fuzziness and movement. A gunshot, Rick screaming with Carl in his arms.

That's all there was, until the fire.

She had stood with Rick, with Aaron, Michonne, Carol, Olivia, countless others, attacking the dead that dare attack their home.

She remembered that, but she was glad she didn't have Daryl's photographic memory. She was happy to have everything just a little fuzzy, though the odd flashback attacked her for days, being able to forget was a god send.

* * *

 

Daryl had and hadn't expected what they found upon arriving home in equal measure. He knew the pull was strong, stronger even than that of Merle when he was in danger, and subsequently died and turned. No, this had been something else entirely. But he hardly expected the walls to have caved in, the loss of many of their people by other people and half the herd breaking trough in the space of two days.

He had searched out Evie, and found her back to back with Rick and Michonne, tearing walkers in two with a face like thunder. He needed to know what had gone down here, and he would, just as soon as the dead were dealt with.

One thing was for sure, he wasn't leaving her behind again. She'd said she'd be safe, and she was wrong. He had been right, yet again. He smirked as he thought how that would annoy her. She should be in his line of sight, always. He couldn't possibly imagine going on without her. He refused to think that it was even an option. There was only one way he could be certain she was safe.

She had run to him, thrown her arms around his neck, then backed off and smacked his shoulder with a clenched fist. He barely felt the blow, but he could feel the emotion behind it. Worry, relief, fear. They hit him harder an her tiny pale fist had.

"Where were you?!" She admonished, tears in her eyes and a mixture of anger, relief and sorrow pouring from her like smoke. He had grabbed her, pulled her close, breathed her in, and squeezed her tight.

"'M here now." He said quietly, savouring every ounce of her scent while he still could. "'M here, n we're together. Carl's gonna be ok. We're all gonna be alright"

They didn't want to leave the infirmary, had expected they'd keep a quiet vigil with Carl and Rick, with everyone, but Rick turned them away.

"There's gonna be a lot to do in the morning" he said quietly, calm despite the obvious relief he had at his son's prognosis, "I need you all to be fit and healthy, to help clean this up and block the walls. They'll need rebuilding. Maybe we can expand a little that way" his voice had become a little soft, far away, and Daryl thought perhaps the experience with Carl had been enough to turn Rick's mind a little. His fragrance had switched to something more breezy, still oaky, but younger.

"We c'n make it safe for now, block up the hole with the truck." Daryl said. He looked Rick in the eye. "Y'ok, man? Need anythin', at all, ya know where we are." Rick had nodded, grabbed Daryl's shoulder and squeezed it.

"We're good, I'm good." He turned back to Carl, the kids hand in his looking small and childlike. Carl looking vulnerable in the hospital bed. Daryl nodded back at Rick, before turning with Evie to leave.

* * *

 

Evie stopped on the porch, turning to Daryl sharply instead of reaching for the door.

"What happened?" She asked him, searching his face for any inkling before he spoke. He wasn't glowing as bright as she remembered, as though she'd made that up in her mind which was ridiculous, he'd only been gone a couple of days. "You've dimmed" she added, who dare dim your light? she wondered.

Daryl regarded her seriously a moment, as though he thought about what he might say to her. She hoped he wasn't going to lie, there was a strong sense that he was arguing with himself about whether to be honest. He dug a hand in his pocket and pulled out the battered pack of Morleys they'd been sharing, and shook a cigarette out for her. She looked at it, then looked at him .

"That bad?" She questioned, and he shook his head with a small smile.

"Nah, jus' thought ya might want one. Nothin' much happened. Got split from Sasha n Abraham by some jerks chasin' someone else entirely, then I found who they were after. They was on the run, n they took my shit to get on their way." Evie took he offered cigarette and twirled it in her fingers.

"Assholes" she muttered, taking his offered flame.

"Yeah" he gruffed back. "N the whole time they're tryin'a take my shit I got this pull, like when my bro needed me, but more. N it was comin' from here, from you." He turned and leaned on the porch railing, looking out into the dark and now quiet streets, still full of the monsters who had been given a second death. Evie puffed on her smoke and approached the railing beside him.

"Huh," she said, conversationally, "I felt the same thing."

"Never felt nothin' like that" Daryl said, not looking at her despite her staring at his profile. She watched him looking around the streets but not actually seeing any of it. She wondered where his mind really was.

"Never?" She asked

"Nah." Daryl sighed "not even from Merle, like I said. There's somethin', I dunno. It's weird." He threw his cigarette end out onto the road. Evie eyed him suspiciously, not sure what he had meant to say. She wanted to ask how he let them get away.

"Ya should get some sleep." He said, sounding to Evie like he had a lump in his throat, like he was holding something back. He all but flew into the house, and she understood that was the last word on the subject.


	44. Chapter 44

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More sexy time. Now they've started I don't think I'm going to be able to stop them!

Evie lay awake in bed, staring at the ceiling, too afraid to close her eyes. Every time she did she had a flash, a single image like a movie still. All of them black and white.

Sam surrounded by walkers tearing into him as his face screamed a silent yell of fear and pain, blood, bright white in these images, not obscuring her vision quite enough.

Jessie, swarmed and refusing to let go of Carl's hand.

Ron, his arms mid flail, with Michonne's sword poking from his chest.

Rick, running, Carl in his arms, floppy and unconscious.

Daryl, staring at her, a silhouette against a background of flames.

Daryl was sat on the floor, his glow clinging tightly to him, cleaning a gun in the dark as his light wasn't reaching as far as it should, and she listened to the metallic clicks and clunks as he did so. It was almost soothing. She wished she could sleep. Wide awake she remembered barely a thing from the night they'd had, but when she closed her eyes...  
She wondered if she'd ever manage to sleep again.

"How do you cope with a photographic memory?" she asked, staring at the ceiling still, rubbing subconsciously at the place she'd been struck by an arrow and should have died, not daring to even entertain the thought of the scratches she'd received on her arm. How much had Daryl seen? How much must he have to re see every damn moment.

"Gets easier" he said, a whisper in the dark. "It's bad, at first, but ya learn to tune it out." Evie wondered how that was at all possible.

"The memory is so fresh and bright." She stroked the invisible patch where a scar should have formed, but never had. Daryl didn't reply, and she wondered if this was just something else he didn't want to discuss with her tonight.

She sighed and went to turn onto her side, miserable in the face of all she wanted to unsee, and was stunned to see Daryl standing beside the bed, looking like he might get in.

* * *

 

"Compny?" Daryl asked her, she felt like she could do with some, and God knew he could too. It was going over and over in his mind, letting those dicks run off with his shit, and that sense of something other. Carl... While those pricks were screwing him over the kid had lost his damn eye.

He hated having a photographic memory, he wouldn't wish it on anyone, and he had openly lied to Evie that things get easier, they didn't, they never faded or drew back into the distance. They were stark and obvious, always. He just couldn't dwell on it. He'd not have got so far if he had.

She pulled back the duvet and shuffled back on the bed, and he removed his outer wear and climbed in beside her. She was completely naked, and she curled herself around him like a needy kitten. She was deliciously warm, and her fingers ran up and down his torso like feathers. He turned his face into her hair and sniffed purposefully. Her hand ran a little lower, grazing his pubis, and she hesitated where the hair was thicker, drawing a frustrated sigh from him.

She gave her own hum, a satisfied noise, and finally ran her hand over his dick and down to his balls. He closed his eyes, breathing her in again, his lips parting and his fangs descending with an audible swoosh.

Unbidden she climbed on top of him, head down, wrapping them in the thick curtain of her hair. He sat up and kissed her, his hands gentle on her back.

Everything was gone from his mind as he lost himself in her mouth, the losses, the challenges of the last few days, none of it mattered. Her and him, this bliss, this respite. He pulled her a little closer to him as she rubbed her bare ass on his hardening cock and groaned into his open mouth, gently, cautiously, she ran her tongue over the point of his extended canines.

* * *

 

She needed proof she was alive. Something to confirm that she was here and she was ok. Daryl hadn't expected it, as she wrapped herself around him he had jolted, stiffened, before relaxing into her.

Now he had her ass cupped in his hands and lifted her easily where he wanted her. Balancing her over the quivering tip of his dick, and just holding her, smiling while she squirmed.

"Don't tease" she whined, She wasn't in the mood for games. She wanted to fuck until she was so exhausted she didn't have the capacity think between closing her eyes and falling to sleep. She tried to convey that to him, she glared at him, his dark blue eyes on hers, narrow and serious, and he pulled her down, hard, on to his already pulsating cock.

"That what ya want?" He whispered aggressively, but Evie couldn't speak. She'd taken him to the hilt and the intense fullness was all consuming.

It wasn't that he was huge, but that sex with Daryl filled all of her senses with nothing but him. Someone could come into the room and she wouldn't know. There was just Daryl, and he was all she needed. All she knew.

He clawed at her butt as he forcefully rocked her back and forth on top of him, his eyes locked on hers, reaching deeper even than his nails. His lips parted, and his fangs glistened and she was telling him yes before he even asked her permission. He buried his teeth in to her right breast, and a muffled groan escaped him as he sucked at her. She let him have a moment, but soon pulled his head away so she could kiss him again, tasting her blood on his tongue. It was like having double the pleasure, his feelings and emotions melded with her own.

When he lifted her off, turning her over to all fours in a flash of movement she barely felt, she was glad. He positioned himself behind her, the the warm and pulsating head of his cock pausing at her slickness for just a second before he buried himself inside her wanting hole. She let out an involuntary noise before grabbing a pillow and biting into it.

There was no room for romance, but that was what she wanted. She pushed back against him, willing him to fuck her fast and hard, so the world could disappear in her blissful glowing exhaustion.

* * *

 

Daryl read every movement, every twitch and groan perfectly. He knew what she wanted, and why, but the darker side of him was enjoying the tease. When he flipped her over, much to her delight judging by the way she ramped her ass in the air and dipped her back just so, he couldn't help but just look at her, glistening and wet before him. He contemplated burying his face there, but decided instead to hit her hard and fast like she wanted.

He grabbed her hair in his fist and tugged, and had to close his eyes as she bit into a pillow to keep from being too loud. She squeezed her self around him and pushed back into his lap and he pulled her hair a little harder, before letting go and grabbing her butt cheeks, kneading them and pushing them up so he could watch his length gliding in and out of her.

There was still a little blood, and he growled as the scent hit him, looking away and grabbing at her waist instead.

Her thighs were quivering, and they were crashing so hard into each other that the bed head was rattling against the wall, and the bed springs were adding their own sound to the strange music, groaning and squeaking beneath their weight.

Evie let out a soft,

"Holy fuck"

And collapsed onto the bed. Daryl followed, more stylised, falling on top of her, but pressing little weight onto her prone and still twitching body.

He pulled her close, rolled them onto their side, and she fell asleep with him melting to softness inside her.

He spent the night inhaling her scent, thinking about soul mates for the thousandth time. Was there such a thing? He never would have entertained it, but as she slept, glowing gently in her comatose state, he couldn't help but believe it was a possibility.

* * *

 

Evie's hands were sweating inside the too large work gloves she was wearing. She dropped the feet of the walker she and Daryl were carrying on top of the rest of the dead in the wheelbarrow and swiped at her forehead with her forearm. It was hot, unseasonably so. The work was hard going, even without it, what with the little ache in her abs reminding her of the night before. She smiled to herself, but swallowed it down lest someone see. They hadn't found Deanna's body, she couldn't be caught smiling.

Daryl had grabbed the wheelbarrow's handles, and was waiting for her to catch up to him.

They were burning the twice dead at the farthest corner of Alexandria, away from houses, people. The unfortunate locals were being collected by others, and buried in the cemetery which Evie was worried would soon spill over onto the street.

The planned expansion may well be needed just for graves.

Clear up was taking the whole day, but it was good not to be living in fear of what clawed at the walls. Abraham and his construction buddies were working on the hole in the fence, the odd yell and clamour of tools drifting over. Glenn was digging graves with Father Gabriel and some other residents. Sasha was watching the fire didn't get out of control alongside Maggie while Rick watched Carl, and Carol watched Judith.

Watching the fire with Daryl by her side Evie was reminded of when she first found out about him. The night she met Rick, Michonne and Carl. The night she met Daryl's family. Watching the flames as Joe and his cronies burned, high on Daryl's blood and taking it all in her stride, like being a vampire was perfectly natural. She almost smiled again, and as she forced it back, again, she reached instead and put her hand on Daryl's bicep. He turned to her, a small smirk on his face, it told her he was thinking about the exact same moment.

The feeling coming from his was warm, grateful. She wondered what he was grateful for, but her thoughts were interrupted.

"Are there many more?" Maggie, not doing any of the heavy work on account of her pregnancy. The idea of kids sprung into Evie's mind for the first time in a long time. Whether she could have them with Daryl, whether she cared.

"Not many. Fire's gettin' kinda big, I know." Daryl answered as Evie got lost in her own thoughts.

"Maybe you could take them outside?" Maggie said, Evie was still staring at the flames.

"Nah, ain't goin' out, not yet." Evie's eyes shot to Daryl, the feeling coming from him dark and very telling. He'd mentioned what had happened, told Rick and everyone what he, Abraham and Sasha had been faced with. Sasha was nodding.

"Yeah, I don't think it's wise so soon after what we did" Daryl snorted

"What I did." He corrected.

"Let's not think about that" Evie tried, "we still have a lot to do here" the idea that a group of people could now be looking for revenge wasn't something she wanted to dwell on.

***

They decided that the few walkers left could be burned, added to the pile. Daryl and Evie volunteered to watch it over night, and they sat together, keeping an eye on the flames.

Carol had made them some dinner, and they had eaten in silence, the plates and cutlery now discarded beside them, glittering and twinkling in the amber light of the flames.

Evie crossed her legs in front of her and leant back on her hands. She looked at Daryl, sitting more stretched out, more relaxed than she expected.

All day he'd had something on his mind, he'd been far away. The emotion she was getting from him, in her head and her heart, was muted, more a simple darkness, grey stormy clouds, than a set emotion. It wasn't as clear as 'Daryl's happy' or 'Daryl is mad' it was odd, and not how she'd ever experienced his feelings before. It was all or nothing. Apart from that one grateful moment, now it was all shapes and colours.

"What's going on?" She asked him, and he sighed, visibly and mentally, she felt it like he was puffing those stormy grey clouds around in her head. She watched his profile and he sat a little straighter, though his eyes never left the flames. This was nothing like the night she met Rick, nothing at all.

"Those people, the guy n girl who took my stuff, n the gang on the bikes. They were connected." His voice was soft, but dark. Evie continued to watch him, waiting, and he knew it. He was drawing it out like some fantastic dramatic storyteller. It was working, she was pretty eager to hear more.

"How?" She asked eventually when he hadn't elaborated, trying to keep her voice low despite the frustration.

"I dunno" he said thoughtfully, and she believed him. It was easy enough to, he sounded so sincere, and the words came so casually. "They were bein' chased down, by bad people. They were the same people we ran into. They stank, Evie" he sniffed as if he could still smell them "it was bad. They were bad. N I think they're workin' for someone even worse." Evie screwed her face up and leaned forward.

"How bad are we talking?" She asked him seriously, and finally he turned to her. His eyes were dark and narrow, his face flat and serious.

"Real fuckin' bad" he said after a pause "It was all wrong. It smelled n felt so wrong. Shit's gonna hit, soon." Evie shook her head, got up and went to Daryl, kneeling in front of him as he turned back to the flames, still reaching several feet into the sky.

"So what can we do?" She asked him, trying to find his eyes with hers, searching his face for some inkling of what he wasn't saying. There was none, he was so very good at keeping a lid on things.

She hated that.

* * *

 

Daryl was reminded of when he told her what he was. She'd saved his life that night and he owed her the truth.

Sometimes it was good to have someone else know, someone he could discuss his instincts with without feeling foolish, but at other times he wished she didn't know anything. It was easier for him to lie. Now she searched his face for some answer he wasn't sure he had.

He just knew something wasn't right, but that was never enough for Evie.

"Ain't got all the answers" he huffed at her, slightly annoyed. He moved his head from her and flapped an arm so she'd get out of his space. "Jus' feels like somethin' bigger is all. N they ain't far, n they're gonna be out for vengeance for what I did. We gotta lay low for a while. Stay inside, bunk down."

Evie had sat back and he glanced in her direction, meaning to look and then look away, but his eyes caught the halo around her. The flames at her back lighting her hair in golds and oranges. She looked beautiful. 

"You're dimmer" she said. "And I know no one else can see it, but I think on some level they must feel it." She tilted her head to one side a little. "Don't lie to them. They don't need that. If It's not safe you have to tell them. Something doesn't feel right, you have to voice it. They trust you, I trust you." She straightened again. "We'll stay here a while, but we need to go out sooner or later." She shrugged "new people won't find themselves." Daryl snorted, and she frowned a question at him.

"Ain't lookin' for no more people" her mouth opened but he cut her off. "Those people who stole my bow, my bike, I offered 'em sanctuary, n they still did that. People out there ain't all like us. N I don't wanna end up bringin' someone here who's gonna run back n tell their people what we got. This Negan" he shook his head. "What fuckin' kinda name is that anyway?" Evie sat forward again.

"That what they called him?" He nodded, and hurrumphed his positive reply. "Ok. Let's... Let's try and think about something else for a while." She scooted next to him and wrapped her arms around one of his, holding him gently and laying her head on his shoulder to watch the flames which still climbed too high to be left alone.


	45. Chapter 45

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning if random alcoholism confession, but I promise it's not random and will mean something later in the series.  
> Trigger warning: mention of past alcoholism

A couple of days passed in relative peace. Carl was allowed out of the infirmary, and could be found in and around Alexandria retraining himself to do everything without depth perception.

Abraham and his team began work on the expansion in Deanna's last plans for the community.

Rick was soon on Daryl to help him, outside the walls. To find people and to find goods they could bring back to help build the community. Daryl was against it, and managed to stay inside the walls despite Rick's best efforts.  
Evie thought he should go, but Daryl always shot her down with excuses.

"We go, ya comin' with us. I go where you are." Was one of his favourites. She was never invited, and Rick was sure he was talking Daryl around.

Evie was pretty sure he wouldn't manage it.

On the third or fourth day, they began to meld one into the next, Evie approached Rick after breakfast.

She was about to knock on the door when it opened, and Rick stood before her looking ready and willing to face another day.

"Hey" he smiled at her and pulled the door to behind him, stepping into the porch with the smile still firmly on his face. He was a changed man. Evie hadn't seen this side of him until recently, and it was refreshing. Since Carl had pulled through his ordeal, Rick had had a new lease of life. This was the guy Daryl was so in awe of, and she could see why now.

"Hey" she replied, trying her own small smile at him. "I wanted to talk to you about Daryl, and... Going outside." Rick's smile faltered a touch, but he held it up, as Evie gave the last two words insincere gravity.

"Yeah? I'll get him out again, don't worry." Evie nodded. Perhaps, eventually, Rick would wear Daryl down, but it would take weeks because Daryl was as stubborn as a mule. "He won't watch people go hungry" Rick added as Evie squinted in the sun. She didn't doubt it, but she had an idea to get him out there sooner. She turned to face Alexandria, a place she now called home without a second thought. A place she needed to get away from.

"He'll go out if I do." She said quietly. "If I go on a run he'll be there right beside me." Rick leaned on the porch railings, cocking his head slightly to one side and straightening it again.

"There is that." He said quietly. "You sure you wanna be out there again?" Evie shrugged. She'd finally been getting some sleep, she was feeling better than she had for a long while. No one had been outside, except Carl, and she was pretty sure that Rick didn't know about that.

"Can't stay cooped up forever" she said thoughtfully. "We got everything we need here, but only for so long." She took a breath, deep and slow. "I don't want to get weak" she said carefully. "I don't want to fall into a false sense of security here. The world's still out there. It's still full of creatures and people that want us dead." She shrugged again, leaning on the railing next to Rick, and he turned his head to face her. "They're there now, they'll be there tomorrow, they'll be there next month. That won't change, but I don't want to either." She was thinking of Carol. She'd changed inconceivably. The woman who had blown up terminus was now quiet and happy to live in her role of housewife with Tobin. She baked cookies and made them all meals if she thought they needed it. She'd started smoking and spent hours on her porch just watching quietly, thoughtfully. She wasn't the woman Evie had met in the woods, she'd become the woman she'd pretended to be. Not weak, just different. She exuded an unhappiness Evie hoped she'd never feel in herself. A confusion of who she was and who she had become. Evie didn't want that for herself. She couldn't go back, like Carol had.

"I don't want to change." She confirmed. Rick nodded, turning away from her and straightening.

"Alright. You get him out, Maybe give him that little speech" he laughed a little, a beautiful sound to Evie's ears. "Maybe we'll suggest you come too, on a run" Evie smiled and watched as the rest of Alexandria began to get up and get ready for their day.

Maybe she wasn't the only one thinking of going outside. Abraham and Tobin were approaching, and they looked serious.

Evie left to the sounds of Abraham talking about ironwork they needed, and how he knew where to find it, outside.

It was time to move on from the tragedy of the wolves, of the herd, and get back to living life, not just waiting for each day to pass without incident. They had caught their breath. They didn't get to rest forever.

* * *

 

Daryl couldn't understand her need to get outside again. He could sense she was making her words up, spilling out of her mouth as they were without enough inflection to convince him otherwise.

"Ya wanna go out." He repeated her words at her carefully as they stood on their own porch watching the comings and goings as Alexandria began to wind down for the evening. Rosita stomped by to take guard duty, her whole demeanour furious, as it had been in the days since Abraham had left her for Sasha. Daryl watched her, following her with his eyes, waiting for Evie to reply.

"Yeah." Evie was trying to sound nonchalant, and Daryl guessed that to anyone else's ears she would have. Not to his, to him she sounded like she was trying too hard.

"Why?" He shook his head and shrugged a little as he asked, feeling petulant and moody, sounding like a pissed teen. It was a persona he'd almost shrugged off in the last couple of years, a side of him that harked back to roaming with Merle. He tried to straighten out the creases in his forehead as his face began to pull into a frown. He didn't want her out there, there was no need. That should be the end of it.

"I don't want to get too comfortable. I know you think there are bad people out there,"

"I know it"

"But we'll be together. I can't keep feeding you, Daryl, it's wearing me out. You need food and I need to get back to reality. We'll be careful, I'll do everything you say." He shot her a look at that, she'd never followed instruction well. He was being over cautious, he knew it but the knowledge didn't make him want to be less so.

"I'll go either way, but I think you should come too." Daryl narrowed his eyes at her, wondering what game this was. But he agreed, eventually.

He wasn't worried about running into anyone. That he could deal with easily, swiftly, and no one need know.

No. What he was most worried about was being spotted, watched, followed, and inadvertently leading possible hostiles home.

But he relented. He had a feeling there was more to Evie's story than just his bloodlust, and her need for, what did she call it? 'Reality'

Definitely more.

They made a plan to leave at first light, so went pretty much straight to bed.

***

"I was a drunk." Daryl narrowed his eyes at Evie,

"Huh?" They'd been out an hour, he'd hunted a little, free to use his speed and sharp eyes at will, thankfully. It'd be pretty hard to eat if they were still on the road, he realised. No crossbow, and his family all watching, he rubbed at the back of his neck, a habit more than a need. Evie shrugged her shoulders a little, looking sheepish. He was hoping he'd misheard her, but he knew he hadn't.

She didn't act like a drunk, he pictured bob in his mind, clutching desperately to a bottle he had saved from being trampled by walkers, almost at the detriment of himself, Daryl, Michonne. Not caring a jot for the welfare of those back at their then home, the sick and the dying. It made him angry just remembering how enraged he had been. Furious with the pathetic excuse of a man Bob had been.

He had changed though. The devil in the drink left his system eventually.

He couldn't smell drink on her, never had. It lasted, that smell. Clinging especially closely to those that drank a lot.

"What're ya talkin' 'bout?" He asked her, slightly worried at this odd confession, but not knowing what he could do about it.

They were continuing to walk, hoping to find a clear and open space for Evie to do some shooting, Daryl didn't understand why she couldn't just train from the wall like everyone else, or take target practice from the new tower.

"Everyone always asks what you did before." She said quietly, looking at the ground and clearly avoiding Daryl's eyes. He watched her carefully as she bit her lip self consciously. She was bearing her soul, he stopped walking and she stopped too. Something about this felt pretty serious, and again a worry rippled through him. It wasn't his feeling, but hers.

"I was a drunk." She managed, stopping next to him and looking out into woods. "I drank to sleep, I drank to wake up. Life was shit and it looked better when it was all kind of..." she waved her hand in the air "hazy." Daryl felt his eyes widen. She was telling the truth. Her scent grew a little stronger as her face pinked across the cheeks, and she lowered her eyes again.

"Hey, ain't no need to relive this shit." She huffed a little laugh, not much more than a puff of air which cause her heady fragrance to assault his senses. She was embarrassed and ashamed. "That why ya wan'ed to come out here? Tell me y'old secrets?" Evie looked at him then, finally looked up and met his gaze.

* * *

 

"No." Evie didn't know why she was being honest with Daryl when she'd made stupid excuses to both him and Rick already. Shit, she'd even lied to herself, pretending none of this ever happened.

That was, she did. Until.. she daren't even think it.

"I was getting like that again, back there, bored and sad. Itching for a drink." She eked out the words as best she could. One by one, slowly. "I'm a better person since the world fell down, can you believe that?" She smiled a little, as if the question was funny. It wasn't funny.

She sighed and pushed her unruly hair from in front of her face, where it had fallen as she faced the ground shamefully. She waited for some disapproving look or, even worse but altogether more fitting, a feeling of disappointment to penetrate her from him. She tensed up and waited for it but it never came.

"I needed to get out, and get grounded again." Silence, heavy with thought and tension, came back to her. She waited.

"I can believe it" Daryl said. She took a breath, a sigh of relief. "Ya wanna drink?" He asked her, one eyebrow cocked deep into his hairline, his head lilting to one side. Evie swallowed hard, really thinking about her answer, before shaking her head gently.

"No. Not want." Daryl nodded, a single shallow dip of his head, as if that was enough for him.

"Ya don't need it" he said simply, and began to move again. Evie huffed exasperated. She kept telling herself that, made no difference. She never got as far as AA, she didn't know 'the steps', she had her own coping strategies.

"Ya never said nothin'" Daryl accused her, as if it was something all people gave up for fun, mid conversation.  
'Oh, just by the way, I'm an alcoholic. I drink because my parents didn't love me, I drink because I can't sleep, I drink because I don't want to sleep. I drink because I like being drunk, because then I don't remember. I hate to remember'

She sure did hate remembering.

"What do you want me to say?" She asked aloud. "I wanted to come out because I was getting antsy in there. There's nothing left for me but to drink when I'm stuck behind those walls." She tried to calm herself down, knowing she was shouting. "I can't drink out here. I can't. It's too dangerous." Dary was shaking his head, and she stopped talking. There was a small smile on his face and an air of disbelief about him. She felt like laughing, and knew instantly that was him, not her. She didn't find any of this amusing in the slightest.

_Oh little sister, why did you say anything? Look at him, laughing at you_

"Ya know, I always thought it went the other way, that this new world order would make people drink" Still that air of humour, which just made Evie angry.

"I don't know what's so funny, Daryl!" He turned to her, stormed to her

"Ain't laughin'"

"Not out loud. You think this is easy for me? I lay in bed every night and close my eyes and see horrible things, awful things, and all I want to do is drink them away. Sitting there watching Abraham downing half bottle after half bottle of scotch. I envied him, Daryl. Do you have any idea how that makes me feel?" Daryl was still a little close for comfort, standing well within her personal space and glaring at her like that might make it all go away. This sucked, and she hated that she'd lied to everyone for so long. She owed them the truth. Daryl had no idea who she really was, and that was unfair on him.

But she still hadn't got to her point.

"I haven't had a drink. As much as I want to." Daryl squinted at her, she wondered if he could feel just how worked up she was getting.

He shrugged, shook his head, still in her space and trying to intimidate, like that was his answer for everything, brutality. Evie actually took a step back, "I go on despite everything."

"Despite everythin'? Ya think I give a shit ya used to drink? Ya think I care how hard it is not to? Fuck, Evie, now ain't the time to be havin' no relapse." Evie ducked away from him, his words harsh and sharp and launched at her like throwing knives. She flinched and he noticed, relaxing his stance a little.

* * *

 

He was frustrated. Why was she telling him this shit? What purpose did it serve? He felt bad, she was opening up to him, it was right she was honest, but alcohol? Relapse? Not now, this wasn't what they needed. When Beth wanted to drink, that was different. Entirely.

"People're relyin' on us" he said quietly, forcing himself to relax and to stop flying off the handle. It wasn't as if she was asking to go for a drink now. She wasn't a 17 year old blond who'd just lost her dad, possibly her sister. Her whole life as she knew it. They were stable, they had people around them.

"What are they relying on?" Evie asked him, dragging him from the pictures in his head. "No one's going out. We're stagnant. If I can abstain from drinking, just one day at a time, you can come out here with Rick and look for people" there it was. He straightened, though he was unaware when he had leant so far forward into her space again.

"That was this is? Those two things ain't the same Evie." She had the audacity to huff a small laugh, humourless and irritating, flinging her sent and her anger over him.

He gritted his teeth against the sensory assault, and backed off as though it would help. Now with several feet between their bodies she seemed more at ease. He wondered if he'd frightened her, but just couldn't feel it over the anger.

"They're the same" she spat. "More bodies, more survivors. Numbers are what we need."

"Ain't the same." He shook his head "What the hell has it got to do with ya wan'in' a drink? I am protectin' that place from assholes, ya din't see what I saw. Y'ain't gotta clue what ya talkin' about." He hitched his rifle on his shoulder, tempted to storm off, though leaving her was not something he'd do lightly.

"Explain this to me. Make it clear to me how the hell these things are connected" Evie took a deep breath, as though she was preparing to tell him in no uncertain terms, but she shook her head and turned away from him, taking small and quiet steps into the trees.

He watched her go for a second, until she disappeared behind the thick trunk of an old Black Walnut tree, and his cool drained from him in the simple act of not having her in his line of sight.

He followed her, rounding the tree in several steps, and couldn't see her anywhere. All there was in the air was a smell he couldn't quite place, it was neither good or bad, and an intense feeling of fear and confusion.

Then he heard the growling.


	46. Chapter 46

 Evie rounded the large tree in front of her slowly, wary of lurking walkers which could be hiding in the shadows. Coming face to face with an animal instead was a bit of a shock, especially when that animal was a large greeny, oily, black alligator.

Her first instinct was to just freeze, but she fought it, knowing she should run directly away from the 11foot threat. Her mind started talking nonsense, asking her why the hell it was there, in Virginia, and why it was just hanging out so far from water. Obviously it was an escaped zoo tenant, and it's here because the zookeeper had stopped feeding him, she thought, while at the same time sweat stood out on her head and neck and she cursed her stupid mind for asking inane pointless questions when she was panicking.

She couldn't fathom why she didn't just call for Daryl, sure she was angry at him, but he could help in a nano second. No. Instead she turned and began to climb the tree she'd rounded, despite knowing that alligators could climb. Very well.  
It had been a whole two seconds, when the alligator charged and she found her self kicking her feet at it as it tried to climb up behind her. She cursed herself, profusely, and scrambled higher as the creature tried to find footing. She dared to look around her and saw Daryl down below.

The alligator growled, a huge bellow that rumbled her whole body, and she could swear the tree was vibrating with it, too. She whimpered a little, not wanting to freak the alligator out any more than it already was by yelling back, even though her head was telling her to do so, loudly.

Of all the ways she thought she would die after the dead rose, by alligator had never been one of them.

If she could just stop panicking for a second, she could pull out her gun and shoot the bastard in the eye, but she was gripped with a fear so strong she thought she might be sick with it. Walkers she could cope with, random Dino-like reptiles were clearly not her strong point.

"Fuck, _Evie_." She heard below her, but didn't bother looking down, the beast in front of her was still looking for purchase and footing to reach its tasty snack, and she was too worried about being eaten to give a shit what Daryl thought of her stupidly disappearing around a tree.

She kicked out again, aiming for the side of the alligators head and praying it didn't open its jaws, when it suddenly disappeared. She was sure she hadn't even connected with it, and moved her body, precariously balanced on a high branch, to look below. The alligator was dead. Daryl looked none the worse for wear, but the creature had been all but gutted. She wondered how, she wondered if she cared other than the fact that she was alive.

* * *

 Daryl had come to his senses in an instant, grabbing the growling beast by the tail and dragging it from the tree, punching it in the side of the head as it hissed at him, before splitting its belly wide open.

Evie looked down from the tree, a little green around the gills but otherwise ok. He cursed under his breath, what the fuck were they doing? They shouldn't have been outside, and they shouldn't have to fight giant overgrown fucking lizards either.

"Ya comin' down?" He asked her, looking around to make sure the 'gator was a loner. Social animals, alligators, and the knowledge not only surprised him, (where had he heard that, he wondered?) but it worried him, too. Evie hadn't made her way down straight away, and he felt himself getting irritated with her. "Evie. Get down here!" He hissed through gritted teeth, barely withholding from just diving on the gator guts. Unexpected enemies or not, he and Evie hadn't finished their conversation.  
She finally dropped down in front of him, landing in an awkward crouch.

"I haven't lost my mind," she said quietly, "that was an alligator, right?" Still gritting his teeth Daryl rolled his eyes.

"Don't change the subject" Evie gaped at him, stunned.

"Don't change the... Daryl this is the only subject. Gators? Maybe in Georgia! I'm starting to change my mind and think you were right, it is too dangerous out here." But Daryl was still confused about her previous confession, and with the threat dealt with, he still wanted answers.

"That night at the church, we drank communion wine." Evie shook her head defiantly.

"No, _I_ didn't. I dragged you outside to talk about Eugene." Daryl closed his eyes to picture it all more clearly.

"Ya had a glass'a red n ya got giddy, I got a photographic memory, Evie. Ya can't bullshit me" Evie gave a laugh, a single syllable without humour.

"Well, you're no good at remembering what you _didn't_ see, are you? Have you ever seen me with an empty glass? Ever seen me actually take a sip? Why the hell did you think I wanted to get out of that church, Daryl? It was everywhere, and I could hear it calling my name, I had to go." Daryl shook his head at her, he couldn't work it out. He was sure she was woozy at the church. He tried to remember the spaghetti meal they had at Aaron and Eric's, and if she'd drank her wine there. She certainly didn't drink a whole glass. So, maybe... "I kept telling myself I was giddy from the wine, when I got hit by that car, I told myself it didn't hurt because I was drunk. Had to be drunk, I had a couple sips and hadn't eaten properly for a week." Evie gave the dead alligator a disinterested look, and huffed, frustrated.

"I thought if I told myself I was drunk, no one would know" Daryl narrowed his eyes at her. That didn't make any sense. If she didn't drink no one would know, surely. He was so sure he knew her, and the realisation he'd been lied to stung, that he'd been fooled was unforgivable. Still thoughts of Bob and Beth assaulted him.

"Why're ya tellin' me all this? Of all the things that matter now, this ain't one of 'em"

* * *

  Evie swallowed and looked at Daryl, who was getting angrier and angrier by the second. The more they dived into this conversation the more she wished she had just kept her mouth shut.  
"Because I love you" she said quietly, feeling stupid

"because I think you should know. Because I brought you out here to keep me from reverting back to that." She sighed and felt her eyes filling up and she hated herself for it, and her stupid body for betraying her now. She looked at the ground. "You ever think, maybe, you just didn't want to see it?" There. There was another conversation they'd not had. She put her fists in her hair and rolled her eyes, grunting angrily. The whole point of this was to get him out again, prove he could go out and recruit and everything might be ok, now she was confessing her sins to the one man who may be the guy she wanted to spend her life with, the one guy who perhaps might be her soulmate.

And he wasn't talking. He was looking at her like she was stupid, and the plan hadn't gone how she intended because her mouth liked to run away with her.

_"I was a drunk"_

What she was, was a dick. Irresponsible, hasty, and possibly slightly damaged. She looked again at the alligator, and tried really hard to hold everything together. Her brain was threatening to make her burst into tears, and she was desperate not to. She was pathetic.

"Look" she managed, squeezing the tears away with a blink of her eyes. "I needed to get out, that's what it comes down to. You need to realise that you should be coming out, too. That's why we're here. That's what this is." She let her hands drop to her sides and looked at Daryl, standing in front of her, hands on the strap of the rifle over his back. He looked a little forlorn at the realisation that Evie wasn't what she seemed, he was staring at the ground around his feet. She could feel his confusion, and didn't know what to do with that feeling.

"Maybe we should just go back." She conceded. She'd messed up. Freya was cursing her in her head, bug she paid her dead older sister no mind.

* * *

 Daryl was going over what she'd said. Not wanting to see it. Hadn't he thought they had some connection, that they could be, for want of a better word, soulmates? There was something about her from the start he'd never managed to put his finger on, and now she confesses her alcoholism to him, and he never once suspected it.

What it had to do with him being out here, he still was none the wiser, but he was outside, and though the alligator was an interesting twist, no one had died.

"I'll go" he said eventually, not looking at her but feeling her all the same, the worry, the deflated feeling of giving in. "Me n Rick'll go out. Whatever." He looked up, and she was watching his every move. "It's good I know, about the drink, n maybe we should come out more often. I shouldn't be usin' ya to sustain me, that ain't fair." He hitched the rifle, which wasn't slipping, and wished he had a cigarette so he could do something with his hands to distract himself. Her green eyes were wide and worried, and he could feel how angry she was at herself. "Ain't goin' back, not yet. Ya wanna be out here, that's what we'll do. Can't have ya fallin' back to the drink." He shrugged "its good I know, I c'n keep an eye on ya, if that's what ya want. " Evie shrugged, looking a little shy.

"I've done ok. It gets hard when it's quiet. Worse when bad things happen but mostly... it was always just something to do" she shook her head and shrugged again. "Watching Sam, Jessie... and every time I closed my eyes. Over and over and over"

"I know." Daryl cut her off before she could go too far down that road. "I know ya weren't sleepin', makes it even more unfair that I been feedin' offa ya." Daryl scuffed his booted toe in the dirt. "Was thinkin' maybe I could have at this gator n then we'll go n see what we see." Evie frowned at him, and he avoided her gaze. He felt bad that he didn't know about all of this, but everyone was wrapped up in walkers and bad guys. No one was looking around so close to home for danger.

"Really?" She asked him, her voice light, and hopeful, as though he'd just accepted everything. He hadn't, he was still confused as to why he didn't realise earlier, doubting himself hard, but she wanted him to know, and that was something.

"Yeah. I love ya too Evie, every last broken, bruised, messed up bit'a ya." He shrugged and knelt beside the Alligator "now if ya don't mind, this shit's jus' sittin' here goin' to waste, so..."

* * *

 Evie was surprised by how much Daryl ate. He offered her something, but she declined, feeling sick to her stomach just watching him devour the alligator's internals. Eventually he calmed down, having eaten his fill, and they moved on. They didn't speak, but Evie felt there was very little tension between them. It was easy, quiet, amiable.

They came upon a clearing eventually, a wide open space with a few trees and bushes dotted around. Evie had packed some trash for target practice, bottles, a broken plate, some plastic hubcaps, but Daryl had his own ideas.

"Not often ya target is standin' perfectly still" he said, handing her the rifle from his back. It felt too big in her hands, she was used to handguns and knives, but she weighed it up, bringing it to her eye and checking the sight.

"Elbows in" Daryl grunted beside her, and she obliged, having to adjust her footing to better balance herself. There was a hum of approval beside her, and she relaxed a little. "Yer a natural. Relax that left hand into somethin' looser." She tried to do so, not entirely sure what he meant, then his hands were on the rifle too. He stood close behind her and re-positioned her hand, his skin hot on hers, then checked the stock in her shoulder. She could smell him, all autumn leaves and cold blue skies despite his warmth. He seemed brighter, more himself. She heard him sniff at her hair and goose flesh sprung out on her arms beneath her jacket sleeves. She must have bristled a little, or some shiver must have run through her that he felt and she didn't, as he let out a breath and moved away.

It wasn't a cold day, but without him so close she felt a sudden draft.

"Gonna flush out somethin', wait here, don't take ya eye from that rifle." And with that she felt him breeze away, literally a small soft blow and he was gone, 100 yards in the distance. She could just see the bushes moving and put her eye to the sight, convinced she'd hit nothing but air, worrying she could even shoot Daryl. She was nervous, terrified of the power in her hands despite shooting a hundred times before. Something about the rifle was different from the handguns she favoured.

She heard an almighty squeal, and tried not to jump too hard in her skin with the weapon in her hands and Daryl somewhere in front of her, unseen. There was another rustle and a big brown pig came dashing out from the shrubbery. She let out a breath, and squeezed the trigger, sure the hog was gone, it was so fast.

There was another squeal, and she didn't dare look up from the sight.

"Ya got it" Daryl said, no louder than speaking volume though it reached her perfectly. She lowered the rifle, breathing hard, she could still hear the pig squeaking and grunting. She began walking forward and saw Daryl pulling out Beth's knife, taking it to the pig's throat and slitting it in one slice. She gasped, and he turned.

"Ya din't quite kill it, but that was a great shot. Wanna try again?" Evie looked at the blood soaking into the ground as it gently slowed its gushing, sluggishly dribbling from the creatures jugular. She shook her head, unable to tear her eyes away.

Pigs weren't her forte, either, it seemed.

 


	47. Chapter 47

Evie wasn't sure why she was suddenly so squeamish. On a separate run a few days later she asked Daryl how he managed it all the time.

"Your blood doesn't bother me." She said conversationally, her feet on the dash of the small car they'd taken, picking through a slightly soft bag of chips. She held the packet out to him, and he shook his head with a grimace. "But," she continued, swallowing a mouthful of food. " but, I can't seem to come to terms with shooting animals." She shrugged, turning the bag on end to scrape out the last of the crumbs.

"Ya kill walkers" Daryl replied, giving her legs a disapproving look. "If we crash ya kneecaps're gonna shoot straight through ya face" Evie begrudgingly put her feet on the floor and shifted in her seat.

"Walkers aren't cute, nor do I intend to eat them. How do you do it?" Daryl shrugged, and she watched his hands on the steering wheel. One of them automatically lifted with his shoulder action.

"Well, ya have no choice. N it don't taste like it did before. Ya know that." Evie turned and looked out the window in the passenger door. She didn't know, though. She'd tasted him and it was magical, though the thought made her a bit green - the romance of that phrase - but there was no other word for it. It was like licking god himself. She smiled to herself, preferring the analogy. She'd have to run that one by Gabriel.

"We're here" Daryl said, slowing the car and pulling to a stop. "What's funny?" Evie turned to him and shook her head, her hair bouncing around her shoulders.

"Nothing. This is it?" They'd pulled up to a couple shop fronts, what looked like a mechanics work shop and filling station, a diner next door.

"Yeah" Daryl got out of the car and took a quick look around before dipping his head back in. "C'mon, 's'safe 'nuff." Evie grabbed her pack and got out, too, gently shutting the car door and having a look around. Daryl produced a sheet of paper from his pocket. More pretence, she thought, Daryl didn't need a list other than the words in his head.

"Car batteries, fuel, n anythin' else that looks useful." He screwed the list up and shoved it in his jeans pocket. Evie wondered why he even got it out in the first place. Habit, maybe, just being so keen on appearing human.

"Then this _is_ the place." She agreed, looking at him sideways and heading for the workshop.  
She stopped by the entrance and turned to face him opposite her, so they were either side of the entry way.

"There'll be a shutter door round back" He said gravely, "we should check there first. Guys mighta been workin' when it went south, n fled. Might be a yard, or some shit." He reached out gingerly and tried the main customer door, and it stood fast. If that door was locked, Evie supposed the back would be shut up tight, too, but Daryl had already made his way around her, so she followed, with her knife held up.

Daryl wasn't wasting any time. He was already reaching the back fences as she rounded the building. There was a large sliding wooden gate, padlocked from the outside. Evie was mildly surprised, at first, but of course, someone could have already claimed the place as their own.

She looked at the padlock closely, it was old, dirty, not shiny and new, or particularly worn with much handling. That was something, she supposed, but she'd learnt that you couldn't take anything for granted, not since the end of the world.

"What now?" She all but mouthed at him, and he rattled the gate the on its wheels in reply. Something big and heavy threw itself at the gate then, and a moan filtered through towards them.

Shit.

How many? Were the shutters closed or open behind the gate? So many questions, every time they just wanted to stock up, they couldn't just head out and get what they needed without the questions. She rolled her shoulders, trying to limber up a little, she'd gone stiff when the walker, which sounded big, threw itself at the gate, rattling it heavily in its frame, the padlock and heavy chain rattling along too.

* * *

 

Daryl was looking for a knothole in the wood, somewhere he could see through, see if there was even a gate or shutter door back there.

When his quick search didn't yield the results he wanted he looked at the height of the fence, 10 feet. It was scalable, shit he could do it in one leap if wanted.

There could be cars, there could be a herd, there could be everything they needed in this one hit. He looked up at the fence again, before leaping up to grab the top with his hands, dragging himself up and hoping the grip on his boots what's still vaguely usable.

He wondered himself why he bothered in front of just Evie, but the lie was more believable when he acted like he believed it himself.

His grip was fine, and he scaled the fence like an amateur climber more than a vampire. Once he could see he took stock of the situation and dropped himself back to the ground. It was good, shutters shut tight, two walkers in the yard, the big bastard in overalls and still carrying a hefty looking wrench.

Though it did beg the question, who the hell locked the gate? There was no warning on the outside, no hastily spray painted message. He frowned and turned to Evie who was waiting for answers. He jutted his chin towards the front of the workshop again and they made their way back around.

He measured her carefully with his eyes as they stood by the front door. She was mildly apprehensive, but that was to be expected.

"We've no idea what's in here" he said to her, as if she'd never done this before. "I'll go in and do a sweep," Evie was shaking her head and he stopped, looking at her with a frown.

"We should go together" she said with a small shrug of her shoulders. "There's no point in you going in and coming back to get me. I've got your back, Daryl." He wanted to laugh at that, but knew she'd be offended. She had his back, it was kinda funny.

"A'ight." He nodded "I'll go first, though, cause I'm immune to the bites." Evie gave him a smile and rolled her eyes as he reached for the door and pounded his fist against it.

Nothing came back at first, but Daryl held a single finger up at Evie as he felt her relax a little. Now was no time to be getting hopes up, and he felt Evie's rising, already.

Unless she just enjoyed being out that much, there was that, used to the danger and with life in Alexandria fairly mundane, he could see how being out there could excite her.

She was all but vibrating where she stood, glowing softly, eyes bright, hair brighter. She bounced on her feet like a boxer, and her eagerness could easily rub off on him if he let it.

He couldn't let it. If he got sloppy it would be a whole world of pain for them both. He'd almost lost her enough the past month or two. No point risking anymore of his shit, he'd had enough of losing out to this cruel new world.

It was time to go in. Knowing the wrench carrying asshole was out back wasn't exactly comforting. He was also thinking of walker hiding places there could be. Toolboxes, scissor lifts, filing cabinets. Shit, there could be an office and a washroom, too. Hiding places, darkness, closed doors and dusty corners. He clenched his jaw and gave Evie a nod, and she pulled a hair pin out of her pocket, and bent it around before getting to work on the lock.

She'd shown an affinity for lock picking when they were on the road, but the hairpin was new.  
Daryl kept his eyes and ears around them, all too aware that the padlock on the back gate had been on the outside.

"There" Evie whispered triumphantly, "ready?" She asked him, and he flexed his fingers around the knife handle in his hand, nodding once as she stepped aside to let him push the door inwards.

It was cool and dark inside, it smelled like dust and death, like everywhere else, but with the overlying tinge of grease and oil. It was familiar, almost homely to Daryl. He breathed deep, letting the fragrance fill him, feeling like an old friend.

The door clicked into its frame behind him, he had never worked out if it was better or worse to have the door closed. Sure, nothing could get in, but it was also that extra second to get out.  
Too late to worry now, it was done.

He raised his knife a little and crept forward into the murky darkness of the windowless workshop.

* * *

 

Evie stopped bouncing from foot to foot and turned her head to look around her. If recent history taught them anything it was that danger could be lurking absolutely anywhere.

She looked deeper into the building, her breath trying to speed up because she could no longer see Daryl in the darkness, why did these places never have any windows? Being so attached to him made her feel a bit pathetic, but after so long, fighting it was stupid. She loved him. She needed him. So be it.

She tried to steady her breathing and walked tentatively forward, eyeing a large toolbox-taller than her-as she passed it, wondering if it might not be time to get the torches out. It was so dingy, and though she could now just make Daryl out as he strolled along in front of her with his stupid perfect vision and moon like ethereal glow, she was very uncomfortable in the dark.

She'd never been afraid of it as a kid, but times change.

She reached into her pocket to pull out the small mag-lite, lowering her knife as she did so, having to fiddle as her jeans were skin tight. They'd obviously been doing well in Alexandria.

She heard the toolbox, now behind her, creak, most likely settling, she thought, abandoning her quest to pull out the torch and turning around.

"Hey" Daryl had heard it too, but she waved him off.

"I'm good" she hissed back at him, pulling her knife up and flapping her free hand at him, no idea if he was watching.

She put her back against the tool box, ad it moved on castor wheels, squeaking as it did so. She grouped her teeth in a humourless smile, and waited, cringing.

Then the withered moan came, a growl that sounded stunted, not like she'd heard before.

"Evie?" Daryl's concern aggravated her a little, but if he felt about her the way she did about him, then how could she blame him?

The grumble came again, and she edged around to the side of the grimy blue box, she had a feeling the walker was the opposite side, and she braced her hands on the cool but sticky metal and shoved the box into the wall. She grunted as she did so herself, but there was a satisfying squelch as well as a thud. The grunting stopped, and Evie was rather proud of herself.

"Ha" she exclaimed, shoulders aching from the effort. She grabbed her torch without struggle this time and shove it along the wall, picking out the blood, brain matter, bone and skin on the back wall. "Awesome" she whispered, turning in Daryl's direction. "Did you see that?"

"Yeah," Daryl said, not sounding nearly proud enough. "I saw, shine that light over here n help me find some batteries." She did as asked, shining the light over his shoulder, though she knew he didn't need it. He was standing in front of a row of shelves, all stacked with different parts, and bits of parts.

"There" she pointed, seeing a handful of batteries on one corner. "How do we know if they work?" She asked as Daryl hefted one down. More pretence. They were heavy, maybe for her or anyone they knew, but not for him.

"We don't." He said, standing and grabbing at another. "We'll take a few."

His head snapped around then and he pulled his gun from its holster. Evie, taken aback, couldn't work out what was happening, until the car they'd driven out in tried to start up outside.

* * *

 

Evie darted toward the door and Daryl grabbed her roughly, pulling her back. She was too flighty.  
"I'll take point" he whispered huskily, shuffling her behind him, much to her dismay. "Draw ya gun."

They walked quickly to the door, Daryl pushed it open with his back, throwing out feelers to sense for danger. Nothing immediately came back to put him on edge, but the fact they were stealing the car wasn't exactly disarming him.

"Hey!" He called, the door only open a couple of inches so he could spy through the crack. He heard someone cursing, female, she had her hair tied in a blond ratty ponytail on top of her head.

"I need the car!" She yelled, not turning to him, but backing to the trunk. She was going to see if there was anything she could use, maybe take a little cover back there. She had a machete strapped to her leg.

"Leave" he grunted, hoping she'd see sense and would go. Evie, beside him, shuffled her feet a little.

"Great opportunity to prove to Rick..." she said, trailing off.

"She's tryin'a steal our car, y'any idea how long it'll take to walk home?"

"I need the car" the blond said again, opening the trunk, and all but diving inside. She was tiny, petite, and Daryl wondered how she'd survived without any sort of weight or size behind her.

"Ya need to leave" Daryl pushed the door a little wider, poking his hand gun through the gap. He couldn't see her, though he felt she was frustrated.

He watched a little longer, and eventually she appeared around the side of the car closest to him. He realised she couldn't reach to shut the boot lid. He chuckled to himself, earning him a narrow look from Evie.

"She gotta gun?" Evie whispered, and Daryl shook his head at her, shooting an arm out to hold her back before she barged past him.

"Y'aint goin' out there."

"She's just a kid," Evie argued. "Look at her, she probably can't even drive" Daryl shook his head.

"Oh, but she can hot wire a car? We don't know how many of 'em there are." Evie shrugged, and he felt a wave of arrogance come from her.

"Does it matter?" He narrowed his eye at her, sure he understood but not sure how to take it.

"Ya gotta get it outta ya head that I'm some invincible hero. My brother died, Evie. Ya gotta take risks, I get that, but I ain't fuckin' superman." He turned away from her, hoping the argument was done, wanting to see what the blond was up to.

She was rooting through the car, all the doors now standing open as she rifled through their stuff. There were no tell tale bulges on her body, and he was sure there was no concealed weapon. Still, she was bold and brash for a tiny slip of thing on her own. He tried to scent her, but Evie bristling beside him was all he could sense.

"I'm goin' out, ya got my back or're ya gonna try n be a damn hero?" Evie didn't answer, but she didn't need to. He pushed the door, announcing himself as he did so. The woman turned to him, and he saw she wasn't a kid, Evie was wrong. She was about forty, streaks of grey were obvious in her hair.

"Ya take the car n then what?" Daryl said as he approached her, gun up, taking almost side on steps. "It'll only get ya so far."  
The woman turned to him, looking stern and stoic.

"Do it" she said, walking towards him. "Please, shoot me. I can't do this anymore"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING:
> 
> There will, from now, be references of alcoholism and PTSD. 
> 
> Read with caution, my lovelies.


	48. Chapter 48

* * *

_You'll be the last one standing...You're gonna miss me so bad when I'm gone, Daryl  
Dixon._

Daryl was reeling at the images in his head, and he had to fight them off. It wasn't the same, it wasn't the same. By the time she died Beth was strong. Not like this... this woman.

The similarities weren't lost on him, of course they weren't, blond, small, suicidal. But that was before, shit, long before. Back at the farm when no one had any idea what they were dealing with.

Then the hanging walker.

So many similarities.  
He came to his senses enough to see Evie moving forward, her arms up, palms out to show she wasn't armed. Why the fuck was she no longer armed?

She was talking, to this pointless woman who had given up.

"We're not going to kill you" she said "we can help you. We have a community, a therapist," she turned back to Daryl and tried to gesture him forward with her eyes.

"She's suicidal, Evie. We don't need that at home. 'S'dangerous." He jutted his chin at the woman as Evie gaped at him incredulous. She was offended by his writing the woman off, he could feel it.  
"Ya gonna take the car, why bother? Just walk into a herd n ya done." Evie's face was an absolute picture. Daryl would never talk like this to anyone else, but the woman was a stranger, she probably just wanted sympathy, or to disarm them and take their shit.

He weren't losing anymore shit, he'd already decided.

"I tried" the woman said bitterly. "I tried and I couldn't. I fought them off, every time."

"So ya want someone else to carry the guilt a doin' it for ya?" Daryl sneered. He didn't buy it. She didn't give off the sort of vibe he'd expect from someone who wanted to die. If she wanted it that badly she'd have found a way.

"Ignore my friend" Evie said pointedly. "We want to help, we do."

"You can't" the woman said aggressively. "Everything and everyone is gone, and I'm all alone, living with the guilt of a million sins that I'll never manage to undo." Evie dropped her arms to her sides, a sadness wafted over Daryl like a warm breeze. There was no comfort in it.

"It's not over." Evie said quietly. "We've all done bad things. How you deal with that is what's important now." The woman faced the floor, her blond pony tail swinging forward on her head.

"I'm dealing with it fine. There's a quarry not far from here full of walkers, I'll drive the car in and be done" she looked up again, and her face was fully determined.

"If the fall doesn't kill you?" Evie started, but Daryl cut her off.

"Quarry's all but empty. We cleared it. Walkers're gone" the woman's face dropped, like Daryl had just taken the last shred of what she owned. He wondered if he looked the same when D and his bitch had stolen his stuff.

Probably not, he still had Evie, his family, Alexandria. This woman literally looked like she had nothing, and now Daryl had taken away the dignity she thought she'd find in death.

An anger assaulted him, and he looked at Evie, but it wasn't her.  
The woman's eyes, he saw now they were a chocolate brown, flared. As the similarities caved, shattered around him as he stared into those brown eyes -not blue- , her rage rose higher, and he could see that Evie could feel it too.

* * *

 

If Evie had been asked later what had happened, she wouldn't have been able to tell anyone. It was all a blur, noises and colours merging into a stream of nonsense.

Daryl yelling, the woman grunting gutturally as she sliced her own wrist with a knife that seemed to have appeared from nowhere. Blood spurting all over Evie, staining her clothes and her hair with it's unbelievably bright crimson colour.

Evie darted forward, hearing Daryl behind her, telling her no, calling her away, but he seemed far away, like he was down a tunnel, or maybe she was tumbling down the rabbit hole as everything turned into the surreal.

She heard her own ragged breathing as she struggled to find purchase on the woman's arm amongst the thick and slick blood still pulsating at an alarming pace. Wanting so much to bear down pressure, only to have her hand slide off the woman's arm.

Frustrated tears coursing down her blood splattered face. The woman smiling, laughing.

"I'm free" she said, her voice light, if a little strained. She was on her knees, and Evie had no idea when or how that had happened. The colour had drained from the strangers face and her lips had taken on a grey tinge.

She was dying.

Dying and smiling.

"Daryl!" She yelled behind her, desperate for some sort of help, although she knew it was helpless. The woman had all but drained herself, she would die, she would turn, but she got what she wanted.

"C'mon," Daryl was beside her suddenly, his hand wrapping around her forearm, lifting her up onto her feet. "C'mon" he grunted more aggressively. Evie realised the woman was dead, she'd gone, and she was going to turn with Evie sitting beside her, staring blankly into the middle distance, not registering a single thing that was happening anymore.

Daryl managed to drag her away, and she couldn't watch as he doubled back to ensure the woman wouldn't turn and hurt either of them. She stood, facing away, swaying a little on her feet. Daryl returned to her just moments later, wiping the dead woman's knife on an old rag, but it could have been hours for all she knew.

She felt like she was in a long dark tunnel, and as she and Daryl got back to work searching the garage, some part of her knew, she was just going through the motions.

Checking the nooks and crannies for anything worth scavenging, keeping an ear out for the moans of the dead, and the footsteps of her companion. Daryl barely spoke to her until they got back to the car, shutting the trunk the woman had left open, after filling it with spare car batteries, tools, jerry cans which may or may not have been full of fuel. Local maps and mag lights.

* * *

 

"Get in the car." Daryl narrowed his eyes and watched Evie carefully as she automatically moved herself forward on leaden, cumbersome, legs, and got in the passenger side. She hadn't spoken for over an hour, no matter how much he enjoyed not having to make small talk, it was unlike her to be so quiet. She was still covered in blood. It had dried on her face and in her hair, darkening it to an unnatural crimson instead of it's usual auburn. A few strands stuck to her face, crusted up and stiff, and she hadn't tried to remove them.

He was worried about her. He reached out to feel her and there was nothing, a blank, white noise.   
He had put it down to emotional shock. That damned woman had just sliced herself open like a fucking envelope, and as much as she wanted to, as much as she desperately tried, Evie hadn't been able to stop it.

And he'd stood there like a damned ignorant jerk, watching it all in slow motion as Evie was covered in a shower of thick red blood, her hands slipping and sliding over, and shit at points even in to, the woman's skin. Unable to help, unable to stop it.  
And now she was slipping more, slipping away. Sliding into a dark and dangerous place he needed to pull her from, but hell if he knew how, and right then wasn't the time. The trauma was too fresh, he needed to get her home.

"Evie." He tried gently, and she looked at him without really seeing him. Looked right through him. "We got people dependin' on us, ok? People waitin' for this shit we got, we gotta keep it together a little longer" he didn't want to talk to her like she was three, or like she was simple, but he was stuck. This was a Rick trick, he was almost certain that any second she'd pull out a gun and threaten some innocent bystander with it.

He folded his lips into his mouth so he didn't chuckle at that. The timing was off for laughing, and Rick was in the best frame of mind Daryl had seen for a while. It had taken time, and almost losing Carl, but he'd come back. Sasha hadn't seemed more herself as she was with Abraham since Tyreese had died.

Why couldn't everyone be on the same page at the same time? He looked sidelong at Evie, staring a thousand yard stare, and actually he was grateful that this appeared be happening in cycles.

"I'm ok" she said quietly, softly, and he turned to her after starting the engine, folding together the dash control wires before sparking the ignition on. She met his eyes "I am. I'm good." He didn't believe a word of it, but what could he say? She seemed a little more with it, holding his gaze and even trying a smile.

It looked terrifying on her face.

He turned away, and headed directly for home, despite thinking they could run through a strip of local stores they'd passed on the way to the garage, something he'd seen and stored away on his memory banks, it wasn't worth it, the state Evie was in was more dangerous than it looked, no matter how she tried to hide it behind that hideous grin. She needed to rest, and he wanted what was best for her.

He tuned in purposefully once more, worried that he couldn't just feel her like he always could before, and still that white noise nothingness bounced back to him.

Radio static, which made him think of terminus for some reason, and he tuned straight out again, not wanting to dive into those memories.

They got back, flashed their high beams at the gate several times and Eugene let them in. Evie heaved a deep and heavy sigh as Daryl pulled the car to the side of the road in line with several others. He looked at her, watching her carefully, and she sighed again before climbing out without a word. He watched her lope off towards the house an anger rising in him.

Fine, she'd seen something awful, but Jesus Christ hadn't they all? He'd had enough of her acting like she was the only one with issues.   
His animal instincts were taking over him, and before he could stop himself he was following after her, his face sneering, Eugene watching wringing his hands.

* * *

 

"What the hell is wrong with ya?" Daryl yelled as the door slammed behind him. Evie turned on the spot, his rage and sudden exclamation making her jump from her skin.

"What?" She asked, honestly believing he had no right to be angry with her. She narrowed her eyes at him, lifting her hands up and out at her sides. "I told you, I'm fine." She watched as Daryl rolled his eyes and pushed away from the front door.

"Y'ain't, n ya need to let it out, be honest about it. I ain't gonna have ya wantin' t'drink again, Evie. I can't allow that." He was pointing at her, getting in her space, and she slapped his finger away from her.

"How dare you assume what I'm thinking and feeling. How fucking dare you?!" She pulled her jacket off and threw it on the couch. "I'm going to take a shower" she said dismissively.

"Evie" she headed for the stairs and shook her head as he called after her.

"Nope." She replied sharply, taking the stairs two at a time, trying to keep him behind her.   
She got to their room and pulled her clothes off As she walked through to the en suite.

How dare he think she wanted a drink, without even talking to her! She growled as she reached in and ran the shower, still in her socks and underwear. How could he possibly know what was going through her mind?

She caught sight of her bloody hands, rivers of it dried to a map of thin lines and crusted blotches. She pulled them sharply from the taps and looked at them, her arms, rough and cracking blood ran a lazy spiral up to her elbows.   
An odd noise escaped her but she barely heard it. She backed away from the shower and went for the mirror above the sink. She wiped the steam that had already fogged it away with a shaking hand and stared at a face she could barely recognise.

Her hair was dark, caked in claret. Her pale skin was crisp with it, her lips thick and coated.

She brought her hand up to her face as if she didn't believe it was really her reflection. The blood flaked away, and she closed her eyes against the hideous mask she wore, but that was worse.

She saw the woman, the stranger, laughing, her blood pulsating into the air above her own head.

"Evie?" She gasped, high and squeaking in the small bathroom. She turned and it was her, that woman, her arms held out as if she might grab Evie. Evie reached behind her and took the first thing to hand to throw at the woman, her blond hair smothered and dripping with her own blood. She launched a glass tumbler and gasped, stunned, when the woman dissolved away to nothing, and Daryl's hand shot out to catch the glass.

"Get out" she said to him, breathless. "Just go, leave me alone" tears over spilled her eyes and she tried to blink them away. As she did he became her, and then himself again. "Please, Daryl, please go" instead he shut the door behind him, and began to take off his own clothes. She shook her head, crying openly.

"Just go" she whispered, weak, worn out.

"C'mon" he said, now naked and unashamed. He bent down and removed her socks. "In the shower" he demanded, and though she wanted to be alone, she really really did, she complied, stripping off her panties and stepping under the scalding water.


	49. Chapter 49

Daryl's rage collapsed around him as Evie turned to him, almost naked, streaked with blood, in that bathroom. Her big green eyes were wide and her fear was obvious, anyone could have seen it, but he felt it, too. It welled up deep in his gut, like a wave about to crash on the shore. She was torn for a second between fight and flight, looking for a way out as she reached behind her and launched a glass tumbler at him.

He caught it reflexively, put it down before approaching her. Her scent was strong and pulsating, her mild glow was almost humming as it clung tightly to her body.

Now they were in the shower together, the scalding water prickling their skin. He grabbed the shampoo and started to lather up the ends of her hair which were worst encrusted with blood. He soothed and smoothed them with his fingers and the soap, as the water ran pink into the plug hole.

He lathered up the shampoo in his hands and next massaged her head, she faced away from him still, but he could feel how soothed she was at his touch. He massaged the nape of her neck and her shoulders, hoping to calm and relax her further. She was stiff, unyielding, and she rolled her shoulders under his hands.

"Y'know, y'ain't alone here." He said softly, his hands sliding back into her hair. She hummed her approval as his fingers worked their magic. "There's a whole buncha us who're here for ya." Evie turned to face him, looking up at him through the rivers of pale pink water running down her face.

"I know" she said gently, blinking slowly. She smiled a little as she lathered her own hands up with shampoo, and reached up for his hair. As her finger pads ran little circles on his scalp he held eye contact, trying to feel her put, her eyes were sad, but it was impossible to tell if she was crying in the shower. She ran her fingers through his hair, all the way to the ends, and as her palms came up and rested on his cheeks everything went out of his head.

* * *

 

Evie had planned it that way. She wanted to take his mind off helping her to heal. He'd burst into the house so angry and she had disarmed him somehow. She wished she knew how. She didn't want to think about that woman and her wrists split almost down to the bone. As Daryl massaged her skin she could feel him creeping around in her emotions, and she had to turn and do something to make it stop. So she soaped her hands up and buried them in his hair, knowing her touch, their nakedness, the steaming hot water, could all work in her favour. She wanted to forget it, if only for a moment. The whole world outside, not just _her_ , but everything.

Then he was leaning forward and pressing his mouth gently against hers, his body moving into her, their wet skin sliding against each other, and blissfully she let the thoughts slip away, until there was only the two of them in the whole world.

She kissed him back, reaching for his dick with a soapy hand and pleased to find it hard in anticipation. Daryl quivered when she ran her hand up and over the head, and she was again amazed at how soft the skin there was, smooth and sensitive.

The fast flowing hot water bounced off Daryl's shoulders, sending up droplet rainbows in the light of his glow. Evie watched them with a small smile on her lips, then ran her hands over Daryl's chest and shoulders. His lips found hers again, and his hands cupped her breasts, running his thumbs over her nipples which stiffened and peaked under his touch.

She arched her back to thrust her chest harder into his hands, kissing him deeply and fumbling blindly between his legs for his cock again. She found it, and angled her body so the tip was resting against her clit. As she began to ran her soapy hands back and forth along his length it vibrated deliciously against her. Biting her bottom lip she looked up at him, his dark blue eyes following her every move, his fangs extended, lips partially open to reveal them. His tongue darted out and ran over one of his canines. She felt a smile spread on her face, and continued watching his mouth as she thrusted her groin against his, and his dick slipped deliciously close to entering her.

Daryl growled, a frustrated and sexy sound. She did it again, biting her lip, and as he grumbled she buried her hands in his hair and pulled his head down to hers

"Bite me" she whispered huskily "bite me and fuck me" she swallowed and met his eyes again, and he snarled before complying.

* * *

 

Daryl cupped Evie's ass and lifted her slightly, his mouth finding her neck as his inhuman strength made the awkward position easy. He licked her skin delicately tasting her anticipation and need on the tip of his tongue, before burying his teeth into her and sliding her gently onto his erection. Her moan echoed off the tiles around them, and he heard himself grunting in reply. He backed her into the shower door and she gasped as her skin hit the coolness of the glass. He felt her leg lift and curl around him, pulling him in closer as he pounded her against the sliding door. Goosebumps broke out on her skin and Daryl realised the shower was running cold.

Evie muttered expletives as she clenched around him and began to move with urgency. He didn't want this to be over, so he moved back and lifted her down to her own feet. She stared at him, incredulous, auburn hair beginning to curl at the ends where it was drying.

"What the hell?" She asked him as he reached and turned off the shower. "I was... why did you stop?" She was frustrated, it showed in the little flecks of colour in her aura. He didn't want to tell her that if she orgasmed, so would he, and no matter the superhuman powers he possessed he was still just a man in some ways, and when he was done, well... these things take time.

She stood naked, dripping, bright green eyes narrowed as she glared. Frustration clear on her stance.

He reached out and ran his hands down her arms, taking her hands.

"Come to bed." He raised an eye brow at her as she let out a low, confused, laugh

"I'm soaking wet!" He dropped her left hand and cupped her between the legs firmly.

"Ya tellin' me."

* * *

Evie was taken aback. Daryl was rarely so forward. He teased at her with his middle finger, eliciting a little gasp from her parted lips. She breathed out slowly through her nose and looked him in the eye with out turning her face up to him. She licked her lips and blinked purposefully, trying to convey just how much trouble he was in for stopping when she was so close to bliss.

She pushed at his forearm and he let her move him away, she knew he wouldn't have moved under her own force. She pondered on that, how much control could she possibly have ever again? She wondered if that was what the whole stopping while she was so close was. Control. Of course it was. It was how he was built. She could feel his need, then, once she was looking for it. His need for control.

She didn't like the feeling, or the taste that left in her mouth. She narrowed her eyes at Daryl and placed her hands on his chest. It was hard beneath her fingers, but she tried not to enjoy the feeling too much.

"Turn around" she said, trying to be soft and seductive, but the words came out as an order, and she hated the bitterness she heard in them. "Do it" she said when he didn't immediately comply, then pushed on his chest a little. "You think you're going to take control of this and you're not"

"I'm not?" He asked, with a raised eyebrow and a hint of a smirk on his lips. She grimaced and pushed again on him.

"Just turn around and face the wall, before I change my mind and get dried and dressed"

"You're a sore loser" he said, smiling again, but turning away as she requested. Evie rolled her eyes, the arrogant prick. He was feeling around in her head again. In that moment she hated that they could feel each others emotions and feelings.

"You haven't won yet." She smiled despite her self, reaching around his naked torso and grabbing his still erect cock in her hands. She'd have the last laugh, though.

* * *

 

He knew what was happening, and he let it. She'd poked around at what he was feeling and got the wrong end of the stick. Fuck it. She had his dick in her hands and if she wanted to feel like she owned this moment, why not? He had just wanted to control himself, and actually it was nice to have someone else want to control him

She began pumping her hand gently up and down and any idea of control we away.

He leaned forward and placed his palms on the cold tile in front of him, he found himself wishing he hadn't turned the water off, but anything that happened was Evie's call.

"Spread your legs" she demanded in no uncertain terms, her left hand still delicately running over his length, made easier as their bodies air dried because he was uncircumcised, the extra skin paring down the friction. He spread his legs a little and her right hand slid between his thighs, her thumb running gently along the crack of his as she did so. He turned his head a a if to look behind him, but she 'tsked' at him and he faced forward again as her index finger curled back and applied pressure to his perineum.

"Oh, shit" he breathed, balling his hands into fists against the tiles and pushing down against her right hand.

"Are you begging?" She asked him quietly, and he could hear the smile in her voice. He growled in reply and screwed his eyes closed as he felt her thumb tease at the crack of his cheeks again. "Sounds like begging to me" she pressed her lips against his shoulder and kissed him with an audible smack. "Mmmm I love these big wide shoulders." playing on his masculinity.

The girl was a fucking genius, Massaging his ass, his taint, his cock and his ego in one hit. She started pumping her fist harder and he was sure he was about to explode, all thoughts of not wanting to gone, he needed to come, and suddenly she made a growling noise, which was kind of cute, and bit hard into his shoulder while thrusting her thumb in ass and exerting more pressure on his perineum. The sensations all hit him at once, and he grunted hard and loud, before ropes of hot semen shot from his dick and spluttered all over the tiles.

He pulled away from her, from the finger in his ass and on his taint, leaning his head against the tiles as his dick quivered in her palm.

He was breathing hard, shoulders heaving in his exertion, and Evie was already gone.

Wrapped in a large fluffy towel she sat on the bed and brushed her hair. Now wearing his underwear Daryl leaned against the doorframe of the ensuite and watched her until she looked up at him.

"Where'd ya go?" He asked with a shrug, and Evie smiled at him.

"I got everything I needed." She said slyly. They looked at each other a long time, and to Daryl it felt like a stand off. She was still fighting for some semblance of control even though she had showed she was fully capable of gaining it over him.

As he held her gaze he wondered why she would possibly care, but his thoughts were cut dead by a knock at the door which startled them both. They tore their eyes away from each other, and Glenn poked his head around the door.

"Hey, uh, hi, sorry." Even after years of being a Well respected member of their team, he would forever be Glenn. Daryl smiled at him.

"What's up, short stack?" Glenn scratched his head.

"Uh, yeah, Rick wanted to see you? Are you guys ok? Eugene said you were both covered in blood when you got back"

"We're fine" Evie grunted. "You coming to dinner later?" Carol still cooked for them regularly. Even if they had moved into separate houses and split themselves up. Glenn nodded.

"Yeah. I hope Carol remembered not to make Maggie those stuffed giant pasta shells again. I had to throw those shoes out." Evie grimaced at the memory, so Daryl changed the subject.

"Uh huh, 'nuffa that talk jus' 'fore we eat. Tell Rick I'll be over... once I'm dressed." Glenn pinked a little and left them to it.

Daryl sat on the bed, and Evie began to brush her hair again.

"What's going on?" He asked her, as she dismissed him by turning away.

"Nothing. Aren't you going to see what Rick wants?" Daryl sighed, got dressed, and left her in their room.

As he jogged down the stairs he caught a whiff of something, a suggestion of a feeling drifting down the stairs after him. Dismay, or disquiet. Though he was concerned he left the house, if she wanted to tell him what was going on, she would.

He had been so damn sure she would.


	50. Chapter 50

Evie sat at the table in Rick, Michonne and Carl's house feeling like all eyes were on her. Carol offered her a glass of wine, and though she slowly licked her lips, suddenly so dry and desperate for the dark liquid, she declined.

"No. Not for me" After all, she'd already knocked a bottle back at home.

She looked around the table, and in fact the only eyes on her were Daryl's, and she could see instantly that he knew, even though everyone else was too engrossed in everything else to notice, he had. He looked disappointed. She was too drunk to feel him properly, even if she did think she was holding it pretty well.

She tried to convey some sort of apology, with her eyes, her thoughts, but Daryl sneered and turned away. He was disgusted.  
She couldn't blame him, but at the same time, she couldn't help it.

_As the door of the house had clicked closed behind him, the tears had just gushed out of her. She hadn't even realised she was just barely holding it together, and there she was sobbing like a child._

_The sex was over and now she was thrust back into a reality where her hands had been inside a woman's skin, a woman who had just sliced herself up like foodstuffs. Thrust into a reality where nothing at all was under her control, where the dead got back up and cannibalised the living, for god's sake._

_She needed a new reality, and though losing herself in Daryl was the perfect distraction, it only lasted too-short moments at a time, she needed something more sustainable. Something that could continue, uninterrupted by thoughts of people so desperate for a new world of their own that they would take their lives, in front of you, with a smile on their face._  
_So she ran downstairs, tears drying up, and dashed into the kitchen. She grabbed a bottle of screw-top wine and twisted it open. Even in her haste she had a single second thought, a moment to stop and think if this was really what she wanted, but that woman's smile flickered in her head along with Freya's walker ruined neck and shoulder, and so she tipped the bottle neck to her mouth and took a hefty swallow._

_It went down like silk, like soothing syrup, and she finished the bottle in short time, standing at the sink in nothing but a towel._

It transpired that Rick had asked Daryl again to go on a scout with him, the community was running low on supplies, medication especially, and Rick wanted his right hand man with him. He'd been out alone, but wasn't getting very far that way.

"We'll start in the morning, Denise and Olivia are already compiling lists for us, of things we need." Evie watched as he seemingly took a gulp of his wine in slow motion. She looked at her food, untouched, and when she looked up again Daryl was glaring at her.

When they left, heading across to their own house shared with Maggie and Glenn who had already gone home for the night, Daryl stopped her between the two buildings.

"What the hell are ya doin'?" He sounded exhausted. He stood in front of her like a wall and looked ready to put her on her ass if she tried to get around him and avoid this whole discussion.

"I'm not. I'm not doing, I'm not thinking." Evie shrugged at him.

"Damn right y'ain't thinkin'" he cursed at her. "Ya may have fooled them" he pointed vaguely at Rick's house, "but don't think ya foolin' me. I know I can't stop ya doin' whatever ya gotta do, but I ain't gonna sit n watch ya throw ya damned life away either." Evie frowned a question at him and he shook his head. "It ain't gonna make nothin' better"

"It helps me forget" she interjected, but he grabbed her arms as if he might shake her and she tried to pull away from his grip but it was too strong "you're hurting me" Daryl's face dropped as he let her go.

"What d'ya think ya doin' to me?" His voice was soft, he sounded dejected. Evie went to move forward, hug him, console him, but he moved out of reach, looked at her a long moment, and turned away.

"Don't make it a habit" She followed him into the house but at his weird warp speed he seemed to have disappeared. He wasn't in the living room, not in the kitchen. She stumbled unsteadily up the stairs and found he wasn't in the bedroom.

She huffed a sigh to herself, contemplated heading back to the kitchen for a drink, but collapsed into bed instead.

She slept, fully dressed and still with her shoes on, right through until morning.

 

***

Daryl and Rick were already out collecting their lists when she woke up. She checked the little old fashioned alarm clock by the bed and saw it was already after 7. Shit. She hadn't been up that late in over a year.

She made to get out of bed, throwing the cover off and sitting up, before crashing back down into the pillows with a heavy groan.  
She hadn't eaten. Her head was pounding, the room span like a carnival ride and she threw her hands over her mouth in a poor attempt to hold back the heave that threatened. There was a ratatat on the door and she groaned again as Maggie popped her head in.

"Hey. We were getting worried about you." She had coffee, instant, of course, with powdered milk, but Evie felt a surge of love for Maggie in that moment. Maggie sat on the edge of the bed and looked Evie over. "You and I were the only ones not drinking last night." She said quizzically, a cautious eye running over Evie as she reached for the mug Maggie offered. "Kinda weird that we're the ones that got sick." Evie frowned.

"I'm not sick" she noted. "Neither are you. Pregnant isn't the same as sick." Maggie's mouth dropped open and Evie shook her head, though she instantly regretted the action. Maggie's face broke into a grin and Evie waved her arms almost spilling her hot drink.

"No, no, I'm not pregnant, I mean you're not sick. Oh god." Evie had to stop being so energetic, she felt dreadful. "I'm just, I'm tired. I'm getting up now, ok?" She took a slurp of the hot liquid and closed her eyes as it slid down her throat. She'd have preferred black, but it was a delight anyway. Especially that morning.

* * *

 

Daryl threw Rick a look as he snapped his fingers out of time with the god-awful music he'd put on in the car, as if anyone liked Ronnie Dee that much.

But he was enjoying it too much to notice Daryl's narrow eyed glare. He sighed to himself, ran his hand over his head and down the back of his neck. He'd 'slept' on the couch the Night before, and though he wasn't one to actually sleep he'd drifted into a zoned out state, where memories played back to him like dreams. He'd laid too long on his back and the crick in his neck was a surprising turn of events. He didn't get aches and pains, not normally.

"Ya slept on the couch!" Rick yelled over the music, and Daryl reached to turn that shit down. Better Rick drown it out than the other way around.

"What?" He asked, as if he hadn't heard perfectly.

"Last night, you and Evie ok?" Daryl snorted and shrugged, almost tempted to turn Ronnie back to full volume. He'd certainly rather that then this particular conversation. When he offered nothing more Rick cajoled him gently with his voice. "Daryl? It's ok, guys can talk about this stuff." Daryl snorted again. Rick still had this image of him as new to relationships and friendships. As if they hadn't been together for the years since the end.

"I know" he said quietly. "It's alright if I don't wanna, too, ain't it?" Rick shrugged a little keeping both his hands on the steering wheel, but Daryl didn't like the small smirk lifting up one side of his mouth.

"You don't wanna talk, you don't have to. You _should_ ," he added that last with real inflection, but Daryl just wanted to put it to bed. Evie had pissed him off, astronomically, but it was one drink, one night. Talking wouldn't help. "It'll help" Rick said earnestly, but Daryl turned to look out the window with the trees swinging past at break neck speed. A small hum barely coming from his closed mouth.

Rick dropped it, and thankfully didn't turn the volume on the stereo back up either.

He gave it a good mile or so before he broke the amiable silence they'd fallen into, changing the subject.

"Today's the day." He sounded excited, Daryl was pleased Rick had come back to them, despite all it took to get him there, he had missed him, he'd been worried about him. He snorted, more to himself than at Rick, at the thought that he'd missed him.

"It is?"

"Yeah! We're gonna find food. Maybe some people" Daryl shrugged, but Rick continued, still smiling an eager grin. "Law of averages, it's gotta catch up sooner or later"

"I dunno, y'aint seen no one for weeks. Maybe we won't find no one. Maybe that ain't such a bad thing." Daryl fiddled with his hands, picking at his thumbs. He didn't want to go over it all again, Rick knew how he felt about people now. They were better as they were, a small group who knew each other inside and out.

Well, mostly. He huffed to himself as Evie crossed his mind again. Evie who he seemingly barely knew. How could she be so stupid? He was jolted from his thoughts as Rick slammed on the brakes and reversed them back to a crossroads they had almost passed.

"Would you look at that?" Rick said, grinning from ear to ear, nodding sagely at building in the distance. Even Daryl couldn't help but smile a little at the sign writing on the roof.

Sorghum.

He looked over at Rick whose eyes twinkled the tiniest bit as they met Daryl's,

"C'mon, say it. I know ya wanna" Rick nodded.

"Law of averages Daryl, law of averages." Still grinning, he steered them into the sudden junction toward the building.

* * *

 

Michonne had run into Evie, literally, whack straight into her, and asked her to take up the wall while she ran an errand.

"What errand?" Evie was curious, Michonne was rarely so wrought.

"Just a thing that I have to do. Will you?" Evie nodded, and Michonne had dashed out of the gate before she could articulate a reply.  
She was outside hoping some air would help her hangover. She felt foolish and red faced and didn't want to have too much to do with other people. The wall was perfect.

She climbed the newly placed, better made, ladder to the main platform and cast her eye around the outside. The group had been very busy in the two weeks since the herd broke in, and Evie watched as a walker trundled straight into a spiked vehicle, piercing itself without a flinch. It turned her stomach a little. What was this new affliction? She'd never been squeamish before. She wondered how she would ever cope if she and Daryl had kids and she'd have to hunt for them.

Oh.

She gasped, a sob stuck in her throat. That was a new thought, one she'd never entertained before. Of course they wouldn't, she wasn't sure if they even could.

She hitched the rifle on her shoulder a little, sure she wouldn't have to use it. It had been so quiet of late, so boring.  
Kids. She smiled to herself. She and Daryl would make great kids. Little ginger haired blue eyed beauties, or dark haired boys with her green eyes in Daryl's stunningly crafted bone structure.

She sighed to herself and reached absently in the pocket of the borrowed jacket she wore, expecting to find cigarettes. But her fingertips glanced upon something else, cold, metal, hard. She dug a little deeper and grabbed the object knowing instantly what it was.

She pulled the little flask out and stared at it, it was silver and intricately engraved with swirls and waves. Folding her lips into her mouth she gave it a tiny shake, and realised it was full of liquid.

Hurriedly she put it back into the pocket she'd found it and patted along the rest of the coat still looking for a smoke. She didn't find one, and wondered who else had been secretly drinking. She pulled the little flask out and looked at it again. It felt almost warm to the touch now, she must have handled it more and for longer than she thought.

"Hey!" She heard a call from behind and below her and she jumped, startled, guiltily burying the drinks canister in the pocket again. She turned and looked down to find Maggie looking up and shielding her eyes. Still, she squinted, her mouth curling up at one edge like she was smiling.

"Hey, sorry. I Thought Michonne was on duty today?" Evie shrugged down at her, her mind still a million miles away as she spoke to Maggie. She wasn't showing yet, no bump distorted the long sleeved Tee she wore.

"Errands to run, walkers to kill, I guess. What's up?" Maggie was looking for Enid, and Evie hadn't seen her. She watched as Maggie walked away, her hand clutching the flask in her pocket once more.

 _This is stupid,_ Freya berated in her head. _Stupid, Evie. Daryl will never forgive you. What would you rather? Sobriety, this shit reality with Daryl by your side, or to be so fucked on whiskey you don't know what day it is, alone, out there with the monsters?_

Sam flashed in Evie's mind. Little Sam's face as a walker ripped into his neck and shoulder. She sobbed, a loud harsh sound, and pulled the flask from her pocket, automatically twisting off the top as if she was in a daze.

_You're so fucking stupid, Evie. You deserve to be alone if this is how you behave._

The voice in her head was no longer her sister's. As Evie necked the amber fluid down in several long swallows the truth came out, as she suspected all along, the voice in her head was her own.


	51. Chapter 51

"You alright?" Rick ran over to Daryl as he stood gingerly from his tumble with the long haired piece of shit who called himself Jesus.

"Yeah, thanks" He brushed his pants over and turned to watch the truck he and Rick had scavenged slowly sink in the lake. "Fuck, man." Rick's hand patted his shoulder, firm but friendly, he was still so enthusiastic and optimistic. Daryl couldn't stand it.

"Lets check those cars out, and get the hell out of here. What about him?" Daryl jutted his chin at Paul 'Jesus' Rovia.

"What about the _guy_?" He asked with a sneer in his voice, hoping to convey his distaste. The guy had far too shiny hair, a trim and well kept beard, and a floor length leather coat on in the ridiculous heat. They'd already tied him up and left him to escape and go home, but the asshole had escaped and followed them.

"Well, he helped you out." Daryl sneered with his face. He owed him after losing all their shit. He was pretty sick of losing out. The guy had a good scent, like baking bread. Warm and wholesome, But Daryl was set in his idea and stubborn too. No more people, no more strangers. He never wanted to entertain the dude in the first place, he called himself fucking Jesus for Christ's sake, but Rick had insisted.

"Maybe." he conceded, though he knew he could look after himself. The asshole had ruined his day more than once already.   
However; he had managed to keep Daryl occupied with something other than Evie. He huffed a sigh at the thought of her, and what he may have to deal with when they got back.   
"Fine," he said, his mood well and truly soured "we'll stick 'im in a tree." Rick snorted a laugh.

"He ever pull a gun on you?"

"Nah. That's why we'll throw 'im outta reach." Rick was shaking his head as they walked towards the cars that had been parked in the field they'd ended up in.

"What's with you today?" Daryl shrugged, making a non committing noise through his closed mouth. "Daryl?" He rolled his eyes, and his shoulders.

"Nothin'. I'm good. We're good" Rick didn't believe him, that much was clear, but he dropped the subject again.

Daryl wasn't sure how long he could lie to him, his best friend, his brother. He sighed inwardly, hoping Evie had sobered up and realised her mistake, realised why it upset him so much.

It killed to him to even think it, but he couldn't stay with her if she was going to fall into that pit of crap. It physically hurt to imagine a life where they weren't together, he placed a hand on his chest and steadied his breathing which had sped up on its own. He didn't think he could hold it together without her, but he couldn't hold it together for his family if she was busy looking for the next drink, either.

"Would you look at that!" Rick said beside him, pulling him from His thought, standing proud next to an open car door. "Open, and the keys are inside" Daryl rolled his eyes. "It's the law of averages." Daryl snorted

"Bullshit" Rick shook his head but was still smiling.

"C'mon, lets grab him and load him up."

***

"You wouldn't' have gone through with it" Later on Rick was still positively jovial. They were on their way home. "You wouldn't've left him" Daryl grunted.

"I would, right up in a tree."

"No. I know. You got it, the instant we turned up at Alexandria. Michonne, Glenn, you all saw, tried to tell me" Daryl was chewing on his thumb. The car thudded over a bump and the new guy rolled onto his shoulder. He shrugged him off hard, Rick was chuckling.

"So shut up," he smiled and tugged on the steering wheel, knocking Paul onto Daryl again. "Cause I'm listening now."

* * *

 

It was dark. The sky was clear and the stars shone brighter than she'd seen for some time.

She'd slid down the ladder, missing a rung or two and landing awkwardly on her feet. Michonne had just come back with Spencer in tow and they both looked shattered. Evie turned her face away as they passed each other, knowing from the heat in her face that she'd be flushed. Damn that stupid hip flask! She went to rush into her own home when the gate creaked back on its wheels again, and a car drove in.

Daryl and Rick were back.

She hurried, head down, into the house.

She expected him in after ten minutes, and when twenty minutes had gone by and he hadn't entered the house she started to worry. What had they found? What had they seen? She hadn't felt any pull from him, there was no feeling in her that he was in danger, maybe that was the alcohol. She didn't know, she couldn't know.

She chewed on her bottom lip, glaring at the front door like the answers might emerge there. Her head was fuzzy, foggy, and the whiskey she drank had left her with a warm feeling in her belly. It was a feeling she could get used to, and she buried her teeth into the meat of her lip hard to chastise herself. She couldn't get used to this feeling, not again. Daryl had made it perfectly clear that he didn't agree with Alcohol as a form of self medication, and she wasn't sure she could cope on this world without him.

It really felt like they were meant for each other, and perhaps they would have found each other regardless of walkers and deadly reanimation viruses.

She tasted blood and jumped up from the couch, putting her hand to her lip. She'd got carried away and chewed too hard. She cursed to herself quietly, eyes darting around for something to stem the blood flow.

She wondered if Daryl would feel her panic, smell her blood, and realised there were paper towels in the kitchen, and pushed through the pristine white door in a rush, leaving a bloody fingerprint in her wake.

She was standing at the countertop, looking through the kitchen window into the surrounding darkness, paper napkin held firmly to her bottom lip, when she heard the front door open and close.

It had to be Daryl, with Maggie and Glenn already in bed for the night it was unlikely, at that late hour, that anyone would come visiting. She sighed to herself and turned to the door as it opened very slowly.

His face was set into a scowl. He looked the door over as he walked through it, Evie watched him very clearly and obviously scent the bloody print she'd left.

"I bit my lip." She said, indicating with the napkin in her hand. His deep frown didn't soften, as she had expected it might when it was proven she was safe.

"Been drinkin'?" He shot at her, and she wasn't sure if it was a question or an accusation.

"Hi, honey I'm home!" Evie said sarcastically with a roll of her eyes. "How was your day? Oh, good, I was on the wall today, yours?" She glared at him, glanced at the bloody napkin, and shrugged her shoulders with a shake of her head.

"Ya blood smells like alcohol, Evie. Ya wanna know how my day was?" He strutted purposefully into the room, keeping his voice low which made it all the more menacing."I'm out there, findin' food for the community, which we found, but lost cause'a some prick calls himself Jesus, by the way, I come home not exactly expectin' to find that while I've been out havin' a fuckin' day n a half to provide for ya, ya've been drinkin' yaself into a stupor." He was gritting his teeth to keep his voice down. His anger was washing over Evie in waves and it made her sick. She made herself sick. She was disgusted, but all that fell from her mouth was stupid and pointless.

"Jesus?" Was all she managed. Daryl sighed heavily, all the way from his boots, and visibly slumped as he did so.

"Yeah. Jesus." He looked at his thumb, contemplated it like it might say something, then popped it sideways into his mouth and chewed at the cuticle. Evie watched him, aware of his anger subsiding. She checked the paper towel, noticed she was no longer bleeding and placed it in the trash.

"Why're ya doin' it, Evie?" Had he felt her disgust at herself? Had he realised how much hatred she felt at herself for what she'd done, while he and Rick were risking their lives? She sighed heavily, deeply, and an odd moan escaped her. A woeful sound. Daryl dropped his thumb from his mouth and straightened up.

"I'm sorry" she said, after taking a watery breath. "Really, I am." She turned to leave, expecting he might stop her, call her back. She even stopped in the doorway, but nothing was forthcoming.

* * *

 

As far as Daryl was concerned, sorry was just the start. The feeling coming from her matched completely the dejected look of her, and he believed she was truly sorry.

He'd feel better if she could go a day without it. He'd feel better if she had answered his question, that she could pinpoint a reason, without giving an excuse.

She couldn't, and it worried him. 

Part of him wished he could be more supportive. She'd been through hell, more than once, and post traumatic stress could destroy the strongest of people, but he had seen the worst of people through alcoholism, and to support he thought might be taken for acceptance, and that was something he wouldn't do. He loved her, with everything he was he knew they were meant to be. No matter how much logic told him that was bullshit he couldn't shake it. They were soulmates.

But.

He snorted softly to himself and turned to the dark window. They'd all been through Hell. He couldn't accept that as an excuse.

He blew air out of his mouth loudly, turning as he heard the imperceptible squeak of the stair at the bottom of the case in the other room. He listened to Glenn's soft footsteps as he padded towards the kitchen. He quickly grabbed and empty glass and held it like he'd just finished having a drink, to look like he had a reason to be standing in the kitchen alone so late at night.

"Oh, hey man." Glenn startled as he saw him, Daryl gave him a shallow nod.

"Hey." Glenn frowned, like he was looking for something to say.

"Good day?" Daryl shook his head.

"Nah. Not really." He put the glass he held into the sink and looked out of the window, watching Glenn's reflection in the black glass. Glenn looked at his back for a moment before opening the fridge and grabbing a bottle of water.

"Evie ok? She's, uh, been pretty quiet." Daryl nodded and turned back to face him.

"Yeah. We're," he paused. What were they? "We're going through some stuff." He settled with. Glenn nodded solemnly, like he'd noticed as much. Silence span out between them. Daryl reflected that life had changed so much in such a short time, they barely knew what to say to each other anymore.

"You'll be ok" Glenn said with a small smile "relationships have bumps sometimes. A lot's changed" he spoke Daryl's thoughts. "Sometimes having the time to stop, to breathe, can make you question stuff." He lifted the water bottle, indicating he got what he came for. "I'm shattered, I'm here if ya wanna talk though, man, ok? But don't worry, you and Evie are pretty solid. You'll work it out" Daryl chewed on his bottom lip and hummed a reply, no longer daring to look Glenn in the eye.

He couldn't understand why everyone suddenly wanted to give him relationship advice, as if he didn't know what he was doing. Glenn was lingering like he was waiting for more, but Daryl had never felt the need to fill a silence with anything that needn't be said. That was one of the things he liked about Evie, why he got on so well with Rick. Glenn looked like he might say something, twice, before he finally nodded with a quick

"Good night" Before leaving. Daryl chewed on his tongue, looking at the closed door for some time. He thought perhaps he should tell someone, seek some help or advice.

He was pretty sure Evie could work through it given time, and he really didn't want anyone judging her in the meantime.   
He could hardly be picked up on keeping secrets, given the whopper he'd been hiding from everyone since the start.

He sighed to himself, pushed off from the countertop and headed for the lounge, looking to take up the couch for the night again.

Maybe they were right, maybe he had absolutely no idea what he was doing. He thought perhaps he and Evie should talk, but he dared not go near her right then in case an argument brewed out of nothing.

He was a coward.

She always said it, now it was clear. What with not confronting who he really was, now he couldn't confront who she really was, because he was scared of the confrontation and what that could mean for them as a pairing.   
_That what y'are?_ Beth's voice, sunshine and corn and big blue innocent eyes. The old Beth. _Bonded?_ He nodded to himself. He thought so. The pain in his chest just because he wasn't near her, the simple feeling that they were meant to be. Yeah. They were bonded.

He lay back on the couch and tucked an arm under his head, staring at the ceiling. It was going to be a long night if he couldn't think his way around this.

_Sing for me, Beth,_ he thought, and her soft voice filled part of his mind as he tried to work out exactly what he was going to do about Evie.


	52. Chapter 52

Evie's eyes shot open at the hammering on the door, but in her mind it wasn't the front door being hammered down, it was the fast paced shots of a semi automatic rifle, like those used by the terminus group, shooting at her and her family as they ran for their lives from the bullets through a herd of the undead on fire.

She threw herself onto the floor and crawled under the bed in the hope that the attackers wouldn't see her. Then the murmuring moans of the walkers reached her ears, the screams of the living being torn apart by the dead, and she screwed herself up as small as she could, until they were surrounding her, stretching to reach for her tasty living flesh.  
She was bleary eyed and fuzzy headed, and when she finally pulled herself together, suddenly feeling rather silly, Daryl was on the floor on his hands and knees, reaching in to her to coax her out.

* * *

 

The hammering at the door startled Daryl, and he sat bolt upright on the couch. There was a thud upstairs which he assumed was someone getting reluctantly out of bed.

He yanked the door open and stared, rather surprised, at Carl. It wasn't really even light yet.  
"Dad said you have to come. Now" Daryl raised an eyebrow at the kid, who seemed more moody than usual. Hormones were buzzing around inside him at a rate of knots, Daryl could feel and smell it on him, testosterone fighting its way through everything else. It wasn't as strong as it had been a year ago, but...

Another bump upstairs and a distinct feeling of utter horror filled his mind. Evie was suddenly frightened out of her wits. He turned from Carl without explanation and took to the stairs, an action he had very little choice in, and Carl actually followed behind with a huff of annoyance squeezing out of him. Daryl hadn't followed his plan, to get him to Rick 'Now' and it bugged the teen senseless, he didn't even know why that pissed him off.

Daryl would have found it amusing if Evie wasn't so sure she was about to die.

He threw the bedroom door open and she was whimpering under the bed. He darted forward and reached under towards her, but she scooted back from him and emitted a low mewling sound. It confused him, and it hurt him deeply that she was so scared of him.

Carl knelt beside Daryl and frowned at Evie under the bed.  
Her eyes were wide and quickly darting from side to side. She was seeing things they weren't. She kicked out at Carl, hard, as he removed his hat to get a better look at her, but he dodged it expertly despite his depth perception problems. He stood and looked down at Daryl, his hat in his hands.

"Is she hallucinating?" He asked breathlessly. Daryl gave him a nod and reached under for her again. She was breathing hard, but this time she seemed to see him. Maggie appeared at the door, asking what was happening, but Daryl focussed on Evie as Carl explained.

"Evie?" He reached his fingers towards her "c'mon, grab my hand" tentatively she reached out to him, and he gripped her shaking hand in his firmly. Something changed in her, She'd pinked considerably across the cheeks, and the fear had dissipated leaving a confused humiliation in its wake.  "C'mon" he said again, heaving her toward him.

"I thought..." she started, standing and looking around. "I... heard gunfire, walkers." Daryl stood in front of her and caught her eye.

"Ya suffering from Stress, Evie. Ya need to see the Doc." He placed his hands on her shoulders, "there's, there's other stuff happenin', Jesus escaped, I gotta go to Rick's with Maggie n Glenn n Carl. Will ya go to Dr Cloyd?" Evie shrugged him off and stepped away from him.

"I'm ok" she said gently, and Daryl knew instantly she wasn't going to go to the infirmary. "I'm fine, better than that" she was rambling, babbling, and he knew without doubt that she was being defensive. Knowing someone so well,  
" _Bein' bonded_ " Beth reminded him,

Had it's pitfalls.  
"It was a bad dream, that's all. I'm fine. Go, go and sort out things. I'm fine, really."

***

"She's suffering" Maggie said quietly as the front door clicked closed behind the foursome. She turned to Daryl with her wide green eyes and he saw so much Beth in her that he had to blink and look away. "PTSD, Sasha was the same. We should keep an eye on her." They descended the porch steps and Daryl took a quick look back at the house, fancying he saw a net curtain twitch as Evie undoubtedly waited for them to be gone.

"We got other shit to deal with, Evie just needs to know she's safe, n with a stranger runnin' 'round that ain't gonna be easy"

* * *

 

Evie quickly dressed once the group had entered into Rick's house. She felt incredibly self conscious now, babbling like an idiot and squirming on the floor in front of everyone. Now this guy Jesus was free and if he could escape and run around within the walls, what about those outside?  
Nowhere was safe anymore, and they'd sat on their damned haunches far too long feeling like everything was just cushy and wonderful. It wasn't, but they could make it so.

She headed out of the house and across to the armoury, where she planned to sign out a gun and plenty of bullets.  
Everyone else could sit and wait for danger, she would go and make sure it stayed away.

***

Olivia hadn't given in without a fight, and Eugene was full of questions on the gate.

"That's a mighty hefty piece of kit for a hunting expedition." He noted as the gate slammed home. Evie nodded,

"I got some hefty prey to catch."

"You think going alone is the best idea? I'm sure Sasha or Rosita would accompany..."

"I'm fine" Evie cut him off sharply. And he nodded. Mumbling

"Yes m'am" as she walked away. She didn't take a vehicle, she didn't need one. She wasn't going far.

***

She sat quite comfortably in the thick branches, full of fresh green leaves, of an oak tree she'd seen on her travels. A tall old tree, it was sturdy enough for her to stand if she wanted, rifle sight to her eye, and pick off walkers for hundreds feet, and they wouldn't know where she was. It was almost perfect.

She reached a hand inside her pack, sitting next to her on the branch, and traced her fingers lightly over the cold glass of the scotch bottle.

Maybe it was perfect.

It had been so easy! While Olivia fussed and clucked over the rifle and bullets being taken out she hadn't thought to follow Evie to the food store, the alcohol. It'd be 'missing' if anyone looked for it, records were kept, but by the time she was done it wouldn't matter. They would be safer, and she would be a damn hero, deserving a fucking drink to celebrate.

She tore her hand from the bag and stretched her fingers, the pads almost tingling with the exhilaration at the idea of a celebratory drink.

But not yet. She needed to earn it and then no one could complain.

She got up, put the rifle to her eye and scouted around for the dead, the living, whatever hapless shit happened to stumble into her bullet's path.

* * *

 

"Take half an hour." Rick was saying to everyone as they left his house. "but get ready cause we're following this up." His voice was serious, his scent strong. Daryl chewed his thumb and decided to find Evie before running an eye over the RV's engine bay. He was extremely worried about her, and he hadn't felt her for a while. That could mean anything and nothing, though. She could be asleep after her excitement in the morning, she could be in a drunken stupor which was always hard for him to read. He was like an animal that way, drunk people gave off odd signals.

Maggie was running towards him, face panic stricken.

"Evie's not home," she said in a rush, she'd gone to check on her, she really had been worried. Daryl found himself wishing Evie knew how loved she was. Maybe that would stop the nonsense drinking.

Maggie's magnolia scent was strong and succinct, coming off her in waves, almost cloying as she stood panic stricken.

"She's in a bad place, Daryl, she could be in danger." Daryl gave her a nod,

"Ok. Ok, I'll find her. Stall Rick, shouldn't be too hard, he's in a fairly good place." Maggie gave him a bright smile, sharing the joke. You didn't wake up from your first fuck in some time in a bad mood, and no matter how many strangers escaped your prison to roam your community, your smile didn't falter too quickly. Thinking on it, his oaky scent had had something else about it, something fresh and green.

"Find her. Bring her home safe" Maggie finished, and Daryl nodded again, heading quickly for the gate.

***

Eugene didn't know where she had headed, but confirmed that she had a rifle with silencer, and she went on foot, that was helpful. She couldn't have gone far, they'd been holed up with Jesus no more than an hour. But she was overwrought, and when she got a march on she could travel pretty quickly. She was also in a vulnerable state, and though he normally had no need to worry (not that it stopped him from doing so) right then he was on the verge of panic himself. There were bad people outside the walls, people who would knock you out and use you for their own gain, and through that may have been what led her out here, it was dangerous.

Maybe that was what she wanted.  
He wished he'd taken time, talked to her about the drinking, taken her to Denise himself.

He huffed a sigh as he bent down to a boot print in the mud. It was hers, headed east almost directly. What had she seen to draw her that way? What did she think she might see? No one went out that way. He couldn't hope to guess, he wouldn't dare.

Her scent was still lingering, clinging to the print like a memory that refused to fade. An aged photograph, a recurring dream. He inhaled her, eyes closed, and followed the direction her feet had lead.

The trail stopped dead no more than a few miles out, under an old oak. He knew she was in the branches, could hear her breathing, her heartbeat, smell her on the air. a few feet in front of him was a scattered and haphazard pile of the dead.  
He looked up at her in the tree, perched upon a branch like a damn bluebird.

She hadn't noticed him, was paying so little attention to anything around her that wasn't within her sights that she couldn't even feel him there beneath her. Hadn't heard him approach, which was fair enough, but to not be able to sense him, with their connection, their invisible thread holding them together even when apart, that was a red flag. A big fat blood-red flag.

He sighed and looked up into the leaves, and saw her sitting there tense, rifle sight to her eye, finger poised at the trigger. If he made her jump she'd pull off a shot, but did it matter? All that was out there was already dead, anyway, even if it didn't know it yet.

Fighting the urge to chew on his lip to sate his anger he called out, and sure enough she jumped and pulled the trigger, the rifle kicking back into her shoulder, making her put an arm out to steady herself.

"What the fuck, I could have shot you" she hissed down in to his upturned face. "What do you want?" She seemed so annoyed, perhaps because he had the ability to sneak up on her.

"I want ya to come home, Evie." She rolled her eyes at him, winding him up further. Now he did fold his lip into his mouth, worrying it between his teeth, so as not to lash out and do something he would absolutely regret.

"It's not safe." She said nonchalantly.

"Ya think it's safer here? Up a tree? Ya get surrounded and ya'll be stuck t' starve t'death, that what ya want?" She shrugged her shoulders at him, no doubt feeling his anger. He tried to feel her but was met with a solid wall. She was blocking him out, or she was trying to block everyone and everything out. It appeared to be working but it was a dangerous game she was playing.

"What if I had emerged from them trees?" He tried a different angle, pointing at the tree line where she aimed. "Think ya coulda stopped yaself?" He huffed a frustrated sigh when she didn't answer, just stared at him blankly like she didn't give a shit about anything. "Yer wound up like a fuckin' coiled spring. Ya coulda shot anyone when I came along"

Evie finally put the rifle across her lap and shoved her unruly red hair out of hair face with a huff of exasperation. The wall in front of her mind wavered, and Daryl thought perhaps he was breaking through.

"Why d'you think that is?" She asked with a sneer, a question that demanded no answer, but he gave one, anyway.

"Because ya've seen things ya can't not see." She flinched, closed her eyes, but didn't reply. "I wanna help Evie, but I need ya to let me." Evie shook her head at him.

* * *

 

She was helping. She was doing more than anyone else was. Keeping the place safe, they couldn't even keep their new prisoner under lock and key, too laid back. She shook her head.

"I'm doing fine as I am, I'm out here keeping everyone safe"

"By yaself?" Daryl's voice was soft, caressing her ears feather like, and she was almost drawn into it, before the truth whipped around her again.

You're doing what they can't Evie, he just wants you to go back and be moulded into a lacklustre follower like the rest.

"I'm not finished" she picked the rifle up again. "I'll be back, just not yet." After all, her celebratory drink was still waiting for her parched and wanting lips. Her lips parted at the thought, and she dragged them closed, turning her face away from Daryl lest he see her panting like a dog at the idea.

"I ain't leavin'." Daryl's voice drifted up to her. "Ya can't be out here alone. If ya need to be here, fine, but not alone."

"I've been fine alone before."

"Not since we started blowin' people up y'ain't!" Daryl snapped, losing all patience he shook the tree with a single slap of his hand. "We know more now, ya need to come down. I gotta go for a day, to a new place... I can't fuckin talk up to ya all mornin', will ya please come down? That dick we brought home's got ideas, good ones. There's more people than we thought. Safety in numbers, right?"

It was something they'd discussed before, When they first met. That they should stick together as they were both alone and alone was as good as suicide.

But now Evie knew different. Evie knew that Daryl needed no one but Daryl to protect him because he was a vampire, and no one could protect her but her because everyone was just sitting back on their haunches

"I know ya angry" Daryl cut her thoughts off. "I get it. I would be too," she looked down at him, looking up at her. All blue eyes and scruffy shoulder length hair. She could give in in a single heartbeat if she didn't guard herself hard enough, just at the sight of those eyes. "What happened was bad, unforgivable. N ya can't even tell her, I get that." Evie huffed a sigh and rolled her eyes. He could be talking about a million 'hers' in this world that she'd come across. All bitches, all hurting her and leaving before she could question it.

Freya, Sarah, even Beth by proxy, having to deal with Daryl after her demise. Her own damn mother had left before she could recognise her face.

She could be one of them... she looked out to the line of trees where a haphazard pile of the now, truly, dead lie, motionless, still.

She thought about the bottle in her bag, cold and unrelenting glass beneath her fingers.

She cried out, not even realising she was, and her voice rang in the air, low and rumbling but still sending roosting crows squawking in to the sky around them.

* * *

 

Movement caught Daryl's eye, down along the tree line. As Evie grunted into the morning sky around them a walker she hadn't quite finished off was trying to get back up and crawl towards the noise. Another stumbled into view through the dense overgrowth of weeds and bushes.

They needed to leave.

"Evie!" He hissed up at her "we need to leave. We need to go back." Evie looked down, and he gestured towards the walkers. She looked that way and a gasp escaped her, barely audible, but he felt it as clear as he felt her walls come crashing down, and with her blockade destroyed he could finally understand why she was such a mess.

"Daryl?" She asked quietly, fear clear in her every motion let alone in the shattered disarray of her mind. Her eyes were wide and worried, and Daryl took a glance towards the trees again where a small herd of the undead were shambling towards them. 


	53. Chapter 53

"Jump" he whispered, not taking his eyes from the danger, but holding his arms out to her. Evie didn't reply. "Chuck the damn bag n jump, Evie, I'll catch ya, I'll get ya home n safe." No reply, a mass of mixed up emotion coming from her. He tore his eyes away from the walkers and looked up into the tree.

"Fuck, Evie, c'mon!" His voice was loud, he was losing control, and the moans of the dead became a little more eager. Evie fussed and worried at her pack and he lost patience, leaping up to the branch she was perched on, she lost her balance and dropped the bag as he grabbed her waist so she didn't fall to the ground with it.

"No!" A yell more than a hiss, Evie lurched forward in his arms and he squeezed her a little tighter. She bent almost double under her own force against him.

The pack hit the ground, with a surprising crash, the shatter of glass, and shortly after, the distinct smell of alcohol hit his nose and filled his lungs. 

For a split second he almost let her go. For a nano second in time he wanted to. If she wanted to throw everything away for a damn drink...

He couldn't worry about that, he needed to get her back to Alexandria. She was snivelling and sniffing in his ear as he carried her, wrapped in his arms and he ran home.

"I'm sorry" she whispered over and over to him, as they left her bag, and the walkers, far behind them.

* * *

 

As the gates loomed ahead of them Evie stopped babbling. She felt as if she'd sobered up, the shock, the fear, gone, and all in its place was a steely coldness. She could feel that Daryl was pissed, he held her gently and didn't utter a word as he ran with her in his arms, but she knew. It was in the sideways glances, the rhythm of his heart beating against her chest, in the steadiness of his breath despite the speed at which they moved.  
She thought she should be the angry one. She'd earned that drink and a single movement from him had destroyed it. If he had just waited.

He put her down on her feet and looked her over, she avoided his eyes.

"Ya can walk from here?" He asked and she shrugged

"'S'not like I was injured." She answered sullenly, and started walking casually toward the gates.  
She scrubbed her face with her hands and cursed herself for her blithering apologies. He knew she wasn't sorry, she knew she couldn't lie to him convincingly, so what had that been about? She glanced over her shoulder at him, he was walking slowly, fists clenching and unclenching by his sides. She didn't need to be able to read his mind to know he was monumentally angry at her for all of this. She hoped he knew she felt the same, albeit for different reasons.

She huffed and turned back to the gates. He said he had to go somewhere, be gone all day, maybe he had too much on his mind to have even noticed, maybe he would go and get over it while he was there. Wherever there was.

She stopped and turned to him just as Rosita noticed them both coming and nodded down to Eugene to open the gate.

"Where are you going, anyway?" Daryl's eyes narrowed and he was clearly not up for answering, Maybe that was ok, perhaps she just didn't want to know anyway. The gate rattled on its rusty wheels as it opened, and Evie turned to see Eugene's face looking at her solemnly. She frowned, and his face didn't change as he stepped aside to let her in. She went to speak to him, thought better of it, then came face to face with the new stranger in town.

She stopped dead in her tracks. Daryl had her rifle thrown over his shoulder but she still had her knife and handgun. Her hand went to her hip automatically, though she left it there, in the air, like some kind of western gunslinger.

"Hi," the stranger said, his voice overly calm and warm. "I don't think we've met, I'm Paul Rovia." He held his hand out to Evie and she looked at it with a sneer.

"Have you been watching us?" She asked him shrilly, "Daryl said you know things, are you here to hurt my family?" The strangers faced changed, he put down his offered hand and looked at her sadly, before looking at those around him.

"No, I... I want to broaden your world by sharing it with other people, there are other communities just like this one..." he seemed at a loss, Evie continued to sneer at him, hand still poised over her weapon. She wished she had the rifle, now slung across Daryl's back, that would really give this guy pause for thought.

She jumped when Daryl's hand rested gently on her shoulder, almost grabbed the handgun from its hip holster and shot him. Daryl's warm hand stayed put, though, and he said very quietly.

"He means us no harm, Evie, he's here to help."

* * *

 

She was vibrating, physically shaking, her body felt tense under his hand, and volatile. She felt she was in grave danger and Daryl's heart hammered at the thought of her feeling that way, surrounded by her loved ones who meant her no harm, who would, in fact, put themselves in harm's way for her as she would for them.

But she clearly felt no one was taking anything seriously enough, she was hyper vigilant, seeing enemies where there were none, sensing danger where she was safest. He tried to ease her back to him, tugging gently on the arm he held, not wanting to be too rough lest she fell apart. He was at a loss of what to do with her, her traumatic stress disorder something he didn't know how to deal with as he had his own demons, her drinking something he couldn't sympathise with after seeing so many people fall due to drink.

It was something he would normally discuss with others, but there was no time. As their world grew larger it surely grew more haunted, and that was the last thing Evie needed. He chewed his lip and tensed his jaw, Evie finally turning her eyes to him.

"What?" She asked, distant and afraid, sounding like she'd woken from a terrible dream. Daryl looked around for help.

"Evie?" A quiet and shy voice, Tara's girlfriend the doctor. Denise who had saved Carl's life, who could have whatever she wanted, even though Daryl didn't manage to get her the soda she wanted, still, there she was, wanting to help. Hadn't Tara said she was a psychiatrist before? "Come on, Evie come and get a cold drink with me. Leave these guys to do what they do." Denise steered Evie away through the crowd that had gathered at her yelling, images in their minds no doubt of Sasha's outburst long ago at Deanna's party.

Daryl watched as Evie turned her head towards him, he gave her a simple nod, but his jaw was still tense as he watched her disappear into Tara and Denise's home. 

"She's suffering?" Jesus said gently, and Daryl turned his attention to the stranger.

"Ain't nothin' more'n ya'd expect, comin' from where we have." He grunted, still not at ease with the guy himself, no matter how safe and harmless he felt. He'd escaped handcuffs and a prison cell, for christ's sake. Jesus took the hint and left it, Rick was rounding everyone up to go. Daryl couldn't dwell on Evie's state of mind. It was the hardest thing to do, but he had to leave her behind. He couldn't help anyone if he wasn't fully present.

"You found her?" Maggie came out of the RV as Daryl approached it, and he nodded shallowly.

"Up a damn tree, shootin' walkers"

"Sasha..."

"Sh'ain't Sasha." Daryl didn't mean to cut Maggie off so aggressively, she was just concerned how for Evie, but the comparison was pointless to him, they were different people.

"I know." She said softly "I understand."

"She's with Denise."

"Well," Maggie smiled warmly "that's a start."

* * *

 

Denise handed Evie a glass of water and sat opposite her.

"How are you feeling?" She asked pointedly, and Evie rolled her eyes, running her hand up the glass she'd been given, collecting the condensation. 

"Fine" she said bluntly. "How I'm supposed to be, right? What is this, free counselling? I know what you are, Denise, I know what you're doing." She picked up the glass and drank a long swallow as she watched Denise squirm. She liked Denise. She was stuttery and nervous, but she was honest. The only thing was, in that moment, she was being slack like everyone else.

"We're all on the same team, we want the same things." Denise started, the sudden change in Evie again not something she'd missed, but Evie was shaking her head before Denise had even finished.

"Do we? I want to go out there and kill every damn one of those mother fuckers, every god damn walker and each and every person who thinks they can steal from my family. Who thinks they can endanger us, who thinks they can hurt us and not have to pay for it." Evie was hardly aware that she was pointing out of the window, yelling. She stood up abruptly and her chair crashed over backwards, hitting the floor with a clatter, loud enough to make her jump, and Denise too.

"But people want the same, your family want the same that's why they're going out there today, Daryl and Rick, Glenn, Michonne and Maggie..." Evie snorted softly, cutting Denise off. "What?" She asked, eyebrow up high on her forehead. Evie shook her head gently, still standing. Denise didn't get it, she was one of the weak ones, and she was going to die.  
But Evie couldn't tell her that. She wouldn't listen.

"They're going out there with a stranger in the hopes of making fucking friends" she spat venomously. "The only people we can count on is ourselves. I'll be surprised if any of them even come back." She turned to walk out, fed up with everyone just not getting it. She was angry, her breathing fast and shallow.

"Evie," Denise said behind her, and Evie stopped just short of the door. "It's ok to not be fine. It's ok to be scared" this earned another soft exhale from Evie, but Denise continued, unaffected by bravado. "If you want to talk, I'm here. We all are." Evie faced the door a long moment before leaving, composing herself and setting her face, not once even thinking of turning back to Denise.

* * *

 

When Negan's name came up again Daryl physically balked. He hoped no one had noticed. He turned and looked out of the window at the livestock strolling around like it wasn't the end of the world, instead of showing his face to his family who could read him like a damned book. He twisted his fingers in the blind and tried to listen to what was happening around him and not think of Evie. It was hard going, she was an utter mess when they left her behind. When he left her behind.

He had so far successfully blocked her out during this trip, and with the fight out front, the blood, he'd still so far managed. The prick, Gregory, had gotten his back up, he smelled like alcohol and that made him think of Evie briefly, but when Abraham asked him about Rick and Michonne he admitted to himself he wasn't in the here and now. He had shrugged, asked Abe if he thought shit was settled. Because he didn't think so, not right then, with Evie in a state and a dead man in the floor outside, whose blood had smelled like everything Daryl had dreamt of when he was on his own in the woods, nothing was settled. Probably never would be. Maybe Denise had gotten through.

Maybe.

Daryl was getting fed up with the chatter.

"If we go back, get ya man, kill Negan, will ya hook us up? We want food, medicine, n one'a them cows." Rick shot him a look, but Daryl ignored it. They needed shit, Evie needed shit, they'd all been through too much to help these strangers out for nothing.

Again there was a gentle tug in his head, similar to something he'd felt before, when D and his girl were with him. The name Negan seemed to bring that on, and something didn't feel right about it. He pushed himself away from the window, frustrated at himself for not knowing exactly what it was or what it meant.

Later, what felt like hours but was maybe only one or two at most, on the journey back to Alexandria he was handed the sonogram picture of Glenn and Maggie's baby. A little peanut floating in a grainy black and white cavern. He smiled to himself. They'd be great parents. His mind fluttered back to Evie again and he sighed. They'd never have kids of their own. Couldn't possibly have them. He wondered if that, along with what he was, helped in Evie's fall from sanity. He huffed again and passed the picture along, twisting on the bench seat and watching the world whizz by as they made their way home to make more plans to get Negan and save the damn world.

*****

"She would not take no for an answer." Eugene said after he closed the gate as Daryl jogged over coming out of the RV. He'd seen that Evie was pacing up on the wall, looking agitated.

"Get Olivia" Rick called out behind them. Daryl knew he would want a meeting shortly. He didn't have too much time. 

"Evie!" He yelled up to her. It was the stupidest place for her to be. The worst thing was surely to leave her in charge of a weapon, when she was so damn jittery. He heard Denise come walking up behind him but paid her no mind, instead taking to the ladder and climbing up fast to the lookout platform. 

"Evie" he said, calmly as he could. She'd stopped pacing as he climbed up to her, and she now faced him, the rifle held loosely in both her hands.

"I know what you're gonna say. I'm not coming down, Daryl, I'm not ready." Daryl nodded, cocked his head slightly to one side.

"That ain't what I wanna say." He said quietly. "Rick's callin' a meetin', wants everyone in the church to talk about findin' n killin' these people, that Negan I told ya 'bout. We're gonna kill 'im, Evie, n we'll be a helluva lot safer." She lowered the rifle a little and watched Daryl solemnly.

"Can I come?" Daryl felt his face fall instantly to serious.

"I don't think Rick'll let ya."

"Rick?" She questioned, not believing him, one of her eyebrows arched accusing.

"I want ya safe" Daryl conceded. "I jus' wanna know ya safe." Evie's shoulders sagged and she shook her head, eyes glistening.

"I don't know why I'm like this." He could suddenly feel her, for the first time fully in days, he could feel her emotions. She was more open to him in her state of vulnerability, and she was sad and lonely. Daryl wanted to engulf her in his arms and hug all the shit away, but he couldn't bring himself to. Instead he held a hand out to her, gesturing she take it.

"We wanna sort this out, we will. Come to the meetin', it might make ya feel better if ya hear what Rick has to say." Evie visibly swallowed and nodded a hurried bob of her head. Her whole demeanour had changed from bold and offensive to meek, like she was in a daze, and had no idea how she'd got to the top of the wall, and had just woken up there.

Denise was still waiting at the bottom of the ladder.

"You think that's wise?" She accused, suddenly harnessing an ability to speak plainly which Daryl had never heard from her. He watched as Evie climbed down the last few rings of the ladder, ensuring she was safe. "She needs talking therapy. She needs help. Telling her about the dangers outside-"

"Don't talk like she ain't here, Doc."

"Evie," Denise turned to her, noticing she was herself again. "I really think you should skip the meeting, and come and have a talk with me." She turned to Daryl and whispered as though Evie couldn't hear. "Ideally she needs meds that I do not have." Evie frowned, and Daryl felt her confusion.

"Meds?" It was heartbreaking, and elating all at once, being able to feel her down played the actual emotion he could feel. He reached out and their hands met, fingers entwining around each others.  
Evie turned to him, and he tried a smile which felt wrong on his face.

"No meds," he said quietly, roughly. "Maybe we try talkin'. It seems to come n go." Evie was nodding, but her breathing was fast and shallow. Daryl squeezed her hand, but panic was rising in her quickly and he wished he knew what to say, what to do, to make her feel strong and stable and safe. "Ya wanna come to the church, or ya wanna go with Denise? I need ya to tell me, Evie, I need you to be the one to choose." Evie looked at him, held his gaze with her green eyes, red curls covering her body slightly. She was still breathing too shallowly. She nodded.

"I'll come with you" she said quietly "I'll come to church."


	54. Chapter 54

"It's the last thing she needs" Denise said pointedly as Daryl sent Evie on her way to the church ahead of him. He turned to the doctor and gave her a small shrug.

"'S'what she wants." He said simply. 

"There are times, in her head, that she wants everyone dead except the people she loves." Denise threw back. "Do you realise that she could turn the other way and decide she's the problem?" She paused for effect, waiting for the penny to drop. "That the world is better without her in it." Daryl was stunned to silence. Suicide? The thought made his chest tighten. Not after that woman, surely, not after witnessing...She weren't that weak.

But neither was Beth. Where was she now?

He chewed his cheek and glared at Denise.

"You didn't realise she was just on the verge of a panic attack, either." Denise accused.

"Wait, Denise, slow down." He said quietly. "Suicide? Panic attacks?"

"She has PTSD which is showing itself with hyper vigilance, and irrational panic"

"Ya think it's irrational?" Denise shook her head.

"No, no but that's what it's called. I meant it when I said the last thing she needs is to be in that church." Denise huffed a sigh and crossed her arms. "Little birdie told me you've been sleeping on the couch"

"That ain't none'a ya business" Daryl snapped, hating himself for it instantly. She was to be treated like a hero, not yelled at by folk. She saved lives, Carl's life, they needed her. Denise wasn't perturbed, though.

"Not what she needs. She needs support." Daryl looked at his feet. She was right, of course, he just couldn't do it. He wasn't the one, and didn't that make him feel shitty? He chewed on his lip, uncomfortable with this whole conversation like he was Evie's carer or something.

"Can't, right now. She's been drinkin' n I can't be part of that." Denise nodded slowly even as Daryl shook his head forlornly. She patted Daryl's arm, and felt him stiffen beneath her touch.

"Ok. Ok, look, I'll deal with the alcohol, but Evie needs every ounce of support. If she feels like she is being left to deal with everything alone that's when she'll wonder how bad she is for the world," she shrugged. "You love her, right?" It was Daryl's turn to shrug, increasingly on edge with the whole thing, Denise talking too much and making too many assumptions about his relationship with Evie. He needed to be in that church when Rick started talking, there was so much going on right then that Evie was, he couldn't believe it, but Evie wasn't the most important thing happening. He could keep her safe, that was important now. Wasn't any use fixing her if she was going to be killed by Negan and his men.

"I know you do. I know you want what's best. I don't say much, but, ya know... I'm pretty observant." Daryl snorted and gave her a shallow nod before excusing himself in a mix of huffs and grunts to follow where Evie had led into the church. Denise watched him go before shaking her head, and going to find Tara.

* * *

 

Evie watched as Rick told the people who had bothered to show up at the church about his plan, the idea to attack Negan before he attacked them. She could get on board with that. She listened to the low rumbles around her, disagreement, concern and confusion. Daryl was sitting next to her, leaning forward intently, she wondered if he heard it better than she did, if he could pick out who was for and who was against.   
Rick was leaving it in their hands to choose the way forward. She understood, but these people were the worst to choose everyone's fate.

"We kill them all." Rick said firmly, and she felt Daryl move beside her, straighten up and pay attention. "We don't all have to kill." Evie couldn't help the huff of air that escaped her. "But," Rick cast his eyes over her briefly, "if people are gonna stay here, they have to accept it."

As people dissipated, and the church began to empty, Evie stayed seated. To her surprise Daryl didn't disappear with everyone else, and Rick patted his shoulder, eyeing Evie carefully, as he left. He didn't relax, he didn't sit back and spread himself out. He remained hunched forward, elbows on his knees, back bent, facing the stained glass behind the altar.

She sensed he wanted to say something, could almost feel the words tumbling around in his head as he decided what order they should be.

She wanted to speak, say something, anything, before he stood and left her there alone in the cold amongst the pews and bibles.

She opened her mouth to do so, but he cut her off without even looking in her direction.

"Don't." Was all he said, a single word, low and rough and full of feeling. Full of hurt. She could feel it now, rolling off him slowly, like rain down a window pane. That sluggish speed making it all the worse. She wanted cry, overwhelmed by that feeling.

"I don't know why I'm like this" she said, barely holding it together enough not to let her voice crack. "I... I don't seem to have any control." She thought about moving closer, but was glued to the spot. She wanted to reach out and hold him, but couldn't find the courage to do so. Daryl took a breath like he might speak and her heart fluttered. She wanted nothing more than to share with him, to close the gap between them at least a little before he marched off into the night and possibly... she couldn't even think it.

He sighed again, all the way from his boots, and leant back on the pew they shared.

"I don't know if I can do this, Evie."

* * *

 

He daren't look at her, he wanted to speak his mind, and looking at her would destroy any chance of that, any chance of being concise and strong. 

"What?" She asked quickly, and he felt her move closer as she asked, an urgency to her voice, coaxing him to continue his thought. But she didn't feel eager, deep inside she was petrified of what he might say next, and he knew he had to choose his words very carefully.

He'd never been good at that.

"Tonight, we're gonna head out n kill these people while they sleep." He took a long breath and surprised himself with how watery it was, how unsteady. "I need'a be... present... for that. I can't if ya in my head, worryin' me sick n takin' over my thoughts." He chanced a glance over at her, and was thankful she was suddenly very interested in her hands. She wrung them together incessantly. He wished she would stop and say something instead.

"This isn't about me." She said quietly to her hands as though she'd read his mind. "I'm not trying to make it about me." She turned to him and he looked away. "I'm sorry." She said earnestly. "I don't know why I'm like this, I don't wanna be like this." Daryl closed his eyes for a moment, and when he opened them they met hers instantly.

"Jus' promise me ya'll stay indoors, get'n early night," he paused, "n don't take a drink, while I'm gone." Evie nodded briskly, her red curls bouncing around her.

"I won't." She shook her head, her scent, barely there in her mixed up state, lighted under his nose for a second. "I won't. You just, you just make sure you come back to me." She moved forward and grabbed his hands in hers, squeezed them, but never took her eyes from his. "You come back to me, Daryl." He fought not to look away. She hadn't been so much herself in days, since they watched that woman drain herself in front of them. He gave her a nod, a single head dip.

"Ain't gettin' rid'a me so easily" he said quietly, meeting her eyes again, he pulled one of his hands from hers and moved her hair from her face, out of her eyes. "Ya jus' try'n keep ya head, n I c'n keep mine." She leant her forehead against his, her skin felt cold against him. He couldn't fight it any longer, couldn't tear himself away. His hand was still in her hair, and he firmed it up there, gripping at her curls and pushing his lips against hers.

* * *

 

It caught Evie off guard. She stiffened and almost pulled away as his lips found hers, his hand fisting in her hair and pulling her into him. She wasn't expecting this, after days of being so very separate following months of being one. She expected more of before, hints and tips from Daryl that he was still very much falling for her, but unable to be with her while she destroyed herself. Unable to watch as she spiralled out of control.

She wrapped her arms around him, snaked them under his and spread her hands on his back as he edged closer to her on the bench.

But she pulled away as his mouth prised her lips apart, as his tongue sought out hers. He stared at her breathlessly, dark blue eyes glistening.

"I'm with ya." He said darkly "whatever this is, we'll get through it, together." Evie nodded numbly, wanting to cry again. This was all she had wanted, she closed her eyes and told him.

"I've been so lonely." Daryl shook his head and unwound his hand from her hair, chasing an escaped tear down her cheek with his fingers so softly.

"Ain't alone." He said, holding her chin and turning her face up to his. "I'm sorry I left ya, ain't leavin' again." And then his lips were on hers again, softer and sweeter than before. Earnest and honest and intensely he kissed her, as her fears and doubts melted away, if only for a few moments as they reconnected. Daryl broke it off, pulled away from her, ran his hand over her auburn ringlets and pressed his mouth into a thin straight line.

"I have work to do. Plans to make" he spoke softly, apologetically, and Evie smiled sadly, wishing they could stay in the church and kiss forever.

"I know" she sniffed gently. "Will you walk me home?"

*****

Evie was astounded to learn that even Carol, Maggie and Gabriel were going that night to the compound. Each, for their own reasons, she had assumed would stay. Knowing she'd be on her own and surrounded by Alexandrians, the only person in her family who stayed behind someone she still didn't have great connection with, made her feel very lost. Eugene, who had lied and cheated his way to get to safety in the first place wasn't her most favourite of people, and they certainly were not close.

Daryl had again promised that they would be back in one piece, but Evie still had a heavy feeling in her stomach she couldn't shift. The difficulty was knowing if the feeling of impending doom was real or part of her- she didn't even have a word for it - Illness? Problem?

Denise offered her a room for the night, and she sensed that Daryl had asked her to do so.

"You don't want to be in the house all alone" she'd said, though no one had offered Eugene or Carl room and board. Evie also noted that Denise not only locked the front door, but pocketed the key, that single action hurt, a lot. She felt untrusted, penalised for something she couldn't seem to help. 

"How about some dinner?" She asked with a smile as she turned away from the door, as if she hadn't just trapped Evie inside with her against her will.

"I'm not really hungry." Evie managed at length, "Don't go to any effort for me." Denise appeared again wiping her hands on a kitchen cloth.

"It's a tinned tuna casserole, it's no effort, believe me." She said with a smile, flinging the dish cloth over her shoulder and pushing her glasses up on her nose.

*****

"I hear Abraham and Rosita split up." Denise said. They'd been sitting eating in silence, the atmosphere a little awkward.   
Evie pushed food around her plate and sighed.

"Gossip? That's what we've come to?" Denise let out a small laugh, seeing humour where Evie didn't intend any.

"Would you like a fresh drink?" Denise tried instead.

"Anything stronger than water?" Evie asked, knowing the doctor would say no, expecting the sad look in her eyes.

"Ok." Denise put her fork down, "how are you feeling now?" Evie shrugged.

"Trapped" it was the first word to mind, brought on by the locked door. "Sad. Confused." She looked at the doctor, expecting some kind of medical professional reply.

"I can assure you that everyone here has felt the same. Especially in your group." Denise took a drink of water and regarded Evie very carefully. "I was the same, when Pete died I was totally overwhelmed by having to be the doctor." She picked up her fork again. "I wanted to run and hide, but I faced my fears, with a little help from Tara and Eugene, and now look at me, a regular surgeon." Evie smiled, she was sure this was therapy. It felt like a chat but...

She felt that trapped feeling again, claustrophobia bearing down on her along with everything else.

"You locked the door" she said, looking at her food which she still hadn't touched. "You locked the door and pocketed the key, and that doesn't make me feel safe, it makes me think no one trusts me. It makes me feel caged and cornered." Denise swallowed her mouthful of food.

"Did you walk in here planning your escape?" Evie frowned.

"No, I know my ways out." She answered instantly. Denise nodded.

"Ok. So you know you can still get out, so you're not trapped. I started locking the door first after the wolves, and then once tara moved in, because... being disturbed... you know..." the doctor pinked prettily, and Evie chewed her lip, not wanting to embarrass Denise any further.

"Oh" she said, not managing to find any words better. "I've been feeling a lot of stuff that I'm not sure is real" she pushed her plate away, really not hungry. "Things I've never felt before. Lost, claustrophobic, alone even surrounded by my loved ones"

"We don't have to talk about this now." Evie nodded, not looking up from the table

"Yeah, we do. I do." She sighed "I feel like I'm losing my mind."


	55. Chapter 55

Daryl had succeeded in keeping Evie off his mind all night, he'd sliced a man's throat from behind, slinking up stealthily and unheard, and he hadn't flinched. He'd gotten into the compound with Rick by his side and taken out saviour after sleeping saviour without so much as a second thought.

It was when they stopped being despicable and deplorable that it all hit him. Outside in the fresh air, the alarm finally silent, and light just coming through the grey clouds, the world taking on an eerie dim and silent colouring as the sun made its appearance. It struck him that this was what he was made for, a silent flash in the night, creeping up on people and killing them, and it also hit him just how much he hated being that creature, that version of himself.  Like a slap in the face he realised just what he and his family had done, and he sank to his knees in the dewy grass, his pants soaking up the morning droplets, he was mentally exhausted. He tried not to think how he would feel if someone did the same at Alexandria. Tried and failed.

On top of everything that was obviously wrong with what they were doing, there was something else. A familiar pull he still couldn't quite put his finger on. Something smelled wrong, and felt even more so. That feeling he'd had with the assholes that stole his stuff, the feeling that made him sit up and pay attention. Whenever there was Negan, there was that odd tug. He wished he knew what it was so he could fix it. He was vaguely aware that Michonne was talking, knew he should be listening, but a sudden unexpected sound had him standing and turning to see his bike come flying out of the compound.

"Sonovvabitch!" He yelled, thoughts and feelings forgotten, chasing it and the rider down as Rosita shot the thieving prick off it. She didn't kill him, that was good, he wanted to ask the little bastard where he got the bike. Rick demanded to know who the guy was, what he wanted, they all aimed guns at him and waited for the call to do it.

Instead the radio on the guys belt crackled, and an unfamiliar voice came, sending the knot already in the pit of Daryl's stomach into a tight ball of twisted pain. Because with that voice came that pull again, and with that pull came a feeling of impending doom he didn't much care for.

"We have a Maggie and a Carol" that voice said, and it was enough to push him over the edge. He dropped his gun as Rick and Glenn got the guy from the compound to standing and demanded to know where this woman was taking their friends. Carol, and Maggie? They should never have been out there.   
He did find himself thankful Evie had stayed behind, instantly regretting the thought as guilt ripped through him. He grabbed the little prick saviour's collar and yelled in his face.

"Where are they, ya bike theivin' prick? Where're they takin' them girls?" He pulled his knife out, and Rick gave him a look that was meant to calm him. Daryl chewed his cheek and gave in, pulling the knife away from the saviour's throat and opting instead to yank his hands behind him and tie them with a rag he found in his own pocket.

"You'll come with us" Rick drawled, snatching the bald man's arm from Daryl, and pushing the saviour roughly in front of him. "C'mon, go!" He shoved again and the guy, Primo, apparently, fell over his own feet, refusing to say anything more, to even grunt, as he was rough housed and forced to move.

* * *

 

Evie was standing at the bedroom window, glaring out at Alexandria in the quiet greyness of the early morning when Denise knocked on the bedroom door once and walked in.

"You up?" She asked before she noticed, and Evie nodded slightly.

"They're not back." She said, not turning from the window. "Daryl promised, and its light, where are they?" She turned then, and Denise was watching her wide eyed.

"It's _barely_ light, they'll get here." She smiled a little too forcefully for Evie's liking. She turned back to the window with a huff. She watched the street, unable to see the gate from where she stood, staring at the grey hues from the little light the clouds were letting through. She couldn't feel Daryl. Was that good or bad? She wondered if he had put up the wall he had before, when she was menstruating. She cringed inwardly. That was a bad few days.

"Oatmeal?" Denise asked behind her, and Evie sighed.

"I'm not-"

"Hungry?" Denise cut her off "You didn't eat last night, and as your doctor, I advise you to join me for some oatmeal." Evie snorted, thinking _or what?_ But she said nothing, just turned and followed Denise down to the kitchen, where the previous night's washing piled high in the sink, and echoes of their intense conversation hung awkwardly in the air.

_"One minute I'm fine, and the next I'm completely irrational, and I know I am, but I can't stop, even if I wanted to."_

_"And after?"_

_"It's like... waking up. Like I was dreaming all the bad stuff and I've woken up to find myself acting it out"_

Denise put a bowl of oatmeal in front of Evie on the table, making her jump from her memories.

"Thanks" she mumbled, picking up the spoon and turning it so the gloop splatted back into the bowl.

"Yeah, ok" Denise sat opposite Evie. "It looks like crap but it tastes good, and it's good for you." Evie tried a spoonful, and it really wasn't as bad as it looked. She eyed the washing up in the sink.

"I'll wash up, after" she said, sounding distant to herself.

_"I was an alcoholic and I think it's creeping back."_

_"You're never not an alcoholic, Evie."_

_"Well, I guess. I hadn't had a drink since before... everything."  
"Maybe it reminds you of a slightly better time."_

Evie sighed and scooped up a second spoonful of the goo Denise had made for her, out of the pure kindness of her heart. Why couldn't she just be grateful for everything? She had a roof over her head and walls around her, she had her family and she was alive. Why wasn't that enough? She scraped the last of the oatmeal onto her spoon and ate it, reaching her hand out for Denise's already empty bowl. Denise gave her a confused look.

"You cooked so I clean, them's the rules." Evie said with a shrug, taking the bowl and heading for the sink.

It felt odd. Standing at the window, washing up and looking out to the small un-fenced backyard. Like something out of a movie or a dream. It didn't feel familiar, domesticity, not any more. She worked through it automatically, but it was still so strange. Washing up, cleanliness, none of that mattered to the creatures just waiting to tear you limb from limb for breakfast. Her stomach lurched a little, and she wished she'd stuck to her guns and not eaten the damn oatmeal.

* * *

 

Daryl looked up at the building appearing on the horizon. It was the place, he knew, he could smell it, and that feeling was there the instant he laid eyes on it. The little tug, like a word on the tip of his tongue, a memory he couldn't quite reach. Which was ridiculous, he had a photographic memory.

"'S'on fire." He noted, sitting up a little straighter next to Rick, who was driving. Rick looked up, nodded at the smoke billowing into the sky, and laid his foot a little heavier on the throttle. The tension in the vehicle thickened as everyone sat a little taller and seemed to hold their breath. Maggie and Carol were within reach, grasping distance, and yet their fate was still unknown. It left each and every one of them on tenterhooks.

They still didn't even know if they had got Negan, and the guy tied up in the trunk wasn't talking, nothing useful spilling from his now swollen mouth. Daryl stretched his fingers out at the thought, the grazes on his knuckles not at all sore and pretty much healed, he fisted his hand in the hopes of splitting the skin and keeping up his damned human charade.

Rick was standing very heavily on the throttle now, the car accelerating pointlessly, and Daryl reached out and lay his hand on Rick's shoulder gently.

"Rick." He said softly, and the car slowed, Rick nodding stiffly. He didn't have to say anymore. There was no point getting the girls if they had no fuel to get home, there was no use rushing only to crash and burn on the way. The girls were fine, as much as he could tell, they were fine. It wasn't like with Evie, who he physically had to push from his mind, but they were close enough as a family that he could feel something if he reached out purposefully. They were sad, depleted and tired, but they were ok.

But the proof of the pudding was in the eating, and as the shutter rolled up Carol all but fell into his arms, she looked lost, broken, and he felt how desperately she gripped onto him, how hard she squeezed her rosary. He could smell the blood dripping through her fingers from her palm but ignored it, ignored the strength of that clean linen like scent. He also ignored the strong feeling he was getting from the building, the smell of charred flesh mingled with rot and that damned feeling in his mind of something he should know but couldn't quite grasp. Instead his mind wandered. Now two of the people he felt closest to were lost, and he didn't know how to help either of them. It was typical that as Rick emerged from his experiences rather unscathed, that others should fall into the downward spiral. As the girls got fixed, if that were even possible, who would be next?

Finally he let Carol go, and Rick shot the man who had had Daryl's bike, and they were on their way to fetch it again before heading home once more. Back to reality, the new reality.

On the ride home, finally alone, he thought about all the new types of monsters they were facing. The walkers, other humans, themselves. It occurred to him that the only difference from their old world was the walkers, everything else was the same, just magnified in the lack of structure and authority. He kicked the bike down a gear and swerved gently around a geek with no clothes, grey and rotting flesh hanging from its bones. It reached lazily towards him, but he was gone before it could snag him.

He never thought he'd worry about authority, he shook his head, laughing to himself, kicked the bike down another head and revved hard to catch up with the other vehicles.

* * *

Evie had been put to work in the infirmary with Denise, reorganising some pamphlets which had somehow got mixed up. It was busy work, Evie knew it, but she was glad of it. She could do it without thinking, and it stopped her being worried about what may or may not have happened at the compound. It didn't completely skip her attention that there were pamphlets for PTSD and Alcoholism amongst others for pregnancy and healthy eating.

When she heard the motorbike, her hand flew to her hip to find her handgun missing, Denise had requested she leave it behind, which she had, and now panic gripped her in its cold hard hands as she realised all she had was her knife. She grabbed it, instead, and moved to the front window, using her free hand to make a gap in the blind, pulling down one of the plastic strips with a single finger so she could see without being seen. She narrowed her eyes and held her breath so she wouldn't steam up the window. Eyeing gate, which she could just see, she watched, stunned, as Eugene roll it open.

Daryl's bike came into view, and she gasped. Them. The ones that cheated Daryl out of his bike and crossbow. She watched them a moment, her eyes narrowing to slits and her face sneering involuntarily. She flexed her fingers on the hand holding the knife and headed for the infirmary door. They couldn't get away with what they had done. Breathing hard and trying to remain calm she edged the door open, knife up by ear like she might find walkers on the street. But there were only people, Daryl's bike and some cars. She wondered who had led them here, who they had followed to find Alexandria. Daryl? Someone else?

"Evie?" She stopped, having not realised she was creeping forward, close to the buildings, in the shadows the now setting sun laid around the town. She straightened as Daryl called her name, sitting astride his bike. Frowning, not sure what to believe, and erring on the side of caution she walked slowly forward, knife in her hand at her side. She wondered if they had done it, if Negan was dead, and if now maybe they were a little safer. It was no time to become complacent.

"Evie" he said again, stepping off the bike and resting it on the kickstand. She tilted her head at him.

"You got your bike back." She said, not a question, just an observation. He nodded, watching as Carol dashed passed Evie to her own home.

"Yeah. Y'ok?" Evie put her knife back in its pouch, not entirely sure why she'd pulled it out in the first place. She felt on edge, but she didn't know why. Her heart beat slightly too fast, and she felt like she couldn't breathe quite deep enough.  "Hey, y'ok?" Daryl asked more sharply, drawing her to look at him directly. Her heart rate slowed and her breathing evened out. He had that effect on her, his dark blue eyes searching hers, his slight ethereal glow still tight and close to him. Not lighting up the world like it should be. Something was wrong, she didn't know what. She didn't know in that confusing moment if she wanted to.

"Yeah, yeah." She said distantly "What happened?" It was like waking from a dream, a nightmare. She was aware she had been scared, panicked, but couldn't put her finger on why. She wasn't anymore, Daryl made her feel safe. Daryl narrowed his eyes and gave her a single nod, seemingly still angry and trying to keep a lid on it.

"We'll talk, but Rick's gonna wanna meetin', some shit went down we weren't expectin', this is bigger'n we thought"


	56. Chapter 56

Evie slept alone again. Daryl went to speak with Rick, the meeting apparently just between the two of them, maybe Michonne too. He didn't come home, and Evie crept up the stairs late that night so as not to disturb Glenn and Maggie, who both looked like they'd had the worst possible day.

Waking up alone was something she was getting used to, but when she didn't find Daryl on the couch she wondered if he had stayed with Rick all night. What could be so pressing to discuss it was too late to walk next door? It made her feel very alone.

She was descending the porch steps, thinking of lighting up a cigarette, when Denise was strolling over. Evie watched as Carol walked away from Rick and Michonne's, leaving Daryl sitting on the stoop, cleaning his hands on a dirty rag. His glow clinging tightly to him, his face set on pissed.

"Hey, Evie, how are you this morning?" Instantly on the defensive, Evie assumed Denise wanted to talk about her issues. She shook her head firmly.

"Not up to talking" she said "can we save therapy for another time?" Denise looked a little surprised at her reaction, she shook her head, wrung her hands

"Er, actually, I wanted to ask you something else." She tucked a few strands of hair behind her ear and ummed a few more times. "And Daryl?" It wasn't a question, but her nervousness made it sound like it was. Evie frowned, not knowing if Daryl would want to spend any time with her. He'd clearly stayed away for a reason, it showed in how he sat there on the stoop just feet away, and hadn't even looked at her. What the hell had happened between them that things were allowed to get that bad?

She didn't know. She huffed a sigh and Denise was already heading for Daryl, so she caught up.

"I saw it as I was heading out of DC," she was explaining. "Edison's Apothecary and Boutique." She shrugged her shoulders and shuffled her feet shyly. "It's just a little gift shop, but if it really is an apothecary it'll have drugs." She looked between Evie and Daryl. She must have seen something she didn't like in their faces, and her own face fell.

"How ya know they still got 'em?" Daryl asked, and Denise shrugged again.

"I don't. I want to check. I want to help." She sighed "you and Evie are free today,"

"Evie ain't goin' out."

"Excuse me?!" Evie interjected. How dare he? "How much time ya spent out there, anyway?" Daryl asked, ignoring Evie completely, and Denise paused a moment before she answered. In the silence Evie tried to catch Daryl's eye, but he was firmly glaring at Denise, making her even more uncomfortable than she already was.

"None"

"Forget it." Daryl dismissed her instantly, his light flickering a little, his autumnal scent strengthening slightly. "Evie's in no state n ya don't know what ya doin'" he went back to wiping his hands on the grubby scrap of cloth he had been using before. Denise huffed.

"I can ID the meds we need, I've seen roamers up close, Rosita taught me how to use a machete" she looked behind her at Evie. "I'm ready. I'll go alone if I have to." Evie shook her head.

"You'll die alone."

"Ya knew 'bout this?" Daryl accused in Evie's direction. Evie shook her head at him.

"First I heard about it." He grunted, but didn't look up. He didn't favour her that courtesy. She rolled her eyes as Denise began to speak again.

"I won't die if we all go together." She all but begged. "Please?" Daryl stopped fiddling with his damned cloth and looked up at Evie, finally, but his eyes were not kind.

"Y'alright with this shit?" She wasn't sure if he meant going out again, or taking Denise on a death run. She shrugged her shoulders.

"Call it therapy. Me, my doctor and our Chaperone" she bit out at him, angry that he'd not even offered an explanation for any of this. He huffed and shot her a look,

"Ya don't think I got ya best int'rests in mind? Huh?" He went to say more but snapped his mouth closed instead. Evie narrowed her eyes at him.

"Are we doing this or what? Don't make me have to chase her out the gate" Evie said, pointing rudely in Denise's direction, exasperated but too worn out by Daryl to argue with him any more.

*****

They found themselves half hour or so later stuck in the road at a fallen tree, a walker trapped underneath it. It hissed and snarled at them, and Evie felt Denise stiffen beside her.

"I'll get it" she said, dodging the walkers reaching hands as she stabbed it in the head. It was wearing a backpack, full of alcohol.

"I'll take those." Daryl said, grabbing the backpack from Evie's hands before she could answer him. She huffed and wiped her bloodied knife on her pants leg.  
"Problem?" He asked her roughly, but she just shook her head. He grunted and threw the small rucksack in his pack.

"We don't need those, do we?" Denise asked him. He looked at her with a shrug.

"Cuts n scrapes" he said, but Denise shook her head.

"Ok, well, not in my infirmary." Daryl and Evie looked at her and she shrugged "drinking... my parents were drinkers... I don't do alcohol." Immediately Evie felt her hackles go up, as though it were a dig. Daryl seemed to feel it, and actually jumped to her defence.

"Spend more time out here n ya might change ya mind." He said quietly, not removing the small travel bottles from his pack, and instead slinging it over his shoulder. "Way's clear but the truck ain't gettin' through past that tree." He noted.

"On foot then." Evie added, starting to lead the way.

"Wait!" They both turned to Denise. "Looks like the tracks are a straighter way." Daryl shook his head

"Nah, we'll take the road." Evie rolled her eyes. Wasn't this one of those things they should discuss as a group? She understood, tracks had led them to nothing but crap, but she was feeling defiant and irritated, and she insisted.

"The road's twice as far." She narrowed her eyes, inviting him to argue, wanting him too. Anything was better than just moving around each other just out of the other's view. She thought they'd dealt with this, she thought they were ok. What had he said in the church?

"Ain't walkin' no damn tracks, n neither're you." He hissed in her direction. "Ya forget what happened to ya? How y'almost died?" Evie folded her arms under her chest and shrugged her shoulders, about to argue, but Denise spoke up.

"This sounds like a private conversation," she sped up a little.

"Denise get back here!" Evie called out to her. "You wanna talk about forgetting?" She shot at Daryl. "You promised me you weren't gonna leave me again, back in that church. But you aren't here."

"I'm here." Daryl scoffed, indicating at himself like that was what she meant, she knew he knew different. He was being facetious. Stupid redneck probably didn't know what that meant.

"You aren't here." She said sadly. "You're treating me to the cold shoulder again." She shrugged her shoulders "Why? You promised."

* * *

 

For a long moment Daryl couldn't answer her. The last thing they needed was to have this conversation in front of Denise, who was awkward enough as things were without getting involved in their domestic. He continued walking, head down, face pinched.

"I can't have ya in my head, right now." Were the words he settled for. "Stuff happened yesterday, ok? I'm still processin' that."

"You didn't come home." Evie answered him petulantly, and he rolled his shoulders.

"Was late." He said flatly. She shouldn't be out here, he thought to himself, her and Denise both.

All he knew was the world was a hell of a lot more dangerous than they first perceived, and he couldn't have Evie freaking out about it, not in her delicate state.  
Fury and hurt was rolling off her though, she stomped along beside him, Denise beside her, and she was a picture of anger. He didn't know how to talk to her anymore. Never had to before, she just knew what was in his head. Now they were fighting a block on each other's minds. Everything was a battle.

"Why're you so mad at me?" She asked, finally dropping her arms to her sides, her hurt washing over him suddenly, a tsunami of emotion set free by the unlocking of her arms. He stopped walking and turned to her.

"I ain't mad at ya, Evie" he managed softly, stunned that she thought so, knocked back by the onslaught of emotion, it wasn't what he meant by blocking her out. Certainly wasn't what he wanted. He didn't know why this was so hard, why it took every ounce of strength he had to keep her safe from what had happened. "Fightin' a losin' battle at every turn," he said, not sure if he meant her, or everything else.

"Well you're not supposed to be fighting me!" Evie's fists clenched at her sides as she harshly whispered at him. He sighed dejected. He wasn't, not intentionally.

"May I?" Denise said, now slightly behind them. They both turned to face her, Evie folding her arms defensively again. Daryl wanted this trip to be over already, this was all taking far too long, and was far too awkward. "Well, I think maybe, Evie feels shut out, and Evie, I think Daryl is trying to protect you." She shrugged. "We're fighting enough without fighting each other." Daryl frowned.

"Jus' said, I ain't fightin'." He turned to Evie. "But... I don't want ya to get scared n fall back into... wherever ya been the last few weeks. Ok? I gotta keep it from ya, n the way we work it means cuttin' y'off." Evie's face dropped, her frown faltered and her eyebrows raised up.

"That's not the best idea, actually." Denise piped up. "Blocking each other from the harsh reality is actual, uh, more harmful. You don't have to talk now, like, uhm, in front of me" she laughed nervously. "But you should talk. Later, tonight." She looked ahead and pointed. "Anyway I think we're here." Daryl looked over and sure enough they were at a strip mall, Edison's obvious in the middle.

"A'ight. Me n her're gonna do this, k?" He said to Denise who was suddenly worried and stiff. She nodded, standing with her back against the wall next to the door. Daryl looked at Evie as he knocked on the door, hoping they both had the sense enough to leave their personal shit where it belonged now that they were here. She nodded at him, and began using her knife to jimmy the door open.

When it swung open he poked his gun in and did a quick sweep, then nodded the girls in behind him.

The store was dark, dank and dusty, and reeked of the long dead. Denise walked in gagging, she hadn't spent much time around that smell, and he remembered how it could get stuck in your throat at first.

"We 'bout to see ya breakfast?" He asked as Denise leant forward trying to find clean air. She waved a hand at him.

"No, I'm good, it was oatmeal, just so you know." He turned away from her, not interested. There was a shutter down behind the counter at the back of the room, and he assumed that was where the drugs would be. He looked at Evie, she nodded and hopped up on the counter, checking the floor behind it before landing down there. She grabbed a shutter handle, and watched for his signal that he was ready.

This was what he liked, what he had wanted to get back to. Working together like clockwork, beautifully turned gears working together without the bitter scraping and clunking that seemed to now have become the norm. He wanted to be in sync with Evie, thought perhaps if he could stop worrying about her, for her, they could be.

She was frowning at him, and he gave her his imperceptible nod, so she threw the shutter up on a long sweep of her slender arm.  
There was nothing.

"Wow" Denise said. "You work together so well." Daryl smirked a little.

"Comes with doin' this over n over."

"If you put the meds on the table:-"

"No" Evie said "we'll just grab what we can." There was a thunk, a thud, from a closed door to their right, and Denise jumped visibly. The door seemed sturdy, and Evie shrugged.

"It's just one, it'll be fine" she said pointedly to the doctor, who was glaring wide eyed at the closed door. "Hey," Evie said, demanding Denise's attention "if it can't get out, it can't get you."

They left Denise at front of house while they rummaged through the shelves, shoving everything in their bags, not even checking labels. Daryl cast an eye over Evie as he blindly grabbed bottles from shelves. She had paused to take a long deep breath, her hands shaking slightly, her breath quivering with the beat of her heart, which he could hear.

"Evie?" He frowned, but she shook a hand at him, insinuating that she was ok. Even though she knew he would know the truth. He huffed and rolled his eyes, exasperated.

"Fine!" He grunted under his breath, he tried, goddammit, he couldn't do much else.

He threw another few bottles into his pack, hearing them clatter dully together and against the miniature alcohol bottles. He watched Evie, expecting her to turn at the noise, but she was still apparently struggling. He went to ask her if she was ok, when an almighty crash went off at the front of the store. As if by magic Evie was on full alert, darting back to the counter, hand gun held up,

"What's going on? What are you doing?" She yelled at Denise, who was pale and frightened.

"Nothing. I'm fine, sorry." Evie looked behind her at the now empty shelves and shrugged.

"Think we're done." Daryl nodded.

"Hey," he said to Denise "ya did good, findin' this place." They stepped outside, and Denise drew in big gasps of clean air before putting the back of her hand to her mouth.

"We told you, you aren't ready." Evie said gently, but the feeling from Denise was that she was glad she had done this, had gone outside the walls and experienced what everyone else had. It was admirable, of a little short sighted.

* * *

 

Evie faltered when Daryl stepped up onto the railroad tracks. He turned back to her with a shrug.

"'S'quicker, right?" She didn't care anymore, she just wanted to get back. After having a mini panic attack in the chemist's, the spell only broken by Denise making all that noise, all she wanted was the walls of Alexandria. She sighed and followed as he led, ensuring Denise was paying attention and following too.

She tried to work out what had triggered it. The dark? Like the toilet Daryl had left her in to draw away a herd, when she was convinced he was gone forever. The dust? Everywhere they went was covered in a layer of grey. The smell? But that smell was just part of life now, a mix of dust and death and staleness. It could have just been being outside the walls with Daryl's eyes boring into her, trying to read her mind, her emotions.

She still wasn't convinced they were ok, that he'd been truthful when he said he was trying to protect her. Something had been wrong for a long while, his unearthly glow had been clinging to him ever tighter since the day he lost his 'bow and bike. She just couldn't fathom why he'd keep something that was clearly so important from her.

"There's a cooler in that car." Denise said as they passed by an old beat up wreck. Walkers were trapped inside, "they could have something we need." Evie shook her head.

"We got what we came for." She called out as Denise looked the car over.

"Nah, ain't worth it, Denise, c'mon." Daryl confirmed, as a walker. Priced Denise and started pounding on the glass. As she watched, glued to the spot there on the tracks Denise reached for the door, leaning awkwardly and her feet unsteady. She opened it, she opened the damn door, and the walker was grabbing at her, when Daryl darted forward with his gun raised Denise yelled at him.

"Don't!" And killed the walker herself with her machete, then bending at the waist and wrenching, strings of saliva hitting the floor.

"What the hell!" Evie found her feet again and ran forward. "What the fuck Denise? You could have died! For a couple of sodas?!"

"threw up on my glasses" Denise said numbly, a nervous laugh staccatoing from her. "No" she looked up at Evie with a smile "just this one" she held up a drinks can, still grinning, looking unbelievably proud of herself. She caught her breath and walked back up to the tracks.

"Did ya hear her? Ya could'a died right then!" Daryl yelled, catching up with the two women as they as they stood, squared against each other on the railroad.

"Who gives a shit?" Denise said far too jovially, and Evie suddenly felt a wave of rage from Daryl. She shot her eyes over him quickly, ensuring he wasn't about to do anything stupid. "You could've died killing those saviours!" Denise said to Daryl, "but you didn't." She shrugged "you want to live, you take chances, that's how it works now." She looked at the two of them in front of her. "You have no idea what that meant to me, do you? Not coming out here and facing my shit is what's stupid. I had to do this, and I wanted you here" she turned to Daryl, "because you're strong and you make me feel safe and you" she turned to Evie, "because you're scared and alone and you need this, you can do this! Even when others think you can't, and that makes me feel like I can do things I didn't think I could. Like this" she held up the soda can, Evie looked at Daryl, who was looking less angry and more hurt now. "I wanted you both here because you're brave and you're strong"

Denise was still talking passionately, but Evie noticed a sudden change in Daryl, he stood up straighter, minutely but noticeably, and his ears seemed to prick. He went to speak, and Evie turned back to Denise just as a bolt appeared through her eye.

Everything went slow, painfully so. Denise was still talking, and falling, and Evie grabbed her to stop it but she was already gone, then she was standing, turning, perhaps even yelling, arming herself, her heart beating, pounding, in her throat, as through the trees a group of men and women armed to the teeth came.


	57. Chapter 57

The man in the middle, Evie noticed as things came to full speed again, was scarred awfully down one side of his face. Like he'd caught on fire and his skin had melted.

"You drop 'em now." He yelled, sounding panicked, and Evie faltered a split second before she did. Denise was lying dead behind them and now she realised these people had Eugene, and it was becoming too much. Her heart beat seemingly in her head, and her breath came in short sharp rasps.

"Nah, you don't talk much." The blond was saying, and Evie felt Daryl growl beside her, or inside her, an anger emanated from his pores.

"I should'a done it." He bit out between his clenched teeth, and suddenly Evie realised that this was D. That the crossbow was Daryl's, and this son of a bitch had just shot their doctor with it. Their companion, their friend.

"What's that?" The blond chuckled "seriously I didn't catch what ya said." Evie thought Daryl wouldn't honour this prick with repeating himself, but he did,

"I should'a killed ya." He said louder, and Evie's heart sank. The people behind this D were laughing. Yet she knew that Daryl could take them all on and win, and wondered why he didn't. Was he really so worried about people seeing who he really was, now, amongst this mess?

And still Denise lay behind them, slowly cooling, no longer breathing.

Evie wanted to throw up, and she raised her weapon again as D, or Dwight as he introduced himself, asked her name.

"Evie. What do you want?" She managed in reply, swallowing back thick bile which threatened, burning her throat.

"Well, Evie," the way he said her name made her cringe, it felt dirty and wrong from his mouth. She wanted to look at Daryl, get some reassurance, but she couldn't drag her eyes away as Dwight spoke, and instead she trained them on Eugene, on his knees, looking like his whole world had ended, face screwed up in fear and wet with tears.

She was at risk of blacking out if she didn't control her breathing, but the more she tried the harder and faster it got.

"...or we blow Eugene's brains out, then yours, then his" Dwight trained the crossbow on her and Daryl in turn, and she wondered again why Daryl didn't do something. Anything. Just grab them all with his ridiculous strength and amazing speed and just whisk them out of there.  
But no. He had a personal vendetta and this Dwight was going to pay, at the detriment of anyone who got in the way.

Including her.

The thought hurt, and she hoped it wasn't true, but it felt it right then, and her breathing became wheezy and noisy. After the way he'd been treating her, Evie couldn't help but think that Daryl would put her in harm's way to get his own back on these people. She could see Denise's foot from the corner of her eye and a sob bubbled in her chest. She pushed it down, as hard as it was, she suppressed it. Showing her weaknesses now would be the death of her.

She clenched her teeth as Eugene began to speak about someone by the oil barrels. Evie hadn't even noticed those, big rusty metal canisters which could hide a person, or was Eugene stalling? She had no way of knowing, and she tore her eyes away to look at Daryl, while the others were occupied. He appeared relaxed, and she frowned, confused as to how he could be so calm.

It was then all Hell seemed to break loose, and the spell was broken.

* * *

 

In truth Daryl was making fast calculations in his head, a hundred scenarios and consequences flashing in his mind at speed, none particularly logical, but all possibilities, none the less.  
Even with the presence of that pull, that god damned unknowable force in his head every time he came across these assholes, he made his plans, biding his time as Dwight spat out Evie's name like a curse. He could kill him just for that alone.

It was just before Eugene mentioned Abraham that Daryl caught his scent on the breeze, and then saw the copper top of his head for a split second appear behind the barrels. No one else would have noticed, and he had to fight to suppress the smile that threatened to spread on his lips. The same way he suppressed the need to comfort and calm Evie, who was panting so hard she was at risk of suffocating. Fear and confusion rolled off her like waves on a lazy sea, but he embraced her scent as a reason to find a way out of this, and the fuckers in front of him were about to die for what they did.

Shots were fired from the trees, and Daryl didn't wait to see who had been got, he swung his rifle up to his eye, and began shooting at will. He didn't want Dwight dead, he wanted him alive so he could take his time, make him suffer. Even though he should have killed him, now was no time for mercy, with Denise dead on the floor behind him.

That would prove to be his failing, though.

He double checked behind him and Saw that Evie was kneeling behind a car, protecting herself, giving covering fire. He faced front and Eugene's face was buried in Dwight's groin, Dwight screaming in agony. That was good enough for now, shooting Dwight could cause accidental damage to Eugene.

As Walkers began to descend on the noise, Daryl concentrated on taking them out instead.

The air was soon ripe with the smell of gunfire, spent bullet casings littering the floor as Dwight yelled for his people to fall back. He'd somehow got Eugene off him, and Daryl saw his chance as the saviours retreated.

"Daryl!" He ran forward, down a slope towards the greenery and open fields beyond. In such open space he could destroy every last one of them. "Daryl don't!" The sound of Evie's voice stopped him. He turned back, finding her glaring at him, a fire in her eyes he wasn't expecting. "Don't you leave me now, like this, don't you dare!" She bit the words out through gritted teeth but he caught them perfectly. She was standing with her hands firmly on her hips, a sneer on her mouth. Her eyes were dry, angry, and intense. The emotion he felt from her, though, was muted, as was her fragrance. She was on the edge of falling into a very dangerous state of mind.

Eugene was injured, and though Abraham was safe and well, he couldn't move Denise and Eugene on his own.

Daryl crossed back to them, slowly taking the slope back up to the tracks. He tried not to look at Denise, at his bolt quivering still, half buried in her skull. The idea that his weapon did that made him feel physically sick, and he was pretty sure he couldn't throw up even if he wanted to.

"I ain't goin' no where, I'm here, Evie, I'm here."

"She shouldn't have been out here." Evie spat fiercely, looking at Daryl as though this was all his fault, at least, that was how it felt to him. This was all his fault, he should have killed that son of a bitch while he had had the chance.

"Gotta truck" Daryl addressed Abraham, "mile or so aways, think ya c'n manage Eugene?" Abraham nodded, herself he worked best with a job to do.

"Yes sir, that I can." He looked around him, grabbed a tarpaulin, then eyed Evie carefully before turning back to Daryl. "She gonna be ok?" Daryl nodded, wondering how he could move Denise without arousing too much suspicion.

"Evie" He said, and she looked at him again. Abraham was heaving Eugene over, rolling him into the tarpaulin, and then began dragging him away. Evie nodded, threw her weapon over her shoulder and headed directly for Denise. She grabbed her feet, and nodded at Daryl.

"Be gentle." she said as he took Denise under the arms.

* * *

 

Breathing underwater.

It wasn't the first time she'd thought life felt that way. Hadn't Daryl made her feel like she was drowning when they were still avoiding their feelings for each other?

It was different this time. Now the sea wasn't Daryl, it was her. The rolling, crashing, waves dragging her down into herself and forcing her to hold her breath. As Daryl ran down to follow the retreating saviours who had started this mess, she almost sank to her knees, winded, struggling to breathe. Her mind desperately trying to find something to cling to to keep it present.

Denise was dead. What would they tell Rick, whose son's life she had saved, what would they tell Tara, who had been promised an I love you on her return.

More broken promises, and all because of people. She never realised how much of a problem people would be at the end of the world.

She couldn't spiral into that dark place, though, she clenched her fists and stood tall. She was angry, enraged, those bastards had done this and she damn well wasn't going to be left to cope with the aftermath alone.

So she called Daryl, yelled, and he turned instantly, looking at her curiously. He had imagined she would turn the other way, let the sea of turmoil drag her under, but no. She was defiantly swimming, and he had the gall to be surprised by that.

She hefted up Denise's feet and as Daryl grabbed her arms Evie noticed he avoided looking at Denise. Guilt was written all over his face, his scent and feelings somewhat muted. She worried he might move the doctor without the due care that she was entitled to. She told him to be gentle. As she did so he looked at her, walking backwards far too easily without misplacing a single step.

His eyes glowered, as if he disapproved of her caution.

"Le's jus' get 'er moved" he grumbled, and anger washed over Evie, emanating from deep inside Daryl. It was worse than she thought. Angry, guilty, Daryl was bound to make a stupid move. He could be a loose cannon, a volatile mess, when he got like that. She was sure being a vampire didn't help. All emotions seemed to be tenfold, from what she had experienced.

So far.

As things got more messy, as the saviours proved over and over again that they would not back down, she didn't know how much more they would experience together. That afternoon had been pretty hairy, and more than one bullet had whooshed far too close passed her ear.

But she wouldn't dwell on that. Yes, she could have died, but she hadn't. Denise had, and they needed to make that right, before they worried about themselves.  
She had to hold on to the fact that she was alive. She didn't want to have one of her damned blackouts, worrying everyone senseless when there was more going on than her and her own issues.

Damn she could be so selfish.

Daryl shrugged his shoulders, rearranging Denise in his arms, and the bottles in his pack clinked together noisily. Evie wasn't the only one who noticed, and Daryl's navy blue eyes met hers, and he snorted without humour.

Evie clenched her teeth together behind her closed lips. There was no need for that. She wasn't the one who had upset him this time. She thought about holding her tongue, really she did, but as they walked stoically onward, Denise getting heavier in her hands, she had to speak before her mind exploded.

"You got something you wanna say to me?" She muttered, knowing Daryl would hear though Abraham would not. Daryl graced her with a dark scowl, but didn't answer. It just made her more angry, exasperated. They were supposed to be over whatever hump their relationship had hit, working together now in the face of the saviours.

"Spit it out, redneck, what's the problem?" Daryl stopped walking and Evie crashed into Denise's feet, winding herself.

"Ain't no need to be racist." He said quietly, and Evie felt heat rise in her face, Thinking maybe she had been out of order, but still. She was pretty sure after all this time she deserved more than withering, meaningful looks and sarcastic puffs of air.

"Got more on my mind 'n you, right now, or hadn't ya noticed?" Daryl gestured with Denise in his arms and Evie sighed

"Yeah, I noticed" she said sullenly, hating the sound of her own voice. She wondered why she couldn't keep her damned mouth shut, now Daryl thought she was being selfish. Maybe she was. She thought that was all she had been for days now. It was like a disease. "I didn't mean," she paused, not sure how to continue. "Can we just go? She's getting heavy." Daryl looked at her carefully before nodding and beginning to walk backwards in that oddly elegant way he had. Like the ground beneath his feet wasn't covered in uneven stones and metalwork. Evie bumbled along in front of him, trying hard not to drop Denise as the dead woman's weight slowly gave in to gravity.

What had he seen, or sensed, when he looked at her that way? He seemed satisfied enough to keep going. Not for the first time, Evie wished she could read him as well as he read her, but it seemed she could only read herself through his eyes when they were having sex.

She had an idea that wouldn't be happening again for a while.

* * *

 

Daryl looked at her, really looked at her in, inside her head and inside her heart. He began walking without another word.

What he wanted to say, what he meant, was that 50 or more people in Alexandria were going to be looking to him for information on what happened out there. Rick would want to know, a debrief of sorts, and he'd have to relive it all, step for Step and word for word. He wasn't looking forward to that.

On top of all of those things that Dwight bastard was still Out there, with his life intact.

This had been a shitty idea from the start, and he was fucked if he knew where to even begin telling Alexandria they had no damn doctor because he was an incompetent prick. Now Evie felt bad, and that wasn't his intention. She could ask all the questions she wanted, and he'd give her the answers, but she asked at the most inopportune times. This whole thing was fucked up from the start, and more than anything he just wanted to go back to how they were on the road, before Alexandria and before the damned saviours.

Even having Merle a constant narrator of his life was better than this. He'd never questioned where the voices had gone. Maybe he should have.

Back when he felt useful and wasn't getting people killed every step of the way, when he didn't have to fight to keep his fangs retracted because every damn thing and every damn one pissed him off.

Before that ever nagging feeling in his head which now felt under so much pressure it might explode. A force pulling him in the opposite direction he wanted to turn.

That was what was making him so angry, that insatiable force which he couldn't seem to lose.


	58. Chapter 58

Evie and Daryl buried Denise in the ever growing graveyard at Alexandria. Through a veil of tears Evie could see that Daryl's light was gone, no longer dim and clinging closely, just gone entirely. Silently they dug, positioned Denise carefully, and covered her in. Carol stopped by, some others, too. No words were spoken, hands were laid gently on shoulders, meant to give comfort, but Evie felt the fingers against her skin like blocks of ice, the touches making her stiffen and break out in gooseflesh.

Daryl was faring no better, grimacing and growling whenever anyone got close. He kept casting his eyes across to the gate, bristling so hard Evie could feel it, like electricity in the air. At one point, he looked at the gate, eyes ablaze, and his fangs descended as he sneered aggressively.

"Hey" she croaked at him, her throat dry from the dust flung all around them. He turned to her sharply, flicking his canines back into place. "Don't do this to yourself." She said, her voice sounding flat. "It's not on you." He shrugged and looked at the fresh grave in front of them, a little pile of leftover earth between them. Evie leaned on her shovel to fight the sudden urge to turn and hold him in her arms. It would definitely not be what he wanted, she didn't need to feel his deepest emotions to know that, and the last thing she needed was to seek solace and comfort only to be shoved away. She sighed audibly.

"I did that" Daryl said firmly "I caused this. I gotta make it right." Evie straightened and turned to face him.

"No"

"If I hadn't taken us on the tracks, if I'd'a refused to go..." he broke off, paused, before starting again. "I din't even feel 'em, I was so intent on listenin' to the things she had to say... I din't even know they were there." Evie shook her head and gave in to the need to touch him, at least, placing her hand gently on his forearm.

"She wanted to be out there. She made her choice, whether we went with her not."

"I could'a stopped all'a this before it started" Daryl spat, and just as she'd feared, he shrugged her off. He turned where he stood and faced the gate, seeming to contemplate it. Evie watched him chewing on his lip for a long moment, he was making plans, she could almost hear the cogs turning in his head, but he wasn't in his right mind, and moments before he began to move she felt that he'd made his decision to do so.

"Daryl?" She called as he stomped away, his shovel hitting the ground with a clatter. He didn't turn, just marched towards the gate. "Hey!" She ran to catch up to him. "What are you going to do? Chase them down? Alone?" Daryl stopped and turned to her.

"I gotta fix this."

"It's not broken, Daryl, it's dead. You can't fix it."

"Then I'm gonna stop it gettin' any worse." Evie shook her head, her eyes narrowed up at him.

"You're crazy." He shrugged and nodded at the same time

"Maybe, maybe I ain't. I gotta try" he looked at the floor "could'a been you. Maybe next time it would be. I can't let it be, Evie." He turned back to the gate, called for it to be opened, and strode out like it was the most regular thing in the world.

Evie stood and stared as the gate rolled loudly closed once more, Glenn dashing up behind her.

"What was that?" He asked as Michonne also joined them.

"Where is he going? He needs to be here." She looked at Evie as if she might know what was going on. Evie shook her head.

"He's angry, feeling guilty." She looked at them both in turn "come on, we'll go get him back. If I can't talk him down maybe one of you can." Glenn laughed softly without humour.

"If you can't, nobody can. Come on. Molly!" He said, and the Alexandrian nodded, opening up again.

*****

He must have gone at break neck speed, Evie thought to herself as they followed his small amount of tracks, no doubt left in his sheer determination to get away as quickly as possible.

"How the hell did he get so far so fast?" Glenn wondered aloud, and Evie had to bite her tongue, so desperate to just say hey, you know what, dude's a fucking vampire and he could be back in Georgia by now. She was pleased when Michonne answered  
"He knows the woods better than anyone, let's just go steady."

*****

Evie stood on the long abandoned train tracks and stared at the spot where Denise fell. There was no evidence, no splat of blood or viscera was visible, and for some reason that made her so sad, like Denise had never existed.

"This where it happened?" Glenn sounded far away to her, and she couldn't focus. Those ever present waves threatened to envelope her again, and she needed to pull herself together. "Evie?!" Glenn said sharply, and she looked up slowly "this where it happened?" He asked again, and she heard him perfectly this time.

"We should let him go." She answered gently, suddenly furious that there was no evidence on the track that Denise had died there. "We should let him do this." She spat, staring at the ground where Denise had lay, bolt sticking up out of her eye. What had she been saying? Her last words were kind but also brutal. A fitting tribute, but Evie couldn't remember what they were. That made her even angrier, and she got to thinking about Daryl and how he must be feeling, guilty, broken, sad.

Maybe he'd go feral again like he had back in that car park a million moons ago.

"Good" she whispered to herself, and Michonne and Glenn shared a look before questioning her with matching faces. "Nothing" Evie sighed. "He needs to do this"

"He shouldn't do this" Michonne warned "he's as vulnerable as anyone else. He is not in his right mind." Evie scoffed.

"Are any of us? The most sane thing to me right now seems to be to hunt these assholes down and destroy them. He's doing the right thing!"

"He doesn't know _what_ he's doing." Glenn argued. "None of us do." Evie clenched her jaw and looked back at the ground. "Maybe him going makes you feel better about this." Glenn shrugged his shoulders "maybe they keep knowing more about us than we do about them. But maybe Daryl is going to get himself killed." Evie tried not to scoff at that, Glenn narrowed his eyes at her. "Don't you care?" She finally looked up, her face surprised and hurt.

"Of course I care! You think I don't know him? He can do this. He could take out every last one of these fuckers but-"

"Which way did Dwight and his men run?" Glenn cut her off, and it made her angrier. The waves were gone for now, a raging fire in their place.

Drowning or burning.

It seemed they were the only things she was capable of any more.

"Evie!" She looked at Glenn and relented. What was she going to say? 'Daryl's also one of the living dead and he can save the world'? No. They'd just think she'd gone mad anyway. Hell half of them already did. She nodded the way they had run, and the three of them began to follow Daryl's track.

* * *

 

Daryl was tracing the steps Dwight, specifically, had taken through the trees and out into the overgrown field beyond. He waded carefully through the long grasses, keen eyes picking up every blade bent out of place, nostrils flaring to catch the scent of the assholes he was following.

He tried to block out all thoughts of home, thoughts of Evie, and how the hell Alexandria would fare with new enemies and no doctor. He grimaced, and shook his head to clear the thoughts away. The whole thing was a mess and it was his doing, he wasn't about to let it be his undoing, or anyone else's, now.

Dwight had been limping. Daryl remembered Eugene's face buried in Dwight's crotch, and a smile toyed with the corner of his mouth. The humour didn't last, though, as his guilt ripped through him again, reminding him exactly why he was out here.

_"Because you're strong and you make me feel safe"_

He grimaced. The last voice wanted to hear was Denise's. They were her last words to him.  
What a crock of shit they turned out to be.

A rustle from the trees caught his ears and he sprang back to full attention. He raised his crossbow and readied himself to fire. But it wasn't what he thought, what he hoped. In frustration he shot a bolt into the tree as Evie stepped out from behind it.

"Nice to see you too!" She spat, not perturbed by his shooting, of course knowing he would only miss on purpose. He gritted his teeth. He didn't know it was her until the last minute, he wondered where the hell his mind was. Being so angry and single minded was truly going to be his downfall. He raised the bow so it pointed straight up.

"Ya shouldnt'a come!" He yelled at her, teeth still clenched together.

"You shouldn't have left." Michonne and Glenn appeared and Daryl rolled his eyes. What was this? A damn family outing?  
He began to walk away, not at all surprised that they were following, but pissed with them for it all the same. They didn't get it, they didn't understand why it was so important he did this alone. Because he could do it alone. They'd get themselves killed.

"When I split off from Sasha and Abraham," he yelled turning back, "he was out there, in the woods. Put a gun to my head." He shook his head and chewed his lip turning away, if only to try and block them out again. Evie's desperate feelings of wanting to help, but also wanting him home. Glenn's anger, for different reasons than his.  "Man, I even tried to help him." He felt Evie's need to empathise, and it made him so mad. He fisted his free hand, and clenched it tight until his knuckles whitened.

"So, you think this your fault?" Glenn asked him, trying to be the mediator amongst all the shit. Daryl turned sharply again.

"Yeah, I know it is." He replied, voice sounding gravelly as he sat just the right side of frustrated tears. He swallowed them down, back where they belonged. "I'm gonna do what I should'a done before." Glenn scoffed and called after him.

"What, for her? She's gone, man. You're doing this for you. You're being selfish." Daryl shrugged. He wasn't. He wasn't doing it for himself, far from it. But how could he explain?

"Man, I don't give a shit." He answered, which was far from the truth. He could see in Evie's eyes that she knew it, but neither of them said so. She just stood there, arms folded across her chest, eyes on fire, but emotions running high and betraying the look on her eyes. He chewed his lip contemplatively.

"We need to get back and figure this out from home. Our home." Glenn's words ripped to his core. He heard Denise again.

_"You make me feel safe."_

And he almost gave in, almost.  
But he couldn't. Too much had been going on for too long.  
On top of that need, was that pull, the tug in his head getting stronger and leading him almost as much as his rage. He was desperate to find the source, find out what the hell to meant, almost as much as he was desperate to make the whole debacle right.

"Man, I can't" he whispered, almost to himself.

"Daryl" Glenn begged, a whine to his vice of desperation.

"I said I can't!" Daryl shouted, and Evie, who had been silent until now, suddenly agreed with him.

"I can't either." She said quietly,and Daryl stomped off again, Evie trailing behind him.

* * *

 

They walked in silence. Daryl bristling and breathing hard as they did. Evie struggled to keep up, Daryl's mind going a thousand miles an hour making her dizzy.

"Ya shouldn't be here." He said to her eventually. She rolled her eyes but didn't answer. In his right mind he would know how she felt about that. She didn't need to speak to him, and she was too out of breath to speak anyway.

She had thought she was the one losing her mind, but listening to Daryl's emotions was a rollercoaster that kept going up. She even worried he'd never come down again, and she wondered if she could love someone so tightly wound and volatile.

But that didn't matter, she reminded herself. This wasn't about her and Daryl anymore. Life was not that simple.

When Daryl stopped walking and turned 180 degrees she very nearly crashed into him.

"What?" She asked, steadying herself against him. To her surprise he grabbed her arms, his hands warm, fingers almost burning into her skin, he gripped her tightly, frightening her. "What?" She asked again, desperately searching his eyes, his mind, for an answer. His eyes met hers, dark blue and for the first time in a long time, he seemed to really see her. She wanted to relish it, wanted to get lost in them, but there was no time. The urgency was clear in the way he gripped her.

"Ya don't hear it?" He asked, eyes narrowing, and she shook her head. She heard nothing but his damn mind.

"What is it?" She asked in return as he tore his eyes from hers at length.

"Whistlin'. Shit. C'mon" he let her go, leaving her cold, and began to run the way they had come. She turned and watched him a moment before following, trying desperately to keep up with him. Still his mind ran too fast for her to follow, worrying her and instilling in her that same desperation she had seen in his eyes.

He stopped suddenly again, allowing her to catch up, though impatiently, and grabbed her cool hand in his warmer one. He began to run again, dragging her along so fast that her feet barely touched the ground.

Then she heard it, the whistling. Daryl slowed and began to creep, Evie's hand still in his. She peered around her self, peeking through the trees they'd again found themselves amongst, and spied Michonne and Glenn, who had left them just after the tracks, gagged and bound.

Glenn saw them and became frantic as Daryl stiffened and Evie knew they were caught, as certain as she was of her own name as she felt the hairs on the back of her neck raise, as she felt Daryl realise that Dwight was behind them. She raised her hands as Daryl turned to face the man who had caused all of this. She tried to steady her breathing as Dwight said Daryl's name, which sounded dirty and putrid from his mouth.

It wasn't over, it couldn't be over. They could finish it, right there.  
But when the shot went off, ringing in her ear from such close range she felt all hope drain away. She wanted to yell, run, fight, but couldn't. Suddenly her mind was free as she lost Daryl's thoughts and feelings, as his mind went to nothing but white. He was shot, her mind caught up with what was happening and she realised he was shot.

Was he dead? Could he die? She couldn't remember, he had told her but she couldn't remember what he said as her ears rang with piercing tinnitus.

"You'll be alright" she heard from far away, and then hands were on her, big rough hands grabbed at her shoulders and took her weapons. She moved when they pushed her, unable to turn her head and see Daryl, though she was sure he was right beside her.  
She fell over her own feet as she was shoved, and was picked up to her feet again roughly.

"Just move" a bitter voice spat, and she did.

They were thrown into a truck, all four of them, as the doors were slammed shut, and they were plunged into darkness, Evie finally finally found her voice.

"Daryl?" She fell to her knees beside him on the floor, her hands on his shoulders, searching for the wound that asshole Dwight had inflicted. Glenn had found a rough hessian type blanket and handed it to her, she took it gratefully and tried to portray her apologies and thankfulness with her eyes.

"'M'okay." Daryl said, sounding pained, as Evie draped the blanket over him.

"The bullet?" She asked him, and he nodded gently. It was still in his shoulder.

"They came out of nowhere." Glenn said quietly, barely above a whisper.

"They were followin' us." Daryl answered him, sounding pinched and breathless. Evie shushed him.

"Don't waste your energy talking."  
She said, running a hand over his head and down his paling face.

"'M fine" he said again, without conviction and not sounding fine at all. Evie kissed his temple lightly and placed her forehead where her lips had touched.

"I know." She whispered. "I'm sorry, about everything."

"Me too" he whispered back, leaning against her head slightly.

"Where do you think they're taking us?" Michonne asked. Evie sighed

"To their home? An outpost?" She wondered. Daryl was shaking his head.

"Nah. They got somethin' else in mind."

* * *

 

The feeling like his head might explode was lessening. He finally felt he could breathe, despite the slight pain in his shoulder. He was made of strong stuff, his shoulder barely felt warm, but he wasn't completely out of the woods. Infection could set in, and though it wouldn't kill him, couldn't kill him, it could leave him weaker than usual.

He didn't know where they were going, but he knew it wasn't back to the saviours home. One of the assholes who chucked them on the truck had mentioned Negan and a meeting place.

And the pull had relaxed. Just like that he didn't feel he was being lead by a rope he struggled against. A similar but different feeling to the one he got when Evie was in need. This pull had never been as desperate, but had been insistent.

Now it was becoming more gentle, and he had the feeling he was about to find out exactly what it had been about. 


	59. Chapter 59

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My introduction of Negan.  
> We do follow the original story here, but I'm not going to go in depth with the deaths that happened.

They made no plans, they knew there was nothing they could possibly do. With their strongest wounded, and weaponless, they were useless against whatever may meet them when they finally arrived to wherever they were headed. Silence rang out through the back of the truck. Only the sound of their breathing, driving Evie mad.

The truck had been moving for some time when it finally stopped, juddered to a halt with a squeal of brakes. Evie was still on the floor with Daryl and he collapsed into her a little with the momentum. She still couldn't read him, and was worried by the disappearance of the light that had always seemed to emanate from deep within him. He righted himself, but said nothing. There was a lot of loud talking outside, and Evie readied herself to just rush whoever opened those doors.

But they didn't open for a very long time.

*****

It was hours later that Daryl perked up a little, sitting straighter, head tilting. She reached out to touch his arm.

"'S them." He said simply, and Evie, Michonne and Glenn all strained to hear. Them who? Negan?

No.

"Son," Rick?

"What?" And Carl. Evie felt her face frown as she tried to work out how, why, Rick and carl would be there, but the the whistling they had heard in the woods started again, and her heart sank. Rick and Carl were now also caught. A new voice spoke, softly, and she looked at Daryl for some insight, but he just knelt on the floor of the truck, eyes narrow, mouth a thin straight line. He was listening intently. That whistling, she thought, there had to be a hundred voices.

Light flooded into the truck through a slight gap in the doors, and Evie darted forward to try and see something but Daryl yanked her back. The voices were muffled, she couldn't make much out, but there was a feeling in the air, a fear like she'd never felt before.

"This is it" Daryl said, "they're all here." Michonne leaned forward

"All of them?" She asked, as if she knew what was happening. Daryl sniffed as inconspicuously as he could, but Evie noticed, and he nodded.

"All of 'em." He agreed solemnly.

"Maggie?" Glenn asked, and suddenly the doors flew outward,

"C'mon" Evie squinted in the light as Dwight's face appeared in front of them "ya got some people to meet" Glenn stumbled out behind her, after Daryl had been dragged to the floor.

"Maggie!?"

"On your knees" Dwight said roughly. Evie looked around her, Rosita on one side, Daryl on the other. All around them her family knelt, sobbing, scared. That feeling of fear strong in the air. They were surrounded by saviours, and no one had any weapons.  
She looked to Daryl, but he gave her a gentle shake of his head.

She wished she knew what that meant.

*****

The way they spoke about him, Evie fully expected a fanfare and an ethereal halo of light when the door to the RV in front of her and her family flew open. Fully and completely expected it.  
So she was more than surprised by her reaction when the door swung out and light shone through, her eyes squinted against the new brightness, and her breath caught in her throat. She looked sidelong at her nearest companions, they were not squinting, they couldn't seem to see the light.

Negan, still impossible to see in the brightness, stepped heavily down the small Metal steps and onto the ground, the light encompassed him to nothing but a warm white glow until Evie's eyes adjusted. She looked at Daryl, his face a fit of shock and amazement. In that moment Evie knew, she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt.

Negan was a vampire.

* * *

 

Daryl stared at the elder before him, wide eyed and stunned. This guy was an old vampire. Ancient. His light, which didn't effect Daryl the way it had Evie, who squinted beside him like she was looking at the sun, shone a thousand times brighter than anything he had ever seen.

"Are we pissing our pants yet?" Negan asked with a wry smile, still standing in the open doorway of the RV, and Daryl thought Hell yes, I fucking am.

He had thought he was alone, that he and Merle were all that was left and then Merle died. Now, everything came crashing into place. That tug, the ever present pull in his head once they'd come so far north, made perfect sense. His elder had been local, his elder had called out for him. Had known he was around, wanted him, and had called him. As far as Daryl was aware he didn't have to answer, Merle had been lackadaisical in his teachings, and then some, but he was Daryl's maker, and as a foundling Daryl understood he need only answer to Merle's call.

And he did, finding him too late, and turned into one of the walkers.

The memory, as real as if it were happening over again, had him looking at the floor instead of at this new, older, Vampire.

If Negan was a vampire, this was worse than any of them interpreted. If Negan was as old he seemed, they were all in grave danger. It made sense now that he had so many followers, so many men and women hanging on his every word. He was powerful, and his presence demanded attention and compliance. Daryl looked up again as the elder approached Maggie.

"Je-sus! You look shitty!" Negan wasn't paying him any special attention. That was a good sign. Maybe he was wrong, maybe he was suffering some kind of delirium from the wound in his shoulder. He glanced in Evie's direction, who had been desperately trying to get his attention somehow, and as she mouthed at him he realised it was wishful thinking, she knew.

"Vampire?" Her mouth formed the word slowly, silently, but he heard it as though she'd spoken it directly into his brain. He looked away from her.

He didn't know what to do.

* * *

 

Evie bit back her gasp a little too late. The noise escaped as though she was desperate for air whilst under water, liquid and bubbling. She tried not to look as Daryl was dragged back into place after punching Negan in the face. His nails peeling noisily from his fingers as he struggled against the saviours, desperate to stop this insanity, but not wanting to come off as the creature he really was. He could finish this, Evie knew he could, but he didn't.

He didn't.

She gasped for air again as the realisation hit her that maybe he couldn't. Negan was, after all, a vampire. Maybe they were evenly matched. What if Negan were stronger?

Negan was incensed. Screaming out a howled

"No! No! That, is a no no" she listened to the weeping around her, the crickets and cicada's clicking noisily, but Negan's voice drew her attention the most. It demanded your ears and like it or not, you listened. Daryl was grunting, growling, as Negan stopped Dwight from killing him with his own weapon, and Evie's heart was breaking. She wanted to do something, anything, but she was firmly glued to the asphalt under her knees.

"I need you to know me" Negan was saying, ignoring the mess and the noise all around him. "So," he said, as if the interruption was nothing but a mild inconvenience. He looked at his red and bloodied bat, swinging it up in the air to strike again. "Back to it"  
Evie's eyes widened, she felt them grow huge in her head, as the bat came down on Glenn, and Maggie started to groan.

She wanted to be sick, to vomit right there down herself. Glenn, in pain, in shock, was trying to talk, and Negan teased him. Teased him! Evie wanted to yell, put him out of his damn misery! But her mouth was as glued as her knees. No noise escaped her. She was numb.

*****

It was some time later when she came back to the here and now again. It was light, and Rick had Carl on the floor. She was confused, and Rick was a wreck. Negan had a smile on his face and she felt bitter rage bubble in her belly.

"Dwight, load him up." Negan looked around at the group, vaguely gesturing at Daryl, and locked eyes with Evie. "This one" he pointed the bloody and steaming baseball bat at her, a bright and mocking smile on his lips "stick her in the truck with me." He looked around as Evie was grabbed by her shoulders and dragged to her feet. She tried to resist, pushing her feet into the ground and yelling, but it was no use. More hands were on her, more people pulling and lifting and shoving. She managed to look behind her and caught Daryl's eye before the truck doors were slammed on him. He didn't register that he'd even seen her, and she pleaded with her eyes for her family to get up and do something, but they'd given up, broken and exhausted, they'd given in.

She yelled again, and it cost her her senses as she was pistol whipped in the temple, and everything went suddenly black.

*****

She woke up to the sound of a metal door being slammed and a bolt being pulled across. Wherever she was, it was pitch, and she knew she was alone. It was freezing cold and the ground beneath her felt wet. It stank of urine and vomit and something else she couldn't place, not that she wanted to. Far away she could hear music, though she couldn't make out what it was.

* * *

 

"Where is she?" Daryl couldn't feel Evie, not so much as a whisper of emotion from her. He knew she was alive, and he'd die trying to find her. He had been taken straight to Negan's quarters. They were plush, and women milled around in makeup and skirts, pantyhose and high heels. He'd have found it funny if the circumstances were any different.

"She's fine, don't worry. What do you think of this, though?" Negan spread his arms out wide to take in the gaggle of girls "Got my own little harem going here." Negan bobbed and bounced on his haunches, making Daryl dizzy. "Ladies, would you mind?" Negan asked politely, and the girls headed out of the door. One stopped and turned to Daryl as she did.

"Daryl? Right?" He recognised her from the woods, but she was grabbed and shoved out of the room by Dwight.

"Don't you speak to him" he heard as the door closed.

Daryl looked squarely at Negan, his chin defiant.

"I know what y'are" Negan laughed, a loud roar which came from deep in his belly.

"And I know what the fuck you are! Ain't that grand? Didn't you think you were the only one?" He got close to Daryl, staring him in the eye, and paused. Daryl didn't answer and Negan chuckled again. "She knows too" He continued in a much more serious manner "she knows our secret and son," Negan moved back out of Daryl's space and pointed his bat at him. "that is against the mother fucking, dick-loving, rules." Daryl startled at that. Merle had never said he couldn't tell anyone what he was. "Y'see" Negan continued regardless of Daryl's worry. "She's still human." He shook his head and made a tutting sound emphasizing every shake. "She's supposed to be one of three things." He ticked them off in his fingers "Food, a mate, or oblivious." Negan sighed but was still smiling. "And she is not any of those damn things right now." His smile got impossibly wider, his eyes twinkling slyly "But she can be." He turned to the door. "Bring it in!" He yelled, the door almost instantly flew inwards, and Evie was dragged in by two men twice her size. It hardly seemed necessary. Negan grabbed her behind the neck and bent her head back. She had a bruise spreading dark purple on her temple

"Evie!" Daryl went to dart forward, but a gun appeared in his face, stopping him dead.

"You don't get to talk to her, but you do have a choice, Daryl" Negan's hand firmed up on the back of Evie's neck, and she drew a breath in through her clenched teeth. Negan dismissed his men with a single look, apparently adhering to the rules himself.

"Look at her Daryl, don't fucking chicken out on me now" Daryl looked up into Evie's face, and though he could tell she was scared, felt it within him, she didn't show it. If anything there was a glimmer of hope in her eyes. Still, he felt his face grimace.

"No" he growled, and Negan all but shook Evie, nearly lifting her from her feet. She didn't make a sound, though she squeezed her eyes closed.

"It's me or you, friend." Negan was grinning, big white teeth gleaming impossibly, Fangs extended and dripping venom as if he meant to do it right there in that room.

"Why's she gotta change?" Daryl asked. "Why'd ya even bring her here? It's me ya wanted" Negan chuckled, nodding his head and bobbing his body. He let Evie go and instead chose to stroke her hair gently. Now she whimpered a little. It was hard to watch, but as Daryl turned his face away Negan screamed at him.

"You will fucking look at her Daryl, you will watch what I fucking do to your girl, and you will decide!" Daryl looked back at them both. "She needs to change because she knows what we are. I don't wanna kill her, shit, although" his voice became a whisper, sounding like he was sharing a secret. "that's what I'd have done before," he paused and draped his arm over Evie's shoulders. She seemed to visibly shrink under his touch. "No, I don't want her dead. She is hot, and my girls are getting a little weary of my biting." He chuckled heartily, and Daryl had to look away again as Evie flinched at the sound.

* * *

 

"What do you think darlin'?" Negan turned to face Evie. She had no idea what was going on. She tried to stare at him, eyes glued to his, but something about those eyes had her fighting with herself to do so. "You gotta change, I'm sorry, but Daryl over there fucked up. There are rules." He reached out and stroked her hair again, and her mouth opened and gasped involuntarily. "And rules," he continued gently, "well, rules keep us sane, they keep us in line, and they keep us on the same team, fighting for the same cause." He smiled, and though she was scared, though she was desperate to get away from this, she acknowledged, deep down, it was a beautiful smile. "20 or 30 years ago Daryl would have been killed, in the most horrific way for sharing our secret, luckily for him the tables have turned and there aren't that many of the Great Elders left." Negan straightened and stepped back. "Jesus fucking Christ on a stick, you would be a good looking Succubus." He turned to face Daryl "she's a good choice for a mate, I see what you did there." Negan turned back to Evie, and she glared over his shoulder at Daryl, who was staring right back stoically, but she could feel his fear, heartache. He didn't want this for her, and now it seemed he had no real choice.

"I don't want to be a vampire." Evie said, tearing her eyes from Daryl and looking again at Negan. She tried to be firm, though it was tough going. Negan's face changed, and he got angry again.

"You think you have a choice? You think you're going to swan in here, kill my men, take everything over and not have to pay?" Evie went to open her mouth, to say she had killed no one, but Negan swiped his hand across her face, knocking the words out before they came. Her head rocked to one side, her hair whipping around her neck.

Daryl let out an almighty growl, like a real animal, like something she'd once seen in a nature show, and she'd barely straightened herself when Negan was knocked away. Daryl had launched himself at the older man, the Elder, and now they really were going to be in trouble.

 


	60. Chapter 60

Daryl had been fighting his hunger for hours.

It wasn't like with humans. Fear, heartache, stress and guilt didn't sate his appetite. If anything it made his need for blood greater. He'd been seeing the world through dimming colours by the hour, and as Negan drew back his free hand and slapped Evie the colour drained from the world, and he saw that veil of red he'd seen only once before. He landed on Negan before he realised he was moving, crashing into Negan's left side with an almighty crack as their rock solid bodies connected. They fell to the floor and Daryl hissed violently in Negan's face, teeth extended and dripping clear viscous venom. Negan was taken off guard, the older vampire should have been able to stand his ground.

Daryl reached his hands for Negan's throat, burying his fingers into the older man's skin, his nails drawing blood, compressing the Adam's apple with his thumbs. He couldn't believe it could be so easy. After all the time spent creeping around and picking off saviours one by one. He let his face fall into the lopsided smile he was sure hadn't been seen for a long time, but was astounded when Negan threw a grin right back at him.

"You know better, Daryl." He said, still smiling, voice a little hoarse but not struggling to speak. He grabbed Daryl's wrists with his own hands and pushed Daryl off, and though it seemed to his own eyes completely effortless, Daryl was flung into a table across the room, noisily knocking over the glasses on top. They tinkled and clattered to the floor in shards. Evie was stock still watching it all wide eyed. Daryl could feel her anxiousness, knew she didn't know what to do, how to do it. This was all new to her, even though she knew He was a vampire, he'd behaved as humanly as possible. Daryl righted himself and Negan was in his face in a flash, a single hand around Daryl's neck.

"If you ever fucking try anything like that again I will kill your bitch in front of you, and then all your friends, one by one, slow, and painful, until you're begging for your own death in heartache." A weird sob escaped Evie, but Negan's voice was soft, low, and it made him seem all the more menacing. Daryl swallowed, and one side of his mouth sneered, his chin defiant, but his heart was hammering in his chest. "I let you off so lightly bringing you here, you fucking young'uns, fucking foundling bastards, Je-sus Christ." Negan shook his head and took a deep breath, grabbing Evie again and pulling her close. He put his nose to her neck and sniffed heavily, eyes on Daryl, running his nose up her neck and into her hair. Daryl clenched his jaw ever harder, back teeth pulsating with pressure, and Evie looked like she might be sick.

"Stop." Daryl managed, feeling breathless. "Stop this now." His heart continued to hammer against his rib cage.

"Well, that's up to you." Negan pulled his face away from Evie's hair at length. "You need to make your choice, Daryl. You know the rules. I'm older, stronger, and therefore superior to you." Daryl's face must have let his feelings show, he had no idea what Negan was talking about. Negan sighed, "Mmmmm this one smells like summer rain, you ever notice that?" Daryl didn't answer, just glared at the man in front of him. Could he trust him, what he said about rules? Daryl had never been a stickler for those anyway, but since becoming the monster he now was he'd realised there were some rules and regulations that were ingrained, bred into him, and he couldn't break them, even if he wanted to.

He wondered if the tug in his head had been one of those. Had Negan called him and his body answered without him knowing? He would never have done anything so careless as he had the previous day if he had been under his own control, would he?  
They were just excuses, he was trying to find someone to blame. This was his fault, all his fault, regardless of what kind of Creature he or anyone else was. Negan was looking at him quizzically.

"You have no idea, do you?" Negan asked him "you really do not fucking know what kinda shit you would've been in for any of this, do you?" Daryl didn't answer, but shook his head slightly. As he did so Negan roared with laughter. "Fuck. Fuck, man, how did you survive in the old world? You didn't know!?" Daryl narrowed his eyes, and tore them away from Negan to look at Evie, to check She was ok. Knowing he wanted confirmation she nodded gently, barely noticeable. "Right, fuck this shit, you're gonna turn this fine human being into an even finer vamp' and then we're gonna have a chat."

"Ain't turnin' 'er." Daryl said instantly, and Negan shook his head solemnly, the grin falling from his face.

"I didn't ask if you wanted to, Hell, it's a fucking order. Cause if you don't," Negan stroked his hand over Evie's hair again, and Daryl growled low in his chest "then I will, and you do NOT want that."

* * *

 

Glenn and Abraham were dead, Evie kept reminding herself about that. As Daryl and Negan fought, and then chatted, she reminded herself that this man, this beast, had brutally and emotionless battered two of her family to a bloody pulp. She caught her breath as she remembered, and Negan seemed to breathe in her gasp as he sniffed her neck and hair.

They paid her very little mind as they spoke of vampiric rules. Eventually Daryl cast a worried eye over her and she nodded, yes, she was ok.

When Negan again demanded she was changed her heart almost stopped.

She'd been torn about that for months. She wanted to be with Daryl, forever, for him to never be alone. But at the same time  
She had no idea what being a vampire entailed, how hard it was for Daryl to remain as human as he did, how it felt to relive every moment of your life over and over again in photographic memory. She'd wanted it and not wanted it in equal measure. Changing under duress had never even been an option to think about.

Now she was scared.

Negan grabbed her bicep far too hard and began speaking into a walkie, and panic seemed to suddenly consume her. She pulled her arm as if she might shrug Negan off, but he held her so easily, continuing his calm conversation.  
"And get Fat Tony to chuck in a bucket of water for me, room 4, it's the biggest and easiest to clean." Where the hell were they going? Evie tried yanking her arm again, couldn't pull it away, and as the radio crackled and someone replied,Negan was walking her forward like she weighed no more than a single pound. "Come on Daryl, you follow me." Negan yelled at the door in front of them. "Dwight!" And it opened. Had he been there the whole time? Evie looked at his scarred and blistered face, but it didn't show he suspected anything, or expected anything after all the growling and crashing. Evie had her wits enough to frown at that. "Escort Daryl to room four, for me" Negan demanded, and Dwight gave a nod, grabbing Daryl much the way Negan held Evie, and they walked along a maze of corridors like the weirdest double date she'd ever seen.

When they arrived to where they were going, Negan relieved Dwight, asking him

"did you do the thing?" Dwight nodded without hesitation.

"Of course I did." Negan nodded with a smile, and sent the burned man away.

The door in front of them was nondescript. It had no number, Evie wondered how anyone knew it was four. Negan pushed it open and shoved Daryl in before following with her in tow. Daryl snarled as he hit the opposite wall, coming face to face with two polaroids.

"Your buddies," Negan said, shutting the door behind him. "I don't know their names, I don't give a shit, but on the left is, was, whatever," he laughed to himself "big red, and on the right the little chink." Negan let Evie go and walked forward to admire his handiwork, caught forever on film. He looked both pictures over, and nodded seemingly satisfied. Evie felt sick, nervous, she had no idea what was about to happen to her, and no one was forthcoming with information.

Negan huffed A small laugh to himself, and turned back to them both before him. Evie wondered why Daryl hadn't resisted more, wondered what the hell was going on with him. She couldn't feel him, not a thing, and as he looked anywhere but the polaroids Negan grabbed him at the back of the neck and pushed him harshly against the wall, holding his nose to the polaroid on the right.

"You did this." Negan hissed, fangs catching the little light in the room and glistening. " _You_ got your friend killed, and you have to face that, every fucking day for the rest of your life." He pushed Daryl's head into the wall and Evie stepped backwards one step towards the door. A crack appeared in the wall, spreading both upwards and downwards from where Daryl's forehead hit it. He didn't flinch, but Evie did, how strong was Negan that he could throw Daryl around? She rubbed her bicep mindlessly. She already knew the answer to that question. "Enough of this shit." Negan said "this whore needs to change, and I'm being a good guy and letting you do it, Daryl, so she's still yours." He laughed "do you know how?" Daryl sneered.

"A'course I know how." He answered roughly. Negan grabbed Evie and dragged her forward.

"Door's locked, I told everyone to give us some room, the floor is yours." He chuckled, pushing Evie towards Daryl, who caught her gently. "This should be interesting" Negan moved towards a dark corner of the room, the overhanging bare bulb's light not reaching so far. "ties on the floor next to the bucket, I reckon you'll need those" Evie frowned and looked up to see Negan removing his leather jacket to reveal muscular biceps.

"Why do we need... what's going to happen?" Negan just smiled and she turned her worried eyes to Daryl who looked completely defeated. "Why aren't you stopping this?" She heard Negan laugh from the darkness. "I don't want this! Not like this." Daryl went to reach for her, but she pushed his arms away. "I'm scared, Daryl." She whimpered quietly, "I have no idea what's going on and I'm scared." Daryl nodded and reached for her again. She let him hold her and he kissed the top of her head.

"I know. I've no choice. If he does it, if Negan's your maker, you'll be bound to him. This way, you'll be bound to me, and I won't ask anything of you." He sniffed dramatically and Evie realised he was crying. She felt his hands tense behind her, and he wrapped a zip tie around her wrists. "I'm so sorry Evie" when had he picked the zip ties up, how had she. Missed that? There was the familiar ripping sound and they tightened painfully against her wrists.

"Hey, that's a bit tight" Daryl didn't reply, but he kissed her cheek softly before zip tying her ankles together. He stood and looked at her for the first time since they'd entered the small square room which was badly lit and bore the photographic evidence of their friend's deaths. He was crying, big fat tears rolled down his cheeks, and if she could, she would have wiped them away. As it was she was stuck. If she moved, she would fall.

"I'm so sorry," he said again. "This is gonna hurt like a bitch, n there ain't nothing I can do to help, not this time." Evie was aware of Negan's gleaming fangs in the corner, but suddenly it didn't matter.

* * *

 

Daryl wound his hand into Evie's curly auburn hair and pulled her head back, exposing her long pale neck. He took a breath. Her fear, her elevated heart rate, had her scent pulsating towards him. The throb of her heartbeat in her exposed neck obvious to his eye. She had no idea what this entailed, and he already felt like piece of shit for having never told her. She had asked and he'd avoided the question. It was made worse now that Negan was there, watching their every move. He couldn't fake this.  
He opened his mouth and dropped his fangs, leaning close to her neck he whispered

"It'll be over soon" the only source of comfort he had. He breathed her in again, and then buried his teeth into her jugular. She spasmed, moved her arms and he felt she wanted to claw at him, but tied as they were behind her there was nothing she could do. She opened her mouth and gurgled, eyes wide, as her hot red blood squirted hard and fast into his mouth.

He closed his eyes, wanting this over quickly, but a deep and dark part of him was enjoying it, and his cock hardened uncomfortably in his jeans. He tried not to think if that had happened to Merle. He hoped it hadn't. He tried not to think of the time lost all control and killed Louann.

The taste of her fast flowing blood was stronger than any he had taken from her before.

"Hurry it up Daryl, you're gonna lose her." Negan's voice sing-songed behind him, but he ignored it. She hadn't even begun to pale, and there was no way he was going to let her die. He just had to drain her, and replace the blood, without her passing out.  
If Merle could do it, anyone could.

Evie's jerky movements began to lose volition, and it was almost time, but she tasted like heaven, and he was loathe to stop.

"Daryl" he ignored the urgency in Negan's voice, even though he could feel the blood flow slowing, and he opened his eyes and saw her lips were turning blue, her breathing was shaky at best, and her wide eyes had narrowed sleepily. She tried to speak again, but blood bubbled from her mouth.

It was time, and he honestly wasn't sure if she'd be better off dead.


	61. Chapter 61

He resolved to change her, knowing his life would be more than worthless without her. Evie had gone completely slack in his arms, he lay her on the floor very gently, and looked her over.

"Bucket of water," Negan said from his dark corner, "she passes out you use that to wake her back up." Daryl ignored Negan's voice, pushing it back. He'd deal with that asshole and what he had done later, now Evie was in a critical position. She mumbled, gurgled, in the back of her throat, and a series of coughs escaped her, blood and spittle decorating her chin. He'd punctured something he shouldn't have, he certainly didn't remember coughing up blood.

He took a deep breath and looked at the puncture wounds in her neck, he'd have to make them bigger, rip apart the skin with his fingers, as he bit into his own wrist. He swallowed, wiped at his mouth and was surprised at the blood that came away.

This was a delicate operation, and he wasn't sure he could manage it. Evie could die, right there on the floor of a cell like some kind of asshole. At that moment something in his venom was keeping her alive, but it wouldn't last long.

He took another breath and bit hard into his wrist as he fingered her neck, digging at the holes he created in order to stretch them and the artery beneath. He grimaced at the taste of himself on his tongue, and hissed as his finger found something inside Evie's neck, the spongy cartilage of her throat. She coughed again, and he pulled his fingers free, putting his fangs back to his wrist and ripping a chunk of skin away. Blood arched high above his head, and he swung his free hand to grab the length tubing he'd seen on the floor beside the bucket.

Trying not to think of germs, infection, and what may or may not have been on that floor in the past, he buried one end in her jugular, and the other in his bleeding wrist.

"Well fuck, that could've been a hell of a lot more smooth. Congratulations, you're a daddy." Negan chuckled, but Daryl ignored him, keeping his eyes on Evie, looking her over. Watching for signs this whole mess was working, for her lips to pink, her cheeks flush with colour.  "It'll take a while." Negan said. "Why don't we talk about those rules?" Daryl turned his head slightly

"Don't need to know about no damn rules, din't ya hear? The damn world ended. Make more sense to wait 'til she wakes up, anyway, She's gotta hear 'em too." Negan laughed again.

"Boy, when she wakes up she is not going to be listening to anything we say. She's gonna be so full of anger, and wonder and hunger... hell, she might even be horny. I know I was." Daryl frowned.

"It ain't the same for everyone?" Negan stepped into the light and shook his head.

"Nope. It could go one or many different ways at all at once. You've not been like this too long, have you, Daryl?" Daryl chewed his lip, Evie's face was finally gaining some colour, and some fleshiness, her breathing was evening out.

"About a year, 'fore the world went to shit." He answered finally. Evie's odd mumbling gurgles tapered off, she hadn't been silent the whole time, she'd been trying very hard to speak even if it was bound to be delirious nonsense.

"Ho-ly shit, Dare. I knew you were young but, fuck, you're just a baby!" Daryl rolled his eyes.

"Don't matter, though, does it? I am what I am." Negan laughed heartily

"And that's all that I am" he added, shaking his head with a smile, fangs catching the light. Daryl noticed they were dripping venom, and he knew the whole debacle had turned the monster on. The thought made him angry, how dare he look at he and Evie that way? She could have died as Daryl fumbled, messing shit up, and that made him horny? He growled, an involuntary noise that emanated from somewhere deep inside him, low and rumbling. Negan cocked an eyebrow and moved forward.

"That shoulder of yours ok? Shouldn't have let the bullet meld in there. We'll get the doctor to check that out." Daryl didn't care about his shoulder, which had already healed, trapping the bullet beneath his skin. When they got out of there it would be just the reminder he needed again that he was a survivor.

* * *

 

Evie was waking up. The feeling both familiar and new. She could hear a thumping rhythm, like heartbeats in stereo, That was completely new, and she could smell dust burning on a lightbulb. She seemed to remember waking up to smell Daryl, hear branches and leaves caressing the roof, But this time was different.

Something... something was different. She could smell Daryl, stronger than ever. He was worried. Worried! After everything he'd done. But there was another scent on the air, aside from faeces and urine and vomit and the alluring autumnal smell of Daryl, there was a strong dark smell, like liquorice, not unpleasant but not quite appealing. Negan. The man who killed Glenn and Abraham.

Her eyes shot open and she sat bolt upright taking a gasping breath. Breaking out of her ties with ease she clawed at her neck, finding the tube which had been inserted, and ripped it out without a second thought.

That noise! Those banging drums, where the hell was it coming from?

She looked around wide eyed, spied Daryl and grabbed him around the throat. She didn't fail to notice the brightness of the colours around her. She realised the banging was hearts beating, as she felt the matching pulse in Daryl's neck under her fingers. Both on their knees Daryl glared at her, his navy eyes sprinkled with green and gold, as she attempted to squeeze the life out of him. He no longer felt warm under her hands, but like their bodies were running at the same temperature. It scared her, surprised her, despite knowing she was now exactly the same as him, as both of them. She was monumentally angry, and she had her suspicions as to why, but nothing was making much sense.  
Negan started laughing, a roaring bellow that couldn't be ignored. Evie pushed Daryl away and he fell to the floor in a heap.

"What the hell have you done to me?!" She yelled at him, looking down at his face. She felt a click in her gum and her fangs fell into place, extended and already dripping. She hissed, hating the feeling of her teeth being too big for her mouth.

"I had no choice." Daryl answered, getting up. "What would ya've rathered? Huh? Him?" Daryl pointed at Negan and Evie shook her head, stepping slowly, elegantly towards Daryl.

"Not like this." She said softly, her voice like tinkling glass to her own ears. He could have stopped this, she thought. He could have ended this before it started and he'd pussied out taking the human option. She sneered at him. "You fucking coward." Negan laughed again, and Evie turned her head to him. His voice grated on her, irritating like tinnitus.

"You!" Negan said "you look beautiful! How do you feel?" Evie snapped at him.

"How do you think I feel?" Negan shrugged,

"You hungry? 'Cause I am fucking parched." Evie felt her face soften, ran her tongue over fangs, she hadn't noticed it before, but she was hungry, Hell, she was starving. As if some switch had been flicked, the colour began to run out of the world before her very eyes.

"Evie." She turned to Daryl, he reeked of concern and guilt. "Not with him." His voice took on a demanding tone though he spoke gently. He narrowed his eyes at her, and she knew she couldn't go with Negan, couldn't trust him. Of Course she knew that, she was just feeling very fuzzy and confused.

"You did this." She whispered, though both men heard her perfectly. Daryl sighed heavily and Negan chuckled.

"I am bored of this shit." He picked his walkie from his belt and spoke quietly into it. Turning away from him, not interested in his damn conversation, Evie eyed Daryl carefully. He seemed so small, so insignificant, and she felt bitter.

The sound of the door being unlocked had them both standing to attention, and Dwight's face appeared beyond it. A noise escaped Evie like none she had ever heard. She felt the rumble in her chest and realised she was growling.

She'd been reduced to a beast by these two men. Her face sneered, and it felt right, comfortable to do so. She wanted to bury her fangs in his neck, which was a completely new sensation, but Daryl's hand grabbed her wrist, and she steadied herself. She frowned, sure she was as strong as him, but she couldn't seem to break free.

Dwight smelled of earth and gravel a dirty scent which suited him right down to the ground. He looked at her curiously, noticing some change she assumed, and then flicked his eyes to Negan.

"Take this beautiful creature to her own cell." Negan said "me and Daryl have some unfinished business"

"You want her bent?" Dwight asked cryptically and Negan shook his head,

"No, she's feisty, we'll keep her as she stands." Evie regarded them both, shaking her head.

"I'm not staying." Negan shrugged his shoulders

"Oh, you are." He smiled, bearing perfectly white, perfectly human, teeth.

"Do what he says." Daryl interjected before she could open her mouth to argue, and like a snap of the fingers, she had no choice. As her maker, Daryl clearly had the upper hand, and as Dwight grabbed her arm roughly, she couldn't resist. Being controlled in that way angered her, and already bitter she hissed at Daryl

"You did this" she pointed to herself and then at Glenn's picture on the wall. "All of this."

She didn't mean it, she would never have been so vile, but everything was new and confusing, and she was so full of rage. She let Dwight lead her away, and the door shut on Negan laughing heartily, and Daryl looking completely despondent. It made her feel guilty, more than guilty! All her emotions were ten fold and she wondered if that were true all through...vampiredom? Were Daryl's feelings as large as hers? It would explain so much, and he must be feeling so remorseful already, without her cruel interjection.

Dwight pushed her gently into another room much like the last one. He went to leave but turned to her before he did.

"Just do what he says. Whatever happens, it's better that way." And then she was plunged into darkness as the door swung closed and a bolt was slid across from the outside.

Her eyes adjusted almost instantly, and she saw she had nothing in this room but herself.  
Still, she began to plan how to escape, mind running at speeds she could never have imagined, playing out theory and consequences, one after the other.

* * *

 

"She's right, you know" As soon as the door was shut Negan's fangs dropped with an audible swoosh. Disgusted with himself, Daryl couldn't even turn to him, and stared at the floor. "You are the reason and the excuse for all of these things and those that come after. Hell, I bet your friends back home are cursing the day they met you. The little lady probably is too." Negan shook his head gently. "Shit, man, lighten up! We're straight, you killed my men, we killed your men..." he laughed and shrugged his shoulders "well, and women... and now, we're straight." He got close to Daryl, moving fast and silent. "All you have to do is what you're told." He whispered in Daryl's ear "that's it." He straightened, appeared thoughtful. Daryl turned his eyes to him. "Of course, there is another option." Negan stroked his salt and pepper beard.

So far his choices hadn't been choices at all. Daryl wondered hat else he could decide he wanted from them. He had Evie changed, he'd killed Abe and Glenn, and Rick was going to bend to him, Daryl knew that the moment Rick had almost cut off Carl's arm. What more could this despicable animal want from them?

"Work with me. You'd be a hell of a fucking asset, can't you see it?" His eyes went distant and he waved a hand through the air "Negan and Daryl, a force to be reckoned with." Daryl frowned "of course Evie would have to be involved, what with you two being bonded" Negan cocked an eyebrow "I guess you don't know about bonding, shit you don't know fuck all else." But Daryl shook his head and recited what he knew.

"Maker and foundling, I know about bonding. I was bonded to Merle, now Evie's bonded to me." But Negan guffawed.

"What? Fuck no! You two are soul mates. You never felt it? You can see it from a fucking mile away." Daryl remembered wondering about that, soulmates, hadn't Beth said they were bonded in his mind? But he couldn't get drawn in by Negan's superior knowledge of that shit, it didn't matter anymore. The elders were all dead, along with many of his friends. He took a breath and wasn't surprised how shaky and watery it was. His guilt was growing, his remorse would never be enough. He knew he had caused this, Evie didn't even have to tell him, he knew.

"Look. You work for me, you become one of my henchmen, I'll let you keep the little ginger-snap and life will be fucking roses. What do you say, Daryl?" Negan grinned his cocky grin, bounced back and forth at the waist like a weeble, and then narrowed his eyes.

"I mean, it's your fault the little chinaman died, no one back home is gonna give a shit if you stay here." Daryl sneered at Negan's soft words, turned the older vampire and felt his canines slide out of his gums. He clenched his fists and squared his shoulders

"He was Korean." He snarled, and Negan shrugged his shoulders.

"Whatever man, the little Chink is dead, who gives a shit?" Daryl, for the third time in his life, and the second time that day, saw red. A wall of crimson blurred his vision and he curled, like a cat about to pounce, and pushed his body forward, bounding into the air and onto Negan's back as he turned away again, shaking his head and laughing like a lunatic.

He hissed and snarled and growled all at once, tearing Negan's leather jacket with his bare hands.


	62. Chapter 62

Scarlet. That was all there was, all there ever was, all there ever would be. Daryl tore the sleeve from Negan's jacket, which he' put back on, and snarled as he all but climbed the older vampire.

"He was fucking Korean, you racist shit." His voice was low, his fangs were dripping clear serum on Negan's now bare forearm, and it sizzled and steamed against his skin. Daryl barely noticed, clinging to Negan's shoulders with his hands and his waist with his legs. The worlds most unlikely piggy back. Beth crossed Daryl's mind, just a flicker, like he'd seen her out of the corner of his eye, but it was enough to make his anger burn hotter, and he roared his discontent in Negan's ear. The older vamp was still laughing, standing as if Daryl's weight wasn't bearing down on his back. Then he bent over as if he was trying to throw Daryl over his head, but instead straightened abruptly, stretching out his arms and launching Daryl into the wall behind them both.

A new crack appeared above Daryl's head and he landed in the floor in a heap.

"I liked that fucking Jacket man, what the fuck're you doing?" Daryl snarled again, unperturbed by Negan's strength, and launched himself forward once more. As their bodies crashed into each other an almighty crack was heard throughout the rest of the compound. Daryl pulled back his arm, clenching his fist as he did so, and punched Negan square in the jaw. There was a crunch under his fingers as the mandible came loose of the maxilla. Negan roared in agony and threw his own punch, and Daryl's face exploded with pain as his cheek bone splintered and broke, breaking through the skin and sending blood pouring down his own face. His eye began to throb and swell, and Negan took the opportunity to push Daryl yet again into the wall. Colour flooded Daryl's vision once more.

Split apart, a distance of a few feet, each man took a moment to rearrange his face. Daryl dove into his own wound and placed the bones of his cheek back where they should be. His eye was already starting to calm, he didn't want the break to heal incorrectly. Negan used two hands push his jaw back into place.

"I'm trying to be reasonable, Daryl, I'm offering you a way out." Daryl pulled his hands from his cheek as the skin visibly started to heal. The blood ran back up his face and into the wound.

"Ya gotta be fuckin' kiddin' me." He managed, stretching his jaw to ensure it was healing right. "Don't need a damn way out. Me n Evie n everyone's jus' fine as we are." Negan was carefully removing his jacket again. He folded it and laughed, looking up once more at Daryl who leaned against the wall.

"Oh, you think so?" Daryl narrowed his eyes,

"Yeah I know so." He managed, launching at Negan again who dodged him this time, sending him crashing to the floor.

"Hey!" There was a flurry of banging on the door. "Alright in there boss?" Negan rolled his eyes and looked at Daryl.

"Fine, me and Daryl're just talking. Ain't that right, Dare?" Daryl stood up and shook himself off.

"I'm done talkin'. Take me to Evie." Negan sighed

"You don't get to be with her right now. But we'll find you a place to stay, we'll get this sorted out." Negan grabbed his walkie, summoning guards to come and take Daryl away. "I don't want to have to use my powers over you, Daryl. I want you to just make the right decisions. I do, however, demand you go with my men and sit in your cell and have a long hard think about my offer. You stay here. You get to keep your soulmate, you get to keep your life. Or, you can continue fighting this and I'll have your head on a spike on my wall. Your choice, your decision." The door burst open and Dwight came in flanked by two other men Daryl hadn't seen before. They grabbed Daryl from seemingly all sides and began to walk him away. Daryl wanted to fight them off but found he couldn't. With a simple word Negan had rendered him useless. With a simple demand, Daryl was screwed.

Maybe he did need to learn the rules, but not from Negan. Maybe someone else could help. Not for the first time he wished his brother was still alive. Sure Merle was an ass half the time, but he loved Daryl and he looked out for Daryl as best he could. He'd have to try and remember everything Merle had told him, every rule and regulation he imparted, once he'd calmed down, and was alone. In that moment he was too angry to think straight, and too worried for Evie to care about how angry he was.

* * *

 

Rules, regulations, dead siblings and dead doctors had all gone from Evie's mind. She punched the door in front of her for the third time, and plaster floated down from the ceiling. The fucker had had them reinforced, she thought to herself, as she shook the plaster from her hair. Her knuckles were bleeding, which she found even more irritating, so she kicked the door instead, it wouldn't budge. It was like Negan expected Vampires to come as house guests. That made her want to laugh, but she was worried if she started down that road, who knew where she'd stop.

She gritted her teeth and kicked the door again. Being a vampire, certainly so far, seemed to be a rollercoaster of human emotions gone haywire and apparently a strength that didn't even help her achieve anything.

She looked at her hand. Her knuckles had already healed. She guessed that was a bonus, but still she huffed, frustrated, before battering the door again, pounding against it with both palms, but still nothing came back to her, and she wondered if there was anyone standing guard. She leant her forehead against the door and closed her eyes, not sure if tuning in to someone else would be automatic, or if she had to do something.

She was miles from home, separated from Daryl who she couldn't feel nearby, in a strange place, in what felt like a strange body. One turn up of this whole thing was that she didn't feel scared. She had begun to forget what that felt like, to not be scared. To not be on the edge of a black hole every second of her waking hours. She guessed she should be grateful, but at least as a human she knew some of her limits, overstepping them was a choice she made, and though it frightened her, causing a chain reaction of instability in her mind, it made her human. Now she didn't know what she was, or how to be Evie anymore.

She opened her eyes when she heard movement on the other side of the door. Her breath caught and she held it, with an ease she guessed she should have expected. She tried to focus on the movement but found she could hear her heart, her blood rushing through her veins, she could hear another heart beating too, as well as footsteps, and voices, and laughing.

It was too much, and she flattened her palms and shoved herself back from the door, stunned, and overwhelmed. This vampire crap was going to take some getting used to.

Her fangs descended and she grimaced, growing angry at her situation again. Daryl. She growled, frustrated. Did he have any idea what hell had he caused?

Of course he did, he'd been there himself. She had to stop being selfish, it seemed that part of her hadn't changed.

She glared at the door in front of her, if he hadn't changed her Negan would have, or even killed her. Daryl did the right thing at the time, maybe this huge cloud of anger would dissipate and she'd be able to think more clearly. Maybe if she wasn't so self Involved she would be able to feel him. Weren't makers and, what did Daryl call them? Foundlings, weren't makers and foundlings supposed to be intricately connected? Considering that she and Daryl were pretty well Connected before, she should practically be able to read his mind.

The world was still black and white, she assumed that was helping her to see in this pitch black room, and her stomach confirmed she was hungry with a little snarl of it's own. She leant against the wall opposite the door and slid down to the floor, leaning her head back she wondered if Daryl could feel her, if he was upset that she was so angry, or upset at what he had done.

Sure, their family were out there, surviving alone now, but they always managed to mourn and move on. Maybe they were making plans to get Daryl and her back.

Maybe not.

She tried to keep the images of Glenn and Abraham at bay, but something inside her had changed and she re lived every detail of their deaths as they ran through her mind again. Abraham's bravery, Glenn's intense love for Maggie showing in their final moments. What did she do at the end of her life? That was a bit of a blur but she was sure it would come back. At the beginning of her new life she'd strangled her maker in a fit of rage.

How very fucking profound.

She couldn't dwell on that. Comparing this, and the way her brothers had reacted to death, was ridiculous. She hadn't suffered, she hadn't had to cling desperately to life to show her loved ones how much they meant to her. Her stomach rolled, and she wondered if vampires could hurl. Poor Glenn and Abraham. Poor Maggie and baby Rhee.

She put a hand to her mouth and choked back a sob. The emotions were worse than when she was hormonal. Incessant anger followed by a deep sadness that seemed to claw its way up from her stomach. She hitched a breath as another sob tried to escape her, but decided holding back was too much like hard work, and she cried freely, sitting on the floor of her cell.

*****

It was hours later, many many hours of rambling thoughts and incessant memories later, that there was movement again beyond the door of her cell.

Without thinking, Evie sniffed the air, and only after realised what she had done. That liquorice smell, dark but not entirely abhorrent, told her Negan was on the other side. She pushed herself back against the opposite wall, tried to get into the darkest of the shadows. Her teeth descended and she snarled as the door opened a crack.

"May I come in?" He asked, as if her denying his entry would stop him. She didn't reply, but as the door swung further she pounced and landed on his chest, growls bubbling from deep inside her as she clawed for Negan's neck, hissing and spitting like an angry cat.

Far too easily Negan pushed her off, she hit the opposite wall with a crack, her skull denting the concrete. She barely felt it, but her ego was a little bruised, and the strength of Negan, who swatted her away like an annoying fly, was enough to stop her launching at him a second time.

She sneered at him, not entirely kowtowed but suddenly aware of just how powerful he was. Negan had narrowed his eyes at her, but his fangs were locked away in his gums and his mouth was smiling.

His eyes were not, but Evie couldn't look at those for too long.

"Show some respect. I got you here, you're alive because of me. Don't fuck that up, you may be new to this whole existence, powerful, beautiful, intelligent. But girl, you are not invulnerable, you are not fucking invincible." He sighed, shook his head a little.

"You still hungry?" She didn't want to admit it to him, not out loud, but she took a step forward and her fangs retracted. She was very hungry, hungrier than she thought she'd ever been before, images flashed in her mind of her family, browbeaten and starving, dehydrated and slow.

Terminus, and after, it had almost killed them. And here she was foaming at the mouth, practically drooling at the suggestion of food, she surely wasn't as hungry as she had been then, ignored by Daryl, feeling like an outsider.

But she was. By god she was.

"You have various options." Negan folded his arms and jutted his chin. Boy, he liked multiple choice! He shared another small smile with her and leaned forward slightly. "I think I know which way you'll go." He straightened again. "The best thing for a new vampire is vampire blood. Daryl's not doing so good, in fact he's doing fucking terribly, you cannot feed off him, it'll make him weak and useless, I need him able bodied." There was a twinkle in his eye which Evie didn't like. What did he mean, able bodied? What the hell was he planning? "So, there's me." Evie gasped. "But as you well know, if we swap blood there's a price to pay, and I don't want you knowing every inch of what I'm doing, when and where." He blew air out of his mouth as though he was thinking. "What Daryl's eating isn't any good, won't sate a newborns thirst, so the other option is human blood." Evie's eyes widened. Negan noticed "Now, there, we have a problem. The rules state no one can know who or what you are. Daryl fucked up on that score, I let him off and the asshole attacked me but, let's let bygones be bygones." He waved a hand dismissively. "Meat won't do it, raw fucking fox ass is not going to satisfy that burning rolling emptiness in your guts." Evie's stomach growled in response and Negan chuckled. "I'll find you some food. I'll find you a willing blood filled sack of useless to eat." He smiled snidely, and Evie knew there was some sort of catch, some aside she hadn't yet been let in on.

"But you make the kill." Negan finished, his eyes dark and his smile stretched across his face. "Because you cannot leave someone alive to tell your story, and you are not going to make yourself an army of vampires on my fucking watch." He chuckled and headed for the door.

"Those aren't options" she called to his broad back, clad in a tight white t. Shirt that showed the muscles tighten and flex as he moved. He stopped and turned his head towards her, looking thoughtful.

"No. I guess they're not." He put his hand on the door and turned to face her. "I'm heading out to your home town in a few days. Give me a story to tell," he shrugged his shoulders "they're bound to ask about you. Whether it's a fairytale or a fucking thriller, now that is up to you. Behave yourself, do as you're told, follow the rules, you'll do just fine." Evie looked up from the spot on the floor she'd been staring at and Negan was already gone. She threw herself at the door, slapping it and kicking.

"I don't know the rules!" She yelled, anger surging through her with an undercurrent of dread. "How can I follow rules I don't know?!"


	63. Chapter 63

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long, I am the queen of a million works in progress, and I refuse to let any of them go, but I may get way laid from time to time.
> 
> Thanks for your patience. I promise not to leave it so long again! I'm hoping to catch up to Canon asap with this one.

Daryl sat on the floor of his cell, sending out feelers for Evie. When she was human, he swallowed and squeezed his eyes closed, hating that he had destroyed that, but when she was, he didn't ever need to find her, search for her.  She was there, all the time, a constant presence in his head.

So had Merle been, Beth too. Where were they now? He wondered if it was him or Evie who had caused this blank space in his mind where she used to be. He could always feel his brother, and the few others, vampires that were around way back when. Shit he even felt Negan, though he hadn't known who or even what that was at the time.

Evie was just gone.

 _That ain't on you._ Rick's voice said in his head, a long ago memory. He covered his ears in the most futile effort to stop it.  
_You're my brother._  
Shit. Who the hell all else was gonna muscle in on this? Carol? Maggie?

Glenn?

Daryl scrubbed his face with the heels of his hands, pressing them into his eyes and forcing himself to see bursts of colour to try to clear his mind. He'd never be able to feel Evie out if he became over run with thoughts of everyone else.

But it didn't help. He wondered how Maggie was, because she sure looked like Hell even before Negan got started, and now, after what he did, after what he caused with his insatiable fucking anger. He never should have let it get the better of him. He knew Negan was an old vampire the minute he laid eyes on him, what made him think he could punch him in the face and that would be ok?

Raw emotion, he _wasn't_ thinking, it was a Dixon speciality. Now Glenn was dead, and it was all on him, all his damn fault, and not Rick's voice nor anyone else's was gonna change that. He had a debt to pay now, to Maggie, to his family, to Evie. But he was trapped in a damn cell a hundred miles from anywhere, and with a single command Negan had rendered him useless.  
He thought about the rules, because he _had_ to get he and Evie out of there in order to make things right. If he ever could. He had to try.

He had managed to ignore Merle. That was the key, he felt sure. Damned Merle. Fair enough he submitted to most of his demands before the world went crazy, but after, he had walked away despite Merle's insistence that they couldn't return to the prison. There had to be a loophole, somewhere.

There was little else he knew about Vampiredom. Foundlings should be subservient to their makers, older vampires had authority over younger ones. Now he understood that human's couldn't know what they were. He wondered if that was the reason Merle had changed him. He didn't know much about the elders, Merle thought they wouldn't get in enough trouble to need to know about them, he even said so.

 _We're small fry in a sea of sharks, don' need no rules, ain't no one watchin' us._ Daryl rested his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands,

Goddammit Merle

_That ain't what I said. Ya losin' ya memory, li'l brother?_

What, Daryl asked silently, gripping his head in his hands as if it might keep his sanity within. - What did ya say?

_I said if we act like small fry, in a sea'a sharks, we won't need no rules. You n ya damn buddy officer friendly jus' about fucked that idea right up! A'course ya gonna draw attention, ya fuckin' lunatic. Lettin' ya damn feelin's get in the way, y'aint a vampire, yer a damn pussy_

Daryl raised his head.

A thought finally struck him, and he knew, suddenly, why he couldn't feel Evie, _and_ how Negan had rendered him so useless.

Because he had let him.

Because his selfishness, his guilt, his anger, had got the better of him. He had left himself wide open.

Well, that was about to change. He wasn't going to just sit back and let Negan take control of him.

As if conjured by his thoughts, the door to his cell opened and Negan stood before him with a knife in his hand, Dwight beside him like a fucking sheep.

"You kneeling yet?" Negan laughed, and Daryl duly curled himself a little smaller against the wall, away from the light that glared from Negan's skin, all but blinding him after his time in the darkness. "Oh don't worry, you will." Negan stepped into the room, confident and sure, "so will your friends, and Evie, shit, she just about already has." Daryl felt his eyes narrow, but didn't move a single other muscle. Negan crouched down next to him, stabbed his knife in the floor violently, and all but stroked Daryl's hair. "She's going to do something very special for me. Very special indeed." He said quietly, softly almost, his fingers glancing on the top of Daryl's ear lightly. He stood again, and Daryl wondered what the Hell Evie would do to make Negan so damn jovial. What would she do to serve a man like that? He felt out for her again.

"You touch a hair on her head." He hissed through gritted teeth, but Negan stopped him with a raised hand.

"Nuh uh uh, watch your respect there, Daryl. I'm the one with the knife, Dwighty is gonna take you to Carson, get that shoulder sorted."

"Shoulder's fine. Ya know it is." Daryl wasn't going to bend to this man. No matter what he was about to do to appear that he was, he knew he couldn't.

"Stand up." Dwight demanded, and though he hated the feeling of giving in, Daryl did so. Negan shoved him against the wall in a flash of movement that would have sent Dwight dizzy. Negan's arm held Daryl's head against the wall across his throat, and the large knife glinted near his eye.

Then, in another swift movement, Negan cut a hole in Daryl's shoulder. It didn't hurt, he didn't feel anything at all, but he grimaced and gritted his teeth around a yell for Dwight's benefit. Adhering to the rules, making it easier on them all. Easier for him when the time came.

"Good boy. Go quickly now," Negan whispered close to his face "don't want that to heal over again." He roared with laughter as Dwight shackled Daryl's arms and feet, and led him out of the door.

Daryl thought about overpowering Dwight, it would be so easy. Choke him with the shackles he wore on his hands and just break free, but that would put Evie in danger, his whole family back home, if they were back home. He had let his raw self overpower him too much. Letting his guard down now would be the end of all of them, and he sure as shit knew it wouldn't be a quick and easy end.

No. He'd go to the doctor and get his damn stitches. He'd sit in his cell and stew like they expected. He'd find Evie eventually, and they'd work this out calmly and logically.

There was no room for emotion to get the better of either of them.

* * *

 

Sherry hopped off the doctors table as they entered, she looked Daryl over as he and Dwight walked in, Daryl was struck by how strange it was to see a woman so dolled up. He wondered if she had any idea about Negan, a clear bruise stood out on her neck which she'd tried to cover with poorly matched makeup. Still, the pancake covered enough, it could have been left by a thumb, or maybe it was a hickey.

The chances were it was a bite, but she hadn't had Negan's blood, she hadn't healed any quicker from that than she would have any other bruise or cut. She still had that purity, if no other.

She spoke quietly to Dwight, then looked at Daryl as she left.

"Whatever he wants, just do it." She said, looking him in the eye, which made him angry, but he held it together. He thought she should have been too ashamed to look at him like that. Unabashed, confident even.

"I said don't talk to him." Dwight said quietly, but demanding. She looked at him over her shoulder and left, without another word. Not the couple Daryl remembered from the woods, they had been in love and on the run, and nothing and no one would stand in their way, now, they had given in. They knelt, like cowards. Daryl grimaced and sat on the gurney, the doctor prodding and poking at his skin, grimacing and sucking air through his teeth when it seemed appropriate.

* * *

Evie paced in her cell. What did Negan mean Daryl wasn't doing so well? What were they feeding him that would be no good for her?

And why the Hell couldn't she feel him? Worry clouded her judgement and she tried desperately to get some feeling that he was nearby, alive, some inkling that Daryl was still there. She wondered if it was a skill she would have to train, or if it would come with time when everything wasn't so new and confusing, and every sdound and smell so damn strong. 

She'd not forgotten that Negan wanted her to make a kill, of course she hadn't, she'd never forget anything again, but it wasn't at the forefront of her mind as she finally got a whiff of Daryl.

Her nose was pressed almost flat against the small seam between the door and its frame in an instant, and she breathed him deeply as his scent wafted down to her. 

"Daryl?" She whispered, wondering if he'd hear, if he'd feel her, wondering if her mind was playing tricks on her. His autumnal, thanksgiving, fragrance filled her nose and a sense of calm seemed to wash over her, enveloping her in a feeling of safety. Finally she wasn't angry, hungry, or confused. She felt protected, loved, assured that no one would ever bring her harm. A feeling of home.

Daryl had never spoken about that feeling. He had never said that Merle felt like home, or that being with Merle could feel so good. Was it a maker/newborn bond, then, or just how Daryl made her feel, magnified a hundred times because now everything felt stronger? Daryl hadnt explained. He never spoke much about being a vampire at all.

She frowned to herself as the feeling swelled, and then she could sense his presence as well as scent him, and she thought her heart might explode with joy.

"Evie." She heard his whisper, like wind chimes on the breeze, but all too soon the dirty earth smell of Dwight was there, and the moment was fleeting, because then he was gone. So was the feeling of safety, and comfort, and home. It only made her feel more alone now it was gone.

She scratched her nails against the heavy metal door which seperated her and her love, ignoring the two that peeled back from her fingers like ring-pulls, pinging to the floor with a gentle tap, inaudible to human ears. Desperately she clawed at the door, like she might dig through it and find herself in Daryl's arms. She wanted to tell him how sorry she was for blaming him, how she hadnt meant a single word she'd said. She wanted him to forgive her, so they could move on, overthrow that asshole aged Vampire Negan together and save the goddamned world. 

She huffed a sigh, slapping the flat of her hand against the cold steel door, wondering how she might break out. Negan or Dwight might come back, and she could slip out quickly, unseen. 

But of course, It wouldn’t work, her mind threw her a hundred reasons why in a few short seconds.

Wow.

She couldn’t help but be impressed, wishing she had more time to get used to all the new ways her mind and body worked. But there was no time, and despite everything, a small part of her blamed Daryl again. She tried to push that away, ignore the incessant anger that tried to creep back, she’d need to be under her own control if she was going to manage to get out of that cell, of the compound, alive. She chewed her tongue and studied the door, wondering if there was something she was missing. She felt around the whole frame, looking for a weakness. There had to be something, a loose screw, or one missing altogether. She had to get out, get Daryl and go home. Alexandria needed them more than ever, and now she was like Daryl, they had a better chance. With the info they had on Negan surely they had an advantage.

***

It was hours later that the door finally opened again. Despondent, having given up trying to break out, Evie sat in the corner, hoping the light from the hall wouldn’t reach her. The scent, strong in her hunger, was both that of Negan and of Dwight. She sneered, eyeing them narrowly. Her world was still black and white, and her stomach rolled at the sight of Dwight. A pulse in his neck clear to her ears, and her eyes. She clenched her jaw, hoping to keep her canines locked in place. It was a difficult task, she was famished, and though he smelled like dirt, she’d have settled for it to sate herself, and have him ended after all he had done.

  
“Today’s the day we go back to Alexandria, and collect what’s ours.” Evie glared up at Negan from her dark corner, he was surrounded by a bright white glow, but it no longer hurt her eyes. Today, she thought, how long had she been looking for an escape? When had she last eaten and how had _days_ passed without her knowledge?

“None of it’s yours.” She said flatly, and Dwight hissed at her, cutting her off.

“You shut your mouth:-“ but Negan put a hand heavily on Dwight’s chest as he leaned forward.

“Easy D. She’s ok by me, a little bitter, a little pissed.” He dropped his hand and shrugged with a smile. “You know, you’d make a good wife.” Evie frowned, Dwight did too. Negan chuckled to himself. “Feisty, cocky, give ol’ Sherry a run for her money.” Evie watched Dwight’s eyes narrow for a split second falling back into their natural wideness so quickly, human eyes would not have noticed. But she did, and she could see Negan had, too.

“Sherry?” She couldn’t help but ask, watching Dwight’s heart break all over his face, again for barely a second.

“Look, we’re going to Alexandria today and we’re going to take Daryl with us. Tell the lady how Daryl is doing, Dwighty.” Dwight sneered, laughed with half his mouth.

“Not good.”

“ _Not_ good!” Negan repeated, louder, emphasising his words with a tilt of his whole body “He is doing _so_ not good I think he might _almost_ be broken, what do you reckon, D?”

“Yessir” Dwight agreed. “Ready to be built back up again soon.” Negan nodded and patted Dwight on the shoulder as Evie contemplated if it was true. She studied Negan’s face, if Daryl was putting on a show for Dwight, Negan had no knowledge of it. She wondered how you would break a vampire, and if it were at all possible. When she’d felt Daryl, only hours ago to her mind but she guessed it could have been days, he seemed... fine. As fine as she would expect. If it really had been days, though, anything could have happened, and guilt ripped through her for not noticing, not feeling it. How could she be so closed off, so selfish, thinking only of her plight. She looked at Negan and narrowed her eyes. This was him, all him and she'd let him do it, without hardly a thought.

“I can’t feel him.” Negan smiled, a big toothy grin.

“Nope. That was the plan.” Evie cocked her head to one side, still unable to look into Negan’s deep brown eyes for long.

“How did you do that?” She questioned, unable to believe that anyone could get between her and Daryl, their bond was like nothing she'd ever known. Negan turned to Dwight and gestured at the door, and like a good little sheep, Dwight left. He didn’t go far, Evie could still smell the dirt of him, hear his heartbeat and almost taste his sweat. It was foul, but she salivated anyway, she was so hungry.

“Because I’ve weakened you both.” Negan said darkly, his voice deep and quiet. “You’re starving, which is the only way to weaken a new vamp, and Daryl is malnourished, even if he’s not hungry, he just gave you half his own blood, filled you with his own life to make you what you are. he was already weakened before we started, thanks to you. I’m barely keeping both of you alive.” He spread his hands palm up to his sides. “It’s the only way to keep you both from making plans of escape together. Two minds might be better’n one, but two vampire minds are better than a hundred.” Evie listened to Negan with great interest, his inflections and emphasis, how he bobbed around at the waist. But she had one eye on the door.

“You’re weak.” Negan continued. “You’ll never make it out that door alive, sugar.” She flicked her green eyes back to him and narrowed them, defiantly jutting her chin and standing a little straighter

“I could try.” She was a vampire now, afterall.

“Nope. Your maker told you to do as you were told, and sweetheart, that’s all you can do.” Evie pinched the bridge of her nose, exasperated. Still no one had explained these rules to her, and there was so much to know, the middle of being captive was the worst time to change, apparently.

“I’ll feed you, soon.” Negan said conversationally. “You won’t die of starvation, but you’re weak as a kitten without blood.” He thrust his hand forward into her auburn curls and pulled her head back by the roots of it. Evie tried to pull her head forward again, failing miserably and instead attempting to dig what was left of her fingernails into the flesh of Negan’s arm.

Nothing seemed to make him pull away, nor even flinch. His skin felt hard as iron, but her nails did find purchase.

“New vampires are the strongest, they’ve no control of their strength.” Negan was saying as Evie’s fangs slipped from their casings in her anguish. “I can’t have a captive newbie in good health.” She clawed at him, burying her nails into his forearm, and though she drew blood, which strengthened his scent and made her fangs drip venom, he continued to smile, and not to struggle at all. It was frustrating, and Evie felt the rumble deep in her chest that emanated from her before, a low animal-like growl she couldn’t control. Negan let her go as suddenly as he had grabbed her, and Evie sank to the floor feeling completely powerless.

“We’ll get you fed. I’ve a feeling someone is about to do something very stupid, and unwittingly make themselves baby food. In the meantime sweet cheeks your gonna sit there and think about what being a vampire means to you, and how exactly you’re gonna thank me for all the new wonders of the world I’ve given you.” He grinned again, an evil looking grin that didnt reach his eyes, and headed for the door, which Evie launched herself at a second too late. It closed against her, again, and she yelled

“You gave me nothing, nothing!” If he hurt Daryl, she swore to god she would get revenge.

She couldn’t feel him, and now that it made sense it was worse. The reason she could only feel him when he had walked by was because she was starving, and he was broken. Broken. Her heart felt like it shattered in her chest and she slunk back from the door. Broken. She wanted to fix it, and was sure she could, If she could just get out of that damend cell.


	64. Chapter 64

Between the doctor and the run to Alexandria, for Daryl there were just short bursts of consciousness. Unlike Evie, who had been awake the whole time, he had dipped in and out, unable to stay completely conscious in his malnourished state. 

Despite wanting to be strong, and his epiphany that it was his own fault he was out of control, letting these people get to him, he hadn’t been able to stave off the guilt. What he had done to Evie, what he had dragged his family into by chasing Dwight. By not killing him in the first place. He closed his eyes as if it might make relentless image of Glenn disappear, his heart wrenching. Sure, he was a strong and almost invincible creature, but he still had thoughts, feelings that were stronger than ever before. 

The concrete of the floor in his cell was cold, and if he had been human his bare ass would have been cold against the stone, his hips would have become numb with it, but he wasn't human, he could barely feel the cold seeping into his skin and his bones, despite the goose-flesh that crawled up his arms and down his legs, his skin was cold, his senses didn't feel it.

He'd been naked for days, stripped of his possessions, his clothes, and perhaps they thought his dignity, but in his own mind he deserved every piece of shit they gave him. The dog food sandwiches were a welcome distraction from the foul taste already furring up his mouth, Evie's blood, and the guilt of what he had caused, for her, for Maggie, to Glenn. 

He'd vomited. That was... new. He'd never done so as a vampire, and rarely as a human. Unsure whether it was the pet food, the shock to his system, the lack of light and human contact, maybe the images that refused to leave his mind of Glenn being killed, over and again, on a loop as long as time itself. It felt good to be empty, like the void was a deserved emptiness. 

He'd yelled, screamed, and cried. A million emotions fighting to be the one he took notice of, he'd clawed at the door, just like Evie had, his fresh new fingernails flicking from his fingers, just like hers did. he didn't notice, he didn't care. If there were such a thing he would have welcomed the pain. He _wanted_ the pain, but he felt none. Life was unfair that way. 

When he wasn't conscious, not in any real sense of the word at least, he did his best not to think. He stared into the dark shadows until they seemed to bounce around before his eyes, jumping and moving, ghosts of a long dead past trying to make themselves known. 

He gave up trying to feel Evie. He had tried to find her, for a long time, but he couldn't, and he knew she couldn't, either, Negan had made it clear she hadn't been fed, and a new vampire devoid of sustenance was a weak and pointless monster. 

That's what she was now, that was what he had done. Created a beautiful monster.

***

He'd tried to escape, Dwight had disappeared and some new guy had brought his sandwich along, which he now ate regardless of the filling. He had to eat. He'd eat shit if he thought it would help any. This new guy, whose scent wasn't discernible underneath the stink of stale sweat on his skin, Daryl's malnourished body pulling back on the 'superhuman' senses, seemed pre-occupied, and had left the door open, and Daryl had slipped out, planning to escape, maybe finding Evie, and killing these fuckers before heading home.

But he hadn't managed, he hadn't got very far at all. He'd been surrounded, and he thought he could do it, he thought he could take every last one of the fuckers out, but he was weak, and he was depressed, and he just didn't have the energy. When Negan came out swinging his damn bat, whistling that irritating non tune, Daryl wondered if he'd even a feel a blow to the head. if he'd even notice that he'd gone the way of... countless others. Shit he deserved it for all he had done. For all he didn't do. 

"Evie" he had grunted at Negan, meaning it to be a demand for answers, but all he could manage in his barely standing state of undernourishment, wanting to ask where she was, how she was, and why he couldn't feel her, and Negan had laughed, braying like a donkey, and let his men beat Daryl to a fine pulp, and Daryl let them, because there was no other choice anymore. 

***

His chains clanged together noisily as his body rolled with the movement of the van. He picked out a point on the floor between his feet and held his gaze there, barely blinking. He knew where they were going, he knew what was about to happen, and he just felt hopeless to stop it.

Negan had gone to him early, and hit him several times to ensure his face was still the bruised and bloodied mess the saviours would expect. When Daryl hadnt reacted, Negan had stopped and studied him a long moment.

"Shit, Did we go too far?" He asked no one in particular, then smiled to himself 'Nah!" and hit Daryl again for good measure.

Daryl's lip had split, and he squeezed it between his teeth to ensure it stayed that way. He didn't react to the taste of his own blood. He wished he could feel something, desperate to feel the pain of his bruised and swollen eyes, his split and dripping lip. He buried his teeth into the plump flesh of his bottom lip again, so hard that they pierced straight through it, and as the van hurtled to a heavy stop, his teeth gnashed together with an audible crash. 

"Jesus Christ!" someone yelled, a woman, brash and dressed like she ran a biker bar back in the old world. She punched the bulkhead separating her and her cargo from the driver "Take it fucking easy, asshole!"

***

He flinched away from Rick as he reached for him, rasping out his name, a question in his eyes ‘brother’ those eyes said ‘are you ok?’ But Daryl just flinched back, eyes squinting in the bright sun he was still not used to. The hurt 0n Rick’s face, the pain in his eyes, destroyed Daryl more than anything else had in his whole life. 

“No!” Negan yelled “You don’t look at him, you don’t speak to him, and I don’t make you cut anything off of him.”

Another little piece of Daryl fell away, as Rick stood before him, holding a very bloody Lucille in his hands, facing a man he didn’t know the half about, his face a picture of pain, bowing down to Negan. If he could break Rick... Daryl’s mind shot to Evie again, and if he had the energy to do so, he might have broken down. 

***

On the way back to the sanctuary, the stinking sack was placed back over his head so he wouldn’t know where they were, a pointless exercise, but how would he complain? Negan knew what he was doing, and it was clear that no one in his care knew what he was. Not even his wives, who took to his biting like teenagers getting hickeys.

“Can’t wait to get back to the little red head” Negan said, arranging the bag on Daryl’s head as he stood there helpless to do anything. His body would soon start to deteriorate, he was sure, the dog food and bread was no sustenance for a vampire. He wondered how he would die, his superhuman senses had already disintegrated to nothing.

But mention of Evie almost made his ears prick, and his mouth tried to hiss though no sound escaped him. His teeth tried to descend but snagged and stay put, his body unable to expend the energy for anything other than a meal.

“Yeah,” Negan must have noticed the minuscule reaction, he sounded triumphant, “gonna see if _that_ hot mess wants to come and _make_ a hot mess in my quarters.” Daryl gritted his teeth hard, sure Negan was just looking for a reaction. He would give him none, but a spark, a small glowing ember, had finally been relit inside him. He may have been weak, but he was weak for a vampire. He could still overpower a human if he had to, his body, after all, depended on that. 

“I think we did it” he heard Dwight say. “I think he’s actually broken.” There was a pause, then a low hum as Negan thought that over.

“I wouldn’t count ya dicks just yet, D, this one’s a clever fucker.” 

* * *

Evie Wondered at how, once upon a human time, she had been desperate for four walls and a roof, she wondered at how she'd been so disgusted at staying in an outhouse to hide from walkers.

At least then she had Daryl, before she knew what he was. Before he made _her_ what she now was.

She sighed. The cell she was in, the four walls and a roof she now occupied, was a gruesome hole that stunk of bodily fluids, and now it hit her that the smell she couldn't place before was semen and she felt no better for finally figuring that out. She grimaced, pulled her hands from the floor where they rested either side of her and placed them on her lap instead, wrinkling her nose. 

She had long since stopped trying to find Daryl, sure that his malnutrition was rendering his scent, and his feelings and emotions, weaker than usual. That's why she hadn't been able to sniff him out until he had walked right by her cell door. She surmised, quite rightly, that her own starvation was actually putting her more in tune with the world around her, although she felt weak, she could still overpower a human.

Especially for a meal.

The thought sent a roll through her stomach. She wondered if she could do it. Make a kill now, as she'd been so squeamish just lately, but she wasn't the same as she had been. The alcoholic, squeamish, part of her was dead. Part of her had died.

Still, she was pretty sure alcohol wouldn't affect her. She wished she knew, but no one around the sanctuary was very forthcoming with facts on Vampires.

She clenched her fist and punched the concrete beneath her, a series of cracks emanating from the floor where it landed. A smile toyed at the corner of her mouth a satisfied feeling flushing through her. 

She heard distant, quiet, footsteps, and smelled the dark liquorice scent of Negan approaching. Her canines dropped an inch from their sockets, and a snarl settled itself on her face. She was getting used to the feeling of her fangs. She wondered, randomly, only briefly, if she looked as hot as Daryl did with a mouthful of sharp teeth and clear venom. It was only a moment, a throwaway thought, but it was enough to make her pupils dilate, and for venom to swell on her fangs a little thicker and faster.

His scent wasnt wholly unpleasant. As the door swung open, Evie now standing in her dark corner, the spicy, dark, sweetness assaulted her starve-heightened senses.

"Ginger snap" he said throatily, and she gently ran her tongue over her own fangs as his glistened in the low light at her. "How're you doing in here, all by yourself?" He asked, shutting the door behind him, and plunging the room back into near blackness, though both vampires glowed. Evie felt her top lip twitch slightly, her face trying to snarl, her mind willing it not to. she'd had an idea, and though it may be fruitless, she had to try just about anything.

"About how you'd expect." She snapped back at him, cringing inside, cursing her new sharp temper "What do you want?" Negan chuckled and shook his head, 

"Ya hungry?" He asked, his eyebrows lifting slightly, head tipped to one side, managing to look both threatening and coy in a single facial expression. Evie was taken aback, it wasn't the question she expected. She was starving, quite literally, but did she want to tell him that? Didn't he want her to make her own kill? She chewed her lip, surprised by how quickly she broke the skin and at how bitter her own blood tasted. Could Negan smell her blood, would he know she was chewing her lip in thought? She hoped not, she didn't want to give him any inkling to her uncertainty. If she could exude confidence, it might knock him back a peg or two.

"Not as much as I am horny" she said, raising her own eyebrow, dipping her head and trying a coyness of her own. "Did you know you smell of Liquorice?" She asked him breathily, taking a step forward and watching his eyes on her, ensuring to hold his hazel gaze as long as she could with wide eyes. "It's all sweet, and dark and sticky" Negan hadn't moved, just watched her as she approached, keeping his head up but his eyes on hers as she got close to him, her head level with his Adam's apple, which bobbed as he swallowed. She twirled a ringlet of sunset hair in her fingers, and finally looked away from him, daring to use her other hand to touch his chest and whisper "I miss the taste of sweet things." The corners of Negan's mouth twitched, and his fangs glistened in their now conjoined aura. He closed his eyes, and took a deep, slow, breath.

"Darlin'," He opened his eyes"I don't think you know what you're saying." Negan's voice was low, quiet, and vibrated through his chest into Evie's hand. "In fact, I think you're so hungry, you'd do just about anything for a decent meal." He chuckled, softly, a sound at odds with the low grumble of his voice. Evie dared to look into his eyes again, and blinked very slowly. If Daryl's eyes had her swimming, Negan's had her drowning, and panic gripped her stomach vice like as she saw the look in his green-brown eyes. She tensed, and her fangs shot back into their sockets noisily, surprisingly painfully, as Negan took hold of her shoulders in big strong hands. 

He shoved her, moving with her, into the concrete wall and her head rocked against it with an audible crack. But she didn’t feel any pain in her head. Negan forced her legs apart with his knee, surprisingly easily, sliding in close until his groin rested against her. She caught her breath, breathing habitually as she had been, as his hand found her neck, and he squeezed firmly leaning his face in close to hers. The whole time his hazel eyes bore into her, dark and angry. Evie thought she was going to die, though Negan couldn’t squeeze the breath from her lungs no matter how hard he tried, she knew full well that she wasn’t invincible.

She wasn’t expecting him to thrust his face into hers, to push his mouth against hers and force her jaws apart. With his fingers still encircling her neck tightly, Negan kissed her hard, roughly, and deeply, filling her whole being with his scent. She kissed him back, unable to resist. No matter that her mind was screaming at the attack, wanting her to turn away, fight back, do something, she physically couldn’t, and as her neck began to turn purple she raked her tongue against his, tasting his liquorice scent in his venom, which dripped thickly from his extended fangs.

Her mind turned to Daryl, and she tried to cry out, but only managed a mumbled groan into Negan’s mouth. She worried it might spur him on, but he wasn’t a stupid man.

He pulled away from her, tightening his grip on her neck and holding her an inch from the floor against the back wall of her cell.

“I would _love_ to take you up on your irresistible offer, Red.” He whispered into her face, his breathing a little unsteady and fast. “Oh boy would I.” He leaned forward, his forehead resting against hers gently. “But I am not that foolish. If you try _anything_ like that again, I will rip that pretty little red head from your slender little white neck, do you understand?” Evie nodded, but she knew she had hit a nerve with him. The kiss was rough, not enjoyable, but he’d been into it.

“I understand” she said, her voice tight. Negan nodded back at her, pulled his head back away from hers at great length, and let her neck go. She fell into a heap on the concrete floor and he turned for the door.

She was righting herself stoiclyas he turned back.

“I’m gonna get you a meal. Don’t make me regret keeping you alive.” She didn’t reply, but as the door slammed closed, the lock shucking loudly home, she bent double and cried out.

She was stupid, playing with fire, and she let it out with that yell, all her stupidity, her nerves, her pain at what she’d almost done.

She was supposed to be strong, fast, smarter now than ever before.

She had never felt more human.

 


	65. Chapter 65

Evie curled tightly around herself in a fetal position on the cold, hard, floor of her cell, not hearing the knock at the door. She didn’t notice it, having not scented anyone, or heard any steps approaching. She was completely lost in herself, having stared into the middle distance for hours as her mind replayed her stupidity back to her over and over again. How she’d kissed Negan, indulged in such an intimacy with him. She could have got herself seriously hurt, or worse, someone else, someone she loved, and for what? What had she gained from trying to seduce the beast that had destroyed her family? She was still locked in a cell, kept away from Daryl, assuming he was even around anymore. Would she know if he wasn’t? Now there was a thought she didn’t want to be having. Negan hadn’t mentioned him, so his initial reason for entering her cell hadn’t been to tease her about Daryl, how she could no longer feel him or scent him. Her own maker, the one person in the world she should feel safe in the knowledge was there for her. She had no clue if he was, or ever would be again.

She registered, finally, that there had been a knock at her cell door, that no one had entered unannounced as usual. She frowned deeply, not sure if she should answer.

“Hello?” She tried, her eyebrows knitted together, her voice pitching up at the end of the word, and the noise of the locks sliding open had her screwing her face up even more. Was this some new game? Treat her with courtesy? A man entered, handsome, tall, with sandy blonde hair and pretty brown eyes. He looked shy, unsure, not meeting Evie’s eyes, and he had in his hand a small piece of paper. She eyed it confused, and he thrust it out to her.

Evie took the note.

“ _For you, darling gingersnap_.” She read,“ _He’s a dumb piece of shit who deserves to be eaten, so don’t feel bad. Don’t you think he smells delicious? Negan”_ she took a breath through her nose, not expecting much, but as the honey sweet aroma filled her head she couldn’t help the twitch on her mouth, a hint of a smile.

 

“Shut the door” she said darkly, and was hardly surprised that her meal had been brought with an escort, and the lock slammed home as the room plunged into darkness without her meal even having to move.

The man’s breathing became fast and shallow. Evie listened intrigued, her head cocked slightly to one side, her own breath held, not that she needed it.

She knew her body was now built to allure and to frighten, that changes had happened to her very chemistry, and frighten she certainly did.

She smiled, feeling her fangs slide smoothly out of their sockets.

“Don’t be afraid.” She said quietly, her voice low and rumbling slightly, sounding nothing like herself. She wondered what his name was, then decided it didn’t matter. She was starved, and this was all they had to offer. Better it remain nameless. She tried to retain some semblance of humanity, but all she wanted to do was rip his pretty head from his body and scoop out the insides with her bare hands, gobbling what dropped from her fingers.

Her stomach churned uncomfortably, a leftover remnant of the queasiness blood had started to bring her before... Before. But as her fangs dripped venom, she took a moment to lick it slowly away, knowing Mr. No Name could see her glistening teeth. She heard his pulse speed up, smelled his scent as it became stronger, and deeper. She smiled gently, enjoying her first moment as the woman in charge. She could tell that this nameless guy was both drawn in by her, and mildly repulsed.

Her stomach rolled gently again, but she was unable to hold off much longer, her hunger swelling and spilling through her, all thoughts of her human life, human thoughts and feelings had departed, she was nothing but a monster now. She growled low in her chest and darted forward grabbing the unnamed man by the shoulders, shoving him into the wall she opened her mouth, ready to bury her fangs into his neck.

But she stopped short, his body pinned against the wall beneath hers. She took a sharp breath as venom oozed over her lower lip.

In all her time as a human, filled with Daryl’s blood, she had notice something.

No one who smelled that good was inherently bad. The men from the Atlanta hospital had stunk of fallen, rotten fruit, Joe and his cronies had an essence of pure molten asphalt. She inhaled deeply, snapping her mouth closed to do so, watching the man beneath her flinch in fear.

Honey. Sweet, slightly cloying but the scent of summer and freshness nonetheless.

She pushed back from him, placing her hands on his shoulders, pushing him hard into the wall and thrusting her self backward a step.

“What did you do?” She asked, breathless in her realisation. “Why does Negan want you dead?” The blond didn’t answer at first, just breathed fast, eyes wide and nostrils flared. He stared at Evie like a deer caught in headlights, fight or flight had long since flown, he was paralysed in his intense fear.

She noticed the smell of it, sweat and adrenaline, in the air around him, and wrinkled her nose. It was exhilarating and she didn’t want it to be. Her respect for Daryl and his control over his instincts was growing rapidly. She didn’t know if she was strong enough for this.

“I... I worked it all out.” His voice was deeper than she expected, almost a baritone but it shook slightly, belying his emotion and negating the sexy way his eyes looked up at her below his brow.

“Worked what out?” Evie questioned, scowling slightly. She took a short step towards him, and he pushed his shoulders into the wall to try and shrink away.

“What he is.” He said gently, eyes darting away from Evie’s. “What you are, what, uh, what you do.” Evie had sidled up close to him again, and she watched wondering if he could squeeze his body into the wall any harder.

“What do we do?” She whispered close to his ear, watching his neck, his Adam’s apple, bob as he gulped hard. His pulse was high, Evie clenched her jaw to try and keep her fangs up in their sockets. Suddenly realising how close she was to this stranger, how near she had come to just burying her face into his neck again.

Daryl had some serious self control. It must have taken so much effort to be human around his companions, and for so long.

She closed her eyes, took a step away, and a deep cleansing breath.

When she opened her eyes again, the man, her meal, was staring at her wide eyed.

“Just make it quick” he said sadly “You have to kill me, or Negan’ll kill us both.” Evie understood that was probably true. That Negan had won this little battle. She had to eat, and her choices were limited. She nodded gently.

“Yeah,” she replied, putting her hand on the man’s arm, feeling him quiver, feeling his pulse. “What’s your name?” She asked sidling up close to him, letting her instincts take more of the lead than her morals.

“Michael,” he breathed. “My name’s Michael Brace.” Evie watched as a tear escaped his eye, rolling onto his cheek. She closed her eyes and dropped her fangs.

“I’ll make it as quick as I can, Michael” she said, before burying her canines into his jugular.

His blood spurted hard into her mouth, like ejaculate, and her mind reeled with a new mixture of hormones as she sucked on his neck and imagined, involuntarily, having hot, rough, sex with him. Her hand crept toward his groin and she had to stop herself, groaning with the effort of steadying her hand into his pulsating neck. He tried to speak, she felt his movements beneath her, but all that escaped was a watery gurgle, and a blood bubble swelled and burst inside Evie’s mouth. She squeezed her eyes closed, loving and hating the feeling in equal measure, he tasted even better than he had smelled.

She was soon blinded into a feeding frenzy, nothing on her mind but blood, the sexual desire had been stripped from her, and her empathy for him had disappeared as she suckled on Michael Brace in a flurry of animal noises and blood spatter.

* * *

 

Negan entered, unannounced, some time later. Michael lay on the cell floor, all but drained and collapsed in on himself. Evie had the forethought, at least, to rip his head from his body when she was done, but she stood and stared at his snapping mouth and cloudy eyes, unable to do the decent thing. She deserved to watch him suffer, after what she had done.

Negan raised his eyebrows and pursed his lips, leaning back and sucking air in noisily.

“My oh my, you went to _town_ on his ass” He whistled, looking smug andproud. “Tell me, red, did he taste as good as he smelled?” Evie closed her eyes gently and turned her face away, which had Negan chuckling. “Oh, that good huh?” She still refused to reply. “Ok,” Negan stepped farther into the room and pushed the door to, “I’ll get rid of the body. I’ll deal with the snapping turtle head, but I need you to do something for me.” Without warning he stamped on Michael’s undead face, Negan’s boot shattering the cranium to a hundred pieces, the crunch reverberating through the room. Evie thought she might throw up, but pushed the back of her hand to her mouth and gulped back the acid burn that threatened.

“I’ll deal with this,” Negan reiterated, “You go with my companion here.” A woman stood at the door, wearing makeup and a dress. She had an air about her that Evie was instantly unsure of, she smelled good, of cinnamon and apples, with an earthy undertone, but she also appeared to have a confidence that no one else she had met in the sanctuary except Negan had. Even Dwight was mousy, eyes averted and voice quiet, but this woman held her head up, and met Negan’s eyes with no issue. She had her arms crossed in front of her chest, and she shrugged at Evie slightly.

“Come on.” Her voice was soft and kind, but Evie didn’t want to be easily fooled. “It’s ok, we’ll get you cleaned up.” The woman wasn’t recoiling in horror, even though Evie was sure she’d be covered in blood and viscera from her intense frenzied feeding session.

The woman didn’t flinch, didn’t worry, just took Evie’s arm like an old friend and pulled her forward. Evie could have resisted, but she was too shocked by the woman’s easy demeanour.

“Go with Sherry,” Negan said behind her, more forcefully than Sherry had suggested it. “Don’t make me ask you again.” Evie turned to Negan, pulling her arm from Sherry’s gentle grip, as rage began to bubble inside her. Now she was fed her young vampire emotions were returning with all their initial strength, and there was literally no control to be had over them.

“It would be nice,” she said through gritted teeth, “if you even asked in the first place.” Negan managed a gentle chuckle, but his fingers flexed at his sides slowly. Evie watched them, thinking maybe he wanted to strangle her but couldn’t in front of the woman. The woman couldn’t possibly know what they were, she was still alive.

“It would be nice,” Negan imitated, “if you could appreciate all we have done for you.” His smile dropped and he stormed forward, face reddening and spittle flying. “You are _not_ a guest here. You are a _tool_ , and you will do what you’re here for or you will _die_ , do you understand?!” Evie dared not flinch as Negan yelled in her face. She felt she’d won just from him losing so much composure, but a fear rolled in her gut, and she turned and went with Sherry as the woman reached for her arm again.


End file.
